The Complete First Season
by eomds1
Summary: Episodes 1 thru 22 as, I hope, the show creator intended.
1. Chapter 1

I have no ownership of these characters and use them without profit. I am just a fan who wants to know how the story would end and realized that in order to write what WOULD happen, I first needed to figure out what had ALREADY happened.

Episode 1:

Emily drilled herself on all the things she thought she ought to know. It was her first day, after all, and she wanted to be perfect.

—Stop!—She scolded herself as she reached for the door—You know it. You can do this…

She allowed herself to savor the moment—…Dr. Owens—

The lobby of Denver Memorial opened in front of her, a beautiful and open space made of wood and glass. Her breath caught. It seemed too large…too professional for a girl just out of medical school.

"Emily?" Called a familiar voice.

As if her heart could not beat any faster!

"Ah! Will! Hi!" she replied with a goofy smile.

—Take it down a notch, Emily— she thought. But how could it be helped? The voice belonged to none other than Will Collins: the most sweet, intelligent, best looking, best smelling… —Okay, thoughts like that will get you nowhere—

"Hey there," Emily tried again, ten times calmer. "Sorry, I'm a little overexcited. It's like first day of school jitters…Not like we're in school anymore…"

"I wouldn't be so sure," Will said, smiling with his perfect teeth. "I hear hospitals are a lot like high schools. We're freshman all over again."

Emily's embarrassing high school experiences flashed before her eyes.

"Ugh! Please don't say that," she implored. She had to look away from his chiseled jaw to search for another subject. "So, where do we go?"

Will's muscular arm pointed and Emily was only too glad to follow. "I'm so glad we're both interning at Denver," he said.

"How could I turn down the chance to breathe the same air as Gina Bandari?" Emily said worshipfully.

—Not to mention the fact that you're here—

Will smiled at puts his arm around her, "I'm just happy to see a friendly face."

—Okay, he's touching you—Emily felt her entire body tingling—Do not spaz out—

As always, what Emily's brain said was usually not what happened. She grew very stiff at his touch, afraid to do anything that would end his attentions. She clutched at her scarf.

"You okay?" Will asked.

"Yeah…no…" Emily said lamely. "It's…cold."

—You totally spazzed out!— She berated, disappointed that he pulled away.

"Listen, I hear this place is pretty cut-throat," Will said, plenty used to his friend's weirdness by now, "so we're going to have to stick together, okay?"

Emily decided in that moment that she could settle for simply being near him. She giggled and nodded in answer.

"You seem like you're in a really good mood today," Will observed.

"It's funny," Emily explained as they entered the locker room, "I've been in school for twenty-three years straight and I finally feel like I'm starting the next phase of my life."

"Pits?" asked an oddly familiar voice.

—No. No no no. No. No— Knowing she shouldn't, Emily turned slow in fear. Looking at her expectantly was a person she had not seen in several years: the dark skinned, dark eyed demon who had made her life a living hell.

"Don't you recognize me?" the snake smiled diabolically.

—Do I recognize you?—Emily tried to disguise her recognition—You hid my clothes after gym class. You prank called my house, you TP-ed my car. You were my tormentor, my nemesis, the girl I debated against in those fateful debate club finals!—

"I'm so bad with names…" Emily managed to say.

"Cassandra Kopelson," she said, smiling her disbelief, "from high school."

"Cassandra Kopelson," Emily tried to seem surprised, "from high school…yeah…So how in the world did you end up in Denver?"

"Gina Bandari," Cassandra said. "Woman's a genius!"

"That's why Emily's here too!" Will cut in.

"Oh!" Cassandra had clearly not noticed Will before. Her serpent eyes hungrily raked his body up and down. "And you are?"

"Will Collins," He beamed at the attention. "Nice to meet you."

"You too," she continued checking him out. Emily felt her blood boil. "So tell me, Will Collins, how do you know Pits?"

"Emily," she interjected, eager to put that nickname back to rest.

"Well, we went to Med School together. So, you know…" Will answered distractedly. "What's with Pits?"

Cassandra, as she had always been, was happy for any reason to put Emily down: "That was her nickname in high school."

"Really," Will tried to catch Emily's eye. "Where'd that come from?"

"You know," Cassandra offered, this time eying Emily up and down, "I can't remember."

"Me neither!" Emily seized the opportunity. "That's why I go by Emily. Or Em. Sometimes Emmy…"

"Oh, lets go," Cassandra said when she saw the other interns moving out. "We don't want to get off on the wrong foot. I hear this place is cutthroat."

"I literally just said that," Will said, intrigued.

"Great minds." Cassandra walked off and Will followed like a puppy.

—Already? They talked for what, two minutes?—Emily huffed as she struggled with her scarf. She left the locker rooms several steps behind the love of her life and her nemesis, who were still talking animatedly.

"That seemed awkward," grimaced another surgical intern who stopped Emily from charging mindlessly ahead.

"Yeah," she said, snapping out of her fixation. "I just thought I left high school behind."

"Hilarious," said Tyra sardonically. "A hospital is totally like high school."

"That's the second time I've heard that today," Emily whined.

"Because it's true."

...

Micah remembered his first day as an intern. He didn't even have to think about it: the same emotions were clearly displayed on the faces of the new interns who lined up, listening to Chief Dupre give his welcome speech. He saw in them a mixture of nerves and determination, fear and the desire to impress.

Chief Dupre's daughter, who Micah had met a few times before, leaned over to whisper to one of her fellow interns, drawing Micah's attention to the cute blonde. He tried to feel annoyed at them for speaking out of turn, but he knew the Head of Surgery's speeches to be almost too grandiose to take seriously. Besides, the blonde was just his type: just the right kind of geeky with a pride that didn't require being bigger or more confident than others and the kind of eyes that displayed intelligence and warmth. It was all right there on the surface.

He tried not to stare at her. Failing this, he looked back at his boss.

"It is easy to compare ourselves to gods," Chief Dupre was saying. "We are gods. Each and every day we perform miracles. Welcome to Denver Memorial."

Chief Dupre then turned and motioned to Micah, introducing him as Dr. Barnes, their Resident. Micah fought a slight blush as the cute blonde smiled at him. She then turned along with her group to face Dr. Bandari, their Attending.

Dr. Bandari, clearly tired of the intern's first day already, rushed from the room.

"We're walking," was all the warning she gave.

Micah tried to keep up with the cute blonde as the group sped through the halls. She followed her Attending with such focus that he had trouble staying near.

"Your job is to keep my patients alive." Gina was saying. "Any issues you have, you bring them to Micah, Micah brings it to me. You and I don't talk unless absolutely necessary, which I sincerely hope isn't the case."

Listening with the intensity of a shark, the blonde tracked every word. Micah managed to push his way towards her.

"Breathe!" he instructed.

She slowed for a moment, smiling at him nervously. "Is it that obvious?"

He flirted back, "I'm a doctor."

They shared a quick smile before charging off again at full speed.

...

Was it Cassandra's imagination or was Emily staring hungrily at Dr. Collin's jugular? Cassandra knew how to read people, and she knew how to read Emily Owens. It shook Cassandra's confidence somewhat to find her high school nemesis present on her fist day of work, as though an experience that already promised to be competitive had now also became a grudge match.

Watching Emily stare at Will made her all the more excited to stay close to him. His flirting earlier told her that there was nothing between he and his college study-buddy, but she could tell that it was not quite that simple.

Dr. Bandari could also tell that Emily was not paying attention, so she put the intern on the spot. Cassandra prepared herself to leer when Emily was asked to submit a diagnosis. Both were surprised when Emily gave a succinct answer, then proceeded to explain in lay terms to the little girl they were observing.

Cassandra felt her old jealousy of Emily rise in her chest. It felt oddly familiar, despite the distance of several years. With it, she felt also (for the first time in a long time) the desire to down-talk and plot so as to once again come out on top.

Emily was assigned with discharge papers and the group of interns left the room. Dr. Bandari and Dr. Barnes were speaking, so Cassandra turned to Will.

"It is so strange to come here and see a familiar face," she said.

"What, Emily?" Will asked. "Yeah. Isn't it great? I was saying to her as we came in that a friendly face is definitely welcome. I've always been on team sports, you know, so coming here with someone on my team already makes me feel a lot better."

"What do you play?" She inquired excitedly. Sports guys always had the best bodies.

"Oh, you know," he tried to act coy. "It's silly."

"You can't bring up team sports and then hold out on me," Cassandra put on her best pouty lips.

Will laughed. "Okay, okay. I played baseball."

"See, that wasn't so hard," Cassandra flirted. She touched his arm and let her fingers linger. "Well, I'll be on your team, Dr. Collins.

"Dr. Bandari!" a nurse yelled from down the hall. "It's the girl!"

Gina burst through the group to the front and led them in a hurry back down the hall. They came upon the little girl, confused but awake, surrounded by frightened nurses and Emily holding a large needle full of fluid. Bandari took charge of the patient and Emily was pushed back. She left the room.

The jealous creature in Cassandra roared viciously. Will and all the other interns were cheering and patting their fellow on the back, but Cassandra couldn't be bothered.

"Oh!" she exclaimed instead, gesturing to Emily's wet armpits, "now I remember why we called you Pits!

...

Micah walked into 501 with two sandwiches.

"I can't stay for long, but I'll have a bite," he told his mother, who stared at him with trepidation.

"I don't want lunch," Joyce said firmly. "I want to know what's going on."

"Well, so do I," said Micah, trying to sound nonplussed. "But the tests aren't back yet and in the mean time I'm hungry, so eating seems like the best thing to do."

Joyce pursed her lips, but took the sandwich.

"You promise you'll tell me the moment you know?" Joyce pleaded.

"Mom..."

"No," Joyce scolded, "don't give me excuses. You may be a doctor, but I'm your mother. I win."

Micah smiled at her, and she smiled back.

"Tell me some gossip," Joyce commanded, biting into her sandwich. "How are the new interns?"

"Well, there's this one..."

...

"Does that doctor know how you feel?" asked Abbey, the little girl who had almost died.

Emily turned her eyes to the girl in surprise. She didn't even need to ask for clarification.

"Oh come on," Abbey rolled her eyes, "the one you were staring at during rounds?"

Emily considered denying it, but there didn't seem to be much point. She had been staring. "Even if I was staring at him…a little…that doesn't mean..."

"He totally likes you too!" the girl blurted.

"How can you tell?" Emily said immediately. The desperation in her voice was evident.

"He was looking at you when you were talking to me," Abbey explained.

"Looking?" Emily sought, "or looking looking?"

"Looking looking," Abbey said with complete confidence.

Emily's heart leapt, but she stopped to consider the source. "Can you tell the difference?"

"Course!" said the girl with an air of finality. "I'm twelve."

Emily nodded. She started to say something, but the girl continued: "You should tell him how you feel."

...

-You should tell him how you feel-Emily repeated-Wait! You should tell him how you feel? Can that be right? You're the shy girl. You don't simply TELL PEOPLE HOW YOU FEEL-

Emily and Will stood together in the dark scanning room. The MRI tech read the screen as their patient was scanned, but otherwise they were alone.

-But why not?-Emily's thoughts continued-what if you never say anything because you're afraid that something bad will happen, and then NOTHING happens? Ever?-

-Just do it. Just tell him-

She looked over. His beautiful profile caused her heart to beat wildly. Maybe talking was too much to ask right away.

-Okay, I'm going to move over a few inches so our shoulders are touching and if he doesn't move, he likes me-she reasoned.

Slowly, she inched over so that their arms barely touched. Her arm tingled madly and she felt she might melt. He didn't move, but he didn't do anything else either.

-Maybe he doesn't feel it-she stressed. She changed her criteria-if he looks at me! If he looks at me I'll know he likes me-

She pivoted her head to look up at him; to look up at his bright, gorgeous eyes. They shared a smile, but Emily's chest was too full of butterflies to hold it. She looked ahead for a moment, in complete agony. Touching and looks wouldn't do it, she realized. She had to speak.

"Will?" she practically squealed.

He turned his head, "Hm?"

Her heart was beating too quickly. The blood pumped too loudly through her ears. She couldn't speak. She had been right the first time. Words were too hard.

"Nothing," she said. A mixture of relief and regret washed over her.

...

"You two, come with me," Micah commissioned the cute blonde and her companion: Dr. Owens and Dr. Kopelson. He had been given two folders: one with the lab results for 501 and one with an illegible signature that needed deciphering. He handed the latter to the blonde with instructions to find the Mrs. Ellish's daughter and took his mother's tests to the roof.

The roof of Denver Memorial was a bit of a haven for surgical doctors, providing fresh air, quiet, and a respite from the undeniably god-like aspects of a job that centered on life and death. He rested himself tensely on one of the folding chairs and placed the folder on his knees. He stared at is for several moments, trying to push back the moment of knowing.

Once he knows, there is no going back.

Micah finally worked up the courage to open it when his pager goes off. He knows he must answer it, but knows also that he cannot merely glance at the results. Somewhat glad to be spared for an hour or so, he puts the folder under his arms as re-enters the building.

As he rushes towards Dr. Bandari, Micah is stopped by his Alzheimer's patient, Mrs. Ellish. Neirher Dr. Owens nor Dr. Kopelson are in sight.

"What are you doing, Mrs. Ellish?" He asked.

"Oh, hello doctor," she said sweetly. "I'm just looking for my daughter, Mary Anne."

His mother's tests still on his mind, Micah felt a pang of annoyance. Interns were supposed to make his job easier. They should ay least keep track of their patients.

"We're trying to help you find her, I promise," he said soothingly. "But I need you to wait for her in your room."

Mrs. Ellish nodded and followed him to the elevator. They rose it down and it opened to a frantic Emily Owens.

"Oh, thank goodness!" She spoke to their patient. She looked at Micah with sincere apology. "We just looked away for a second."

Micah believed her. It was unfair of him to take out his frustration about his mom on the interns. Especially on their first day. Plus, how could he stay angry at the cute blonde?

An elevator opposite then opened and Dr. Bandari came out. She eyed the shared guilty looks of her Resident and their intern.

"What's going on?" She asked incredulously.

Micah gave Emily a knowing look. "Mrs. Elish wanted to take a little walk, so Dr. Owens accommodated. Why don't you take her back to her room now, huh?"

Micah could see Emily's gratitude. She nodded and guided the old woman away. He tried very hard not to watch her leave.

"You wanted to see me?" He said instead to his boss.

...

Micah, to Emily, was a person to pay close attention to. Not only was he an excellent doctor, but he had started at Denver Memorial as an intern, just like them, and had worked his way up. Where he was today was where she would be in five years.

"Five years," Emily exhaled, taking it in.

She stood at the window of the OR doors, watching as Micah made a cut. Will, who stood at the other window, cocked his head in question.

"Micah's been here five years," Emily elaborated, "and he's only now doing a solo surgery."

Will felt the gravity of that thought, but stayed positive. "Well, we thought med school would last forever, and it flew by."

Emily nodded, watching Micah moving deftly.

"Do you remember what Prof McCallum said when we cut our cadavers in Gross Anatomy?" asked Will.

"'You will remember this moment-the place you were standing-when you made your first cut.'" Emily quoted.

"Do you?" Will asked. "Do you remember?"

-Of course-Emily's heart swelled at the thought-I was standing next to you…-

"I…cut through the sternum," she said instead.

"And I knew by watching you that you were going to be a great surgeon," Will said, his kind eyes boring into hers. "You have the most amazing hands."

-He loves my hands!-Emily sang. The butterflies returned to her chest-say it, say it, say it!-

She opened her mouth to do just that: to bring forth the feelings she denied so readily, to lay her heart bare for him to see, to admit to all the world that she loved this man and beg that he love her too.

"Thank you," she said instead. Embarrassed by thoughts no one else could hear, Emily turned back to watch Micah's surgery. He was looking her way and nodded in recognition.

Still flustered, she shot him a thumbs up.

...

Micah finished changing after surgery and placed his mother's case folder in front of him. Bolstered by the adrenaline of a solo surgery and the cute blonde's attention (she had come to cheer him on!), he grabbed at it with a sudden surge of hope.

Almost immediately, he snapped it shut. It couldn't be. Please, no.

He opened it once more, this time with care, and read every word, analysed every number, checked every stat in excruciating detail. Many minutes later he closed it with the same carefulness.

He placed a hand over his mouth and stared straight ahead. This couldn't be happening.

...

Will wasn't trying to listen to Dr. Bandari as she scolded his friend Emily. He was trying to flirt with the gorgeous and amazingly confident Cassandra. But the raised voice of his Attending was hard to ignore.

Emily had told him what was going on - how the little girl had begged for Emily to be part of her surgery and how Emily said that she could request it. Bandari, it seemed, felt like she was forcing her hand.

Will knew otherwise. His friend was a never-ending well of compassion. No one who knew Emily would accuse her of anything but sweetness and good intentions.

Bandari turned and stormed away. Cassandra tried to catch his eye, but Will walked up to Emily, knowing that, after being yelled at by her idol,

she would be heartbroken.

"You're a rock star," he said. Seeing her devastated face, he pulled her into a hug. "Come here. Come on. She'll realize it soon enough."

He could feel as Emily awkwardly touched his back. He patted hers roughly.

"Okay?" He asked as she pulled back. She nodded.

Concluding that she had been comforted, Will was about to tell Emily to come back with him and join his conversation with Cassandra, when out of nowhere Emily began speaking.

"I like you," she began. He grinned. He liked her too. She was his best friend. "I've liked you since you cracked that chest in gross anatomy. You took out the heart and held it in your hands and I remember thinking that could be my heart. He may as well be holding my heart..."

Emily continued her proclamation, growing ever more animated and passionate. Will's heart sunk. No. Please no. She didn't mean "like" as in friendship. It's not as though he could have a female friend without, you know, thinking of her that way. But he didn't THINK of her that way. He didn't fantasize about pinning her up against a wall like he had been wanting to do to Cassandra all day.

"I don't want to be that shy girl," Emily was saying, "always wishing her life would turn out the way I want it to. I have to make it turn out the way I want it to. And what I want-what I really really want…is you."

Will could tell by her tear-filled smile that she was done. He grinned uncomfortably, looking away to find Cassandra, but finding that she had left. He was really going to have to do this, wasn't he?

"I don't know….Em…I just…" Will stammered. "I don't see you like that."

He could see the immediate reaction in his friend, who had screwed up her face with the agony of it all. She was the easiest person to read that Will had ever met, and he could clearly see that she had died a little bit at his rejection.

"I can't even tell you…I'm so touched by what you said," he breathed. He wanted so badly to comfort her. "I really hope we can still be friends because I really value our friendship…"

"Of course we can be friends," Emily said, rallying her strength. She was visibly putting on her inadequate masks. "I just needed to get that off my chest….and, now it's off…and it's great."

Will nodded, desperate to get away and yet wanting to assuage her pain.

...

-Where's the cute blonde?-thought Micah. His day was going badly enough, least she could do was give him another thumbs up.

"Where's Dr. Ownes?" he asked the nurses.

"I don't know," said one. "I saw her empty out the vending machine and then go into stairwell."

Micah nodded, contemplating what that might mean. He kinda felt like doing something similar himself.

He burst through the door, assuming she had gone towards the roof, but found her to be sitting just inside stuffing her face with chocolate.

He said a sad, "Hey."

"Hi," she returned, clearly miserable. He knew the feeling.

"Doreen says she saw you come in here with half the vending machine," Micah explained. She contemplated her snacks. "You alright?"

Her transparent face rearranged itself into something like strength. "Yeah. No. I'm really great," she said, but her pretense couldn't be sustained. It all came flooding out: "Except the fact that Gina hates me, my 'ballvery' backfired, and my high school nemesis is being very nefarious! And…these are…" She turned to him with the most endearingly pathetic look, "stale."

"Sorry," Micah teased, heart melting. "You lost me at ballvery?"

"I'm just having the worst day."

Emily furrowed her brows and frowned, looking as though she wanted to curl into the stairs and die.

Metaphoric dying, anyway. Not the real kind, like we see every day. He nodded, lost in thought. Tough love, he decided, was what they both needed.

"Um, right," he said. "Here, follow me."

Micah watched as Emily crammed the remaining chocolate into her mouth and stuffed the unopened packages into her pockets. He led her back out into the hallway and pointed at rooms as they passed.

"That man in there is going to have to learn to walk again without a leg," he said. "That woman in there is going to have to have a colostomy bag for the next three months."

Micah saw that Emily understood his intentions. She seemed properly chastised, but he wasn't done. The next one was for him. He wanted so badly to tell someone.

"And the woman down in 501 is going to be told that she has stage 4 pancreatic cancer," he said bravely. It was easy to talk to her-it almost seemed easier to deal with. "Now, her son's going to try to sell her on the fact that there's all these new trials she can get into, but you and I know the truth: she's got 6 months-a year if she's lucky. And she's going to feel really sick every single day of the year. So…no. You're not having the worst day. Not by a long shot."

"You must think I'm incredibly self-absorbed," she apologized.

"No, just human," he said with complete sympathy. "Now, come on. Hand over the Ring-Dings and get back to work."

With a resolute face she dug a package from her pocket, handing it to him and turning to leave.

"And the other one," he says, not fooled. He knew that not even the best speech could expect a complete junk food purge.

In the most compelling act of mock-seriousness he had ever seen, Emily pivoted, pulled a bag from her coat. And slid it slyly into his hand. She gave him a glare that asked, "are you happy now," and walked away.

Micah checked her out as she retreated, definitely happy. He had met a cute and funny girl: certainly that wasn't something that could happen on "the worst day."

He smiled at her retreating form, grateful to have been reminded.

...

"And then she just put her finger on the girl's heart, like she had been doing it forever!" Will bragged of his friend Emily.

Cassandra gritted her teeth and nodded.

"I can't believe Emily has already assisted in a surgery," Will said with amazement.

Cassandra held in her annoyance. Emily, Emily. That's all anyone was talking about. The clutzy, dorky, supposedly lovable girl who stumbled her way into assisting in the OR on their first day.

"I can't believe Emily weaseled her way into surgery," Cassandra echoed crossly.

"Why do you say it like that?" Will asked, bemused as always, but frowning also. Cassandra worried immediately that she had given something away.

"Nothing," she said quickly. "Now tell me more about your baseball days."

"Whoa, not so fast," Will shut her down. "Emily's my friend, I can't just stand by while you-"

"Never mind," Cassandra insisted. She thought she might rather alienate this insanely hot guy than let on to what was really the matter."

"I may not be a head doctor," Will said, turning on all of his charm. "But you've known me what, eight hours? You can trust me!"

"Okay, I just..." Cassandra emitted a frustrated groan. "Ugh, I just don't understand why SHE has to be here. I was the top of my class in pre-Med, top in Med school. The only person who ever beat me-not just beat me, but beat me all the time-was Pits! In high school! And now she's here at the hospital that I was supposed to take by storm-"

"Oh, okay, wow," Will stepped back, stopping her mid-rant. "I guess it's just a day for those kind of confessions."

"Never mind," Cassandra repeated. She took his sudden distance to be disgust. She sniffled and took another step.

"No, no," Will moved closer. "I didn't mean...I'm sorry, I'm just a little overwhelmed. Not because of what you said! Just a crazy day!"

"Is this supposed to be making me feel better?" she pouted.

"You don't need to be jealous of her Cassandra," Will said, trying again. "You are this amazing, beautiful, intelligent doctor, and it doesn't matter who else is here: you are going to be the queen of this place. I can tell. Okay, so Emily is really good too. So what? That doesn't make you any less amazing. Just do your best, and everyone will love you."

Cassandra stared at him with tear-rimmed eyes. All thoughts of Emily immediately disappeared from her mind.

"What?" Will asked, unnerved by her silence. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No," Cassandra smiled. "You said I was beautiful."

Micah crossed paths with the cute blonde again. She had her coat and scarf on, in addition to a satisfied look. He was immensely glad to see a friendly face.

"I heard you kicked ass in surgery today," he offered. "Not the worst day after all, huh?"

"No," she admitted, giving him a grateful look. "It wasn't. Are you leaving?"

Was she going to invite him for a drink? He tempered his excitement, seeing as how he still had that one awful task left.

"No, not yet," he said. "See you tomorrow?"

She nodded. "G'night."

"Night," he called after her. Micah watched her walk away again, letting himself enjoy the last bit of good in his day.

Steeling himself, he turned to the door of room 501. He's been dreading this moment all day, putting it off until the last possible moment.

He entered to find his mother where he left her.

"Hi, mom," he said.

Despite his effort to remain positive, his despair must have shown clearly on his face because she spoke first: "Just tell me the truth."


	2. Chapter 2

Episode 2:

"I'm telling you," said the nurse, "I was standing right over there. She was totally hitting on Jessica!"

Remembering Emily's moving announcement of love the other day, Will didn't see how this was possible.

"I'm sorry," he said, "but there's no way!" He looked at Cassandra and Tyra, who were also leaning against the nurse's desk, for support. None was offered. "I've known this girl for years. She wouldn't just do something like that."

"Maybe you don't know her as well as you think," said the nurse seriously. "If she can be one way with us and one wY with you, maybe she's crazy. I once had this cat-"

"Hey, Willy!" Emily yelled as she approached. The gathered interns turned to look at her.

-Willy?-Will cringed.

Cassandra looked up at him, "You go by willy?"

Will could see the embarrassment all over Emily's face. "Um, you know...I-I-I-I," he tried to humor her, but the danger of being called 'Willy' was too great. "No…never."

Emily nodded at this and began laughing to herself. And...then she kept laughing. Will felt guilty for his part in what he knew was his part in his friend's discomfort. If only he had turned her down more gently...given her hope, perhaps...but what would be expected of anyone when, out of nowhere, their best friend proclaimed their love in the middle of a busy hospital hallway? It was an impossible situation.

"What's so funny?" asked Cassandra.

"It was a thing I saw on TV," Emily invented, digging herself further in. "It was, like, a horse thing."

Will bit his lip. He had teased Emily plenty of times for her habit of talking and talking until what could have been a convincing lie was fully exposed. Thing is, had anyone else addressed him like that-or had anyone else rejected her-they would have talked about it together all night. But that was no longer an option...

Emily looked at her watch and excused herself.

Cassandra gave Will a look and turned back to the nurse. "Well, that was weirder than usual," she said.

"I told you she was crazy!" justified the nurse.

...

"What the hell was that?" Tyra confronted Emily in the bathroom.

"Hmm?" Emily replied casually. "Nothing."

"Oh come on," Tyra jeered, "you're so full of-" Emily turned on the hand dryer so as to drown out her voice.

Tyra pursed her lips. She could win this game. "Fine," she said, "I'll go ask Will."

"No!" Emily rushed after her. Tyra was amazed at how easy it all was. "I might have told him that I liked him," Emily confessed, "and he might have shot me down. That might have happened."

She walked from the room and Tyra followed, jaw opened in shock.

Emily was sweet. Also, she was uncool. Uncool people were easy targets for Tyra, who had little patience for egotists and narcissists. She wanted to have someone's full attention, she wanted them to need her. Emily so clearly needed her.

Will was sweet too, but he was also smoking hot. A girl didn't need to be straight to notice. He was wildly out of poor Emily's league. This didn't make her puppy love any less adorable.

"So what made you think that he would ever be into you?" Tyra asked later as they were making rounds. She added unapologetically: "No offense."

"Nothing," Emily insisted. Tyra arched an eyebrow. "Ugh, fine. It was a message he left."

"What kind of message?" Tyra inquired.

"In med school after finals we got kind of drunk," Emily began, "and when I got home there was this message from him on the answering machine."

"I want to hear this message," Tyra demanded. She knew the message would help her determine the extent to which Emily was stricken. Either it was mundane and she read into it, or this guy was stringing her along.

"It was two years ago," Emily said. "I didn't save it."

Tyra rolled her eyes: "Of course you saved the message."

...

Micah watched as Emily told a patient he had a year to live. He had just had a heart attack. Every muscle in her face showed how difficult a task she found this to be. Micah knew Bandari would hate it, but he felt it was in keeping with all the things he liked about her. You can't fault compassion. You just can't.

The patient's grandson stood beside his bed, visibly shrinking as the news was delivered. It couldn't be an easy thing to hear. He knew from experience that it could be devastating. Micah wondered if having to tell his mother that she was sick had hardened his heart to the giving of such news.

As the interns finished and walked out, he turned to the patient's nephew. "I know this is a hard thing to hear," he offered. "Trust me, I really, really know. I want you to know that we have people here you can talk to."

The boy nodded, holding his hand firmly to his mouth, unable to speak.

Outside the room Dr. Bandari finished the gentle but insistent instructions to Emily that she should maintain distance. Emily looked properly mollified, but also still very sad.

"It gets easier," Micah moved to stand in front of her. He meant it to be encouraging.

"And that's a good thing?" she raised a sad eyebrow.

"I'm not sure," he said honestly. "But it does."

He gave her what he hoped was a supportive nod before returning to rounds.

...

"What's so funny?" Cassandra asked a giggling circle of nurses.

"Oh, nothing," said one, swallowing her laughter. They dispersed. They threw fleeting looks into a room where Emily was talking to a woman.

"Oh, come one," Cassandra begged. "I'm a friend to the 'Horndog Owens' Facebook page. Don't hold out on me."

The nurse's eyes darted to the room and then back. "Okay," she said. "There's this patient who has OCD, she made me disinfect the entire bed, the blankets, the hospital gown-EVERYTHING-before she would just sit down. Like we don't have enough to do. I thought that if Dr. Owens is so self-obsessed as to hit on every nurse she sees, that the two would be a perfect match."

"Well, I'm certainly happy to see her kept out of the way," Cassandra admitted.

"How's your patient, doctor?" the nurse asked as Emily walked past.

"Fine," Emily said defiantly. "She's very sweet."

"Yeah, I bet," the nurse said under her breath.

"Hey, how's it going?" came Will's voice.

Cassandra turned around and gave him a huge smile, "Will!" Her eyes raked his body, "Just the hot doctor I wanted to see."

Will grinned, displaying his perfect teeth. "I was thinking about you, too."

Cassandra cocked her head, "I didn't say I was 'thinking about' you," she said slowly. "But that is good to know..."

...

"Deep breath, Mr. Mullins," Emily said to her heart attack patient.

"Max," he implored. "Please call me Max."

Emily nodded, "Deep breath, Max."

"I guess I should have seen this coming, huh?" He asked. "I'm an old man, right? I just always thought I'd feel ready near the end. I don't feel ready."

Emily tried to mask her sadness. What could you say to someone after you told them that things were hopeless?

Max answered instead, "You want some advice?"

"Yeah!" she said in earnest. "Any and all."

"None of it's big," he said simply. "That's what I tell my grandson: stop worrying so much. None of it's big."

Emily considered the encounter with Will this morning-considered how she had practiced a casual good morning (and then proceeded to psych herself out to the point where she called him 'Willy'). The thought of meeting his eye was almost inconceivable-the thought of working along side him without spazzing out impossible. That the nurses hated her or that Cassandra was still taking every opportunity to put her down seemed to make every little motion she made unpleasant.

"Feels big, though," she told him.

...

Will thought it felt pretty big too, considering Emily's new-found embarrassment whenever she saw him meant that the awkwardness was both ever-present and immensely painful to witness. It hurt him that she might continue to make both a fool of herself and of him.

He was walking down the hallway and looked up in time to see Emily on a collision course with him. He veared one way then the other, but her motions mirrored his. He lifted an arm to point and she ducked under it.

-she ducked under it?-Will thought in amazement-what the...?-

Will paused where he stood, feeling annoyance swell in his lungs. He did not want this. He did not want to be afraid to walk down the halls of the hospital or to have to go out of his way to avoid her. It was so unfair! He didn't ask her to say those things or to feel that way. He didn't ask for her to throw their years of talking and studying together into question. Because it was all a question now. He had been having a conversation, but had she even been listening? How could he know she hadn't been thinking of him...like that...reading into everything he'd ever said to her. God, what had he said to her.

Will felt his annoyance turn into resentment and anger. He felt trapped. Was this what his life was going to be over the course of his internship? Was he always going to be made to feel responsible and guilty? Was he really going to lose the friendship that he had valued so much?

...

"It isn't necessary," Micah's mother waved him off.

"Mom…" he replied with a warning in his voice.

"I'll just be sitting there-" she explained.

"And I'll 'just be sitting there' with you," Micah said with finality. "It's your first session and I'm not going to let you sit there alone, alright?"

He began to walk away. She called after him, "Maybe this isn't even the right thing?"

"It's not up for debate, okay?" Micah insisted. "I got my schedule cleared-"

"The chemo, I mean," Joyce said carefully. Micah haunted in his tracks, a feeling of terror spreading through his body. She continued, "Maybe the chemo isn't the right thing."

"What?" Micah said angrily, stepping closer.

"I've done some research-" Joyce began.

"Look, I told you to stay off the internet-" Micah scolded.

"The survival rates for pancreatic cancer-"

"You need to get your information from credible sources!" He yelled.

"Less than 10%, Micah!" Joyce yelled back. "Less than 10% are alive in five years."

Micah had been afraid that she would find those kind of statistics. Before the news of her illness, these odds had seemed pretty bleak to him. They were bleak-he wasn't going to lie-but he knew what was bleaker: 0%. If one out of ten patients made it, that meant there was hope.

-All anyone needs is hope-

"Which means 10% ARE alive in five years," Micah said firmly. "You can beat this."

Micah could tell that his mother wasn't convinced, but she saw the pain in her son's eyes, so she nodded her acceptance. Her lack of hope ate at him-she would need it in order to fight this.

"I think someone's waiting for you," Joyce said, nodding towards the door.

Micah turned to see the cute blond waiting for him. He felt somewhat ashamed to be seen by her. Were his emotions transparent? Would she know? The last thing he needed was for the pity of all the hospital.

Somewhat annoyed that he didn't have the words to convince his mother, he left her to reset.

...

Emily asked Micah: "How's your pancreas patient?"

"Good," he said perfunctorily. "What's up?"

Emily could tell something was wrong. Since when was Micah short with anyone?

"Oh, um," she stammered, having expected a different response: "Max's insurance company is refusing to pay because they've determined that 'his chances for surviving are minimal.'"

Micah stopped in his tracks and turned on her. Emily felt slight fear at the intensity in his eyes. "You know what?" he shouted, "I am so sick of all these people who think they know what's going to happen. Nobody knows!"

Emily nodded, trying to show her agreement.

"If he wants a procedure," Micah continued, "Just…just get it approved. I'm sorry, I just need you to deal with this right now."

Micah stormed away. Emily tried not to feel hurt. It wasn't personal, she knew. People are allowed to have bad days. Like he had helped with hers, though, she very much wanted to help with his.

"Okay," she replied lamely.

She thought about him while walking down the hall. It was only when she saw Will that she was jolted out of it. Will, having noticed her, grimaced and turned back the way he had come.

-Okay, you need to defuse the awkwardness-Emily thought.

"Will, wait!' she cried. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

He stopped and turned, though reluctantly. "Yeah. Yeah, you know, sure."

"So," she struggled to meet his eyes. She had to do this: she had to be an adult. "Obviously things are a little awkward between us, and before everything snowballs I wanted to see if we could just put what happened behind us and move on, because I'm not dwelling. And I'm okay. I'm not upset with you or anything."

"You're sure?" Will asked, though there was something off about his voice. "That you're not upset with me?

"No!" she said, "Not at all."

"Well, that's...that's a huge relief," Will said sarcastically. "As long as this relationship can continue on your terms, right?" Angrily, he walked past her.

"Wait," Emily turned, confused. "What?"

"You make some sweeping proclamation that you're in love with me?" Will hissed in a hushed voice.

"I would hardly call it a 'proclamation'-"

"Emily, we were friends and co-workers," Will said. Emily felt her heart fall. "And now every single time I ask you to run a CBC I'm going to wonder if you're reading something into it."

"Trust me, I'm not reading any…" Emily attempted to defend herself. "It's very clear that you don't like me."

"That's the thing, Emily," Will said angrily, "I do like you. A lot. You kept me sane in med school, you were the person I could unload to and laugh with…"

-Oh no!-Emily panicked-he thinks we can't be friends anymore! Lie, Emily, lie like your life depends on it!-

"We can still do that!" She tried to calm herself, "I just…look, I was just freaking out. I was so nervous about the job and I think I attached all this significance to you because you were familiar. But the point is you said no, and that's it."

"Yeah?" he asked, clearly still uncertain.

Emily nodded, "I mean, did you think I was going to pine over you forever? I mean, you are a cool guy, but come on. I am moving on."

Will nodded, looking somewhat relieved.

-He's buying it-she thought-stop talking-

"...in fact, I already have another crush..."

-What is wrong with you?-

"On who?" Will asked. Emily's panic rose once more. Who?!

Emily searched the area for someone to attach herself to. It was all female nurses, until...

"Micah," she said quickly, motioning to their Resident. "I have a crush on Micah."

"You do?" said a titillated Cassandra, who had snuck up from behind.

Emily's gaze flickered to Will. If she denied it now, he would doubt everything she had said. "Yes," she said slowly. "I do. Please don't tell anyone."

"You have my word," Cassandra said unconvincingly.

Emily grimaced at her and Cassandra beamed back. Will lent his unconvinced smile to the group.

-You are so screwed-Emily concluded.

...

Will and Cassandra approached the nurse's station after Emily had walked away. To say he was incredulous was an understatement.

"You don't t believe her do you?" Will asked Cassandra.

"Emily's crush?" she asked. "Why not, it's cute!"

"Emily's got a crush?" asked one of the gossiping nurses. "Who is it?"

"Micah!" Will exclaimed, hardly able to believe it.

Cassandra hit him playfully in the ribs and rolled her eyes. "You weren't supposed to tell! Boys are so bad at keeping secrets."

"What, no!" Will looking pleadingly at the nurses. "You wouldn't tell anyone, would you?"

"Are you crazy? I have to tell everyone I know. She is such a horndog!" exclaimed the nurse, "I am tweeting that right now!"

"Wow," Cassandra laughed.

"Look, it's fine," Will said, tired of feeling guilty. "She not on Twitter. She'll never know."

...

Gossiping nurses were a bit of a stereotype, but stereotype with plenty of reality behind it. Micah had always found that the rumors became worse when a new batch of interns arrived. The excitement of the unknown was almost too good to resist.

But why were the nurses staring at him?

The cute blonde walked past and Micah called out to her. He still felt very guilty for snapping at her earlier.

"Hey, great work," he said. "Just got the call: the cath was approved."

"Great!" she said happily, walking away.

One of the nurses leaned in, "Watch out. that girl's a barracuda and apparently she's after you now."

Micah's heart leapt, unbidden. What was that supposed to mean? He tried not to let his excitement show.

"The gossip in this place is out of control," he said.

...

"Can you just talk to me please," begged Emily's OCD patient from the MRI. "Otherwise I keep thinking: tumor, tumor, tumor."

Emily sympathized. She had fought hard to get the scan approved immediately so that she wouldn't have had to lay around all night thinking: tumor, tumor, tumor.

"Yeah, sure," Emily spoke into the microphone. "Just try to relax, which I realize is THE worst thing you say to someone who can't relax, because then you get all worked up about the fact that you can't relax and you start focusing on it, which gets you even more worked up. I totally get that. It's like today, I've been telling myself all day to just act normal and that hasn't been too successful. I think it's because the situation isn't normal and I don't really know when it's ever going to be normal again between us..."

Emily came closer to the microphone by sitting. There was a freedom in being able to talk without having to look someone in the eye. People judged with their eyes.

"I just, I keep replaying this stupid thing that I did over and over and over again," she said, thinking about the rush of words (verbal vomit, truly) that had started all her troubles. What had she been thinking, following the advice of a twelve-year-old girl?

"...and then replaying all the moments that led up to it," Emily continued. "Like... the time he stared at me during lab," she remembered the smiles they had shared, "and the time we rented a house with our friends during med school and we just talked all night long..."

They had talked about everything: medicine and philosophy and gossip and relationships. She remembered the two of them sitting on a starlit roof, huddled close for warmth, talking all night and then watching the sunrise.

"That's the thing about Will and I," Emily smiled. "We can really talk. And he makes me laugh," she smiled just thinking about it. "I think it's because he has this way of looking at the world which is so different from the way I look at the world. Which is probably why, when I'm with him I feel like everything's going to be okay-"

"Actually," interrupted a voice from the MRI, "maybe a little quiet would be good for awhile."

Emily had forgotten her audience. Embarrassed to have revealed so much, she blushed in the darkness.

"Right," she moved back. "Sorry, yeah."

...

Micah sat in the shaded break room reading a newspaper. The cute blonde enters, looking somewhat upset.

He asked, "Are you okay?"

She nods: "Tired."

"19 hours in a 24 hour shift?" Micah sympathized. "Yeah, tired makes sense."

Emily walked towards him and sat. "I heard Max's cat went well."

"Yup, but the next 24 hours are critical," he replied. There were other things he wanted to talk about, though. "So, listen, um, I want to apologize again for snapping at you before..."

"Oh, please," the cute blonde waved him off.

"No, no, no, no, no: I should explain," he insisted. Micah had already decided that he wanted to tell her, in fact. He didn't want to freak her out, though. "I mean, it will probably set around anyway. This place is a rumor mill."

Micah set his mug and paper on the coffee table and clapped his hands together, trying to figure out where to begin.

"Anyway, um," he attempted. Her friendly blue eyes urged him on. "The woman in 501 is actually…my mom."

Emily was clearly startled. "What?" she shrieked.

"She has pancreatic cancer," Micah explained. "Which is why I've been a little on edge."

"Oh," Emily breathed. She exuded pity, but not the kind of pity that was belittling. It almost made him feel stronger, sharing this with her. "Micah...I'm so sorry..."

"Thanks," he said quickly. "Anyway, she's starting chemo at 8 AM-"

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah," Micah let himself really think about it: "I am. I don't know why, but I think she's going to be okay. I mean, somebody has to beat the odds, right? So why can't it be my mom?"

"Yeah," Emily, eyes slightly teary, nodded and smiled.

The door to the break room burst open and Dr. Kopelson rushes in. Micah and Emily both turned to assess the newcomer, who stopped upon seeing them.

"Oh! Sorry," she breathed, smiling cryptically. "I didn't know you two were busy…I'll just leave you alone to, um, get to know each other better."

She backed from the room and, giggling, closed the door behind her.

Micah knew immediately that this was related to the rumor the nurse had told him. He tingled a bit to think that the cute blonde might have a crush on him.

"Okay," she said. I" should explain what that was all about."

"No," Micah offered, blushing. "You really don't have to…"

"Here's the thing, um…" she started. "This is embarrassing."

He grew slightly lightheaded when it appeared that she would continue. He tried to focus on her words, but his mind was already racing several steps ahead. Would he kiss her? No, that'd be weird! They barely knew each other...

"I like…"

Micah waited expectantly, heart racing. He should kiss her.

"...Will."

Micah blinked, his face slowly falling.

"Well, I more than like him," Emily was saying. "I've more than liked him all through med school and I thought that I should tell him because I'm an adult and a doctor and that's what doctor adults do."

Micah couldn't explain why, but hearing this from the girl he'd only known for a few days was devastating. He was embarrassed at his confidence.

"And, uh, he rejected me..." Emily continued.

Micah found some vague hope in this, though it was well tempered.

"And I was…I AM embarrassed," she explained, "and I wanted him to think that I had moved on, so I told him that I liked...you."

What? He was a scape goat, the her: a beard! He was so far in the friend zone that she used him as an excuse! No one escapes the friend zone.

But wait, who said that? If his mom had a 10% chance of beating cancer, then certainly he had a 10% chance of escaping the friend zone. Someone had to beat the odds.

"...and that's what that was all about," Emily finished. "And I'm very sorry that I dragged you into that adolescent nightmare."

Micah put on his best friendly face. "You know that this means now? I'm going to have to spread a rumor that I shot you down."

Emily nodded, "I'm used to it."

Micah laughed. He was totally going to beat the odds.

...

Twenty-four hour shifts demanded the occasional nap. Will had not caught nearly enough shut-eye when his alarm woke him.

He opened his eyes to see Emily sleeping across from him. He had seen her sleeping before plenty of times, but this time he looked at her sadly, wondering if things would ever be the same between them again.

She looked so sweet laying there, untroubled by the drama and stress of life, relationships, and careers. He wished she could always be so serene. She would be unstoppable, Will thought, if she would just get out of her own way once in a while. He grinned at the thought of his friend finding the peace to achieve all her dreams. He wished very much that she would let him help.

But then, it was back: the newly-bricked wall between them. Will sighed and got up. This drama was getting old.

...

Emily hated the drama too. It was time to put an end to it. One of her patients had a tumor, one's heart was failing, Micah's mom had cancer! What was Emily doing freaking out about a stupid crush that she had.

-Nothing's big-she told herself.

"Hey, Cassandra?" Emily called suddenly, ready to be free of the rumor mill. Cassandra stopped and met her eyes. "I don't have a crush on Micah anymore, so if you could spread that around the hospital that would be great."

"Why would I spread it around?" Cassandra asked coyly.

-Oh please, girl!-Emily shouted in her mind-who else would have done it? Will?-

"Because you spread it around in the first place that I liked him," Emily said.

"No, I didn't," Cassandra insisted.

...

"Did you tell her?" Will asked when Cassandra told him about her encounter with Emily. "Did you tell her it was me? And that it was a complete accident?"

"No," Cassandra said. "I didn't throw you under the bus. She wouldn't believe me, anyway."

"Why not?" smiled Will.

"Well, I wouldn't believe her," she admitted. "Anyway, it doesn't matter. Even if I can't tease her about a crush, there's still plenty of ammunition. We're talking about Pits, after all."

"Hey," laughed Will, "remember, we're talking about my friend here."

"Are we?" Cassandra raised an eyebrow. "Seems like something weird has been going on."

"No, no, no,' he insisted. "Nothing...okay, yeah it's been weird. It think it's just...you know, the stress of this place. We're competing now and...you know, stuff like that."

"Look," Cassandra touched his arm and lingered. She measured his response and knew that he was interested. "You don't have to tell me. It can be a 'between friends' thing."

"That's..." he stammered, obviously distracted by her lingering hand. "That's probably for the best."

...

Micah didn't let his frustration affect his work. Sure he would have rather been with his mom during her first chemo treatment, but she had insisted that he leave to perform open heart surgery, and put in that perspective, it has seemed the obvious choice.

As they sewed Max back up, Dr. Bandari commented on their unlikely success.

"Someone has to beat the odds," he said, believing it more every minute.

"You did," she teased.

He laughed: "Yeah, no thanks to you!"

Micah washed his hands and arms, feeling on top of the world. That was the adrenaline, obviously, but also an exciting new sense of hope. Everything was going to be okay.

Bounding down the stairs to where his mother was sitting alone, he burst into the sitting room. Only...she wasn't alone.

There was Emily. Micah's heart skipped a beat.

The two were helping each other with a crossword puzzle, chatting and laughing like they had known each other for years. How could Emily do that?

"Hey you two," Micah announced himself, almost sorry to do it.

"Hey, honey," Joyce replied.

"You were off two hours ago," he said to Emily, hoping his voice stayed in control. "Why aren't you sleeping?"

Joyce inturrupted, giving Emily a stern look, "You didn't tell me you were off!"

"Ah," she waved a hand at his mom, "it wasn't important." Emily then looked Micah in the eye, "And I wasn't tired."

Emily looked back at crossword puzzle and Micah stared. He opened his mouth to say something, but what would it be? That he liked her? That he thought she was amazing? He barely knew her. He was her boss. Plus, and perhaps most importantly, his gossiping mother was right there. Truth be told, though, he was dumbstruck.

"Four down," Emily pointed out, "Oslo."

"Oslo, of course," Joyce wrote it in. "They always use Olso."

Micah was working up the courage to say something, ANYTHING, when she said, "On that note, I should be heading home."

"Absolutely honey," Joyce smiled. "Thanks for the company."

"Sure! Anytime!" Emily smiled. She looked at Micah and he was speechless once more. "Bye, Micah."

"See ya," he managed. He couldn't stop himself from watching as she walked off.

His mother cocked her head thoughtfully as he sat down in Emily's vacated seat. "She's cute," came the observation.

"I didn't notice," Micah said, gritting his teeth. The vague and uncontrollable things that made his heart beat out of time were not the kind of things he liked to talk about. Not out loud. "Now look, your session tomorrow is going to be slightly longer-"

"You didn't notice?" Joyce inquired, eyebrow raised.

"Stop changing the subject," Micah said uncomfortably.

"You're going to make me talk about cancer?"

-Ugh, why do moms have such power?-Micah wondered-Okay-

"No," he said. "I didn't notice."

"Then why'd she come up here?" Joyce asked sagely.

"Because," he attempted to explain, "she is the most caring and thoughtful person you will ever meet and she knew that I didn't want you to be alone."

"So you've told the hospital?"

"No," Micah answered carefully. "No...just Emily."

"Oh," his mom said with a wink. "Right. Because you 'didn't notice.'"

...

Will swung open the door to the roof only to find a brooding Emily already there.

"Sorry," he apologized, very uncomfortable to have found himself alone with her. "Tyra said there was good reception up here, so..."

"It's okay," Emily offered, clearly upset. "You can make your call."

Not being able to comfort his upset friend? Making a call and pretending that he didn't notice? That didn't sound like fun. "Nah, it's cool," he begged off. "I'll…you know…I'll come back."

"Okay, fine!" Emily blurted. "I'm not over you yet, okay?"

Will pivoted back. He had been dreading this moment, bur now that it was here, he felt relief also. maybe it was the twenty-four hour shift talking, but he was tired.

"But I am trying very hard!" she continued yelling. "But we're also both adults, so until that happens, you have to man up and deal with it!"

There was a strange comfort in her yelling. At least she wasn't lying to them both anymore. Their friendship had been built on the fact that they could tell each other anything. That she was willing to be honest with him was kind of a big deal.

"Man up, huh?" he teased.

"Yes," Emily demanded. "Please."

Even Will was shocked by how easy it was to let the awkwardness go. "Fair enough," he said, sauntering over to her and sitting on her right. "Emily," he finally let himself ask, "what's going on?"

The look she gave him told Will that their reconciliation was not a moment too soon. "I lost a patient today. I thought everything was fine, and I was about to leave, and there was her fiance', crying..." she sobbed. "And I know that it's going to get easier, and I know that it's only hitting me like this because it's the first time, but that doesn't make me feel any better, cause there's also something so sad about THAT!"

Will considered everything he knew about her. Emily, stop caring? Not possible.

"I don't think it will," he said.

"What?"

"Get easier for you," he explained. "I think you'll get better at hiding it, but…I don't think it will get easier for you."

"Don't tell Dr. Bandari that," Emily whined.

"You know Emily, you're a different kind of doctor than she is," Will said. He hesitated for only a moment, thinking that what he wanted to say might be the kind of thing she would read into. Screw it, he thought. "But for my money, if I were sick…I'd want you."

"You're supposed to be making me like you less, remember?" Emily laughed tearfully, expressing his own concerns. That she could joke about it made Will feel alright. This is what they did. They talked.

"Right okay," he pretended to be able to help with that. Who was he kidding: he knew he was lovable. She didn't stand a chance! "Yeah, no so you know, suck it up then and grow a pair?"

"Better," she nodded.

"Yeah, yeah," Will continued, ready to lighten the mood. "Oh! that whole love speech thing, by the way? Yeah, total proclamation."

"It was not!" she defended herself. "It was more of…I think an explanation."

Will scoffed: "Not even close!"

"A declaration?" Emily attempted.

"All that heavy breathing you were doing..."

"I was not heavy breathing!"

"A lot of heavy breathing going on," Will insisted, "which I think is the very definition of a proclamation, if I'm not mistaken."

"Okay, fine!" Emily gave in. "It was a stupid proclamation, okay?"

"Yeah," Will said, smiling.

"You happy?" she smiled back. This felt good.

...

Will had proceeded to tease Emily for several minutes before leaving to make his phone call. Taking out her phone, Emily decided to listen to his message from med school one last time. Of course she had kept it.

"Hey," said Will's recorded voice. "I had a great time tonight. I mean, of course I did. we always do, right? I was actually just thinking…I mean, what am I doing with these crazy girls? I should be with someone like you. Hey, maybe we should date. Man, I probably shouldn't have said that, right cause we're friends? Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow."

Emily thought still felt the lightness of his smile. She knew she was in a tough place. But getting over Will wasn't something she could do by avoidance. It would hurt for awhile.

Her finger hovered over the 'delete' button. She really ought to do it. It would be the first step in moving on-a promise to herself that there would be more to life than pining over a guy who would never feel the same.

Before she could over-think things, she plunged her finger towards the button. With a swift tap, the gears were set in motion. The message disappeared.

For an entire second, Emily felt immensely strong. Like an adult.

The next moment, she shook her phone violently. "No! No, no, no, no, no. No!"


	3. Chapter 3

Episode 3

There were few things in the world more sublime than a shirtless Will Collins. Well, a shirtless Will Collins with his arms around her, maybe, but barring that, shirtless and in sight was all Emily could really hope for. Of course, these were exactly the kinds of thoughts that she needed to STOP having if she had real chance of moving on...but who had that kind of self control.

-Focus on his flaws!-she told herself.

"Hey," she said, diving headfirst into her locker.

"Hey," he replied, not the tiniest bit embarrassed to have been seen half-naked. His lack of modesty was impressive.

Or...a fault. That's right, she was supposed to be finding the things that were wrong with him...like his sportiness and the inconsiderate way he changed where everyone had to see...and how he was way on the other side of the room...

Emily hovers at her locker door, trying not to feel disappointed as the top of his scrubs falls into place.

Noticing that she is staring, Will asks, "What time is it?"

Right, her watch-the reason she came in here. When she finally retrieved it she felt panic: "7:58!"

Will's eyes grew large and they made haste. They couldn't be late!

...

Cassandra had thought the days of competing against Emily Owens were long behind her. So how was it exactly that they ended up here? Dr. Bandari had announced a "pop quiz" the moment she walked up, which could only mean that some kind of contest was underway. Considering that Dr. Bandari didn't waste her time with interns, she could tell this was going to be big.

Each intern had been asked a technical question and, one by one, each had been eliminated. Each, that is, with the exception of Cassandra and her nemesis.

Cassandra had been doing well until she barely managed to answer a tricky question and she began to sweat. It didn't seem possible-Cassandra Kopelson, sweat? Cassandra Kopelson, lose? Absurd!

Now, Emily, there was a girl who sweat.

Of course! It was almost too obvious. That was how she had beaten Emily in the past. It was how she would beat her again:

"Pits, are you hot?" she asked just loud enough for her rival to hear.

Emily didn't turn, but she did shift on her feet.

Dr. Bandari shot off a question, but only Emily's heavy swallow could be heard. The silence dragged on. "Dr. Owens!" she reprimanded.

"I'm so sorry," Emily said, panicked, "could you repeat the question?"

Dr. Bandari's steely gaze turned towards Cassandra, who felt the excitement of her win. "Congratulations, Dr. kopelson, you'll be assisting on the next gallbladder that walks in."

She couldn't believe it! It was too good to be true! She had drilled the doctors in Denver Memorial for all the information they had-she had composed a list of things she had to do-in order to become the top intern. Top of the list was undeniably to make the first cut. It was a prestige, an hour, a triumph. And it was hers.

The interns were dismissed to the ER and they congratulated her as they left the room. Only one person's approval mattered, though.

"Wow, good going," Will applauded. "I thought she had you with that last one."

"Come on," Cassandra said, confidence restored, "I got this."

"Yeah," Will nodded. "Yeah, you really do."

...

"I'm telling you, if we play our cards right, this can be a natural birth," Dr. Hamata with her usual sideways smile.

"I'm sorry, but there's no way," Micah argued jovially. "Look how far she's progressed."

The two stood together examining the x-ray of a soon-to-be mother of twins.

"I know what you see," Dr. Hamata insisted, "but I do this-only this-for a living. So I know what I'm talking about."

"Well, we'll have to agree to disagree," Micah teased. Everything Kelly Hamata said was flirty, and the end result was that he flirted. "But you are so, completely wrong."

"Oh yeah?" she challenged. "You willing to stake something on your little (cough) wrong (cough) assessment?"

"That Mrs. Miller will need a Cesarean section?" Micah clarified.

"Yeah," Kelly stepped nearer. "Want to make it interesting?"

Micah swallowed loudly."What...ah...what does that entail?"

"No, no!" Kelly scolded. "You've got to agree to do it first."

Micah considered all the terrible things she might force him to do. Many an intern prank had begun in just this fashion.

"Oh, what are you, afraid?" she goaded. "Come on, I thought that surgeons were supposed to have balls-"

"No, I'm not afraid," Micah laughed. "And please, for the love of god, do not say 'balls' again. Fine, I'll do it. So, what are the stakes?"

"Uh-uh," Kelly shook her head. "You first."

"Okay..." Micah wracked his brain. "Um...okay, if I'm right...you have to wear a hat of my choosing for an entire week."

"Oh, come one," Kelly balked. "That's nothing!"

"'That's nothing' she says before she's even seen my mother's hat collection. I lived a childhood of utter embarrassment because of those hats-resulting in emotional scars that may never fully heal..." Micah said, eyebrow raised. Kelly flexed her jaw and squinted, nodding her approval. "So," Micah continued, "what'll it be?"

"I was thinking," Dr. Hamata stepped a bit closer, "if I win...you have to buy me dinner."

Micah was prepared for a lot of things, but this was not one of them.

"Are you asking me out?" he inquired, smiling.

"No, you're asking me out," Kelly said. "When I win."

"IF you win," Micah held up a hand.

"WHEN," she repeated. She stepped away and retrieved her clipboard. "You better buy some flowers."

With a final flirty smile, Kelly left the room. Micah, now alone, bit his lip, unsure of what had just happened.

...

"Pits," Cassandra ushered Emily into a section of the ER. Emily entered, cursing herself for answering to that name."Want to meet my gallbladder?"

"MY gallbladder, actually," said the man in the hospital bed.

His wife smiled and hit his arm playfully. Emily smiled at the older couple. Older couples were always so sweet-they had known each other forever, knew each others flaws, and still loved one another.

Cassandra leaned in and said in a low voice: "I heard the first intern to cut is considered the one to watch around here."

Emily, having forgotten about Cassandra's sabotage in the rush of her first ER shift, felt anger fill her.

"If you can live with the fact that you played dirty," Emily attempted to teach the demon shame.

It was a hopeless cause, however, as Cassandra smirked. "I definitely can."

...

Micah walked past the nurse's station as Emily was being yelled at. Again. He wondered if this might be Emily's default setting.

"I was just wondering if we could start over..." Emily said proceeding an apology.

"No," Dr. Bandari answered simply.

"No?" Micah could hear the heartbreak in Emily's voice.

"No," Dr. Bandari repeated. Without ceremony, she walked away.

"Don't worry," Micah said to the back of Emily's head. She turned. "She always picks on one of the interns. My first year was brutal."

"Really?" Emily's dejected face rose into one of hope, "She hated you too?"

"No, she loved me," Micah teased. "She hated Raquel, poor girl. She's up on the psych ward."

"As a resident?" Emily asked.

"No," he said, face serious, "patient."

Emily giggled uncomfortable and Micah tried to remain serious as he walked away. To his joy, she rushed up to him, terror peeking out at the edges of her words.

"Hey, you are kidding, right?" she called.

"Oh he is always kidding!" Kelly replied, walking up to them. "Dr. Barnes is our very own Patch Adams, isn't he? Here's your labs. She's hypertensive, but I need to keep those twins in there a little longer."

"Who's Patch Adams?" Micah asked, taking the file she offered. "And how much longer? If she gets any higher…"

"If, if, if!" Kelly returned. "IF she does, then we'll reevaluate. And like you haven't seen the movie."

"No, never." Micah examined Mrs. Miller's labs, "Even a little higher and we talk."

"I look forward to it," said Kelly with her sideways smile, "Patch."

Micah watched as Dr. Hamata retreated, feeling like she might swallow him up. How could such a tiny, adorable person be so...intimidating?

Micah turned to see Emily trying to hold in her laughter.

"Patch Adams was a goober," he said, responding to what he assumed was the cause of her merriment. "I'm nothing like him."

"I think she's got a crush on you," Emily said instead.

She had no idea! And he wasn't going to tell her. It seemed like a good idea to change the subject. What had they been talking about before?

"Don't stress about Dr. Bandari," he said seriously. "Just keep doing what you're doing."

"Alright," Emily nodded. She was not finished teasing: "…Patch!"

Micah barked his laughter. "Ohho," he pointed at her as he ran up the stairs. "Never call me that again! I'm your superior, that is a direct order!"

...

Cassandra was thrilled to be at the center of the hospital staff's attention. She was going to be the first intern to make a cut! After tomorrow she would be at the top. She felt poised on the edge of glory.

The only thing that could ruin it was-

Emily! In her patient's room! That sweaty, doe-eyed pain in my-

"Doctor, he's in a lot of pain," a woman was saying. "Can you give him something for it?"

"I'm his doctor," Cassandra pushed her way into the room. "I'd be happy to help your husband."

"Um," Emily stammered, "Ex-husband, she's the...new...wife."

That woman who looked like his daughter? Cassandra tried to hide her shock.

"Does he really need surgery?" asked the 'new' wife.

"Yes," Cassandra recovered, "but he is in excellent hands, I'll walk you through everything."

Seeing that Emily hadn't left yet, Cassandra turned and gave the quiet warning: "Stay away from my gallbladder."

...

"Was I right or was I right?" Kelly asked Micah as they washed their hands after surgery.

"Well, when you put it that way," Micah said, "I guess you were right. Which is too bad, because I was remembering this feathery get-up my mom used to wear: you would have died."

"Oh, please," Kelly smirked, "like you didn't want me to win. So, where are you taking me? Let me say first that I'm kind of a foodie. If it doesn't come with a paired wine, it's probably not worth eating."

Micah's eyebrows shot skyward. "Um, well..." What was it he had called her before? Intimidating?

"Hey, breathe, cowboy," she instructed. "I'm kidding."

"Yeah," Micah played along. "I knew that." They measured each other for a minute before, thankfully, his pager went off. Seeing it was from Emily, he said: "I have to take this, the gymnast we're treating needs to be tested for meningitis."

"Sure thing," Kelly nodded. "Another time."

Before long Micah had joined Tyra and Emily in Payson's room. She was turned on her side and a kit with a long needle was brought out. While he was instructing Tyra how to insert it, Emily kept careful track of the patient's mood.

"Payson," she said soothingly, "what is your best event?"

"My dad calls me the Queen of the Beam," the girl said shyly. Micah wanted to smile, but instead he continued to instruct Tyra.

"How wide is the balance beam?"

"Four inches," she squeaked. Micah knew this part of the test could be uncomfortable. He continued his lesson, trying to go as fast as good practice would allow.

"Think you could go through your routine on the beam?" Emily asked. Micah was amazed at this brilliant idea. "Just let me hear it."

"Mount, heal, step, turn..." recited Payson.

Micah let himself look over at Emily for a moment. She seemed almost too perfect to be real. Could a person really be so caring and selfless? The way she had gone to his mother during her chemo-did people really behave that way? Or were they mostly like Kelly-perfectly lovely but ultimately self-centered?

His eyes flickered back down to his work.

...

Cassandra didn't recognize the music that filled the OR. Music had never really been her forte (so to speak). The unfamiliarity of it played games with her already tense nerves.

It was finally happening. After countless hours of study and even more sutured oranges, the gallbladder surgery was finally happening.

Dr. Bandari glided into the room. "I love this part."

It only hurt Cassandra's nerves more that she didn't understand her idol's words. She attempted lamely: "the first cut?"

"The music," Dr. Bandari clarified. "The unexpected crescendo of it. All right, you ready Dr. Kopelson?"

"Absolutely," Cassandra insisted, trying to convince herself it was true. Carefully, she took up the scalpel, feeling the weight of it in her hand.

She moved her attention to Mr. Fischer's bare abdomen. It looked nothing like the oranges from last night-or even the cadavers from med school. It looked alive.

"Dr. Kopelson," Dr. Bandari urged.

"Yes," said Cassandra, "I'm fine."

She wasn't fine! Her entire view of herself as a medical genius had been built on the view of herself as the smartest and most able. But was she? Would she still have beaten Emily in the pop quiz if she hadn't cheated? Should it have been Emily standing here, knife in hand?

Cassandra's uncertainty caused her hand to shake. What if she wasn't good enough? What if the cut she made was too shallow or too deep? What if she punctured an organ and lost Bandari's good opinion forever?

"All right," Dr. Bandari sighed, pushing Cassandra quietly yet firmly out of the way. "Let's get this gallbladder out. I've got dinner reservation."

Cassandra had never felt so ashamed in her entire life. She backed up out of the way and fought back tears. In all of her nightmares, nothing quite this terrible had ever happened.

From the corner of her eye Cassandra spotted a person in the window. Almost dreading to learn who had witnessed her most pathetic moment, she slowly lifted her eyes to see Emily, who wore a pitying smile.

Cassandra felt her anger building up inside. What was she doing here?

...

Micah asked the nurse where Dr. Owens had gone, and she tipped her head towards the stairwell.

The stairwell again? He wondered, hopefully sans Ring Dings. He opened the door carefully, but found the landing empty.

There was instead a flash of motion and the sound of hurried footsteps from the level above.

"Emily?" Micah inquired.

"Micah?" the footsteps stopped. Emily's head appeared over the rail. "Is everything okay?"

Micah called up to her, "I was going to ask the same question."

"What?" Emily tried to catch her breath. "Oh, yeah. Emergency meeting on the roof. Patient frustration."

"Patient?" Micah wondered. "Can I help?"

"This boy is spreading an STD and is being a total jerk about an STD test...but Will seemed to have an idea," Emily shook her head distractedly. She very clearly wanted to be going on her way. "I still have a couple breaks to take, so I'm not skipping out or anything..."

"No," Micah said, slightly mortified that she was treated his desire to spend time with her as the demands of an overly attentive boss. Is that what he was to her? "No, that wasn't my concern."

"Is everything okay?" she called down. "It's just...I said I'd be there..."

For Will. For the guy that rejected her. Micah watched as she twitched nervously at the thought of keeping Will waiting.

"Yeah, sure," Micah said casually. If he thought about it, he couldn't remember why he was chasing her down to begin with. "It wasn't a big thing, I...I can get someone else."

Before he had finished talking, she was off again, rushing to meet the guy she was in love with.

...

Emily reached the roof with plenty of time to spare.

Will's delay was soon explained when he emerged from the door with a baseball bat in hand.

"Okay, now I'm, nervous," Emily took a few steps backwards. "Where'd the bat come from?"

"My car," he said.

"Road rage much?" she asked.

"No," he explained, "batting cages. When I'm pissed." Will grabbed a large pinecone from the roof, tossed it into the air, and hit it with all his strength. "I'm pissed."

Emily was somewhat taken aback. How did she not know that he had such a temper?

"Hey," Will's voice broke through her thoughts. She looked over to see him holding the bat out for her. "Your turn."

"Oh…." she considered it, "no."

"Oh, come one Owens," Will insisted, "give it a try. It'll make you feel better. I swear, come on."

Emily took the bat and Will handed her pine cone.

"Don't hurt yourself," was his offered advice.

Emily lifted the bat like a person who had a vague memory of how people should hold bats. Needless to say, she missed terribly.

"You gotta choke up on the bat," Will said.

-Was that supposed to help?-Emily wondered.

"By 'choke up,' I'm assuming you're not referring to a constricted airway?"

"Come here, I'll show you," Will said, approaching. Emily sucked in her breath. "Uh, unless it's going to be weird."

-Weird to have Will touching me?-Emily rolled eyes-Please! I have more self control than that!

"I'm not going to faint of anything!" she croaked. "If that's what you're asking."

"Fair enough,"he nods. "Alright."

As Will placed himself behind her, Emily began to doubt her assessment.

-Don't faint-she told herself.

He put his hands on her hands and guided her through the motions. Her skin tingled under his touch. She felt the sublime shift of his body. He spoke quiet instructions into her ear, and his warm breath tickled her neck. She felt she might swoon.

"Swing," he said, "do it again."

Emily was having trouble breathing as his instructions continued. His scent filled her senses, played games with her mind. When he moved behind her she could feel-

-No, those thoughts aren't helpful!-her logical brain screamed-god, what's wrong with me? I can't breathe!

"You know," Emily screeched with a quickness that revealed her awkwardness. "I think I've…got it."

"Yeah?" Will asked, stepping quickly back. "Alright, terrific."

"Yeah!" Emily nodded, not having head a word of his instructions.

"Now just, you know," Will reset to what they had been doing, "pretend like one of those pinecones is Damon's head. Idiot. Guy deserves more than a cut and a few bruised ribs."

Emily had completely forgotten about that twerp. He really did deserve more than a cut and a few bruised-"

Emily tossed a pinecone up and then let it fall, realization dawning.

"Owens," Will teased, "you got to at least look at the pinecone."

"He has bruised ribs!" Emily said excitedly. "Which means intake already took a urine sample to check for internal bleeding...and he's already given us permission to test it!"

Emily smiled as the realization dawned on him as well. They shared a look of triumph.

...

Micah breezed into the room alongside Kelly, shooting her a smile and saying: "You will never believe where I got reservations."

"Oh, look," Kelly stopped him, "I need to talk to you about that..."

"You didn't make other plans, did you?" Micah grinned.

"No," Kelly said, "but I wanted to say: I release you."

"You release me?" Micah laughed. "What, was it something I said?"

"No!" Kelly said. "It's just, 'he lost a bet' is not the kind of story you want to tell your grandkids."

"Grandkids?" Micah sputtered. "Don't you think that is...you know, thinking ahead?"

Kelly smiled indulgently. "Dr. Barnes, I work with babies all day. Is there another direction to think?"

Micah considered this. He shrugged, "I guess-"

"I'm sorry if I seem...aggressive..." Kelly apologized. "I just know that if I don't go after what I want, I'll always regret it."

"And you want-" Micah ducked his head to hide a blush. What was he doing focusing on a girl who was in love with someone else? Why not take a chance with the cute, brilliant, strong-willed woman who was actually interested? "Look, ah, I don't really care how this all began, but the fact is, I want to take you to dinner. If you need a story to tell people, tell them I said this: I stepped closer..." Micah took a step "...I melted your heart with my devastating charm..." he smiled at her "...and I asked what time I should pick you up? So...what time should I pick you up."

Kelly's face lit up. She shot him a flirty smile. "Seven."

"Seven it is," Micah nodded.

"How fancy is the restaurant?" Kelly inquired. "Should I borrow one of your mom's hats?"

Micah laughed, "How long have you known there were never any hats?"

"Come on," she said sweetly.

...

Will had been excited about Cassandra's first surgery all day. He had been looking for her everywhere to find out how it had gone. It was as though she had disappeared.

When he finally did see her, he exclaimed: "There you are! I was starting to think you'd left. How'd it go?"

"It was fine," she said shortly. "How is your-"

"'It was fine'?" Will cut in. "It was your first cut! That's a huge deal."

"Yes, and it was..." Cassandra hesitated, "...fine."

"Oh come on," he wouldn't let it drop. "There's got to be more to it than that."

"To what?" asked Tyra. She and Emily joined them.

"Her gallbladder," Will explained. "I want details."

Emily and Cassandra saw a look he didn't understand.

"I saw it," Emily offered. "She did great."

"I don't need your pity," Cassandra snapped in reply. She turned to look at Will: "I choked. My hands shook and I choked."

Cassandra rushed away, slamming into Emily's shoulder as she left.

Will's heart plummeted. He knew Cassandra must have been pretty upset to lash out like that. He regretted pushing her for info.

"I was just trying to be nice," Emily spread her arms in question.

"Yeah it's…" Will had followed Cassandra's retreat with his eyes. He didn't want her to be alone. "I'll go talk to her."

...

Micah greeted Emily and Tyra as he handed over the paperwork for his last patient of the day: "Good job today, you two."

"Oh, thank you," said Emily. She pivoted and then turned back, "Looks like the flirting has turned into stalking!"

Micah turned to see what she was talking about. Kelly stood where he'd told her to meet him, her coat in hand. She saw his gaze fall upon her and waved. He waved back.

Turning to his paperwork, he tried to sound casual. "No, not stalking," he explained, "waiting. We're going out. On a date."

The word "date" sounded awkward when he said it, but good. It felt good.

"Oh! Sorry!" Emily looked flustered. "I didn't, uh, I didn't know..."

"Well, we only just met, Dr. Owens," Micah chided. "You didn't really think you knew everything about me, did you?"

Emily let out an embarrassed laugh, "No I just meant…"

"Kidding," he said. He looked at her expectantly, maybe even a little hopefully. She didn't think he was the type to go on dates? Or she didn't think he ought to be going on dates that didn't include her?

She took a breath and nodded, "Have a great time."

And that was his answer. "Thank you," he said.

Micah began walking towards Kelly, stopped halfway, and turned back. He felt compelled to invite Emily instead-felt the almost undeniable urge to tell her how he felt right there in front of everyone. He felt he could almost ignore the fact that, even if she said yes, she would always drop him the moment Will called.

-On second thought, no-Micah thought-that's really not the kind of thing that should be ignored.

He shook his head and walked towards the radiantly smiling Kelly.

"You ready?" she asked.

"Quick stop at my locker and then we're out of here," he said. "I'm so ready."

...

"It's just never happened to me before," Cassandra said to Will in the dark break room. She had been hiding from him all day, but now that his warm eyes were upon her, she knew that everything would be alright.

"Well," he started, "You've never had your first time in surgery before."

That was the point! The first intern's cut would be the one that was remembered-not only by Dr. Bandari, which was bad enough, but by Cassandra. Failure. Forever.

"Not helping," she whined.

"Okay," Will sighed. "Look, you know what I wanted to be when I grew up? Pitcher. And it wasn't one of those silly childhood dreams, it was…I was good. Like, being scouted by teams good."

"...and modest," Cassandra said. He wasn't a baseball player anymore, so the story already seemed irrelevant.

"Nope, wasn't modest: just good." He shifted, "And then-I don't know if the pressure started to get to me or what-but I started choking. I couldn't get my fastball back. Just like that: no more phone calls."

-So, what-thought Cassandra-I should consider my surgical career over?-

"So, I had to figure something out because for the longest time it had just been baseball," Will said. "That's when I found medicine. Turned out to be a good thing. So...maybe this will turn out to be a good thing for you."

-Oh my god! Is he telling me to quit being a doctor?-Cassandra wondered, feeling disgusted and betrayed.

"Maybe you'll realize that you're better off..."

-What? Dead?-

"In baseball," Will concluded.

Cassandra couldn't help it: when she realize the whole story was to make the whole situation seem silly, a smile spread over her face.

"Or, you know," Will said for real this time, "maybe not to be so hard on yourself."

"Thanks," she nodded. He was right: her hand hadn't been shaking because she was incompetent-it had shaken because she had psyched herself out. Cassandra reached over and placed a hand on his muscular arm. Their eyes locked.

With a meaningful look, Will put his other hand on hers, running his thumb along her skin

"I can't believe you told me that story," Cassandra laughed. "Out of all the things you could say!"

"Come on," Will said, "you don't need inspirational stories, Cassandra. You already have all the tools you need to be an amazing Doctor. What you need to laugh."

"Luckily there's this funny, devastatingly hot guy who wants to oblige," Cassandra smirked.

"What," Will mocked surprise, "Little Lenny already cheered you up?"

Cassandra playfully punched his arm.

"Oh," he teased, "you meant me."

...

Emily knew that Cassandra was attracted to Will. It was clear enough in her snake-like eyes. What Emily didn't gamble on was that Will would feel the same.

As Emily watched Will place his hand on Cassandra's she felt the tears well up. As though it wasn't bad enough that the love of her life had rejected her, now he was interested in her greatest enemy?

-Think of his flaws!-Emily scolded herself, fighting to hold back her tears. She rushed from the window of the break room, mind filled with the image of those two getting close.

She couldn't think like that! Thinking like that was making her lightheaded. She had to think of his flaws.

-He's full of flaws-she insisted. She turned the corners of the hospital blindly, eyes too full of unspilled tears to see-and he's immature and sometimes he talks like a frat boy and he's THREE INCHES too tall, and he's glib-

No, counting the flaws of his personality were stupid. Nothing was that simple. Character flaws are things that one becomes accustomed to, not things that help one fall out of love!

-And oh, oh! here's another huge flaw-Emily's logical brain yelled-he rejected you! You poured out your heart and he rejected you. So just get over him already!-

Emily saw the woman in hallway in barely enough time to stop. She recognized the ex-Mrs. Fischer, the "old" wife of Cassandra's failed gallbladder patient.

"Hi," she said, gathering herself.

Mrs. Fischer seemed to be in the same state. "Oh hi," she said, wiping her eyes."

"Are you okay?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, no," she straightened herself up. "I think I'm allergic to something here in the hospital."

Emily followed the woman's gaze: Mr. Fischer was laying in his recovery bed, the "new wife" at his side. Emily had been amazed, earlier, at how the old and new had gotten along so well. Now she saw it for what it was: an amazingly difficult and brave act.

It wasn't possible for her to fall out of love with Will. Not even if he chose Cassandra. Her logical brain couldn't tell her heart what to feel.

"Yeah," Emily swallowed. "I think I have that same allergy."


	4. Chapter 4

Episode 4

As if the experience wasn't bad enough already, Emily's erratic running pace seemed to confuse the park's bikers just enough that a full half of them had to dodge out of her way. It seemed almost impossible that people could navigate this path without the near-death experiences she was having, but everyone else seemed to instinctually understand how to move through it gracefully.

Normally Emily didn't have the resolve to go running, but today she was driven by strong emotions: namely, hatred.

With a final burst of speed Emily caught sight of Will and Cassandra, jogging comfortably side by side.

Emily knew Cassandra was interested in Will. All the signs were there: the touching, the whispering, the lingering looks...

Emily put on a burst of speed, catching up to Will and Cassandra and wedging herself between them.

"You alright?" Will asked when he saw her.

"Great!" she lied.

"I'm not gonna lie, Pits," Cassandra called merrily, "you don't look so great."

"Ah, come on," Will helped, "she said it was her first day back."

"From the dead?" Cassandra teased.

Will laughed and Emily shot him a resentful look."

"Sorry," he said.

"The important thing is not that it's been a while since I've exercised," Emily insisted, "but that I'm exercising now."

"Agreed," Cassandra said in conclusion. "Let's race to the end!"

To Emily's horror, the other two took off at twice the speed. If anything could convince her to give up her quest, running was probably it. Who did this? Well, both Will AND Cassandra, which was the problem.

-Gut it out Owens-she insisted, picking up speed reluctantly.

...

"You went running just to keep them from being alone together?" Tyra asked, somewhat incredulous.

"No!" Emily said, clearly lying. "I went running because it's good for my health, which, as a doctor you should..."

Emily's attention shift to the end of the corridor, where Cassandra and Will were walking off together.

Tyra opened her mouth to say something, but Emily rushed off.

Before long the interns had been wrangled and were following Dr. Bandari. Cassandra volunteered immediately, shooting a meaningful look at Will. He returned her smile, but couldn't answer before Emily blurted, "Yeah, I'll do it."

Emily and Cassandra fell back and the group left them behind.

Tyra stops her, "You can't keep them apart forever."

"No, not forever!" Emily insisted hurriedly. "Just until he realizes that she's a predator."

"Will can take care of himself," Tyra pointed out.

"No," Emily explained, "he won't see it coming: she's camouflaged as a regular person."

With this, Emily followed in Cassandra's path,

"I know exactly why you volunteered, Pits," said Cassandra.

-Oh, god!-Emily panicked-how could she tell?-

"Don't look so surprised," Cassandra continued, "it's the same reason I did."

-What? Okay, she can't tell-Emily thought, relieved-just be cool-

"Look, we both want to be Gina's research assistant,"

Cassandra elaborated, "but for the sake of our patient we have to work together as a team. This isn't a competition. Okay?"

-yeah, right-Emily thought.

"Agreed," she said instead. Just then, Emily's pager went off. She looked at the unfamiliar name: "Do you know a Dr. Hamata?"

Cassandra didn't know her, but Emily was surprised to find that she did. It was Micah's 'stalker,' or more recently, his girlfriend, Kelly.

"Know how to do an ultrasound?" Kelly asked.

"Yeah!" Emily said. "Theoretically. I haven't…done one…but…"

Kelly turned to her with an amused smile.

...

"So, I'm helping with a patient of Kelly's," Emily said to Micah as they prepared a scanning machine.

"Yeah, she told me about that," Micah said briefly, uncomfortable talking about Kelly for some reason. "That was a good catch on the ultrasound."

"I guess," Emily replied sadly. "Though I would much rather both babies be okay instead of getting the credit for spotting a heart defect."

Micah nodded, touched by her selflessness, "Naturally, but if it needs to be spotted, then they're lucky to have you."

Emily smiled at him sweetly and his heart gave a slight flutter. He continued to glow as they directed their patient in. She laid down and before long they'd found her kidney the screen.

Micah talked her calmly through the procedure. When they'd finished, he said: "One biopsy down, one to go. How you doing, Amira?"

Their patient spoke up calmly, "A guy got hit by a train in While You Were Sleeping. He was in a Coma, This is not as bad as that. Plus the painkillers you gave me helped."

Micah had seen enough movies to know these references, though it seemed an interesting thing to judge one's feeling based on the lives of actors.

"You a movie buff?" he asked.

"Romantic comedies," she answered. "I love romantic comedies."

Micah looked at Emily, who was working diligently. He loved to watch at her working: to see the steadiness and confidence in her hands. Good hands were the marks of a great surgeon, and she had incredible hands...

But it was the way she connected with her patients too... He turned his attention back to doing the same for Amira.

"So, what's your favorite one?" he asked her.

"That's hard," she said, "maybe Love Actually? Or When Harry Met Sally. I love the way she orders off the menu."

Micah smiled at Emily, who looked oddly confused as she studied the image. "I don't…I don't see it," she said. "The kidney...I don't see it."

...

"How's your sandwich?" Cassandra asked Will as they ate

lunch together on the roof. "You're brave to eat from the vending machine."

"It's, you know," Will assessed, "awful. It's really, really bad. You say brave, but it may really be stupidity."

"Not at all," Cassandra winked, "because I got enough to share. I only have one set of chopsticks, though, so..."

Will smiled and opened his mouth. She popped some broccoli and rice in. He chewed, grinning at her all the while.

-He doesn't stand a chance-Cassandra thought.

"You know," said Will, "there's something I've been meaning to ask you."

Cassandra knew that tone of voice...and she liked it. "I hope I have a good answer for you."

"Me too!" Will let out his adorable nervous laugh. "Can I have some more of that?"

"Wait," Cassandra frowned, "was that your question?"

"No!" he called. "No, it's just, I get hungry when I'm nervous. You're not holding out on me, are you?"

She fed him. "So, Dr. Collins, I hope you're not nervous about me..."

-Was that a blush?-Cassandra wondered-he's totally worried about me. Is he finally going to ask me out?-

"Look," he said slowly, "I was wondering if you...you know..."

Before he could finish Emily burst out onto the roof.

-Bad timing as always, Pits-

"Test results," Emily said, out of breath. "Thyroid's normal."

"What is it then?" Cassandra got pulled back into the case.

"Well, I'll leave you guys to it," Will said, crumbling up the remains of his sandwich. "Got to get back to the floor."

Cassandra was sorry to watch him go, but rallied herself by checking out his backside. It was a good one-almost as good as the smile he shot her from the stairwell.

This man seemed too good to be true. In Cassandra's experience, this could mean one of two things: either he WAS too good to be true or he was one of those rare paragons who, once found, need to be quickly scooped up and held onto.

She returned his flirty look, knowing that she had him right where she wanted him. The gaze lingered until Emily's head came between them.

"I'm thinking dehydration," said Pits. With that Will was gone.

"Possible…" Cassandra thought, disappointed to have the most hansom doctor in the hospital replaced by Emily. Although, Emily was Will's best friend..."Hey, what was will like in med school?" Cassandra drilled. "Did he have any serious relationships?"

"No," Emily said quickly, "total commitment phobe."

This was not a problem. "Never met a commitment phobe who didn't profess his love for me."

Emily chuckled rudely. It took all of Cassandra's will to hold herself in check.

"It'd be pretty stupid, though," Emily went on, "to start a relationship with another intern, cause then if it doesn't work out-which it probably won't-it'll be pretty awkward, right?"

Cassandra thought about this while Emily shot off other ideas about the patient's condition. She imagined working with Will after she broke up with him (relationships didn't end without her ending them). It would certainly be awkward, but then, if he was who he seemed to be, there wouldn't have to be an end.

"...Pheochromocytoma?" Emily was saying. With the word, the patient's symptoms all made sense. Cassandra knew that Emily had figured it out. Ugh, EMILY had figured it out.

Cassandra had needed this. It had been long enough since her failed surgery to notice a difference in the way Gina Bandari was treating her. This case was supposed to put her back on top-redeem her from the shadow of failure.

Instead, Emily figured it out.

-No-Cassandra's scheming brain said-we're a team. WE figured it out. And SHE doesn't need the credit the way I do-

"Um, Gina ruled it out..." Cassandra lied. It was regrettable that getting to the top required the occasional back-stab. But, what the hell...it was only Emily.

...

Micah passed by Emily in the hallway, "Did we get kidney biopsy yet?" he asked.

"No," Emily said, "But I ordered it stat."

"If you really want stat you need to stand outside the laboratory and glare at the technicians," Micah explained. "And bring them Swiss Rolls. Those guys love Swiss Rolls. What's with the limp?"

Emily cursed that her blister-waddle was so noticeable. "I took up running," she said. "Swiss Rolls?"

"Yeah, works every time," Micah looked down at her feet. "Tell me you at least have good running shoes."

"I'm an intern," Emily said mournfully, "how am I supposed to afford them?"

Micah digs in his pocket and hands her money.

"For running shoes?" she asked, confused. They usually cost more than a few dollars.

"Nope, Swiss Rolls," he said, nodding to the vending machine. "I told you, we need Swiss Rolls."

...

"I heard about the...you know..." said Randy the intern to Cassandra,"the shaky hands."

Cassandra knew he was in love with her, which meant he wasn't trying to make her feel bad. That didn't stop her heart from dropping. It was bad enough that everyone knew...why did they have to keep bringing it up?

"You know, Randy..." Cassandra started sweetly, setting herself up to attack him ferociously and without warning. When Gina Bandari walked past, she held in her bitter words.

"Dr. Kopelson," Gina said in greeting, "how is it coming with my extra-credit patient?"

"Well, I was thinking," Cassandra rushed up alongside her. "Well, um, I was looking at the charts and it just popped into my head: pheochromocytoma."

Dr. Bandari arched her brow. "And you came up with this crazy theory on your own?"

"Well, I..." Cassandra faltered. If she was wrong, Gina would despise her more than she already did, but if she was right...If the gossip of her failed surgery had made it to Randy the intern, surely it was everywhere. Cassandra considered the diagnosis. It fit. It fit perfectly. "Yes."

"Ballsy," Dr. Bandari said in reply. "So, you think my patient has a pheochromocytoma?"

Cassandra nodded, feeling her spirits soar as Gina ordered the test and congratulated her on the tricky diagnosis. As she rushed away, Emily approached

"That was my idea!" Emily said, panicking.

"And this isn't a competition," Cassandra said in retort.

"You said she ruled it out!" Emily shrieked.

"Because I mixed up the cases I was working on," Cassandra said innocently. "It was an honest mistake."

It wasn't an honest mistake, but it was honestly important. It wasn't Cassandra's fault that Pits was so gullible.

...

Tyra had a limited attention span when it came to Emily's obsessive problems. Her ability to focus improved slightly when the conversation switched from Will to Cassandra. That girl was HOT. A jerk to the core, and painfully heterosexual, but still, fantasy worthy.

"I'm not going to let her under my skin," Emily was saying, clearly letting Cassandra under her skin.

Tyra rolled her eyes, "Good plan."

"...Because she's a bully and always has been," Emily went on.

"If you cared," Tyra pointed out, hoping Emily would catch her drift.

"Which I don't, exactly!" she said, missing the point. "Because I know exactly who she is, but Will doesn't. He thinks that she's funny and delightfully blunt-"

"And ridiculously hot," Tyra said under her breath.

"He needs to see her evil core," Emily ranted.

Tyra couldn't take it any more-her attention was up. She walked ahead to block Emily's path. "Why not just tell Will not to date Cassandra?"

"No!" Emily balked. "I can't, cause he'll think its because I like him."

"Which you do," Tyra reminded.

"Yeah..." Emily admitted, "but that's beside the point. This has nothing to do with me. I'm trying to protect HIM."

From behind her, Tyra heard Cassandra offer to bring reports down to Dr. Collins. Tyra considered what she should tell her friend-some gentle way to say "get over it," but when Tyra turned back around, Emily was gone.

...

Emily knew the stairs were faster than the elevator. She also knew that the third floor would be less busy, and so she should cross the hallway there. She felt immensely satisfied to reach the room where Will was talking to a patient before Cassandra walked up moments later.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her smug smile falling.

"I…uh," Emily gasped, trying to sound casual, "I had a question for Will. What are you doing here?"

"I have his path report," said Cassandra, not the least bit amused, "and you clearly just ran here. Why are you stalking us? Are you scared I'm gonna date your friend?"

-Scared?-Emily laughed to herself-Could you be making a bigger understatement?-

"No..." she said unconvincingly.

"You should be," Cassandra smirked. "I'm GOING TO date your friend."

"That's pretty confident," Emily said, crossing her arms.

"Not pretty confident," Cassandra disagreed. "Pretty AND confident."

Just then, Will emerged from the room. Emily was hurt to see both his face lighting up when he saw her nemesis, and fall when he spied her there too.

"Everything okay?" He asked, concerned.

"Yeah, great," Emily offered.

"Picked up your path report," said Cassandra, offering it to him. He tried to take it from her, but at the last moment she held on. "Might ask you a favor at some point," she said.

-Ugh! Those eyes!-Emily's brain screamed-it's like she's daring him to ask her out in front of me!-

...

Will had certainly gotten this sense, though he knew of all the people to submit to his proposal to Cassandra, Emily was by far the worst choice. It was an awkward enough experience to be trapped in an elevator with the both of them-their dislike of each other was apparent to all. Will worried what would happen when he finally got around to asking Cassandra out. He was pretty sure she would say yes...Her feelings for him seemed pretty clear.

Will was amazingly excited. This girl was exciting. She was smart and driven and funny. She liked all the things he liked. Well, except Emily. That she and Emily hated one another was the only real flaw he could find. He caulked it up to the different kind of rivalry that existed between girls. The stakes were high, after all, which meant that tensions were high.

Still, he felt guilty about what he planned to do.

Will spotted Emily and quickly made up his mind to say something to her. He so desperately wanted to spare her feelings.

"Hey," he called, "you got a second?"

"Sure," Emily said.

"Okay," Will looked around to make sure Cassandra wasn't watching and guided Emily gentle under the stairs.

"Everything okay?" Emily asked, sounding mildly afraid.

"Huh?" Will hadn't even thought he was acting strangely. He added quickly, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just, you know, wanted to talk to you about something. I wasn't sure I was going to say something-it's actually kind of weird-and then I thought, 'well, if I don't say something, THAT would be weird,' you know?" he cursed himself for mumbling. "So, of the two options, weird and weird, I'm going with weird."

He gathered himself. To be honest, this was worse than the trying to tell Emily that he wasn't into her. This time he was saying that he wasn't into her AND...

"It's about Cassandra," he plowed ahead. "The thing is, the two of us have been, I don't know, um...flirting? But I know that you two have your whole competitive thing...and after you told me about how you feel...I just wanted to make sure you'd be okay…if I asked her out."

Will hadn't known what to expect-halfway through his rambling he had realized that this may have been a terrible plan. What would he do if she said no?

To his great surprise, Emily looked completely nonplussed.

"Yeah," she said coolly. "Totally."

"Cool!" Will said, relieved and somewhat surprised. "I mean, I had to ask, right? Because our friendship is really important, and I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable."

"Uncomfortable?" Emily repeated. "No."

Will nodded, pleasantly surprised. Maybe Emily really was over him.

-Or maybe she's hiding what she really feels, like usual-his thoughts snuck in-and I just want to believe the lie-

...

"I don't suppose you have anything here about a nerdy girl who wins the guy of her dreams?" Emily asked the librarian who was restoring the hospital's movie selection to order. "Ideally one where she completely crushes the 'hot' girl in the process?"

"Has Amira already run through the first batch you got her?" Micah's cut in. The Librarian moved away, relieved.

"Well, yes," Emily said, going back to browsing on her own, "but I might need a little pick-me-up too."

"Uh-oh," Micah smiled. "Hospital drama weighing on you today?"

"As usual," Emily said reluctantly. "It's just...ugh, never mind."

"Come on, Dr. Owens," Micah insisted, crossing his arms. "You know you can talk to me. I won't judge. Well, not to your face, anyway."

"I know you won't, you're, like, the coolest guy here," she said. "It's just...I'm just being stupid."

"I don't think that's possible," Micah said, his heart doing cartwheels. He quickly added, "Come on, don't hold out on me. What's got your stethoscope in a knot these days?"

"Ugh, okay, it's Cassandra," Emily blurted. "It's just that...she's winning...at everything."

"'Winning?'" Micah echoed. "I mean, she's smart and all, but how on earth do you think she could beat you?" He quickly added, feeling uncomfortable: "At everything? How do you think she could beat you at everything. That's a lot of things. I mean, I bet you haven't even tried sky diving."

"No..." she said thoughtfully, giving the hint of a smile. "No, and I would definitely be better than her at that."

"Look," Micah said seriously, "what is it that she's 'winning' at? And how can I help?"

"Micah..." Emily pleaded.

"Come on, Owens," he ordered, "these problems aren't going to solve themselves."

"Okay, fine!" she laughed. "She's winning at...being the first intern selected for surgery-even if she didn't do it, she was still selected-and she's winning at being Dr. Bandari's top choice for research assistant..."

Emily started listing things. Micah mostly heard the first. Emily hadn't made her first cut yet, but none of the other interns had either. There was no reason she had to wait for Gina to select her for it. Micah could make that happen...

"...She's winning at making EVERYONE fall in love with her, despite the fact that she's secretly a cold-blooded monster," Emily cried, now fully worked up. "And she's winning...with Will. She's winning with Will. He wants to ask her out and I don't understand why he doesn't see that she's awful!"

Oh, right. Will. Micah supposed he had no reason to be upset about Emily's unrequited love. He was, after all, in his own relationship. What did that make him, exactly? A friend, he supposed.

"We can't always see the things that are right in front of us," Micah said knowingly. "Maybe you see something he doesn't. Now, you could warn him about it, but even so, it wouldn't make a difference. You have to let people make their own mistakes. Sometimes they're just not ready to see what you see."

"Thanks for not saying that I'm making it up," Emily sniffled.

"Well, yeah," Micah nodded, teasing, "that's also a possibility."

"What?" Emily squealed, punching him playfully on the arm.

"Hey, ow!" He laughed. "Don't ask if you don't want to head it! Also: kidding."

Emily nodded. "So what are you doing down here anyway?"

"Browsing also," he said. "I told Amira I'd never see When Harry Met Sally, and she insisted I find a copy right away. I though it might be fun for me and...for me and Kelly to watch tonight." Micah didn't know why he found that hard to say.

Emily nodded again. "That's nice. Highly recommended."

...

"He asked you," said Tyra, changing into new scrubs. "You could have said no."

Emily sat on the bench, brooding.

"How?" she demanded. "That would have been so awkward."

Tyra rolled her eyes. As if anything about Emily WASN'T awkward.

"We're just getting back to being friends," Emily continued. "Ugh! Why can't he see Cassandra for who she really is?"

Tyra though her friend was missing the point. Will would never see Cassandra the way Emily did. He was a heterosexual male. His heart was not in his chest-it was in his pants.

"Hot?" she tried to bluntly explain again.

"No," Emily insisted, "Selfish!

...

If Cassandra was the most selfish person in the world, Amira's husband was the least.

"I'm giving her my kidney," he insisted, even after being rejected by her with a "I'm just not that into you."

"Okay, we need to get you checked in right away."

Amira's in-laws leave the room after her bed, but Micah stopped Emily at the door.

"You think you can stand on those feet for the next four hours?" he asked.

"Yeah, why?" she asked in return.

"You're going to make your first cut," he explained, grinning at her.

Emily stood, stunned.

...

Micah remembered his first cut. That was kind of the point. Emily deserved to be the first intern to do so, and wanted to be right there next to her in the memory. He wanted to be her first.

He stood behind her nervously, waiting to help tie her surgical gown. Unable to help himself, he stared at the bared nape of her neck-watched as her shoulders moved gently as she breathed.

"You okay?" he asked quietly, still gazing at her intently.

Emily cleared her throat, "Yeah, yeah. I just…I didn't expect it to be today. I thought I would…I thought I would know in advance and have some time to think about it..."

Emily pushed the surgical gown over her arms and shoulders and Micah reached for the ties. He supposed that undressing a person was considered the ultimate erotic gesture, but there was something about tying the string behind Emily's back...he fought to keep him fingers from shaking. He felt a light sweat on his forehead.

"That's why I didn't tell you in advance," he encouraged, trying to focus.

"Are you implying that I over-think?"

Micah smiled. "You're over-thinking."

He finished with the ties and she turned around. Now was the time for the words of wisdom. "I'm nervous every single time I go in there," he said. "I think if you're not nervous, then you're doing something wrong."

Emily nodded, clearly a nervous wreck. Side by side, they stepped towards the operating room.

Emily slowly approached the table, putting her hands on their patient's exposed abdomen.

"Ready, Dr. Owens?" Micah asked. They locked eyes.

She nodded, slowly taking the offered scalpel. Micah watched her intently, knowing how nervous she must be-remembering how all he had heard before his first cut was the beat of his own heart. Her knife hovers above the skin, but Micah has no doubts. This is what they were both born to do.

Before he expected, Emily placed the scalpel and applied pressure. Blood began to flow.

"Suction," she commanded, then tossed a quick glance at Micah, expecting him to take over.

That was the normal way of an intern's first cut, but Micah didn't want anything normal for Emily. "Continue," he instructed.

And so she did. Without preparation and without any doubts, Emily continued the procedure as though she had been doing it all her life. He had no doubts.

"Looking good, Dr. Owens," Micah said as she cauterized the wound. "Verging on ballsy, even."

"I've never been called ballsy in my life," Emily said.

"It's a day of firsts," Micah said happily.

...

Cassandra had been avoiding everyone she knew. She did this by a combination of hiding in her own secret places and being overly attentive to her patients. Word of Emily's brazen success in the operating room was already spread far and wide. Without using tactical maneuvers, Cassandra would have heard about nothing else.

It hurt all the more because she had watched Emily through the OR window. Not only had Emily barely hesitated before going in for the cut, but had continued past this first milestone. How could Cassandra ever come close to that?

"Can you page me and only me when the sampling comes back for the patient in 531?" Cassandra begged, knowing she had to try.

"I already got it," said Emily from the other side of station.

"Oh," said Cassandra, feeling somewhat guilty being caught. "How do you have them, they're not due for another two hours."

"Mmm," Emily shrugged. She pushed a piece of chocolate into her mouth and offered her another. "Swiss Roll?"

"No!" Cassandra exclaimed, disgusted. "What do the results say?" She approached and grabbed for the folder, but Emily pulled it back. "It's my patient too, let me see."

Emily continued eating the roll. "Would you have shown them to me?"

Cassandra knew she wouldn't be able to lie convincingly about that. "No," she admitted.

"So why should I show them to you?"

Cassandra hated to be put in the weak position. She hated more than Emily was, as a result, put in power. She had to get those test results. If Emily made her first cut AND diagnosed a tricky patient in one day, Cassandra's medical career might as well be over.

Knowing it could only work once, Cassandra pulled out her big guns. She channeled a place deep inside of her-a place she would normally deny the existence of: "Because…my hand shook. I was in surgery and my hand shook...and when Gina sees me now, that's what she thinks: I might not be cut out for this," Cassandra admitted, on the edge of tears. "I don't know what it is about you, but I just get…I just get really…insecure."

Cassandra assessed Emily's face as she said this. She knew that Emily was gullible. The trick was to tell the truth. No lie could succeed unless it was at least 90% true.

"Whatever…um," Cassandra continued. "It was wrong to take credit for your idea...and I'm sorry. Can I have a tissue?"

Emily turns to get one, and Cassandra snatched the test results. By the time Emily turns back around, she was sniffling into her hand once more.

"Thanks," she motioned to the tissue. "Um, anyway…you should give the results to Dr. Bandari. You deserve it." Her only regret, walking away, was that she didn't get to see Emily's face when she opened the folder to find it empty.

"You are that threatened by me?" came the reaction later when an out-of-breath Emily ran up just in time to see Cassandra being praised by their idol.

"Grow up!" Cassandra finally felt ready to channel her jealous energy. "This has nothing to do with you. This is the real world and everything counts. Only one of us is going to be Gina's research assistant, and you're just collateral damage."

This was another 90% truth. If there had to be collateral damage, Cassandra had every intention of having it be upon Pits.

...

"Anyone but Cassandra," Emily told Will as he got ready to leave. "You asked how I felt out you dating her: that's how I feel. Date anyone in the world except for Cassandra."

Will balked at this. "Wait a minute-"

"No, Will," Emily interrupted. "She is awful! She always has been!"

"People change," Will defended. Cassandra may have seemed a little rough around the edges, but only with Emily, really...

"No," Emily insisted. "She hasn't! Just trust me, it's for your own good."

"I don't need you protecting me, okay?" Will said resentfully. "I can handle it."

"I can't!" Emily shouted in clarification, "...Handle it. I just can't."

"This doesn't seem right," Will said, thinking about his plans to take her to dinner. "Emily, you can't tell me who to date."

"You asked," she pointed out.

"I was trying to be a good guy."

"Then be a good guy," Emily scolded. "ANYONE…except for her."

Will fought his instinct to refuse immediately. He was reacting passionately, he knew, and realized that the consequences to reacting out of passion were often non-reversible.

"I'll think about it," he told her. It was the best he could do. Somewhat angry, he left the room.

...

"Are you doing anything fun tonight, doc?" nurse Tammy asked Kelly Hamata.

"You know, I think something came up," she answered. "That intern that helped out with the twins and the crazy biological mother. Sweet girl."

"I'd look out for her," said nurse Diane, coming up from behind. "I was in surgery with she and your beau, and they seemed pretty close."

"I'm sure he's very...attentive with his interns," Kelly said, frowning slightly.

"It was more than that." Diane insisted, rummaging through her paperwork. "I've assisted enough to know the difference between a look and a lingering look."

"No you haven't," said Tammy. She touched Kelly's hand protectively. "No she doesn't. It's all masks and eye shields. You can't see anything."

"Have it your way," Diane shrugged. "But don't say I didn't warn you."

"You can't see anything," Tammy repeated.

Kelly thought back to times when she'd flirted with her eyes during surgery. Had she been able to tell, or was it what she had wanted to see? "No, of course not," she said.

"Anyway," Tammy said, "you take that cute surgeon to a bar, get him drunk, and get him dancing. You'll see how long he makes eyes at anyone but you!"

Kelly regretted staying long enough to hear that last part.

...

"You would not believe the day I'm having," Cassandra complained to Will as she fell into line with him walking down the hallway.

Will felt a strong urge to answer, but he held it in. He hadn't had the chance to think yet.

"Hope you're day was better," Cassandra tried again, sounding confused. "How did the-"

"You know, Cassandra," Will interrupted. "I'm no feeling well, do you mind if we do this later?"

"What?" she said abruptly. "Talk about the day?"

"Yeah," he answered. "Tired."

Will's words surprised even him. Was that it, then? Had he made his choice? Was it friendship winning over the charms of a really, really, really hot girl?

"Maybe we could grab some dinner and help each other recover," Cassandra made another attempt. "You know, I give a killer massage."

"Uh, right, look..." Will considered what he should say. That he wanted to do that with all his being but that he had promised not to? "I promised to go to the bar. You know, celebrate Emily's first cut and all."

"I..I mean, I could meet you there," Cassandra offered. "Hey, they have killer hot wings, right? Want to split-"

"I changed my mind," Will interrupted again. "I can't go out. I'll have a drink with her another time. I'm just...so tired. I'm just gonna go crash."

"Oh," Cassandra looked away from him, "okay. I guess...I'll see you tomorrow, then?"

"Yeah," Will said vaguely, "maybe."

He saw Cassandra's devastated look before he turned away and felt like her was going to be sick. How could this be the right decision when it made him feel so terrible? He imagined walking away from Emily with the same face-imaged if Emily was so upset that she never spoke to him again. Okay, it was the right choice, but still amazingly unfair.

...

Emily sat at the bar with Micah after their shift had ended. "It's hospital protocol," he said. "Denver Memorial tradition: drink with your colleagues after your first cut."

From behind him Dr. Bandari ordered drink. Emily can tell this is impressive by Micah's reaction. Maybe that meant she had forgiven Emily for her first few foibles?

"Heard you did well in the OR, Dr. Owens," she said briefly.

"Yes…" Emily said carefully. She didn't know the protocol for answering and her brain wen into immediate overdrive."I did, thank you…and thank you for coming, I really…."

Dr. Bandari had aleadry walked away.

"...appreciate it," she finished, looking sadly at Micah.

"Don't over-think it," he advised. "Cheers!"

Kelly pushed her way between them. "Hey, he tell you all about the tradition?"

"Mmm," Micah shook his head. "I was just getting to that part."

"What part?" Emily asked apprehensively.

"First cut pays first round…" Kelly said, somewhat tipsy already.

"Oh…" Emily said, somewhat terrified. Kelly handed her the bill. "Okay..."

"Let's dance," Kelly said, turning to Micah.

"There's no one dancing," he said, embarrassed.

"...Yet..." she smiled.

"I don't dance," he insisted.

"I've seen you!"

"I don't dance in public," he tried, but Kelly pulled him out. "I don't..." Emily heard as he trailed away.

Emily turned to watch as they walked off, arms around one another. They were cute together. The way his arm wrapped around her was really sweet...

Emily turned around, feeling slightly sad. She wished she had someone in her life like Micah-like, romantically in her life. He was sweet and funny and adorable. Ah well, she supposed she would have to learn to love the sad reality of the twisted romance with a guy who would never reciprocate-

-Holy Jesus, is that the bill?!-Emily felt panic upon seeing what she now owed the bar. Before she could start hyperventilating, Will came to sit next to her.

"Okay," he said. "I won't ask her out. You and I just got back on track and that's more important, so…"

He trailed off, looking wretched. Emily felt her heart settle slightly. "Thank you."

"Yeah," he said with a touch of resentment. "Just so you know, high school wasn't the greatest time for me either."

"My house was TP'd once a week," Emily said without hesitation.

Will smiled, "You win." Then his smile abruptly disappeared. He looked haunted. Emily followed his gaze to see Cassandra. With a devastated look, she left the bar.

"I blew her off earlier, so…" Will let his words trail off. They drank silently.

"So, um," Emily wondered aloud, "how cold do you think it gets around here? Because after I pay this bill I'm going to have to make some serious cuts in my lifestyle. I'm thinking maybe the heat."

"What about food?" Will asked. "You don't need that."

"I don't?" Emily asked. "Um, Dr. Collins, perhaps you weren't paying attention the day they taught this, but the study of medicine clearly shows that-"

"No, think about it," Will said. "There's plenty to eat at work if you're not too picky...forgotten left-overs, the bags you can nab from the bottom row of the vending machine, an impressive variety of condiments..."

Emily laughed, "Anything I can beg from you with a liberal application of puppy-dog eyes..."

"Oh!" said Will. "Let's not forget the medical waste from-"

"Ugh!" Emily squealed. "Too far!"

"Can't take it?" Will asked. "I guess you'll just have to give up heat then."

"Yeah, I guess so," she said, accepting her fate. She touched his arm. "Really, Will, thank you."

He squeezed her hand quickly and returned to his beer. "Come on, Emily. I'll always choose you."

She nodded. She had won, so it seemed. So why didn't she feel good about it?


	5. Chapter 5

Episode 5

"You should have told me you'd changed your mind about going to the bar," Cassandra said. "At first I thought you were trying to blow me off, but of course you wouldn't miss Emily's big...thing."

"Um, right," Will said, his worst nightmare coming true. He had hoped to simply avoid Cassandra until she took the hint, but she was determined. It was one of the things he liked about her...

-Ugh!-Will thought-stop with the thoughts!-

"You know," he said, trying not to make eye contact. "I've got to...got to go, so...yeah."

"Right," Cassandra agreed. "Wait, Will. I don't understand. Are we okay?"

"Yeah," Will said unconvincingly. "Of course we're fine. Why wouldn't we be?"

"I don't know," Cassandra whined. "But you've seemed really...distant."

"I don't know what you're talking about," he lied. He turned to leave.

"Are you angry with me?" Cassandra yelled after him.

"No!" he shouted back, louder than he intended.

Will tried to think of something to say that would make Cassandra feel better, but he couldn't think of a thing. For some reason, "my best friend demanded I stay away from you," didn't seem like the best idea.

"I just...I really have to go."

...

"Joyce, what are you doing here?" Emily asked, spying Micah's mom in the lobby.

"Oh nothing," she said, "just a CT scan."

"Oh my," Emily raised her brows. "That's big."

"Ugh, don't remind me," Joyce groaned. "But, you know, Micah seems so sure...I've decided not to worry."

"That's good," Emily said. "Why worry until it's time, right? Plus, worrying is bad for your health."

Joyce nodded sagely. "So, how are you these days, dear?"

"Ah, well," Emily thought. A scrape she'd had in the parking lot popped immediately to mind. "You know, hospital drama, guilt-ridden decisions, minor car accidents...that sort of thing..."

"You seem okay," Joyce observed. "What kind of accident?"

"Just a tiny, TINY scratch!" Emily rolled her eyes. "But of course, I fell AWFUL, so I left a note."

"We make quite the pair, don't we?" Joyce squeezed Emily's arm and smiled. "How does that phrase go: women can't have it all?"

Emily shook her head and laughed, "I tell you, there are times when I wish I had a little less!"

Joyce laughed too, "Oh, aren't you funny! It's true, there are definitely things we can check off our lists today!"

"How many women can say that?" Emily roared.

"Like cancer!" Joyce threw her head back in mirth.

"And car accidents!"

"What's so funny?" Micah asked, walking up to them.

Emily fought to calm down. She and Joyce tried to explain, but Micah was clearly tense.

"We were thinking that we kind of had it all," Emily said in summation.

"Cancer," Joyce repeated.

"Car accident," said Emily.

Micah turned to his mother: "You were in a car accident?!"

"No, no," Joyce said, somewhat taken aback by Micah's intensity. "E-Emily was."

"Yeah," Emily shrugged. "Just a little one."

"She left a note because she's a good girl," Joyce shot her a smile.

"I'm a guilt-ridden girl," Emily said.

Micah was both annoyed and humored. "Would this be a good time to take my mom to her extremely important CT scan? Because I could always come back if you two need more time to chitchat."

"Did he just say 'chitchat'?" Joyce looked offended.

"Male chauvinist pig," Emily agreed.

"You're gonna by late for rounds," Micah told Emily, effectively winning the argument.

"I'll come see you later, Joyce," she said, walking off.

Micah followed her to the elevator, "Hey, so, actually I wanted to put you on my mom's case today," he said.

"Great," she teased. "Give us more time to chitchat."

"Hey," Micah smiled despite his nerves, "you guys can't gang up on me, right?"

"No," Emily sighed. "We'll chitchat about it later."

...

"Is Monocle spelled with an O or an A?" asked the young patient Sammy, who played Scrabble with his sister.

"An O," Dr. Bandari offered reluctantly.

Will watched the brother and sister tease each other over the spelling of the word and remembered the word game he and Emily used to play. He leaned over and whispered to Emily: "Loquastic."

"Still not a word," she insisted. He stood back up and smiled, though he caught sight of Cassandra and his smile fell.

It was hard to look at her. Cassandra was already beautiful and alluring, but being told to look at anyone BUT her had the usual effect of making him uninterested in anything else. He didn't want to outright REJECT her, though. He didn't think he could tell a lie that big.

Dr. Bandari handed the case file to Will and Emily with the instructions to take blood sampled and the other interns departed.

Will was pleased to find that Emily was thinking about his earlier reference when she said, "I used to play Bananagrams with my friend in med school. We had this epic fight about the word 'loquastic.'"

"Is that a word?" Sammy asked.

"No," Emily said.

"Yeah," he replied.

"It's definitely not a word," Emily tried again, giving Sammy a definite look.

"Definitely a word," Will continued.

"What do you think," Emily asked their patients, "loquastic?

"Is it in the dictionary?" the boy asked.

"We play no dictionaries allowed," Emily explained.

"Not a word," he concluded.

Emily gave Will and "I don't you so" look. He smiled, though somewhat resentfully.

"See?" she said to the room. "I knew I liked you."

...

"You're so lucky you've got the kid with the liver transplant, Emily," Cassandra prattled, trying to butter up her foe. "But I mean, you like totally deserve it. You're so great with kids."

"What's up, Cassandra?" Emily asked, not fooled. "Why are you being nice?"

"What? Oh fine," Cassandra dropped the act. She should have known it would work on Pits. "I need a favor. Something bizarre is happening with Will. Everything was great: he was obviously really into me, and then, out of the blue, he just started blowing me off."

"Wow," Emily said, "that is really bizarre."

"Right?" Cassandra breathed. She hated that it had come to this. "You're his friend, did he say anything to you?"

"No," Emily said, "no, not a thing. Absolutely nothing.

Cassandra knew there had to be more to it than that. Emily was the queen of the over-sell. Before she could say anything, Emily's beeper went off.

"I have to get this," she said, moving towards the elevator.

"Could you ask him what happened?" asked quickly.

Emily hit the elevator button. "I'd really rather not get involved."

"Please!" Cassandra begged, loathing herself but know Will was worth it. "It doesn't make any sense! I keep going over what happened-if I did anything..."

"Cassandra," Emily said suddenly, "do you like my shoes?"

"No," Cassandra replied, confused, "they're awful, why?"

"No reason," Emily said. "Thank you. And like I said, I just don't want to get involved."

Cassandra squinted her eyes as the elevator doors closed. Something strange was going on here, and no one played games better than her.

...

Micah listened to the specialist as he explained what he saw in his mother's scans. Emily stood behind them taking notes.

"Here in the axial cross section we see that the tumor remains at 42 millimeters," the specialist concluded.

Micah felt his heart sink, "So it hasn't shrunk at all?"

"No."

This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be happening! These were not the right results for someone who was going to beat the odds. But that didn't mean...that didn't mean it was over! He wracked his manic brain for the other options-the other things that could be done.

"Okay, well," he said, his body numb, "we're just going to have to get more aggressive."

The specialist looked around at Emily for support, "Well, we can try…"

"Good," he said, as if it was obvious. "Let's do it."

All Micah could hear was the blood pumping through his veins. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. Several rounds of chemo should have shrunk the tumor, if only a little bit. There should have been SOMETHING! The air seemed impossibly hot-each breath burned in his lungs. How was he supposed to tell his own mother that she was going to die? What sick twist of fate had decided he should get that job?

Knowing he was about to break down, Micah rushed from the room.

"Hey," Emily asked gently, following behind him. "Are you okay?"

"Me?" he asked, as if her question was absurd. "Yeah."

"Because if you wanted to…"

-What, talk?-Micah thought-I'd rather curl up in a ball and die-

"No," he said, leaving her in the dust. "I'm fine."

...

"I just can't believe he's not the father," Emily marveled to Will sometime later. It seemed to her to be a day of bad news.

"He is the father," Will corrected. "He raised Sammy-they love each other."

"You know what I mean," Emily went on, "the biological father."

"Yeah, I know," Will shook his head. "Of all the things that could happen to this family..."

"...they really don't need this," she agreed.

"Well, look," Will said to her, "I think I should be the one to tell them. You have this 'I'm-about-to-break-bad-news face' that might freak them out."

"What?" Emily snorted. "No I don't! And I don't think we should tell them."

"You don't think that's something he has the right to know?" Will asked.

"Well, maybe," Emily said, choosing not to decide. "But not at our whim. And what do you mean I have a break-bad-news face?"

"You just do!" he laughed at her discomfort.

"Well, I'm not telling them," Emily decided. "It's not our place, and…what is so break-bad-news-y about my face?"

"Well don't obsess about it," Will rolled his eyes.

"I'm not obsessing," Emily obsessed.

"Clearly obsessing."

"What IS it?" Emily squealed.

"What's so funny?" came Cassandra's inquiry. She approached the two of them walking.

"My…face basically?" Emily tried to catch Will's eye, but he was studiously avoiding Cassandra's.

"No, uh, we were actually…" Will stammered. His discomfort was palpable. "We were just discussing a case, so…"

"Oh, uh," Cassandra stammered in return. "Yeah, sure. Of course. See you guys later." She rushed off.

The misery of both parties was clear to anything with the collective intelligence of a house plant. Emily felt the guilt settle in the pit of her stomach. It was hard to see any human being in that much pain...even if it was Cassandra, and not technically a human being.

"I know I asked you not to date her," Emily said carefully, "and I'm very grateful, but, uh…you don't have to be rude…"

"Seriously?" Will snapped, showing his own pain for the first time. "You asked me to blow her off. Now you want to manage the way I do it?"

"Now I just feel really bad," she frowned. She hoped that he would say his usual inspiring words to make her feel better, but no such words existed.

"Well, you know," he said in explanation, "it's sort of an awkward situation. But if I'm too friendly she's gonna get mixed signals, which I don't want her to get, so… just let me handle it."

Emily nodded. She had known that Cassandra would be upset that Will had stopped his flirting, but she hadn't considered how upset Will would be by it. Her guilt, which had been tolerable, grew.

-No-she told the guilt-I'm doing it was his own good! It's not like the two of them would have a REGULAR relationship, even if it would SEEM normal for awhile. She would have pounced on him, sucked his blood, and left him to die, likes she's done to so many other victims. You're saving him!-

Try as she might, though, the guilt could not be pushed away.

...

"What does that mean?" Joyce asked her son, who had just spewed a great deal of technical jargon.

"'No metastasizing' means that the tumor hasn't grown," Micah said carefully.

"Which is good news," she said, leading.

"Definitely," Micah agreed, putting on the giant smile of denial that she knew so well. "That part is good."

"What part isn't?" she shot at him.

"There's no good or bad, really," he said vaguely. She found his pleasantness unnerving. "We don't like to classify things that way because we're looking at the whole picture."

"Oh," she said suspiciously. "Did the tumor shrink at all?"

"Okay," Micah fought to keep his mask. "It's not just about shrinking. What we need to do right now is we need to find the exact right combination of meds."

Joyce felt her panic rise. What wasn't he telling her? "Because the first ones didn't work?"

Micah chuckled hollowly. "It isn't that…Mom, It's just that we have even more effective ones in our arsenal. So a lot of this is trial and error. The good news is that we have a lot of medications to choose from."

"Wow," said Joyce, putting on a strong face. "That's a lot of good news."

She send a page to Emily.

...

"I got your page," Emily said from the doorway. "Is everything okay?"

Joyce, who was pacing by the window, let out a relieved sigh. "Close the door. Please?"

Worried, Emily complied. "What's going on?"

"I don't know!" Joyce said, frustrated. "No one will tell my anything about my scans today."

"You didn't talk to Micah?" Emily wondered. She doubted Micah would appreciate that she had talked with her mother before he did.

"I did!" Joyce shouted. "He keeps saying things are good, things are good. But I know my son, and the more he says things are good, the more I know things are NOT good."

Emily had been worried about this when he had rushed on her earlier. "Let me go get him, okay?"

"No!" Joyce insisted. "He won't tell me anything. And I called the oncologist, and he's off for the weekend...and I…I need to know what's going on. I need to know…what did the CT scan show?"

Emily saw Joyce's distress, and it killed her to know that she had an answer to her question. Micah would never forgive her if she told anything. That was why he had been so upset. "Um," she tried, "if Micah…"

"You're my doctor too," Joyce demanded. "Don't you have an obligation? This is my life and nobody will tell me what's going on. I…deserve to know what's going on. Please…tell me. Did the tumor shrink?"

Emily didn't know what to do. She was right. If the patient had been anyone else, it was her obligation as a doctor to tell them. She couldn't let her feelings for Micah get in the way of doing her job.

"No," she said in a teary whispers.

Joyce took a few steps, inhaled sharply, and covered mouth with a hand. She nodded: "Thank you."

Holding in her tears, Emily sat down and places a comforting hand on Joyce's shoulder. She needed to talk to Micah right away.

...

"Anticipate," Will said, "as in 'they did not anticipate that Will would play such an awesome word.'"

Emily smiled, trying to focus on her own game. Will had surprised them all with Bananagram supplies, and an impromptu game had commenced on the roof.

"Peel," she played.

"PeelING," Will put down. He was on a roll! He turned to look at Tyra, who was struggling, "What's the matter over there, can't make sense of your letters?"

Tyra snapped, "Will you shut up? I can't think."

"Just ignore him," Emily advised. "That's his signature move: yak, yak, yak."

"What are you guys playing?" Cassandra's voice asked from the stairs.

"Bananagrams, Tyra replied, trying to focus. "Why don't you talk to Will, distract him?"

Emily wanted to shush her friend when she heard this, seeing Will's growing discomfort. He stood.

"You know what," he spoke awkwardly, "actually, why don't you, um, go ahead and take my spot. I should probably…I should probably go back."

"Okay," Cassandra said, taking his seat. When he had gone, she asked the remaining two, "I'm not crazy, you guys saw that, right? He doesn't even want to be near me?"

Emily avoided answering. She looked over to see how Tyra was doing. "There's no 'I' in obfuscate."

"There is too," Tyra said.

"You sure he didn't say anything?" Cassandra continued.

"Sorry," Emily said, pushing down her guilt. "No, you're spelling it wrong…"

"No," Tyra insisted. "I'm winning, so you're trying to distract me."

"It's a 'U'" Cassandra instructed. "Look…I know you have no reason to want to help me…but I am really at a loss. So if there's any way you could find out… anything…" Emily remained impassive. Cassandra had clearly had enough. She scoffed: "You are such a ridiculous person, Pits. Why the hell am I being so nice to you if you can't do me one simple favor?"

And...just like that, Emily's guilt was gone. "Cassandra, how is it that you always know JUST what to say?"

Before her nemesis could reply, Micah burst onto the roof. "I need to speak with Emily," he said angrily. When Tyra and Cassandra didn't move, he added: "Alone, please?"

Emily's heart sunk. She knew that he would be angry that she had talked to his mother without him. "I tried to find you," she told him as the other two left, "but you'd already gone…"

"You are in no way qualified to assess a cancer patient's prognosis!" he yelled.

Emily felt the guilt of this too, more powerfully than she had expected. She knew, technically, that she hadn't done anything wrong, but seeing Micah's hurt was almost more than she could bear.

"She asked that…" Emily tried, frightened, "for her test…"

"You crossed a line!" He shouted, pointing a blaming finger. His pain shown clear in his eyes.

"No one would talk to her," Emily said, trying to return logic to the difficult case, "and if it wasn't your mother-"

"But it IS my mother!" Micah cried desperately. "It's my MOTHER! And you had no right telling her that she might DIE."

"I didn't say that," Emily felt herself on the edge of tears.

"Well, she's gonna think you meant that," Micah yelled, "and she's gonna give up fighting. That happens to patients; I've seen it. They give up fighting. And I'm not ready for her to give up fighting, because it's…it's not her time."

Micah's expression changed. He was not angry at her, he was angry at the world.

"I know I'm a doctor and….I see death all the time…but this is my mom…" he looked back at Emily.

Her chin trembled. She reached out and grabbed his hand. "I know."

Micah holds her gaze for as long as he can, but breaks down. Emily approached his crying form and wrapped her arms around him, her own tears falling. "Please don't tell me it's going to be okay," he sobbed.

"I don't think there should be any more lying, Micah" Emily said softly. "I don't think that helps anyone."

"But...it didn't shrink, Emily..." he cried, pulling away. "I don't know what to tell her."

"You know," Emily said, trying to be strong. "Joyce and I have chitchatted at length, and I can tell you, that she is one tough lady. Tell her the truth, okay? Tell her you need her to fight."

...

"What a douche bag," Will said of Sammy's biological father, who had refused to even be tested as a donor.

"Not everyone's meant to be a parent, I guess," Emily said sadly. What an awful, heart-wrenching day she was having.

"No one is asking him to be!" Will argued. "If you had the chance to save a little boy's life, wouldn't you do it? No questions asked?"

"Well, yes," Emily said. "But I'm a doctor."

Will nodded reluctantly, but couldn't shake his annoyance. It had been building all day. He scanned the room, biting his lip, and then quickly looked back to Emily.

"So, what do you have going on tonight?" he asked suddenly, eager to change the subject.

Emily looked over his shoulder to see Cassandra come into the room. She followed Will's lead. "Oh, nothing much. Wallowing in my own guilt, most likely."

"Yeah," Will said, distractedly. "That should be fun."

...

Cassandra went up to the roof to make a phone call only to find Pits already there.

"What are you doing up here?" she asked, knowing that Pits had been tagged to work alongside Dr. Barnes in the liver transplant.

"I just needed some air before my surgery," Emily said shakily.

Cassandra heard this and considered walking away, but the thought of sending a shakily Emily in to cut open a couple children violated the Hippocratic oath. First, do no harm.

"It seems like something's wrong," she sighed, annoyed with herself. "Is something wrong?"

"Cassasndra, I am not in the mood," Emily said, clearly upset.

"What's wrong?" Cassandra repeated.

"I'm not giving you in-tell on Will," Emily said.

"Yeah, I know, you're lame." Cassandra pushed, "What's going on?"

Emily finally relented. In a rush, she said: "I told my patient something that…not only did it not help, it hurt them, so I feel bad, and…guilty. I'm trying not to feel guilty, so…I feel guilty about feeling guilty. That's what's wrong."

"Okay. First," Cassandra advised. She couldn't believe she was about to say what she thought she was about to say. She said it: "There's nothing wrong with guilt. I mean right now I'd like to walk away and leave you here feeling bad because then maybe you'd mess up in the OR or something. But I'd feel guilty about that, so instead I'm telling you: everyone knows you're a good person. It's incredibly annoying. So clearly, whatever you did, you have good intentions because that's just who you are."

"Wow, Cassandra," Emily said, "I didn't think you-"

"Oh god, Pits," Cassandra snapped, "don't act like I'm endorsing you or something. I know you think I'm sub-human just because my brain works differently than yours, but I would never do anything to harm a child. You're fair game, maybe, but not our patients. I'm not a monster."

"No, I," Emily stammered, "I don't think that you're-"

"Of course you do," Cassandra said shortly. "You do-gooder types always do."

...

Emily and Will scrubbed their hands together, readying themselves for surgery.

"I take it back," Emily said. "That whole anyone-but-Cassandra thing. I take it back."

Will hesitated. Was this a test?

"Why?" he asked.

"Because the guilt it driving me crazy," Emily said.

-Ah yes- Will recalled-Emily and her guilt-

"Then don't feel guilty," he advised her.

"I wish I didn't, but I do," she said. "And usually if something is driving me crazy like this it's because it's just not who I am, so…I take it back. Ask her out."

Will felt something inside his chest come alive, as though a part of him that had been beaten into submission was suddenly allowed to go free. Will knew this was not easy for his friend to do.

"You're sure?" he checked.

Emily nodded, sad but sure.

"Well, I appreciate it, Emily," Will said, knowing this was difficult for her. "What you just did: it's very loquastic."

Emily laughed, though he felt her discomfort. He could tell it hurt that he clearly intended to ask Cassandra out. It was good, though, he thought, that they had both learned the boundaries of their friendship. He had felt all along that no relationship could survive an ultimatum.

"Good luck in there Dr. Owens," he said, entering Bandari's OR.

"You too, Dr. Collins," she answered, walking the other way.

...

Hours later, with a successful surgery and some thinking time behind him, Micah entered his mom's room.

"So…" he admitted, "I've been a lousy doctor and a lousy son."

"It's okay," said Joyce, not denying it.

"No, it's not," he thought of Emily's advice to stop lying. "I didn't want to tell you the news because I was afraid that you would stop fighting."

"I know," Joyce said, always three steps ahead of him. "But I need you to be honest with me. I'm strong, I can handle it."

"That's good…" Micah said, fighting his emotions again, "that YOU can."

He saw realization of his struggle dawn on his mother's face. She cried "Oh!" scooting over in her bed and patting the spot next to her. "Come here."

Micah blinked back his tears in embarrassment. "I'm not getting into bed with you."

"You may be a big shot doctor," Joyce chided him, "but you're sill my Micah Mouse."

"Never say that out loud again," he pleaded.

"Get in the bed," Joyce commanded.

Micah looked around to check that no one was watching. Just like he did as a little boy, he sat beside her and was covered with a blanket. He laid his head on her shoulder and she stroked it protectively.

"And this…" he said, "is just weird."

"Shh!"

"I'm so scared," Micah admitted.

"I know," she said. "Me too."

Micah's shoulders shook in a sob. "I'm sorry," he sniffled, ashamed. "I know I should be strong and all that, but I-"

"No baby," she shushed him. "It's okay that you're crying. It means you love me."

"I love you, mom."

...

"Oh, sorry," Cassandra muttered, motioning for Will to go ahead of her. If he wanted to blow her off, she wasn't about to be the fool that followed after.

"Actually," he met her eyes, looking nervous, "I was hoping you'd...um...that I could talk to you."

"And why would I want to do that?" Cassandra asked, not meanly, just resigned.

"Because you deserve an apology," he said.

Cassandra perked up. "I'm listening."

"Look, I just," Will tried. "There was this thing I was dealing with, and the way I treated you...it had nothing to do with you, and I'm sorry."

"What was the thing?" Cassandra inquired.

"It's...it's nothing," Will avoided. Cassandra's eyes narrowed. "No, no: I'm not blowing you off, okay? It was nothing. Not only was it nothing: it's taken care of."

"That's not really-"

"Please go out with me!" Will interrupted. "I know I've behaved badly, but I promise I'll be good."

Cassandra nodded. This was more like it. No guy rejected HER. She wondered if she should make him squirm.

"I think about you all the time, and I..." Will was saying. Cassandra couldn't help herself, she beamed. "You're smiling, why are you smiling?"

"Because I have a very handsome man in front of me," Cassandra said.

"Will you go to dinner with me?" Will asked directly.

"I thought you'd never ask."

"Is that a yes?" he laughed nervously.

"No," Cassandra replied, "this is a yes: pick me up a 8:00."


	6. Chapter 6

Episode 6

Will spotted Emily and turned to Cassandra. "Alright, it's now or never."

"Never is good," Cassandra attempted to smile. "I like never..."

Will raised an eyebrow.

"Fine," she relented. "Now it is. Ugh, if only you weren't so darn cute."

Will grinned. "I know, right?" He leaned in for a kiss. Noticing that Emily's gaze fell upon them, he motioned for her to come over.

"So," Cassandra said, taking the lead, "I wanted to talk to you."

"Yeah?" Emily asked, clearly doubtful. "What's up?"

"Well he-"

"-Me-" Will took credit.

"-says that I've been a little bit of a bitch to you-"

"-I didn't say 'a little bit'-" Will cut in, trying to show Emily that not only would she not regret "allowing" the two of them to date, but it would also make things easier for her.

"The point is," Cassandra forced herself to say, "you guys are friends, and I like him, a little bit-"

"Not a little bit," Will said to Cassandra.

"-So I want things to be good with us and I really going to make an effort."

"Good," Emily nodded. "Me too."

Will knew his friend well enough to know that she wasn't really buying it. He wasn't so smitten that he couldn't see her displeasure. It didn't matter, though. He would be the glue that bonded these two-he would show Cassandra how amazing Emily was and the rivalry would end. He would create friends where once there were enemies.

He felt on top of the world.

...

Kelly, meanwhile, felt at the bottom. Her co-worker Dr. Putnam was back, as charming and/or slimy (depending on one's knowledge of said co-worker) as always. Her one night stand with him had made working in his proximity awkward enough, though his vacation had at least made things easier for awhile.

"Tell you what," Dr. Putnam said, "that mother is driving me crazy."

"You'll see that sometimes," Kelly offered. "I mean, hormones do all kinds of things..."

"You don't have to tell me," Dr. Putman said with a wink. "So, I see one of two ways this could go: either you pick an intern you want to torture a little bit and have her deal with the mother or I pick an intern I think is cute and I impress her with my vast knowledge while she deals with the mother. Your choice."

Kelly rolled her eyes. How did he manage that-to act as though they had never been together? To talk to her as though she was now his wingman?

An intern she wanted to torture, huh? "Dr. Owens!" she called as the blond who the nurses gossiped about walked past. That Putnam looked pleased was both irritating and gratifying. Maybe they would distract each other.

...

Cassandra sought out Emily some time later. "Peace offering?" she asked.

They rushed to the observation area of the OR, looking in on Will, who was about to make his first cut.

"Thanks for telling me," Emily said, genuinely happy.

"Yeah, well," Cassandra shrugged, "I figured if you were free you might want to watch."

They watched as Will and Micah exchanged words and Will reached out for the scalpel. He let it hover momentarily, but then swiped it down. Cassandra felt herself tingle all over.

"He's just so freaking sexy," she let herself say out loud.

Her mind replayed the nights before - each sweaty and and frantic and passionate. She had wondered if he was too good to be true, but he wasn't. He was just good.

"It's funny," Cassandra mused, "I was actually nervous about sleeping with him the first time. Thought it might be a letdown." She giggled joyfully, "It's not!"

"...cool," came Emily's awkward reply.

Cassandra had forgotten who was beside her. Silly little Pits who hadn't lost her virginity until she was 20. This was the last person who she could have a girl chat with.

"Oh, I know, I know: it's weird that I'm talking to you," Cassandra shook her head. She couldn't just give up, though. It was important to Will. " But, um, well I don't really have any girlfriends here yet and Will wants us to get along, so…"

"Yeah, it's fine," Emily said coldly. "We'll just take it slowly, the whole friendship thing."

"Sounds good," Cassandra nodded. She had to admit, it was kind of fun to see Emily squirm.

Cassandra turned back to Will and in moments she had forgotten Pits entirely. Will moved so confidently. His muscled body arched over his work, his hands flying skillfully. She imagined those hands on her body, his chiseled torso rubbing against her...

Cassandra moaned, "I'm gonna go crazy on him tonight."

...

"You know that nurses are all about gossip," Micah said to Kelly, who was complaining about the return of Dr. Putnam.

"Yes," Kelly said thoughtfully.

"Anyway, it's just in their nature to speculate," Micah said. "I mean, come on, you and Putman work closely together. Knowing his nature, of course they would assume..."

"What if it's not just speculation?" Kelly blurted. "Would that freak you out?"

"I, um..." Micah sat back in his chair.

"Oh my god, it totally freaked you out," Kelly buried her head in her hands. "Look-"

"No, okay, hold on," Micah reached for her hand and held it. "Just because I don't know how to react in the moment doesn't mean I'm freaking out, okay? We all do things-or, people-we aren't proud of..."

"And it was such a mistake!" Kelly cried. "I was drunk..."

"Okay, more details that I needed!" Micah put a hand up to stop her.

"I'm sorry," Kelly said. She forced a smile. "I just don't want you to think less of me. And I didn't want you to hear it from anyone else."

"Well," Micah said. "I appreciate that. And I don't think less of you. I worry that you'll be uncomfortable in your job now, but I don't think less of you."

"It should be okay for now," Kelly sighed. "I put Dr. Owens on the case, and so far he finds her pretty distracting."

"Oh, um...Emily?" Micah asked. "Really? He was flirting with her?"

"Is that a problem?" Kelly inquired.

"No!" he said too quickly. "It's just, you know...I'm her boss. It's my job to look out for her."

Kelly pursed her lips and nodded. So it was okay for her to sleep with Dr. Putnam, but not Emily Owens. Maybe the nurse's gossip wasn't as idle as they hoped.

"Enough work talk!" Micah spat out. "I'm just sick of it. You know what is really pressing? Dinner! We have absolutely no plan. We are plan-less."

...

Cassandra stood finishing her paperwork when Emily and Tyra strode up.

"I'm sorry," Emily told her. "You're not even going to talk to me?"

Emily apologizing? Cassandra tried to push down the scheming part of her, but lack of use had made it stronger.

"Can you run these labs down to Dr. Collins?" Nurse Sunny asked Pits. "I just got a page."

Cassandra was tempted to offer, always eager for an excuse to see Will, but something about Emily's apology was too tempting to leave be. Cassandra knew that Emily was as big a schemer as she, despite everyone's insistence to the contrary. Was this a chance to uncover the truth?

"Yeah, sure," said Emily, taking the folder and leaving.

"What's going on with you and Pits?" Cassandra asked when Emily had left.

"Nothing," Tyra replied.

"Come on, what did she do?" Cassandra pleaded as they walked down the hall together. Then she remembered her promise to Will. "Actually, never mind, I keep forgetting."

"What?" Tyra bit.

"Emily and I are trying out the whole friendship thing," Cassandra did nothing to mask her disgust. "It's important to Will, and she actually helped me out with him, so…" Out of the corner of her eye, Cassandra witnessed her companion's smirk, "What?"

"Nothing," Tyra repeated.

"No," Cassandra demanded. She knew what she had seen. "What's going on? What do you know?"

Tyra looked over at her with a conspiratorial glance, "Like Emily would ever help you with Will, she wants you far away from him."

"Well I know she was...weird about it," Cassandra frowned. "But..."

"Please," Tyra smirked, "she ASKED him to stay away from you."

"What?!" Cassandra yelped. She hushed to a whisper, "and what did he say?"

"He decided to blow you off," Tyra shrugged.

Cassandra's head spun. Her blood boiled. Emily tried to sabotage her relationship? That little bottom feeder! That jealous, innocent-acting snake! The nerve she had to demand-

"But then he asked," Cassandra said, "so Will came to his senses..."

"Uh-uh," Tyra shook her head. "Emily took it back. She felt guilty."

"What?!" Cassandra snapped. A nurse walking nearby cringed. She expected deception from Emily, but that Will had listened was too much. Was he really so neatly wrapped around her finger? She had found his flaw, and she didn't like it.

...

Micah supervised Will as he followed up with his patient.

"Will," Dolores said seductively. "I like that name. Was I really your first, Will?"

"You really were," he said, smiling.

"Good, you never forget your first," she said. She looked over to the door, "Don't just stand there, join the party, sweetheart."

Micah felt his heart speed up as Emily entered.

She gave Micah a cursory nod, then turned to Will, beaming. "These are for you," she said.

"Thank you," he returned her smile."

"Good job in the OR," Emily added with an idolizing look on her face.

Micah's heart slowed again-instead he felt slightly nauseated.

"Thank you."

Micah had pulled strings to make Emily the first intern to make a cut. He had talked her down from a ledge-was always there for her...and yet, she had never looked at him with anything approaching the reverence she showed to Dr. Collins.

"Looks like I've got some competition, huh?" Dolores asked Will.

"What's that? Emily?" Will said, infuriatingly cool. "Oh, no, we're just…um, we're just friends."

Micah staring at him in disgust. How could he just dismiss her like that?

"She know it?" Dolores asked. Micah echoed the sentiment. If Will was never going to be interested, shouldn't he cut her free? He felt very annoyed.

...

Micah entered the break room reading file, completely unaware of Kelly's presence.

He did, however, see Emily Owens, who asked him, "Page-turner?"

"Oh, yeah," he said. "I'm guessing it's going to end with my patient going home…or she'll just turn into a vampire."

"For the record," Emily offered, "I loved vampires before everyone else caught on."

"Is this a point of pride?" Micah asked. Kelly felt a strange twang of jealousy. She didn't know if it was residual awkwardness from being around Dr. Putnam or if there was more to this seemingly innocent conversation between colleagues.

"Mmm, just a fact I am proud of because it happens to be true," Emily was saying.

"So…you and Bram Stoker, huh?" Micah continued. "Pioneers of the genre?"

Kelly remembered Micah's assessment earlier that it was assumed that if people worked closely together there must be something between them. Was she making that assumption? Was that his way of saying that she shouldn't worry?

-But we've never actually had the talk-Kelly admitted-most people assume monogamy, and everything, but some don't. Maybe he hasn't decided yet if he wants to be with me. Maybe he feels open to flirting because he feels...open-

"See, that line really would have worked if you said Polidori," Emily said, getting up to leave. "Look it up."

"Wha…" Micah laughed as he watched her leave.

To Kelly, that was definitely a lingering look. She felt her insides twist. This had to be dealt with now. She jumped forward, "So!"

"Oh, I didn't see you there," he said. She tried to see if he had to rearrange his face, but he seemed unaffected.

This was good. He didn't feel guilty. Or, on the other hand, perhaps he didn't feel connected to her enough to need to feel guilty. "I was thinking-"

"-About that barbecue place?" he teased, "cause I have never seen anyone inhale ribs like that."

"Okay, okay," Kelly said, thrown off the offensive. "I told you I lost control for a minute."

"You licked the plate!" Micah called.

"I didn't lick the plate," Kelly replied, "I swiped it with my finger-"

"Which you then licked!" Micah laughed. He calmed himself to ask, "What's up?"

"I thought maybe," Kelly said, trying to forget the way he had looked at Dr. Owens, "it was time to talk out things non-barbecue-related."

"What…kind of things?" Micah asked uncomfortably.

"Eight-to-ten-week things," she said, "depending on when you start counting."

"Oh," Micah nodded. "When do YOU start counting?"

"Ten weeks ago," Kelly said.

"Got it," Micah smiled. "Okay, sure, let's talk about ten-week things."

Kelly's beeper went off, but things were going in the right direction. The knot in her stomach had loosened. "To be continued!"

...

Cassandra couldn't help but smile broadly when Dr. Bandari chewed out Emily for coming late to the start of rounds. Of course, that she had told Emily that they were pushed back twenty minutes certainly helped.

"I thought you said the meeting had been pushed?" Emily pleaded with Cassandra when their mentor had moved on.

"And I thought you helped me and Will get together," Cassandra snarled, "when in fact you told him not to date me. Tyra told me."

Cassandra was angry to see Emily's reaction. Emily's face could be read like a book-like a boring, lying book. Pits knew she had been caught in a lie, but was already spinning it in her head to make herself seem the victim.

"So, why'd you do it?" Cassandra demanded. "Were you trying screw with me so I'd be off my game and you could one-up me in front of Bandari?"

"No, no of course not. That's…" Emily stumbled, "I'm sorry."

-Sorry to be caught!-Cassandra thought

"No you're not," she told Pits, "but you will be. Here's what you missed: I'm assisting and you're babysitting."

Cassandra walked off in a huff. She felt a touch on her arm, turned to see Will, and then continued to rush past.

"Whoa," Will said, "What's up?

Cassandra didn't answer.

"Worried about your surgery?" Will asked. "I would be. I can't imagine performing open-heart surgery while the patient is awake! That's nuts."

Cassandra remained silent.

"Hey," Will stepped in front of her, forcing her to stop. "What's going on?

-Oh, I don't know-Cassandra shot the thoughts to him through her eyes-you let your friend's ambition stop you from dating me? What kind of pathetic creep are you?-

"Are you..." Will said, somewhat scared, "Are you...okay?"

Cassandra brushed past him without a word.

"Are you not going to tell me?" He asked, following in her wake.

"Maybe you should ask your precious friend Emily," Cassandra spat. "I have nothing to say to you."

She heard Will fall back.

...

Micah picked up Dr. Collin's test results only to see that he had already prescribed medication. Micah felt something inside him snap-that his dislike of Dr. Collins was finally justified.

Will's confidence was absurd, but Micah supposed it would be, what with girls fawning over him. Dr. Collins had expressed a complete lack of nerves when making his first cut, had prescribed medication before getting back test results...had dismissed Emily's-

-Stop!-Micah told himself-it is weird to be more jealous of Emily's crush than Kelly's affair. It's really weird-

Storming through the hospital, he came upon Emily and Will laughing together and felt himself lose it. "You ordered medication for Dolores before her labs came back?"

"It wasn't c-diff?" Will asked.

"It was," Micah said. "That's not the point."

"She was in a lot of pain and I figured-"

"Procedures are there for a reason," Micah shouted, wishing he could calm down. "You wait for results. Period."

"I knew what it was," Will smiled brashly.

"You didn't know," Micah yelled. Who did this guy think he was? "You guessed. Which is how mistakes are made."

"I was right."

"Mistakes are the reason people die."

"I didn't make a mistake," Will continued to sass.

"Because you were lucky," Micah argued.

"No, the patient was lucky," Will dropped the bomb, "because she was in pain and now she's not!"

Micah reeled at this. What kind of narcissistic douche bag would say something like that? What the hell did Emily see in this over-confident meat-head?

"You're off the case," Micah shook his head, rushing past the two.

...

"Stop judging me," Will said to Emily as Micah stormed away.

"I'm not judging you," Emily said carefully. "If I was I'd be thinking that you should have waited for the results."

"But you're not," Will reminded.

"Judging?" Emily asked. "No."

Will smiled, "Alright! I was wrong! I was stupid and wrong. Are you happy now?"

Emily nodded, "Yeah, a little bit."

"Dr. Barnes is never going to let me assist again, is he?" Will sighed.

"Look," Emily said, "I know you're sorry. Let me talk to him."

"You'd do that?" Will asked.

"Of course!" Emily smiled. "Besides, I owe you."

"Yeah you do!"

...

"So," Micah asked Emily as she joined him up on the roof, "how's it going with Peter post AWAKE open heart surgery?"

"Dr. Bandari's angry with me," Emily answered.

"Again?" Micah laughed. Seeing her hurt face, he added, "Not 'again' like-"

"No, that's fair," Emily said. "Again. As in, I am a terrible intern."

"You are not a terrible intern," Micah insisted. "So what'd you do?"

Emily shot him a look and he smiled. "Ugh! Okay...I told him that his heart stopped and now he's doubting his faith and his girlfriend is leaving him..."

"No offense to the magnitude of any of those problems," Micah said, "but what does that have to do with you?"

"I told him his heart stopped..." Emily held out her hands. "I basically told him that he had just died..."

"Look," Micah said, "you were right to tell my mom the truth and you were right to tell him-"

"No, I should have known that Peter would react like that-"

"Off the record?" Micah finally asked.

"Always," Emily replied. Micah fought a smile.

"Dr. Bandari should've prepped you," he admitted. "She's not always the best teacher."

"Exactly!" Emily said triumphantly. "That's what I wrote in my evaluation! I said that she has a lot ot offer, but it's always delivered with so much negativity that it's hard to process."

Micah had forgotten the intern evaluations were happening. Emily would be the person earnest enough to give an honest assessment. He laughed, "Please tell me you didn't really write that, did you?"

"Not really…yeah..."

Micah felt embarrassed for her. She had to be the sweetest, most misguided person he'd ever met.

"I planned on being a together person past all the crap," Emily was saying, "but I'm not past it. I keep finding myself in the exact same situations and I don't know how to stop it from happening."

-Like being in love with an idiot?-Micah wondered.

"I gave up the illusion of control, when was it?" Micah said out loud. "Oh, yeah, about halfway through my first year as an intern. Doctors can't plan, can we? We just react."

Micah thought about his reaction to Will. It wasn't right, taking things out on him just because of the way he treated Emily. It was unprofessional to be seen yelling and screaming at one's employees.

"The one thing you can control," Micah told them both, "is how to react better. So we learn from experience, right? Next time, just do things differently."

"Can I just say," Emily smiled adoringly, "you are a much better teacher than Dr. Bandari?"

Micah had longed for her to look at him that way, but now that she did, he couldn't control his blushing. "Hope you didn't put that in your evaluation."

Micah finished his coffee and got up to go.

"Uh..." Emily called him back.

"What?" he asked. Was it his own fading blush, or did Emily seem a little embarrassed to speak also?

"This might be a little inappropriate..." she started.

Micah couldn't control the huge smile that covered his face. "Inappropriate" could only mean so many things, most of them having to do with her finding him attractive, perhaps.

"That's okay," he encouraged. His mind flew far ahead of him. Would he ask her out? What restaurant would they go to? Would she want to move in?

"...Will knows that he screwed up," Emily said instead. Micah felt his face fall. "He gets all defensive in the moment, but then, right after, he knows that he screwed up."

Micah wanted to shout. Or hit something. Or maybe cry. What the hell did take? But instead he took his own advice and reacted differently.

"Good to know," he nodded.

Later, he approached Kelly.

"So we're clear," he said, "you're counting from dinner at Arcadia?"

"Yes, I am counting from dinner at Arcadia." She nodded.

He held his arms wide, "Could've gone nowhere."

"Okay, look," she turned to him with her cute smile, "I didn't want to have to get all technical on your ass, but here's the deal: you go on a date, and if it turns into a relationship, you retroactively count from the first time you kissed, regardless of what you dating status was at the time. So we're clear."

Micah nodded in understanding, "Which means that the eight- or ten-week question is actually predicated on our relationship talk, which is still pending."

"You make a good point," Kelly lead.

"So, can we just agree to skip the talk and count retroactively?" Micah asked.

"We can do that, yes."

"Yeah?" Micah smiled. Kelly was cute, she was funny-maybe she was a little aggressive, but she liked him. There was no jealousy or competition. "If we weren't in a hospital right now, I'd be kissing you," Micah said honestly. "Just so we're clear."

...

"I am so sick of it," Emily told Cassandra. "This whole dynamic."

Cassandra found this funny. "You know what I'm sick of? Your whole innocent act. You're the one who's perpetuating this dynamic. You hate me so much you asked Will not to date me."

"No, that's not because I…" Emily attempted. Cassandra was mollified to see sweet innocent Emily run out of excuses. Her expression changed.

"What," Cassandra prodded, "it's not because of what?"

"It wasn't because Will is my friend," Emily said slowly. "It's because I was…or maybe I still am…in love with Will."

Cassandra saw Emily's tears. In a moment, she knew her suspicions had been wrong. Emily was not a schemer-she was exactly what she seemed to be: a fool to her emotions.

"I told him that and he rejected me," Emily continued. "And when he chose you it was incredibly painful…trying to get over him and seeing the two of you together. I didn't think that I could handle it, so…I asked him not to see you."

Cassandra was angry to find herself feeling...sorry. She felt sorry for Emily. Of course Will would turn her down-Will deserved to be with someone hot-and it was silly of Emily to think she had stood a chance, but still, not even her worst enemy deserved to go through that...

"And I realized it was wrong and I took it back, but…" Emily stammered, "I'm trying not to apologize for things that I'm not sorry for, but…I am really sorry about that."

Cassandra felt compelled to accept her apology-possibly even give her a hug... No, nope! Definitely not that.

"Well," she finally decided to say, "at least you were finally honest."

"No apparent bleeding," Will kidded. "I saw Emily go in and you came out."

"She told me," Cassandra said." That she was in love with you and you rejected her."

"Look, I didn't know you that long…" Will tried to explain, "and Emily and I had been friends for…"

"No. I get it," Cassandra said. Now that the moment was here, she found she didn't need an apology. "You can make it up to me," she smiled.

Will drew in for a kiss, but Cassandra gently pushed him off. She nodded to Emily, who had just come out of the locker room.

"But, uh, let's keep it professional at work," Cassandra said. She supposed it was the least she could do.


	7. Chapter 7

I can't tell you all how much I appreciate the comments. It's such a huge motivator to keep going. Thank you!

Episode 7

"Happy birthday, Dr. Kopelson," Will smiled as Cassandra walked towards the nurse's station. She stopped in her tracks and smiled back.

"Was I that obvious?" she asked.

"You may have let it slip a few...dozen...times," Will replied.

"Oh my gosh!" exclaimed Nurse Sunny. "It's your birthday!"

"Who?" asked Nancy.

"Dr. Kopelson!"

Will could tell that Cassandra was practically glowing as the entire nursing staff (or so it seemed) had gathered to wish her a happy day.

Nancy dug out a name tag with a birthday cake and Sunny found a headband that read, "Happy Birthday!"

"There you go," Will said as he placed it carefully on her head, "a whole outfit."

"Lets see it!" Sunny said. Cassandra turned to model her new attire.

"Happy birthday, Cassandra," said Emily, who had approached warily.

"Uh, you too," Cassandra said quickly.

Will looked up. There are some things you can't unhear.

"She's kidding, right?" Will asked, shocked. "You guys don't really share a birthday."

"You didn't know it was her birthday?" Cassandra sounded shocked.

"No," Emily said ruefully. "He didn't."

"She refused to tell anyone," he explained, mind still reeling.

"I'm not really a birthday person," Emily said.

"Understood," Cassandra said, "Say no more."

"Well, now that I know," Will said, "Emily, happy birthday."

"Do me a favor," she said uncomfortably, "don't tell anyone."

There was no way, in Will's mind, that he could do that. Not when she was so clearly embarrassed at the attention.

"Absolutely," Cassandra said. "We'll respect your wishes."

"But you are coming out for drinks tonight?" Will pushed.

"I'm really tired," Emily invented.

"Come on!" Will cried, as unsure of her refusal to come out as her refusal to share the date to begin with. "Really, what' the big deal?"

"It's like I said, I'm just not a birthday person," she said, walking off.

Will shook his head. There was no way he was going to let her get away with those excuses anymore.

...

"Joyce!" Emily called.

"Oh!" Joyce turned in surprise. "Hello, sweetheart."

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Oh, I'm okay," Joyce fibbed. "Not too bad."

Emily sighed. Joyce's pain could be read on her face like a book.

"How's the nausea?" she asked.

"Hard," Joyce admitted. "That part's really hard. I can't keep anything down. Well that's what I was…I was coming up here to see…" Joyce looked around to make sure no one was watching, "My friend Miranda said her oncologist gave her something, you know, to eat. That you usually… smoke?"

"Oh," Emily laughed, "medical marijuana."

"Miranda says it helps," Joyce repeated.

"Yeah," Emily said thoughtfully. "It's a very effective tool to combat nausea and it helps the appetite. I think it's a great idea."

Joyce still looked nervous. "Could you talk to Micah about this?" she asked. "I spent so many years as a mom telling him that drugs are going to ruin his life…"

"Yeah no problem!" Emily grinned. "You can consider me your hook-up."

"Stop it you!" Joyce laughed.

...

Will and Emily shared a look after leaving their newest patient - a criminal with an armed guard outside his door.

"What do you think he did wrong?" Will asked.

"Forgot to put a collar on his dog?" Emily offered. He had seemed far too nice to be a criminal...

"Seriously!" Will agreed.

"I don't know," Emily said. "I'm trying not to think about it. Taking Dr. Bandari's advice."

"Hey," came Cassandra's despondent voice. Emily recognized her nemesis's patented birthday blues immediately.

"Hey," Will said, unaware. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Cassandra sighed.

"Are you sure?" Will asked. "You seem a little upset."

-Careful, Will-Emily thought-you're walking into a trap-

"Fine," Cassandra revealed. "I might be a little."

-Ooh, stepped right into it!- Emily cringed.

"I just thought," Cassandra pouted, "since it's my birthday, you could've gotten me a little something." She rolled her eyes, "Even a card."

"I'm sorry," Will said. "I feel terrible."

"Another delivery, Dr. Cassandra," said Manuel the flower deliverer, who held a large vase of roses.

"Thank you Manuel!" Cassandra turned on a smile. "Mmm, I guess some of my friends remembered…" She gave Will a smug look and opened the envelope, only to call out in excitement. "I hate you!"

-Oh-Emily realized-of course Will hadn't forgotten. When did Will ever forget anyone's birthday? That was one of the reasons she had not told him-

"No, you don't," he said charmingly.

"No, I don't," Cassandra agreed. "Exception to the no-kissing-at-work thing?"

He nodded and they kissed. One of those lingering ones that Emily had always fantasizes about.

-Do not look away!-she told herself-It's like a disease, you have to expose yourself to acquire immunity-

...

"Got anything fun going on today?" Micah asked Kelly when they met in the locker room.

"Same old, same old," Kelly shrugged. "Got a delivery pretty soon. How about you?"

"Um, not same old, if you'll believe it," Micah answered. "There's a criminal-like serious criminal: armed guards and everything...and...oh, the flower guy collapsed."

"Not Manuel?" Kelly cried, "I love him!"

"'Love,' wow," Micah smiled. "You move fast. Kidding!" he added when Kelly shot him a look. "No worries about Manuel, me and Dr. Owens are on the case."

"Oh," Kelly's words trailed off. She supposed those two did work together fairly often. Micah's phone went off.

"Ah, speaking of which," Micah said, "it is Emily's birthday, apparently. Party after shift. You in?"

"Wow, okay," Kelly shook her head, "another girl's party isn't really what I had in mind."

"Well, me either," Micah shrugged, "but it's not 'another girl,' it's just Emily."

"Birthday, presents, cake," Kelly listed, pulling her coat on and closing her locker. "It's a bit much."

...

"Why did I just receive an invite to Emily's birthday party?" Cassandra asked, eyebrow arched.

"Oh, I um," Will grinned guiltily, "I changed our plans, is that alright?"

"You changed-" Cassandra started. "I'm sorry, it kind of sounds like you are throwing a birthday party for another girl. On MY birthday."

"It's not 'another girl,' it's Emily," Will shrugged. "Oh come on, it'll be fun!"

"It will NOT be fun," Cassandra insisted.

"Look, I got carried away. I'm sorry," he said soothingly. "It's just, I've known this girl for four years, right? She won't tell me her birthday? I find it out, I want to make her squirm, you know?"

Cassandra frowned. She felt like she was being obvious in her disapproval, yet Will's attentions to Emily kept escalating. Worse still, Cassandra knew it was all her fault for her ill-placed "you too." How could she have known...

"She makes up this crazy story about a cable company," Will was blabbing on and on. "She doesn't even own a TV! It's crazy!"

"I'm glad you find it funny," Cassandra said, having greater difficulty hiding her displeasure. "You invited like, a million people."

"Yeah," Will said proudly. "This way she can't get out of it! You know, the whole thing snow-balls!" He saw her frown and changed tactics, "Uh, like I said, I got carried away…"

"Yeah," Cassandra said with a mighty eye-roll.

...

Will was still thinking of ways to torture Emily when they walked after their patient and his armed guard. He wondered what kind of gift he should get. Something not TOO thoughtful, obviously, since he didn't want to give her the wrong idea, but also something that demonstrated his appreciation. Maybe the party was enough.

The prisoner Blake called back to them for reassurance as he preceded them into the scanning room. Will and Emily shared a look.

"Come on," Will asked. "You're not a little bit curious?"

"Of course I am," Emily admitted, "but…"

"Come on," Will addressed the guard. "What did he do?"

"Will!" Emily squealed.

"You can just go inside if you don't want to know," Will challenged.

Emily walked past him with her nose in the air, then slowed and turned around. They both looked intently at the guard.

"He raped four women," said the man. "Choked the last one with a plastic bag and left her for dead."

Will felt his insides seize up. His alpha-male nature made him hyper-aware of Emily as they entered after Blake. He read the charts with a manic intensity, trying to push away the mental image of Emily being attacked. Then he realized that she was already in the room, alone.

Will rushed in and grabbed the ultrasound from her, pushing her back. She moved timidly behind him, clearly upset.

"Oh," said the prisoner. "You heard."

...

Micah pushed the elevator button and stood back to wait. Kelly approached. "Hey you."

"How was the delivery?" he asked.

"Very cute baby," she replied. "Objectively cute."

Micah shook his head, "Cute's not objective."

"Aw, trust me I've seen hundreds," Kelly said. She hesitated, wanting to talk about something more important... "So I uh heard your mom was admitted."

"Yeah, don't worry," Micah said dismissively. "She's okay, but nauseous. She wants to try medical marijuana."

Kelly smiled. That wasn't really the point... "Should I," she struggled, "I don't know, say hi?"

"Uh, no," Micah said. Kelly's disappointment was palpable. "Maybe not this time. You know, just because she's not feeling so good."

-She has cancer, Micah-Kelly thought-when is she ever going to feel good?-

"Yeah, no," she said instead. "Got it…it's no problem."

The elevator arrived and Micah got in.

"Oh, by the way," he called, "you look cute today. Objectively."

...

Will was waved down by the prisoner's armed guard as he walked through the hall. He gestured to the room where Emily and Blake were now alone.

"Happy birthday Emily," Will heard him say. "I wish that I could give you a present. Trust me, Emily, you'd really like it." Will saw his rapist hand reach up to grab her.

"What are you doing in here alone?" He scolded, shoving her out of the way.

"Um…I..." she stammered.

"Get out of here!"

"He needs an EKG..." Emily said, voice shaking.

"I got it," Will said.

Blake turned his head after her, biting his lip thoughtfully. "Now that one is something special, don't you think?"

"Don't look at her that way, you sick-"

"What," Blake sneered, "you worried she might like it?"

Will checked that the guard was not watching and leaned in closer to whisper: "You listen to me, psychotic piece of trash, if you so much as look at her the wrong way, I will kill you. Do you hear me? I'm your surgeon...I will be standing over you with a knife when you are sleeping. Understand?"

"Whoa, Heathcliff," Blake exhaled, coming back to himself. "I was just joking, man. Take it easy."

"The tests are fine," Will said, checking the EKG perfunctorily. "Don't let me hear you complaining again."

Without waiting for a response, Will strode after Emily. A nurse pointed him to the ladies room. He pounded on the door, "That's your warning, I'm coming in."

He found Emily rinsing her face, clearly just finished crying. "What were you thinking going in there alone?" He yelled.

"I'm fine," she argued.

"Emily!" Will grabbed at her. "Hey!"

She avoided his eyes, "I have to go get Manuel's surgery approved."

With that, she stormed out. Will gazed after her.

-I would do it, too-he thought-I would kill the man who threatened Emily-

He stood catching his breath.

...

"Look!" Joyce screeched in laughter. "I'm dancing!" She pointed to the cavorting stick figure on her iPad on which her face had been pasted.

"I know mom, I thought it was funny too," Micah nodded. "When it came out. Five years ago."

Joyce reached for the marijuana brownie and took another bite.

"All right, take it easy, Cheech," he said moving it away. He decided she needed a different distracting. "Listen, I need to get a birthday present. Do you have any suggestions?"

"Wine," she said simply.

Micah thought about it. "Not personal enough."

"Mmm…" Joyce said suggestively, "you want something personal. Is this birthday person perhaps the mysterious woman you've been seeing?"

"No," Micah said honestly, "she's not."

"Why won't you introduce me?" Joyce whined.

"Because," Micah invented, "I don't need you high telling her how badly you need grandchildren."

"I do need them!"

"Mom!"

"All my friends have them," Joyce whined all the more.

"Right, okay," Micah admitted defeat. "Show me the dancing thing."

Joyce erupted in laughter once more and this time Emily's giggle joined in. "I am happy to see you're enjoying your medication."

"You have no idea," Micah said, exasperated.

"Emily," Joyce butted in, "you have to see this!"

Emily took a peak at the dancing Joyce-head and chuckled diligently.

"So, help Micah with his birthday present dilemma," Joyce blurted out.

Micah felt a moment of panic. He should have known his mother would give too much away! Would she suspect anything?

"I don't want a birthday present," Emily insisted.

"It wasn't…" Micah tried to explain it away.

"It's your birthday?" Joyce asked.

"Yeah…" Emily affirmed reluctantly.

"Okay," Joyce whispered conspiratorially, "just tell me already."

"What?" Micah asked, glad to change the subject.

"That you two are dating!" Joyce exclaimed. "Enough with the secrets. I just want to celebrate!"

Micah felt more embarrassment in that moment than in the entirety of his childhood. Would Emily think he had been talking about her? Would she think that he had been thinking-?

"Mom, um," he said quickly, "so the woman I'm dating is named Kelly and this is exactly why I didn't bring her here: because I knew you'd be out of your mind."

Joyce's happy face fell into a frown. She watched them seriously.

Micah's nervousness had taken over. He heard himself over-talking, but he couldn't help it. His mind was flooded with terrifying thoughts. Did she think of him that way? What was she thinking? What about Kelly?

"Thank god its just Emily," he was babbling. "She didn't traumatize you, did she?"

"Momentarily," Emily kidded. Or was it kidding? "I've recovered." She turned to Joyce, "I'll see you soon. Enjoy."

Micah bit back his continued rambling, literally swallowing his words. He stared after her. Why would he ask if she had been traumatized? Why had his heart hung in his throat hoping she would say no? Was it only as a joke that she said yes?

"It just doesn't seem right," Joyce pouted. "She's such a nice girl. And you are clearly crazy about her-"

"I am not...crazy-" Micah turned back to his mother. "Look, there are any number of reasons that Emily and I are not together, the first being that she doesn't feel that way about me and the most important being that I am seeing someone else."

"But how serious can it be if you won't even let me meet her?" Joyce cried, upset.

"Maybe it's all the more serious," Micah tried, "because I don't want you to meet her for the first time while you're high as a kite."

"Oh humph," Joyce pouted.

"Okay, fine," Micah relented. "I'll introduce you. Soon. You'll love her."

"It just doesn't seem right," Joyce said again.

...

"So, I pissed Dr. Bandari off pretty royally today," Will said as he and Emily walked through the lobby towards their cars.

"Her bark's worse than her bite," Emily shrugged.

Will was astounded by his friend's change in perspective. "Look at you! All upbeat," he cheered. "You seem like a girl that's ready to party. After the cable guy comes, of course."

"Okay, there is no cable guy!" Emily said. "But you have to cancel that party."

-Cancel?-Will scoffed-when I'm already having so much fun?-

"I can't," he said simply.

"Yes, you can," she insisted. "Tweet it, twitter it, or move it to a bar."

"Can't," he repeated. "It's, like, in half an hour. People are probably already on their way."

"To my apartment!" Emily said in a panicked whisper.

"Yeah," Will said cooly.

"Everything's out!"

"What's out?" he teased. "Your meth lab?"

"No!" she pushed past him and ran out the door.

Will looked after her, smiling wickedly. Some people were just too easy.

...

Kelly and Micah talked in the parking lot somewhere between her car and his.

"I, uh," Kelly struggled, "I saw you with your mom today."

Micah felt slight panic, "Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah," she said, "you two were laughing. With Dr. Owens."

"Oh, right," Micah nodded. "Yeah, I put her on my mom's case awhile back. They kinda bonded, so she dropped in to say hi."

Kelly nodded.

"So, party, right?" asked Micah, eager to get going.

"No, you know," Kelly shuffled uneasily. "I'm tired. I might just head home, actually."

"I know you're tired," Micah said. "Who cares? We're always tired. It'll be fun."

"I guess I…want to talk to you," Kelly murmured, "but I hate how it makes me feel."

Micah looked at her, oblivious. "How does it make you feel?"

"Jealous," she admitted. "Irrational. I feel jealous and I hope it's irrational...and at the risk of seeming desperate and clingy (both of which I, as a feminist, despise)...I need to ask if you have a thing for Emily Owens."

Micah laughed uncomfortably. "Have a-"

"-thing," Kelly repeated. "Yeah, I said…thing."

Micah laughed again, terrified. "I…"

"I mean, no," Kelly interrupted, "don't..don't answer right now. You're just going to say no, because that's what we do in these situations, we say no and I … really need you to think about it."

Micah's heart was beating out of his chest. He had thought his mother's insinuations were frightening, but somehow this was much worse.

"Because I don't want to be a fool," Kelly finished.

He laughed nervously again, but she walked away.

It all became very real in that moment-the moment when all of the thoughts that had been floating serenely through his mind were caught, trapped, and defined. He didn't feel ready.

He thought as he drove to Emily's apartment. His relationship with Kelly was easy-somewhat competitive and nerve-wracking, but easy. He hadn't realized until she confronted him, however, that he viewed it as something temporary-a placeholder. She was right...he couldn't really be serious about Kelly if he was hung up on someone else.

Did he have a "thing" for Emily Owens? Micah arrived at her door and let herself in. Despite the large crowd, he immediately locked eyes with her from across the crowded room. His breath caught in his throat.

-Yes-he thought to himself definitively-yes, I most certainly do-

He saw a small pile of gifts and moved to drop his off. When he looked up, however, Emily had disappeared.

...

Emily kicked the kissing couple out of her bedroom and then decided the bedroom was the place to be. Quiet. No parting. All good things.

"Whatcha doing?" came Will's voice.

"Oh," she said, "just having a good time."

"You know," Will sighed, closing the door behind him, "I'm starting to think you were serious about this whole hating your birthday thing."

"Yeah," she said, "you think?"

"What's the deal, anyway?" he asked. "And don't just say its cause you're not a birthday person, cause quite frankly, I don't really know what that means."

"It means," Emily attempted, "I don't like being the center of attention."

"That's not true," Will disagreed. "You were plenty happy being the center of attention after Manuel's lung decompression. You lapped that up like a puppy."

"I didn't lap it up…" Emily started, unconvincingly. "That's different. That's medical, that's a skill. There's no skill in birthdays."

"Since when are birthdays about celebrating skills?" Will shouted, "It's about celebrating you!"

Emily nearly melted under Will's gaze. "Yeah…sorry, just…I'm not comfortable with that."

Will went to stand and kick something under her bed. Emily's panic returned-she had thought that to be a safe hiding place.

"What's...?"

"Nothing!" she sighed, but he had already pulled leaned down to investigate.

"Oh, you play the, uh…"

"Cello, yeah," she finished.

"This is great," he exclaimed, "you any good?"

"I don't want to boast," Emily boasted, "but when I was in ninth grade my teacher asked me to audition for first chair."

"No kidding," Will looked impressed, "you get it?"

"I didn't," Emily recalled. Feeling her old regret come back. "Audition. I didn't audition." Will's questioning face caused her to elaborate: "You had to do a solon front of everybody judging you…I know it's totally lame and I really regret it!"

Will came back to sit beside her. Try as she might, she felt tingly to have his so near...on her bed.

"Owens, I'm going to say something here," he began, "and I want you to take this with a grain of alcohol, cause I am a little drunk."

-Drunk and on my bed-Emily couldn't help but think-no, focus!-

"No one's judging your flaws except you," he said. "You are so critical of yourself, Emily, all the time. You know, sometimes I wish you could just see yourself… the way I see you."

Emily remembered Will's phone message that she had listened to so many times. This felt like that-like he was admitting that somewhere, deep down, he thought of her differently. He wouldn't have been so protective with the prisoner, after all, if she wasn't, secretly, his...

Emily struggled to keep her voice steady, "How do you see me?"

Will seemed slightly uncomfortable with this question, like he'd given too much away. "I see, um…" he thought, "a girl that would kick ass in a cello recital."

Emily smiled, somewhat disappointed. Will leaned over and bumped her shoulder with his. She grinned, more embarrassed yet.

"So, what do you say?" he asked.

"To what?" she whispered, thinking about nice it would feel to kiss him.

"To a cello recital?" he asked.

Emily came awake from her reverie. "What?"

"Oh, come on," Will said, "you need to do this. The regret is eating away at you."

"No eating," Emily disputed. "Nothing is eating anything."

"That's not true," Will explained. "The way to stop yourself from the constant self-criticism is to put yourself out there. This cello is kept in a case under you bed, Emily, it needs to be set free."

"No," Emily blushed. "No! It's fine where it is, it-"

"Come on," Will begged. "Please, pretty please? For me?"

...

Micah heard Dr. Collins whistle. He flashed the lights on and off.

"Hey there," he addressed the crowd, "sorry to interrupt. We are actually going to have a musical interlude this evening."

Micah watched as a chair was brought over.

"Okay, ladies and gentlemen," Will announced, "that sounded a little formal, but anyway: Emily Owens."

Micah's heart sped up when Emily emerged with a cello. She sat down, laughed nervously, and smiled at him.

"So, this is Cello Suite No.1 in G Major…" she explained. "It's a piece I was suppose to play a long time ago, so there might be a few bobbles."

She played a couple failed notes and stopped, then began again. Micah sat, transfixed. She played beautifully. Of course Emily Owens would be a skilled musician. Music would be the perfect blend of skills for her wonderful hands and her beautiful empathy. As her song grew in intensity, Micah felt his heart swell. He was fooling himself- this constant insistence that he wasn't in love with her.

-That's what it is-Micah realized-I'm in love with her-

By the time Emily played her final notes, Micah was on the edge of his seat. His realization reverberated through his being like the sound through her cello. He stood, clapping wildly as she smiled back at him.

Except...she wasn't smiling at him...she was smiling past him. Micah's face fell once more when he realized she was smiling at Will.

A familiar jealousy came flooding back. Instead of letting it drive him away, though, he approached her boldly.

"That was-" he started.

"Yeah. Stupid, silly," Emily insisted. Micah shook his head, thinking the opposite. "Well...something I needed to do," she said. "Just like now I need a drink, badly."

Micah smiled. He considered how to bring up what he really wanted to talk about. "Hey. I'm sorry if that was awkward…uh, what my mom said?"

"Oh, my gosh, no," she laughed. "I knew she was out of her mind. I didn't take her seriously."

Micah nodded, wondering that she would continue to act like a relationship with him would be absurd. His mom wasn't here, she had nothing to prove. Unless she really believed that only a crazy person could imagine the two of them together. Was it so crazy? Was that really how she felt?

Micah felt deeply offended by this. Also, he felt his heart break. This wasn't going to work, he realized. This was only going to kill him.

"Hey, I should probably," Micah stammered, a fake smile plastered on his face, "I'm gonna skip the drink. It's getting late. I'm just gonna head out."

"What?" Emily asked, startled. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he lied.

"Why are you leaving?" she called. A few minutes ago it might have excited him that she didn't want him to go, but now he found it annoying that she would string him along.

"Not a birthday person," he invented. ""I just stopped by to say hi. But have fun, okay?"

...

Cassandra had never had a worse birthday. Not only had the guy she was sleeping thrown ANOTHER WOMAN a party instead of her, but he was also practically ignoring her. If Cassandra didn't know any better, she'd think there was something going on between Will and his med school study buddy.

The lights dimmed and a cake was brought out. Around the room, people began to sing. To Emily. They were singing to Emily on Cassandra's birthday.

The cake was placed in from of Pits. Cassandra couldn't stand it anymore. Since when did Emily deserve to be the center of attention? She didn't even want it!

"Make a wish!" they called.

-Don't mind if I do-she thought.

Cassandra leaned in and blew out the candles.

"I hope I get my wish," she smiled.

...

Kelly opened her door to find Micah standing before it.

"I thought you were going to that party," she said.

"I went," Micah nodded. "And I thought about what you said, because you wanted me to."

"Really?" Kelly asked. She made herself comfortable on the couch. "It's only been a couple hours, that's not really what I meant by-"

Micah rushed to sit next to her. "I don't need any longer," he said. "Look, if I'm acting inappropriately-and I know you wouldn't invent anything, so I must be-then I need to stop. I would never want you to feel uncomfortable."

"Well, I'm glad you feel that way, but-"

"Maybe I shouldn't have encouraged a friendship with Emily," Micah interrupted. "That's my fault, though. And I can fix it."

"You can't fix how you feel," Kelly sighed.

"You want to know how I feel?" Micah offered, considering how messed up this experience with the new interns would have been so far without Kelly to pull him out of the drama. "I feel like you are amazing. And I feel that I like you. A lot. And I feel that there is nowhere I would rather be tonight than right here with you."

"Ugh," Kelly said in disgust, "how is it that you always know just what to say?"


	8. Chapter 8

Episode 8

Cassandra wondered how she hadn't noticed that Emily was in love with Will before. It seemed so painfully obvious now. It was in her every, simpering look. At first it had seemed kind of exciting - that she was so obviously better and hotter than her nemesis, but the charm soon wore thin.

Will had seemed twitchy all morning. They stood filling out paperwork at the nurse's station when, looking around, he stood at sudden attention, holding out the coffee and pastry bag she had assumed was his.

"One apple fritter," he grinned, presenting the bag to Emily, who had just come upon them. He offered the cup, "Extra sweet skinny latte."

"Oh," Emily simpered. "You shouldn't have."

"Yeah," Cassandra agreed, looking over at Will. "Why did you?" She hated that Emily's attention seemed to be reciprocated.

"He wants my cards," Emily explained.

"I really want her cards," Will nodded.

"What cards?" Cassandra asked, annoyed.

"Surprised you haven't heard of them," Emily said, gloating. "Kind of legendary."

"Legendary," Will agreed dumbly. He gave Emily an idolizing gaze that made Cassandra want to growl.

"Yeah, well," she replied coldly, "the legend didn't reach me. What are you talking about?"

"Well, she makes these index cards, right?" He explained happily. "But, to call them cards really doesn't do them justice because they're laminated, they're color-coded, they're indexed, they're categorized. They've got every piece of information you could possibly want!"

"Know the cards, know the test," Emily advised. "And yes, I made them for the inservice exam. It's a big deal, you think I'd go card-less?"

"When we studying?" Will asked.

"Whenever and wherever," Emily replied, looking like a nerdy hot-shot.

Cassandra tried to push down her old academic jealousy of Pits, but didn't quite succeed. She needed to beat Emily, badly.

"I don't need cards," she said.

"See, that's the thing about the cards," Will continued, "you don't think you need them, but once you use them…"

"Will," Cassandra spoke in her most threatening warning voice. "I got it."

She rolled her eyes as Emily took a satisfied bite.

...

Micah crossed paths with Emily in the hallway and handed her a case folder. "I need you to follow up with this patient."

"Sure," she said. When he didn't meet her eye, she joked, "I scratch your back, you scratch mine: is there going to be a lot of hematology on the exam?"

"Can't tell you that," he said shortly.

"I know," Emily chuckled uncomfortably. "I was just kidding."

"Yeah, look," he said, checking his watch, "I'm slammed."

"Okay," Emily nodded. She couldn't tell if she was crazy (which was a definite possibility) or if Micah was avoiding her. He had seemed different since her birthday party-more distant.

"Hey," Tyra said, interrupting Emily's thoughts.

"Hi, um," she wanted to say her suspicious out loud, "has Micah been acting weird lately?"

"No," Tyra said. "Not really."

"He has with me!" Emily whined. "Like a couple times he's been short. And he's not laughing at my jokes."

"That's not the hugest shock," Tyra teased dryly.

"I just wonder if I did something," Emily contemplated out loud. She had thought over all of their conversations, but nothing stuck out as being inappropriate. In fact, she thought she had handled his mother's mistake about them dating pretty well!

"Or maybe he's got something else going on," Tyra pointed out. "Can't always be teacher's pet."

...

Will answered another question from Cassandra's quiz app correctly and it broadcast its fanfare.

"Okay next question," Cassandra laughed.

"What are you guys doing?" Emily asked, joining them.

"Studying," Cassandra said. "I found this great app."

"App?" Emily squeaked. Will felt himself flush with guilt.

"It's amazing."

"I bet it is," Emily said defensively, "but it's not my cards. I can spare them now, if you want..."

"He doesn't need your cards," Cassandra spat.

Will cringed as she extolled her app's virtues. He had been dreading this moment, but he had supposed it was inevitable. His friend was grade obsessed and the girl he was dating was ruthlessly ambitious, of course they would be fighting to top each other's score.

Having Emily as a study buddy was the key that got him through med school. He knew that all he needed to do to pass this test was stick with her...but for some reason Cassandra was insistent that they study together.

What would he do if they demanded he choose? Make no mistake, they would demand he choose. He could choose Emily and do what he had always done, which would undoubtedly have great results, excepting that his relationship would find itself in the emergency room facing months of rehabilitation...or he could choose Cassandra, the woman he was dating, who would also do well on the test, though Emily might never forgive him.

-Wait, that's absurd-Will thought-Emily would forgive me. She doesn't have a spiteful bone in her body-

"Will?" Cassandra wheeled around. "What's it going to be? Cards or App?"

"Uh, you know," he turned to Emily. She was smiling triumphantly, thinking herself chosen. Will would explain later, she would understand. "This time, I'm probably just gonna go with…the app. For convenience."

"Yeah," Emily breathed, dumbfounded. "Cool."

...

"Man, Cassandra is in for rude awakening if she thinks she's going to beat me on a test," Emily bragged to Tyra later. "Tests are my happy place."

Tyra thought about the geeky-ness of this. "I think I would have actually beaten you up in high school."

"The point is," Emily responded, "Will made a mistake. and he's going to realize it when he grade suffers."

"Oh!" Tyra said, suddenly understanding her friend's epic weirdness.

"What?" Emily inquired.

"This is a Will conversation," Tyra said. "I didn't realize it was a Will conversation."

Tyra was jaded enough to know that no one really ever talked about what they meant. Everything was a code for something else. If the test was Will, then Emily's competition with Cassandra made a certain amount of sense...except that for the most part she was handling their relationship well. So what was really going on?

"I'm just saying," Emily went on, "it was a mistake choosing the app."

Tyra was about to say something, but the scan ended and the lab tech gave his report.

...

Micah walked up to the coffee stand, deeply engrossed in his text conversation with Kelly.

[Dinner later? Thai?]

[Too sweet. Maybe Chinese.]

He hit send and looked up to see Emily. "Oh," he called, having been caught off guard.

"Hey," she said in hopeful greeting.

[Chinese again? Come on!]

"Hey," Micah nodded. He turned to the vendor, "Uh, just black."

"You got it."

[I don't hear you making any suggestions.]

"I, um," Emily said, "I'm having a problem with that patient that you gave me."

"Yeah?" he asked. "What's up?"

-Emily's fifth flaw-Micah thought, adding to the list he had been forcing himself to make-she interrupts people-

[Do I have to do all the work myself? :-)]

"She's got osteosarcoma of the jaw," Emily said.

"Needs a resection of the mandible," Micah diagnosed.

"Right," Emily breathed.

[You obviously care, so just tell me.]

"Thank you," Emily told the vendor, taking her coffee. She spoke again to him, "But she won't do it. She's a model, she's obsessed with her looks-BEYOND obsessed-and won't listen to reason. I can't get her to focus on what's really important. Any advice on how to get through to her?"

-Emily's sixth flaw-Micah counted-she doesn't do it a lot, but when she does make an opinion of someone, she makes it harshly-

"Yeah," Micah answered his own thought, "stop judging her."

"What?" Emily did a double take and glared at him. He supposed he would normally have sugar-coated his words of advice, but avoiding her was hard enough already-he didn't really have the strength to avoid her in a nuanced fashion.

"Obviously what's important to you is not the same as what's important to her," he said simply, taking his coffee. "So, stop judging her for it and try to figure out where she's coming from." He considered adding more, but knew that, much like ripping off a band-aid, he needed to tear her from his life in one, painful try. "Yeah, let me know how it goes."

He walked away, eyes on his phone.

[You don't speak 'girl' very well, huh? Fine, how about Maylasian?]

[That's practically Thai!]

[Well, that's what I want... :P]

"Micah?" Emily called, rushing to catch up with him. "Um, is everything okay?"

"Yeah," he said quickly, "I'm fine."

"Did I…do something…?" Emily probed.

"No," he lied.

-Just made me fall for you-he thought without trying.

"Okay..." Emily frowned.

Micah tried once more to walk away.

"It's just…" Emily rushed again, "it's…you're acting different. Like…"

"Like I'm your resident and you're my intern?" he said harshly.

He saw a look of horror play over her face. "…yeah, but…" she stammered, "I mean, we were friends too, right?"

Micah felt a combination of adoration and annoyance for Emily knowing that she wouldn't let his attentions go without a fight. It meant that he meant something to her...something she needed. It also meant that she was willing to toy with him.

"You want to know what's going on?" Micah decided to be blunt, if only partially honest, "here it is: we were friends, but I realized that being friendly with you is getting in the way of being an objective and a fair mentor to the other interns, which is my top priority right now."

"Okay," Emily nodded, seeming to accept his explanation.

"It's better if we keep it professional," Micah said. He left Emily where she stood in the driveway.

[You win! If you want Thai, we'll do Thai. I surrender.]

...

"You're acting a little crazy," Tyra informed Emily after watching her make a fool out of herself after "losing" her cards by grabbing the wrong lab coat from the locker room.

"I know," Emily admitted, the weariness of her day showing clearly on her face.

"What's going on?" Tyra asked. Emily was nearing her breaking point, and those were always the best times to discover the root of an issue. "You were able to handle the fact that they were sleeping together but the fact that they're studying together is putting you over the edge?"

"It was our thing," Emily finally admitted, frantic. "The whole reason that Will and I became friends is that he wanted to study with me. I was his smart friend! And if I'm not his smart friend, I don't…I don't know what I am!"

Tyra rolled her eyes. Nerds were so very socially retarded and overly dramatic.

"What am I?" Emily begged. "Everything feels so different."

"It's already been different," Tyra stated. "I don't think you've been his smart friend for awhile. I think you've just been his friend."

Tyra saw Emily's face calm. She supposed it was the best she could do.

...

It was the moments that Micah found himself face to face with Emily without warning that were the hardest. Sometimes he would find himself staring at her as his brain idled, which was an honest enough mistake. But moments like this, when the elevator door opened and she appeared before him, sent unexpected tingles up his spine.

Passengers behind Emily exited the elevator around her, but they two were stuck in their tracks, eyes locked. Micah's heart sped in that familiar way it did around her. The way he always wanted to rush across the space between them and throw his arms around her was as strong an urge as ever.

He fought his instincts as they switched places.

"Thanks for your advice earlier," Emily said professionally. "I think I, um, maybe got through to my patient."

"Glad to hear it," he nodded, trying to hold himself in check.

Micah felt relief as the elevator doors began to close. Out of nowhere, however, Emily jammed her hands in, wrenching them open.

"Wait!" she demanded. "Um, this sucks!"

Micah was taken aback by her forcefulness. And turned on. He tried desperately to think of something to say-his mouth moved with the words he wouldn't let himself say-but even had he the courage, his blood was pumping too quickly for him to react with words.

"I understand that you want to keep things professional," Emily told him. "I get that. But this sucks, because I really liked being your friend."

Before he could do or say anything, Emily had walked off. The elevator doors closed and Micah collapsed onto the hand rail, catching his breath.

It didn't seem right, that he should have this kind of visceral reaction to a person who called him "friend," especially when he was dating someone who was perfectly lovely in her own right. He was becoming less sure of his resolve to avoid Emily Owens.

...

Cassandra looked for Will but couldn't find him. Assuming that meant he had gone to the roof, Cassandra made her way up the stairs.

Will was indeed up there, huddled close with Emily.

"Will?" Cassandra called, feeling the jealousy rise. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," he lied. "Nothing."

-Ugh, he reacted like he thinks I'm accusing him of cheating-Cassandra grimaced-as if I would ever worry about that with Pits! He is guilty, though, and there's only one things that could mean...-

"Not nothing," Casandra insisted. "You were using the cards, weren't you?"

"Yeah, I-I was," Will said, looking slightly relieved now that it was known. "Yeah, yeah guilty. You know what? It's like an addiction. You got to ween yourself off slowly."

Cassandra frowned. It was a bad idea, she supposed, to come between close friends. There was no guaranty that she would win. "Whatever," she conceded. "Your test score, not mine."

Will followed her down into the stairwell, though he paused to look back.

"Are you mad?" he asked ruefully.

"I just don't see why you had to hide it," Cassandra said. "If you hide studying with Emily from me, what else might you lie about?"

"Nothing!" Will shouted. "We were talking and then the cards came out, it's not like I planned it."

"No one ever plans these things, Will," Cassandra scolded.

"What, studying?" Will smiled.

Cassandra rolled her eyes. She found herself grinning too. "Just, no more sneaking off. Tell me the truth."

"Of course, baby," Will put his arms on her waist and gave her a squeeze. "I'm really sorry."

He went in for a kiss, but she pulled back playfully.

"No distractions!" she grinned, "I have a test to ace."

...

Will smiled as Emily joined them in the exam room. He would never tell Cassandra this, but he had not been studying with Emily on the roof, he had been telling her about a car crash he had been in back in high school. He found himself very relieved to have told her. There were some things he would always need Emily for.

Turning back to her, he grinned. He was a pretty lucky guy.

"Remember," came Emily's whisper from the desk behind, "this is your superbowl."

Several interns turned around to stare at the nerd who would say this. Will suppressed his laughter.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to say that out loud."


	9. Chapter 9

Episode 9

"I just..." Emily sighed to Tyra as they began rounds, "I feel like I'm in a rut."

"That happens when your life is boring," Tyra agreed.

"What? My..." Emily defended in a hissing whisper, "my life is not boring!"

"See, you say that," Tyra said, "but then there's reality."

Emily rolled her eyes, "I'm not boring."

"Oh no?" Tyra challenged: "Your primary source of entertainment is obsessing about Will who, by the way, is in a happy and stable relationship. The obsessing was cute for a little while, but nothing has happened and it's gotten boring. You need a new guy in your life. And you need to get laid."

Emily was quiet for awhile. So maybe she spent a lot of time an energy thinking about the whole...Will situation, but most of the time she spent being a doctor, which was not boring at all. No, she needed a little change to spice things up - and not thinking about Will was NOT on the table. She shook her head, "Maybe I should get a short haircut."

"You don't need a short haircut," Tyra reiterated, "you need to get laid."

"No, this is about me," Emily insisted, "not about a guy."

"I agree," Tyra said. "Have you ever had a one-night stand?"

"Yes, of course," Emily answered defensively. "It turned into an 18-month-long disaster, but it started out that way."

"I don't want to know about that," Tyra said.

"No, you probably don't," Emily agreed. She had done far too much ranting about the guy who, though perfectly fine, had never succeeded in distracting her from Will. The guy who she had, in a moment of intimacy, called by the wrong name?

"Has it been awhile?"

"Since I talked about Kevin?" Emily asked, still lost in thought.

"Since you got laid?" Tyra clarified.

"Um…no..." Emily lied.

"Liar," Tyra correctly assessed. "That'll get you out of that rut. Hit the reset switch."

"Yeah," Emily scoffed at the absurdity of this, "I'll just walk into a bar and seduce someone."

"Who?" asked Cassandra as the two approached.

"No one specific," Tyra answered.

"Oh come on, Owens," Cassandra smiled, eyebrow cruelly arched, "we all know you need to get laid. It's no secret. Might as well be tattooed on your forehead."

Emily felt she might die of embarrassment. Of course the interns would talk about everyone's sex lives. She didn't know why she had considered herself immune. They were almost as bad about gossip as the nurses. Emily fought back her blush and entered the patient's room.

...

Dr. Bandari rushed from the patient's room in a huff. "In my life - MY LIFE - I have never met a more obnoxious woman." In rare form, Bandari addressed the interns in a non-medical capacity. "I'm not overreacting, she was insufferable, right?"

"Totally, yes," several interns muttered back.

Cassandra had some sympathy with the patient, a clearly high-level professional woman at the top of her industry. It was what she strove to be. It was what she admired most about Gina Bandari.

Nurse Sunny interrupted to give Gina some test results and, exactly like the "insufferable" patient, she held up a finger to silence the interns.

The comparison was lost on no one, and yet it was Emily who reacted. Cassandra watched in annoyance as Pits tried to stifle her laughter behind a clip board as Will hid his amusement with her.

"You were this close to laughing!" Will finally allowed himself to tease. Cassandra was really starting to hate that tone he got in his voice when he was joking with Emily. It was too warm, too attentive.

"Dead puppies," Emily joked back with a radiant smile. "Literally, dead puppies!"

Obviously Will had turned down her advances, but he clearly didn't realize that, by being so friendly, he was stringing her along? That would be its own thing, she supposed, if it wasn't happening in front of her face every day. Will had to pay less attention to Emily...or perhaps Emily had to pay less attention to Will. She needed a new thing to obsess about. Cassandra had a few ideas.

"Will, walk with me," Cassandra grabbed him out of the buddy moment and led him down the hall. She turned back momentarily, "Oh, and that thing? I'll take care of it."

...

"What thing?" Will asked as he and Cassandra rounded the corner.

"Oh, nothing you need to worry about," she answered.

Will frowned, but let it go. Those two would always be plotting something, it seemed. No point meddling.

"Remember that teacher that toured the lab last week with his class," Cassandra asked, "Scott something?"

"Yeah," Will recalled vaguely. "Nice guy."

"Right?" Cassandra said sweetly. "He Facebooked me."

Will felt a moment of jealous panic. Why was she telling him about her contact with another guy? "Wait, this isn't a whole 'I'm cheating on you' talk is it?"

"No," she said simply.

"Okay," he said, feeling better.

"...good to know you think we're exclusive, though," Cassandra said. "I thought I should set him up with Emily. She told me she's looking."

Those were two very loaded sentences. Will tackled the first, "Let's go back up to this whole exclusive thing..."

"You brought up cheating," Cassandra shrugged. "Can't cheat if you're not exclusive."

Will felt himself being pulled into the kind of talk that made him sweaty and nervous. He didn't have any qualms with being monogamous, but this was not a talk he wanted to have in a crowded hospital. On second thought, perhaps loaded topic number two would be safer. "She'd never go on a blind date."

"Why not?" Cassandra asked.

"Trust me," Will said, thinking of how his friend avoided anything remotely date-related.

"Oh right, I forgot," Cassandra said, annoyed. "You're the Emily expert."

"No. It's just, you know," Will stammered, sorry to find himself on the losing end of this topic also. "I've known her for a long time."

A beeper went off, graciously interrupting Will's discomfort.

"All right," Will sighed. He didn't want to leave Cassandra angry, though: "We'll talk about this while exclusive thing later."

"Um, you sleep in my house every night, Dr. Collins," Cassandra said, taking the matter into her own hands. "We're exclusive. Get over it."

She smiled wickedly at him and he felt himself calm.

-Well, that was easy-he thought excitedly-this girl is amazing.

...

"Apparently," Emily said to Kelly and Micah, "if I use mascara my life will change."

Micah swallowed his response, feeling particularly uncomfortable. He heard in Emily's tone her plea for his attention, but he felt also Kelly's eyes boring into him.

"Listen," Micah said instead, "they're shorthanded in the E.R., why don't you help out?"

Emily seemed surprised, but nodded her understanding. "Okay, see you guys later."

He hoped not.

"What happened," Kelly asked, trying to be cool. "You and you protege have a fight or something?"

"Just realized I'd be a more effective teacher with some distance," Micah said, repeating the lie that sounded the best. He worried that the holes in this argument would be seen if pressed, so he changed the subject. "So listen, I got the time off. We're going skiing."

"Our first weekend away," Kelly smiled. "I told you I'm a really good skier, right?"

Micah fought rolling his eyes, "Once or twice."

"Really good," she said, getting into the elevator. "Not a joke. And I don't like to do a whole bunch of 'let's stop in the middle and discuss the scenery' stuff. Just want to go down, fast, hard, meet you at the bottom of the run. You're too slow, I'll meet you at lunch."

"Yeah, funny," Micah said, not amused. It was slightly annoying that her view of him was so emasculating - even when she was joking. Except that she wasn't joking. "Are you serious? I'm a good skier. You're not going to have to meet me at lunch."

The elevator doors closed on her smug, questioning face. He smiled graciously. Of course everything was a competition. That was what he had to just get used to.

...

"It's just like Dr. Bandari," Emily said thoughtfully as she and Tyra walked through the rain to grab a coffee.

"Who?" Cassandra asked, joining them. "That CEO lady?"

"Yeah, exactly," said Emily judgmentally, "and she obvious has no life, just like Dr. Bandari. I mean, how depressing is that, that as a woman to stay on top you have no life?"

"That's why I'm shooting for the middle," Tyra shrugged. "I'll get the coffees."

"I want the top," Cassandra challenged when Tyra had moved away.

"Well, what about kids?"

"No kids," Cassandra shivered. She saw Emily's look of horror. "Such an annoying, cliched response, Pits! Big deal, I don't want kids. It doesn't make me a monster, it makes me a responsible adult who's aware of where her priorities will lie." Emily's look of pity didn't fade.

-Of course Pits would be obsessed with kids-Cassandra thought-just like Will. Ugh, stop those thoughts right now!-

Cassandra rolled her eyes, "You have names picked out already, don't you?"

"No!" Emily lied. She amended: "I'm still between a few."

-Good-Cassandra thought-let's get you started on that and away from my guy-

"Well, you're going to need a boyfriend first," Cassandra said, "and I have just the guy!"

"What?" asked Emily, looking surprised.

"He's a science teacher," Cassandra described. "Cute enough that you'll think you're lucky, not so cute that he's out of your league. We'll all meet at a bar after work, super cazj."

"What's the catch?" Emily asked.

"No catch!" Cassandra said, excited that she hadn't turned the offer down immediately. Maybe Will wasn't the Emily expert he claimed to be.

"One eyed?" Emily probed. "Knob-kneed?"

"A regular guy," Cassandra shook her head.

Emily's eyes narrowed, "Why the sudden interest in my personal life?"

-Because it is interfering with mine-

"I don't know," Cassandra said. "Things are going grew with me and Will and I'm feeling generous. Come on, don't you want someone to hold hands with?"

"That's not what she needs," Tyra said flatly, returning with the coffee. "She needs to get laid."

"Tyra, come on," Emily pleaded, embarrassed.

"Hey, no judgement," Cassandra shrugged. "That works too."

"Sorry, guys," Emily shook her head. "I'm not the blind date type, but I thank you both for your concern."

Cassandra frowned as they walked away. It annoyed her to no end that she was working so hard to make Pits happy. No amount of hard work would give that girl a social life.

...

"Oh, by the way, heads up," Will spoke up as he and Emily waited in the scanning room, "Cassandra for some reason is bound and determined to set you up."

"Yeah," Emily replied, trying to sound exasperated, "I'm well aware."

"Well that was quick," Will said. "Sorry. I told her in a million years you'd beaver go for it."

Emily smiled. "You know me well."

-The only thing you don't know about me is how perfect we would be together...-Emily sighed.

"You are predictable."

-Doctor say what?-

"What?" Emily asked aloud.

"Like, in a good way," Will stuttered, aware that he had said something wrong. "You know, like, relia…" He gave her a pleading look, "You know what I mean, right?"

She knew. It meant that he thought she was boring. No one wanted to be in a relationship with someone who was boring. That was why he rejected her. He thought she was boring.

There were two things she could do about this - either accept herself for who she was and learn to live with Will's pursuit of "exciting" and awful women...or change herself to meet his ideal. Any adult would, of course, choose to be true to herself, right?

"Tell Cassandra I will go on that date," Emily said defiantly. "I'm not that predictable."

...

Having Emily at his side lent a small amount of comfort to telling a woman that her mother had died unexpectedly. They walked down the hall together, sharing their strength silently.

He turned his head to look at her, wanting so badly to talk about his terrible day. He knew he wasn't supposed to.

He saw her look over at him, clearly holding back also. His resolve almost broke.

"I'll get started on the paperwork," Emily offered.

Micah was relieved by this, but his anger at the unnatural barrier that kept him from talking to Emily remained.

The source of the barrier drew nearer.

"You okay?" asked Kelly.

"I've lost patients before," Micah answered shortly.

"I know," she said carefully, "It's just...with your mom sick..."

Micah didn't need this. He didn't need a pep talk from the skiing goddess who would leave him in her wake and meet him after the experience was done. How could her words help at all? He needed someone who would stay with him. Someone who understood him.

"I'm okay," he said with a finality that cut off Kelly's next words. He walked away.

...

"We are going to get you laid tonight," Tyra said confidently, draping garment bags full of her sexiest outfits on the chair.

"It's not about getting laid,' Emily insisted. "It's about...it's about whether a change on the outside can provoke change on the inside."

"Right…" Tyra pretended to agree. Whatever it takes, right? "So, on a scale of hoochie to debutante, what are we thinking?"

"Um, maybe somewhere slightly closer to hoochie," Emily smiled awkwardly.

"Good," Tyra grinned, "that's all I brought anyway."

"You did not!" Emily shrieked, grabbing at the clothes inside as Tyra unzipped the bags.

"Of course I did," Tyra said. "You have the closet of a seventy-six-year-old woman with no style."

"I..." Emily stammered. "Come on, it's not that bad."

Tyra raised an eyebrow but said nothing. Silence was sometimes the best tool to use against Emily, who was great with words, but who over-thought every little thing. She started pulling out dresses, trying to find just the right one.

"Is it that bad?" Emily continued.

Tyra nodded. She pulled out a leather dress and her eyes lit up. "This is it. Stop looking."

...

"Scott, hi!" Cassandra greeted Emily's blind date. "You remember Will."

Will shook his hand. He couldn't explain why, but this guy upset him. Maybe it was that they didn't know him - he could be anyone! He could be a serial rapist! Or maybe it was because the presumption was that, within the span of a few hours, he was expected to bring Emily to bed... He didn't know why the thought of that bothered him either, but he supposed it should be clear to everyone that his friend deserved so much better.

"She might not show," Will said as they sat there uncomfortably. The more he thought about it, the more he hoped she wouldn't show.

"There she is," Cassandra told them.

Indeed, there she was. And all dolled up in a short dress and red lipstick. Will realized he had never seen her bare legs before...or at least that much of them...they were nice...

-Too nice!-he thought-might-encourage-bad-behavior-in-this-jerk nice! And the make-up: it's like she's some sultry temptress on the prowl-

Just as his thoughts were becoming too serious, however, Emily stumbled in her high heals. That all-too-familiar look of embarrassment crossed her face. Will smiled.

"Scott," Cassandra introduced, "this is Emily." She immediately turned to Will and said, "Don't they look cute together?"

Will scoffed, "If you say so."

Cassandra pursed her lips, "Come on, this is a good thing we're doing. Everybody needs somebody."

"Yeah, but I don't think she's into it," Will said. "This just isn't her thing. I doubt she'll enjoy herself."

"She will if she's drunk," Cassandra offered. She rose to go to the bar.

"No, come on," Will tried to stall her. "We should call this off. This isn't right for her."

"Don't be silly," Cassandra smiled. "They look great together. I'll go get shots. No, come on, it'll help."

Will frowned as she walked away to join Scott, who was buying beers. He joined Emily at the table.

"You look nice," he said. "Cassandra went to go get a shot. She wants everyone to do shots."

"I don't do shots," Emily said.

"I…" Will smiled, feeling relieved, "that's what I told her."

Emily grimaced. "Mmm, right. Predictable!"

Will felt his heart fall. "So is that why you agreed to come here?" He asked, feeling guilty. "Is that why you're doing this? Because I said that?"

"No," she lied.

"Okay, because it wasn't an insult," he tried to take it back.

"No, it's a hot, sexy trait," Emily fought back. "I hear guys all the time: 'I got dibs on that one, she looks predictable.'"

Will laughed. "We don't call dibs."

"You know what I mean," Emily said.

He looked at her with a meaningful stare, hoping she would see how much it hurt him to see her deny who she was. "I know you're not a blind date person."

Before more could be said, the drinks arrived.

...

To Cassandra's chagrin, alcohol was not causing Will's over-attention to Emily to subside. It was like he was guarding her pseudo-virginity like a wolf. She tried not to think about it, but his single-minded focus was really starting to push her buttons.

"I'm just not sure he's the right guy for her," Will said for the fiftieth time while watching Emily and Scott laughing together on the dance floor.

"Who care's?" Cassandra said soothingly. "They're having fun."

"Yeah, she's drunk," Will countered. "She's got her drunk smile on. She'd dance with a coat-rack right now."

Cassandra's mask of pleasantness fell. A night with the Emily Expert was not what she had planned for. In fact, it was starting to be a real drag.

"You're acting like you're jealous," she pointed out joylessly.

This caught Will's attention. "I'm not jealous," he said in his defense. "Just protective. 'Cause she's my friend and I'm not sure he's the right guy for her."

-What did that have to do with anything?-Cassandra's mind screamed. He was acting as though people don't have one night stands. Or change. Or have fun. Either that or he was saving Emily for himself-

"She doesn't want to marry him," Cassandra said bitingly. "She just wants to get laid, so…relax."

"I'm relaxed," Will said. "I'm totally relaxed. I just...it's not right to..."

"To what," Cassandra snapped, "to deny your friend a sex life?"

"I'm not...denying," Will refused. "Come one, I just don't think she should throw herself on the first guy that comes along."

"Why not?" Cassandra asked. "He's nice and he's cute, and he'll give her what she needs."

"What she needs?" Will hissed. "They have nothing in common. How can they-"

"I meant getting laid," Cassandra said, choking back her anger. "It's pretty hard to not have that in common."

"I think for some people sex is about more that 'getting laid'," Will tried to explain.

Cassandra felt herself losing it, "Oh, so you're suggesting that saintly Emily deserves this vast and epic love-making, but I'm a slut so I can just go have sex."

Will's head snapped in her direction, "That, no, how are you even thinking that?"

Before Cassandra could say anything, Emily's voice yelled out, "Does anybody have an epi pen?!"

There was a mad scramble to get Scott to the hospital. Cassandra used the uproar to slip out to her car.

...

Micah turned the corner to see a blonde woman with a long pair of bare legs in a leather dress standing in the hallway of his hospital. He stopped to appreciate the sight when a nurse talked to the woman first.

"Wow," she said. "Emily you look really nice."

"Okay I get it!" the blonde said, turning to reveal a face he knew so well. "Normally I don't!"

Micah tried to hide a smile - both at her reaction and at his. It had been a long day and he was tired - tired of medicine and lawsuits and egomaniacs and lying to himself about his heart. He couldn't fix some of those things, but there were others that were self-imposed. They had to stop.

"Sorry," she said, turning to see Micah. "It's a tonnage thing."

They shared a chuckle. Micah had forgotten how good it felt.

"Can I just say…" Emily began.

"What?" Micah asked hopefully.

"I know you want to keep things professional, but I've been thinking about you…and your mom...a lot today. And I wanted you to know that just in case it means anything."

Micah felt his heart melt. For the first time in weeks, he felt complete clarity. He had to talk to someone, and that someone had to be Emily.

"It does," he said. "Mean something."

He gestured for them to go somewhere to talk and she followed.

"What brings you in here, all dressed up," Micah asked.

"Ha ha," Emily said, sitting down. "I almost killed my date."

Micah felt a flare of jealousy, "Almost?"

"Peanut allergy," she nodded. "I had just eaten peanuts."

"Then you...Ah..." Micah tried not to imagine Emily kissing another guy. "That's uh, that's pretty deadly, Dr. Owens."

"I know," Emily agreed. "I'm a dangerous lover. I've been trying to say that all day."

"Well, you don't have to tell me," he laughed through mixed emotions.

"You look like you've had a rough day," she observed.

"You have no idea," Micah said.

"Tell me?"

"Okay."

...

Will tried called Cassandra for the twentieth time, but like all the other attempts, it went straight to voicemail. He was becoming worried, but he had promised to stick around until he knew Scott was okay...and hopefully to give him a ride home...without Emily.

"Hey, Cassandra, it's me," he said to the voicemail recorder. "Scott's going to be fine. They're just keeping him until the swelling goes down, which shouldn't be too much longer. I was thinking I'd come over after we get the all clear. So, um, yeah. Let me know you're okay, alright."

[don't come over]

Cassandra's text made him frown. None of the fight they had started in the bar made any sense to him. It was her fault, if anything, for putting Emily in a compromising and possibly dangerous situation.

[Why not? We should talk.]

[don't want to talk to you]

...

"I heard the lawsuit was dropped!" Kelly said in greeting as Micah approached her in the parking lot after work.

"Wow, word gets around fast," he said. His excitement was tempered, naturally, because he knew what lay ahead in the conversation.

"Now we really have something to celebrate this weekend," she smiled.

"I wanted to talk to you about that, actually," Micah said, trying to find the right words.

"Oh, I don't like that look." Kelly asked: "No Vail?"

It took all Micah's strength to continue, "...You're a great girl…"

Kelly caught on immediately. Her face fell. "Oh, this is not about Vail."

"No," Micah said simply. "I don't think we…should continue this. Us."

"Wow," breathed Kelly, hurt and surprise showing through.

Micah knew he had to push through this, but his heart ached. "I'm just, I'm not…where I think I should be."

"Look," Kelly bargained, "I know there's a lot going on with your mom…"

"It's not just my mom," Micah hated himself for having to clarify. "I'm just not there…with you."

It didn't matter to Micah that Kelly was sweet and interested in him. It mattered that, with everything that was happening, she wasn't his partner, she was a wall he kept running up against. He couldn't know for sure, but he felt that, even if he had not been in love with another woman, he would eventually have broken in off with Kelly for this reason anyway.

"I'm sorry," he told her.

"Yeah," said Kelly, putting on a brave smile. "Me too."

...

"Hey," Will said, running down the stairs to meet Emily as she was leaving. "Crazy night, huh?"

"Yeah," Emily smiled. She was already dreaming of her warm bed.

"You gonna see that Scott guy again?" Will asked. Emily was surprised by this question, and the one that followed: "He just, he didn't seem like he's your type."

He said it defensively, like he was trying to trick her into revealing her intentions. Her intentions for Scott? Why would he care? Unless...

-he's acting a little…-

"I don't see you with him," Will told her. Was he trying to talk her out of a relationship or out of getting laid? Are these the stakes?

-JEALOUS-she thought-he's acting jealous-

Emily experimented, "He seemed nice, though."

"Nice?" Will snapped, incredulous. "Come on, guys like that: they'll take advantage."

Emily couldn't be sure, but that sounded an awful lot like jealousy.

-if he's jealous-Emily followed this train of thought-that means…deep down, somewhere he's not even aware of…he likes me!-

She beamed at him.

"What?" Will asked, not knowing where her sudden joy had come from.

"Nothing," she grinned.


	10. Chapter 10

Episode 10

Emily knew the moment Will went in for a kiss that she was dreaming. Will did that kind of thing all the time, after all...in her dreams. This knowledge didn't hinder her enjoyment - in fact, they were more pleasant now that...

-Now that Will is jealous!-

This thought was almost enough to assuage her annoyance with her alarm, which beeped her right out of the fifth repetition of the same, beautiful fantasy.

She allowed herself to re-live the highlights one more time...the jealous look in his eye, the way he adjusted her hair so that his strong, warm hand could rest on her neck, pulling her in...

So maybe Will wasn't quite as...intimate...in the world of the awake, but she somehow felt closer to him than she had before. It was as though she new something that he didn't.

But then the doubt returned, and Emily wondered if the reason he didn't know he felt something for her was because he didn't. Maybe be was just being a good friend. Although...

-No!-Emily shouted in her mind-I can't go on like this. I have to know-

And then an idea worthy of scheming Tyra struck her. She was a doctor -it was her job to step back and look at things with objectively. She needed to bring science back to her unruly heart. This confusion called for a return to her training...she needed to conduct an experiment.

...

"What kind of experiment?" Tyra asked warily.

"A social experiment," Emily said proudly. Trya lifted an eyebrow and her confidence sank. "I swear, Tyra, Will seemed jealous."

"Of that snowboarding goofs?" Tyra asked. What did that guy have to cause jealousy?

"Mm-hmm," Emily nodded. "And if he was, then that means that I haven't been just imagining things all this time, that there is…something between us," Tyra shot Emily a look and she added, "deep down. I just…I have to prove my theory. I have to see if it happens again."

Tyra followed this thought, "Get the results to repeat."

"Exactly!" Emily said, excited. :I'm going to flirt with someone else, and see how he reacts."

Tyra would never confront a person to his face if she could make a complicated plan behind his back. She was the master of the convoluted scheme. So it was that, for once, she could see no problem with Emily's ideas. "That actually sounds reasonable."

...

Cassandra was waiting for the crowd to break before her. There were too many people in front of her to see the test results, which had been posted minutes before. She considered pushing through, but she was almost too afraid to look. What if she had failed the test? What if Emily aced it?

It was more important now than ever that she beat Emily.

"Hey," Will said sheepishly, coming up to her.

Cassandra smiled prettily, "Hey."

Will smiled back, looking slightly confused. "So, uh, are we good?"

"Of course," Cassandra said. 'Why wouldn't we be?"

"You..." Will tried to laugh through his discomfort, "you told me not to call you..."

"Oh, that," Cassandra beamed, she waved a hand. "I know you're just looking out for your friend. It's okay."

"Yeah?" Will asked, sounding genuinely happy to be forgiven.

Cassandra had given the situation between Will and Emily a lot of thought. A few months ago she might have thought it quite fun, to be going out with a man who her high school nemesis was in love with. But Emily's sad puppy eyes staring after Will didn't give Cassandra satisfaction-it annoyed her. And Will's attention to Emily hadn't become less, despite Cassandra's constant ploys for attention.

She felt that she shouldn't have to work so hard. And that she did have to work so hard worried her...it worried her that she would always live in Emily's shadow.

But there was no quicker way to go from being a girlfriend to an ex-girlfriend, Cassandra knew, than to act jealous. She therefore had decided to play it cool.

"Silly," she said teasingly, pulling him for a quick kiss. Will grinned at this response, but Cassandra couldn't focus on this. The line of test-takers was thinning and they were nearing the results.

Much to Cassandra's annoyance, Emily joined them. Her desire to beat Pits on the test increased to the point where she could barely hear anything over the beat of her heart.

And then, there it was. The results. And...they were good.

"Oh my god, I did it," Cassandra said, turning her eyes from the top spot on the paper, which held her name. She looked at Will, "This is huge!"

Emily said, "Congratulations, Cassandra."

Instead of focusing on her victory, Will put a consoling hand on Emily's shoulder. Cassandra wanted to snarl. Emily got second place, what right did she have to his attention? Unwilling to allow this to continue, Cassandra grabbed him away.

"Let's celebrate tonight," she said, hoping the desperation was well hidden. "What should we do?"

...

Emily felt a strange calm when talking with Cassandra later on their case. It may have been, in part, because anyone and everyone, today, was part of her grand social experiment.

Except for that guy, who she hadn't seen before...

"Who's that?" Cassandra asked first, gesturing to the tall and handsome man talking to Micah and some of the nurses.

"I don't know," Emily said, shaking her head.

"Hmm, he's trouble," Cassandra informed her. "Trust me, I know men. I know the type."

"You should hope he comes back," Nurse Sunny said to Emily instead of a greeting. "Bandari hates him more than she hates you."

"She doesn't hate me," Emily said uncertainly. She looked desperately at Micah, who smiled back. "She…does she hate me? Cause I thought we were more, like, grudging respect."

Micah nodded his agreement and motioned to the tall man, "Dr. Aquino, two interns," he introduced, "Dr. Kopelson and the much beloved Dr. Owens." Smiling at Emily, he explained, "Dr. Aquino and I were interns together."

"Why does Bandari hate you?" Emily blurted.

"Oh, they had this epic fight in the halls! I mean have never seen anyone ever talk to…" Sunny's enthusiasm had gotten away from her. "Well, it was a while ago."

"See?" Cassandra whispered to Emily, "Trouble."

...

Micah went out on the roof, hoping to see Emily. Instead, Tyra sat on one of the blanketed lawn chairs. She was writing intently on the back of one of her patient reports, making thoughtful noises.

She looked up and he nodded a hello. She went to her writing, then turned quickly back to him. "Hey, you're pretty close with Emily, right?"

Micah felt suddenly alert. "Um, yeah," he said with a shrug, trying to be cool. "I guess..."

Without looking up, Tyra asked: "How are you at flirting?"

Micah choked, "What?"

"Oh wait, nevermind," Tyra said dismissively. "I forgot, she pretended to have a crush on you her first day. No point revisiting that."

Micah didn't know what Tyra was talking about, but he felt offended to be dismissed so easily. "Wh...why?"

"I'm trying to make a list of test subjects for Emily's experiment,"Tyra said, answer a different condition. "But I'm telling you, viable men are thin on the ground."

Micah swallowed his indignation, "Test subjects? What for?"

"Oh nothing," Tyra said, still engrossed with her list.. "She thinks Will was acting jealous of her date. It's stupid, but I want to be supportive."

As it had every day he since he had met Emily, his heart fell into his stomach when her obsession with Dr. Collins was mentioned.

Tyra looked up for the first time and her expression changed, as though realizing for the first time who it was she was talking to.

"Oh, wow," she said, sounding embarrassed. "Sorry if I'm talking your ear off. I know you don't care about intern drama."

"No," Micah to himself. "No, I don't care. I just came up here to...ah...how is the patient in 504?"

"Oh, right," Tyra said, nodding her gratitude. "He's good. I mean, he's got a set of keys in his stomach, but he'll be okay.

Micah nodded back. "Good," he said, wondering if he might be sick.

...

Will took down notes as Dr. Putnam talked him through a new patient's charts. Dr. Putnam's eyes rarely rested on Will, but scanned the hallway, shooting his flirty smile at anything with a pulse. He followed Putnam's gaze over to Emily, who hastily looked away.

Putnam's smile spoke of his immense confidence and Will felt his blood boil. It was not as though that presumptuous peacock had a chance with his very practical friend...but then, why had she been staring?

"Any questions?" Putnam asked, looking at him with a faint smile, as though he was repeating a question.

"No," Will said, trying to swallow his annoyance, "no, I think I got it." He tried to focus on paperwork, but out of nowhere, Emily tapped on Dr. Putnam's shoulder and he turned to her.

"Dr. Putnam," she addressed him with an awkward smile. "I was wondering, did you ever get a path on that rash?"

"Yep," Putnam replied smoothly. "Neutrophils and lymphocytes."

"Huh," Emily smiled dumbly. "Steroids?"

"Uh-huh," Putnam said silkily.

"Excuse me," Emily said, pushing past him. "I just have to get a tissue." Her arm brushed up against Dr. Putnam and Will's nostrils flared. What did she think she was doing?

Emily pulled a tissue from the box and brushed against him again. Will's jaw clenched at the sultry look in her eyes. It was the way she had looked at that snowboarding goofus...

Then Emily hesitated. Her come hither eyes were suddenly averted. "It's just to blot my face."

Will felt himself suppress a laugh. That was the awkward girl he knew. What on earth had gotten into her?

Dr. Putnam was called away and Will greeted his friend with a smile.

"Listen, you got to be careful. Putnam's a dog," he said, lecturing as though to a child who was in over her head. "He's going to think you're into him."

"Into him? Like to date?" Emily asked. "No, I'm not into that. I just…I wouldn't mind…seeing what all the fuss is about, though..."

Will felt a moment of confusion. Since when was Emily interested in players and jocks? He felt off balanced and upset, but then...

"Hilarious," he said, the solution occurring to him. "That deadpan thing that you do, gets me overtime."

"Will?" Cassandra's voice inquired.

"Hmm?" Will responded, keeping his eyes locked with Emily as though if he looked long enough he would figure out what she was up to. And no mistake, she was up to something...

"Sorry," Cassandra continued, sounding annoyed. "Can I talk to you?"

"Yeah, of course," Will snapped out of his concentration, knowing better than to keep Cassandra waiting.

"What were you two talking about?" Cassandra asked casually.

"Huh? Oh, nothing," Will said, looking back at Emily and Putnam, who were talking again. Cassandra touched his arm, bringing him back to their conversation. "It's just Putnam and..." Will remembered Cassandra's reaction to his concerns the other night.

Cassandra raised an eyebrow, almost daring him to speak. He was not so brave. "Ah, nothing. Drinks to celebrate the genius of you?"

"Oh, I can't," she pouted, touching his arm in consolation. "I've been called into surgery. So, no drinks, but at least my 'genius' as you call it is already paying off. I should be called into more surgeries now."

"Wow, congratulations baby," Will smiled.

"Thank you," she smiled back.

...

Micah walked to the nurses station to turn in his paperwork and nodded at Emily, who was doing the same.

"Long shift," he said, feeling slightly uneasy in his knowledge of Emily's scheming. He wondered if he could get her to flirt with him, despite Tyra's dismissal...

"Yeah, tell me about it," Emily agreed.

"Got any plans tonight?" Micah asked. He felt embarrassed, though it was a perfectly normal question for friends to ask each other. It was her possible answer that made him nervous...what if she would start dating someone in order to make Will jealous? Would he mind if she did that with him...?

"Oh yeah, big exciting ones," Emily said. But Micah was reassured a moment later: "Putting together a bookcase. How about you? You going to hang out with Kelly?"

Clarity broke through into Micah's mind-she hadn't heard. She still thought he was in a relationship. He was almost glad to be the one to tell her, "Uh, we actually broke up."

Emily looked shocked, "Why?"

-Because I'm in love with you?-Micah considered saying. No, that wasn't fair, there were many things he hadn't liked about being in a relationship with Kelly, starting with the competitiveness and only incidentally touching on the fact that she was not blonde and a total spaz.

He shrugged, but made sure to maintain eye contact. "Just wanted different things."

Emily nodded, completely unaware of the many levels of meaning behind his words. She gave him a commiserating grin.

He looked back at her, eyes full of sadness.

...

"And then Gina gave her this look..." Will laughed, "I swear, I didn't think she could give that look to anyone but you!"

Emily screwed up her face, hanging her lab coat carefully in her locker. "Come on, I can't be the only person to ever piss her off, what about that guy who just came back?"

"Dr. Aquino?" Will asked, grabbing his bag and shutting his locker. "I heard that was epic."

"Exactly!" Emily said triumphantly. "And Gina and I are nowhere near epic."

Emily closed her locker to find Dr. Putnam waiting behind it.

"Hi," he said, smarmy smile in place. "Let's grab a drink."

Will tried to bite back his annoyance, but maybe Emily was into that kind of thing... Maybe he didn't know her at all...

"Oh, I can't tonight," Emily said. Will felt his suspicions confirmed when she invented, "I'm…uh, I'm putting together a bookcase."

"Cool," Putnam said, not getting the message. "I'll help."

"You know what?" Will stepped in, ready to get the creep away from his friend, "I already said I would help her, so…"

"Okay," Putnam nodded, eying Will's superior height. "Another time then."

Will watched him leave and leaned into Emily conspiratorially. "So, is there really a bookcase?"

"Um, yeah," Emily said.

"You need help with it?" Will felt inclined to offer. The residue of Putnam made him feel uncomfortable. "Cause Cassandra just bailed. She had to go in on a CABG."

"Yeah," said Emily, hardly daring to believe. "Help would be great!"

...

"Hex bolt," Will commanded sternly, as though asking for a scalpel.

Emily tried to hand it to him as playfully as she could.

"Wire tool thingy that came in the box," he said next.

Emily looked at Will's hands. They were as strong and graceful putting together a bookcase as they were in the operating room. She remembered her fantasy, the feel of that very hand on her neck.

Will smiled at her, fueling her courage. What about a bookshelf could be flirty?

"What are these?" She asked, holding up a bag of hardware with full knowledge that her idea was pathetic.

"Those are the extras," Will said, trying to sound sure of himself. "Yeah. They always give you extras. Do you have any more beer?"

"Mm-hmm," Emily said gratefully, though she couldn't resist correcting him. "They don't…always give you extras."

Will looked at her innocently and stuffed them in his pocket.

"Oh, you're out of beer," Emily said upon finding the fridge empty.

"That's alright," Will said, "I'm almost done here anyway."

"No!" Emily said, slightly panicked. She wasn't ready to end her experiment for the night. "I'll go get some. And sandwiches."

"Yeah?" Asked Will, looking interested.

"Yeah," Emily said, hiding her excitement at his interest. "It's the least I can do for the guy that's putting together my bookcase so gregariously."

"That would be great," he said. "How about a... nevermind, you know what I like."

Emily nodded at the door and gave him a confirming smile. "Yeah, I do."

Emily left the apartment with at a casual pace, and it was only after she was out of earshot that she broke into a run. She didn't want to miss a minute of time with him.

...

"Anyway, enough doom and gloom," said AJ Aquino, putting down his bottle of beer. "Talk to me about Dr. Owens."

Micah looked up at him in surprise. "What about her?"

"Come on. Really?" AJ asked with his usual, insufferable ability to know when people are lying. "You like her. It couldn't be more obvious."

"It's not that oblivious," Micah said thoughtfully. "She has no idea."

"Wow, that's harsh," AJ laughed. "Dude, you gotta just talk to her."

"I talk to her!" Micah said defensively. "And don't you start, it's not only about doctor things!"

"Dr. Barnes, how do you hold the knife for an endoscopy?" AJ mocked in a falsetto voice. Micah pretended to punch him.

"I even tried not talking to her..." Micah tried again.

AJ took a chug of his drink. "Dude, that's never going to get you laid." Micah protested, but AJ continued, "Okay, listen uncle A here, this is how you want it to go down: you're standing at opposite ends of the hallway, you both turn, you both smile. It's a shy smile, like you're a little embarrassed to be caught looking. You step closer."

AJ kept talking, and Micah imagined it. He would say something funny and she would laugh. Then he would say it-just SAY it, with no though of the consequences...I like you.

...

"Who do you keep texting?" Hot Molly asked.

"Emily," Tyra said, finishing her message with several exclamation points.

"So it's true," Molly asked, "Doc Owens is a-"

"No, no, no!" Tyra laughed. "Like she could ever be that cool. No, but I'm trying to get her to hit on...someone." Tyra stopped herself from saying more. That would be bad friendship.

"You've got your work cut out for you," Hot Molly said, rolling her eyes. "That one's a spaz."

Tyra held out her hands, "I know, right?"

"So that's why you were flirting with me earlier?" Hot Molly observed.

Tyra's eyes grew wide. She stammered, "I...no, it's not-"

"I mean, it's not like I mind," Molly grinned. "I've often felt that I should be used for sexual instruction. I was just wondering if you, you know, had other reasons."

Tyra infused every iteration of the word "yes" into her returned smile.

"Here, lets give her some encouragement," Molly said, grabbing Tyra's phone and pulling her into a sexy pose. She snapped a photo of them together and sent it out.

Tyra regained her phone and sent a companion text that she barely saw, lost in the smiles and laughs of Hot Molly. Feeling brave, she went in for a kiss. Molly pushed back with gentle pressure. They came apart, both smiling.

Tyra's phone tittered and she looked at it distractedly. With a double-take, she looked at it again. The message was a photo of Will, asleep on Emily's couch.

{Tyra, alone with me and he prefers sleep.}

Molly's smile faded at the sad look on Tyra's face.

{Hypothesis wrong. Hooray for science.}

"Wow, what a buzz-kill," Tyra said, looking angrily at her phone.

...

Micah searched the Hallways for Emily the next day. His heart beat faster every time he turned, and finally he turned and...there she was.

Smiling at her from across the hall, he motioned that he wanted to talk with her.

She smiled back, meeting his eye and causing his heart to race. He stepped nearer...

Emily suddenly looked down at her beeper and blushed slightly. Micah's heart did its all-too-familiar drop when he realized who must have paged her to warrant that reaction. Worse yet, without another glance at him, she turned and away.

Micah wondered how long he could withstand that kind of treatment before he gave up on her. He had thought himself ready to move on before, only to fight the racing of his heart when next they met.

Cursing at the world, Micah turned and walked away from the scene of his refusal. Maybe he wasn't ready to give up on her, but he wasn't going to make a fool out of himself by asking out a girl who was in desperate love with another guy.

...

Emily put on a happy smile as she stepped towards Will on the roof. Last night had been her first without a fantasy of him in a long time, even with him laying out on her couch. She had dreamed instead of other failed experiments.

"Hey," she said pleasantly.

"Hey, uh sorry," Will said, talking quietly. It was only then that Emily realized that Will had asked to meet on the roof for purposes of secrecy. "I told Cassandra that I had an emergency with a patient because I sort of, uh…sort of need to ask you for a favor. Kind of a stupid favor, but I figure you owe me a few stupid favors, so…"

Emily felt suddenly very worried. What would Will say to her that he didn't want Cassandra to hear? Oh god, was he thinking about proposing to that smiling snake...?

"What is it?" Emily asked, preparing herself for the worst.

"I need you to not let Cassandra know that I crashed at your place last night," Will said instead.

Emily let out a relieved breath, but was no less intrigued, "Why?"

"Sort of crazy," Will said. "Um, remember the other night when we were out at the bar? You were with that snowboarding goofus? Cassandra sort of freaked out. She thought I was jealous..."

Emily's ears perked up. She struggled to listen to Will's words, but her own thoughts were too loud.

-Cassandra thought he was jealous? Cassandra? Brilliant reader of men, Cassandra?-

"…I don't want to deal with it," Will was saying. "So, can we keep that between the two of us?"

"Yeah," Emily had the presence of mind enough to say. "Yeah. No problem."

"Anyway," Will tried to sound casual, "maybe I should go down first, you know, just in case."

-He's asking me to act like a secret mistress!-Emily thought-Cassandra must be really freaked out-

"Yeah, that's a good idea," Emily said, suddenly feeling very warm.

-He likes me!-She screamed inside-He likes me, he likes me, he likes me!-


	11. Chapter 11

Episode 11

"I never understood spending so much money on a fund-raiser," Tyra said tersely, pursing her lips against any further comment.

Emily looked up to see the impressively large bouquets of expensive looking flowers being carried into the hospital. It seemed odd that she hadn't noticed those before, but then...she had been distracted.

"How much are they trying to raise for Bandari's project?" Emily asked, trying to be a part of the world.

"I think, like, 500K," Tyra said. "That's got to be, like, $10,000 in flowers, am I right?"

"Oh, $10,000 doesn't get you those flowers," scoffed Cassandra, who came up beside them with Will in tow. Emily's body felt an immediate reaction to Cassandra's know-it-all tone, but then her previous thoughts took over, and all she could do it smile. Perhaps noticing this, Cassandra grabbed Will's arm and pulled him towards the hospital, "Let's go babe, I need to hang my dress."

Emily grinned all the wider at their backs. It was all just so obvious now...

"Okay, what's going on?" Tyra asked, fed up with this new behavior. "You just had a Cassandra Will encounter. You don't smile after a Cassandra Will encounter."

"It's because I have the magic eye now," Emily said, feeling somehow excited and afraid at the same time to be voicing her new theory for the first time. Tyra looked at her blankly and Emily's let her collection of thoughts tumble out: "In the books. I used to read them as a kid, you know? You stare at that picture for a long time, and at first it would seem so random, this crazy pattern, and then all of a sudden, you'd see a teapot or something, and then once you saw that, every time you looked at it, it was just so obviously a teapot, it-it," Emily felt overcome with happiness at her argument's conclusion, "It's a teapot!"

Tyra, not hearing all the context in her friend's head, was not amused. "There has to be a more direct way of telling me why you're happy."

Emily put her metaphors aside: "It's just suddenly clear that Will has feelings for me."

Tyra gave her an appraising look.

"I know it," Emily said. "And Cassandra knows it! She is so obviously threatened by me. I don't know how I didn't see it before."

Tyra nodded. "So you're going to make a move."

"No! definitely not!" Emily exclaimed. This was, after all, the essence of her new plan. "When Cassandra's threatened, she lashes out. She's going to lost it on Will. Then his eyes will be opened."

"Wow," Tyra said, looking mildly impressed. "I've never seen you so confident."

Emily felt herself glow with her (if somewhat reserved) approval. "Now I know he has feelings for me, I just have to be patient. Patient plays to my strengths."

"Cassandra has been holding tighter to Dr. Ken Doll recently," Tyra looked around. "I hadn't thought much about it, but maybe there's something to it."

"Look," Emily said, "If she's rude to everyone EXCEPT Will, don't you think he will eventually realize this. I mean, she's a jerk to you, right?"

"Well, nothing too bad," Tyra admitted, "but as a lesbian underachiever, I'm not really a threat to her."

"Well, okay," Emily waved off the flaw in her logic. "But sooner or later she is going to mistreat me, Will's close college friend, and he will want to defend me, because that is what he does. And he's going to realize that he is defending me against his girlfriend, which will cause him to rethink everything."

"If only you could get that research assistant position," Tyra said thoughtfully. "If ever there was a time and place for her to lose her cool, it would be losing the opportunity of a lifetime to you."

"Oh great," Emily held up her hands, "like there wasn't enough pressure already."

...

Micah escorted his mother into the hospital. Without realizing it, he found himself staring at Emily as she removed a garment bag from her car. That must be her dress for the fund-raising party tonight...maybe he able to snatch a dance with her...

The thought was almost too much, especially since his mother followed his eyeline and gave him a knowing smile. The last thing he needed was to tell his cancer-patient mother about pathetic intern love triangles.

"There's a party tonight," Micah said, trying to explain his inattention. "I just realized I forgot to grab my suit from the car. I should hang it up, but I can get you inside first."

"A suit?" Joyce asked, "you remembered to iron it, right?"

"Mom," Micah whined, "the dry cleaners ironed it. Don't worry about it."

"I just don't want you to look like no one is taking care of you," Joyce said.

"Yeah, well," Micah gestured for them to enter the hospital. "Let's just get you upstairs, okay?"

Micah guided her to her ward and helped her get situated.

She grabbed his arm, "so listen, I've actually been thinking about your Emily problem."

Micah felt himself stiffen. "What problem?"

Joyce shushed him and continued, "And I did a little digging, and there's no hospital policy against a resident dating one of his interns."

"What?" Micah almost shouted, unable to believe his mother's lack of common sense. This might require fixing. "Who did you ask?"

"Don't worry, I didn't say who it was about," Joyce said, reading the tenor of his anger.

"Well, you're my mother," Micah said, trying to stress how obvious she was being. "They'll-"

"The point is," Joyce interrupted, "it's totally allowed, you won't get in any trouble…"

"I know that," Micah said, having looked into it himself.

"Then ask her," Joyce insisted.

Part of him knew that his mother meant well-that she liked Emily and wanted him to be happy-but it was more complicated then just "asking her." It wasn't as though she wasn't constantly on his mind... he was tired and annoyed and frustrated.

"Mom, okay, just please, back off," Micah said, letting some of this frustration show.

"But you like her," Joyce went on apologetically.

"It's not happening!" Micah said forcefully.

"Well, it won't if you don't ask her," Joyce insisted.

"Mom stop!" he yelled. He immediately quieted down. "Just back off," he begged.

...

Cassandra read the adrenaline junkie's chart, but she was barely aware of herself or the patient. All she could think about was the way Will and Emily had smiled at each other when they had come into the room.

That was normal, though, right? For friends to greet each other warmly...every time they saw each other...

It may have been fine, except that Emily's smile had a new smugness in it, as though she had somehow gained some kind of personal confidence despite Cassandra's best efforts to the contrary.

Cassandra sighed. She needed to psych Emily out. Luckily she had a couple things on reserve for just such an emergency.

"What's with the good mood?" she asked as they walked from their patient's room.

Emily gave the same infuriating smile. "I got a new teapot."

That was it. That was all she said. What on earth was THAT supposed to mean? What was Pits playing at?

Cassandra shrugged off a strange sense of panic. "Whatever floats your boat," she said rudely. "I just thought you'd be freaking out more."

"About what?" Emily asked, taking the bait.

"The surprise tribute thing for Dr. Bandari?" Cassandra said casually, trying to sound conversational. "At first I thought it was odd that they wanted to include us, but I guess this is a teaching hospital..."

"Cassandra," Emily said, looking over with a satisfyingly scared intensity. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

That's when Cassandra let herself remind Emily who was in charge here. "Did I forget to email you?" She smiled, "Oh, it's no biggie. All of us just have to say a little something about Bandari. On camera.

Cassandra felt the world right itself when Emily's smug smile was replaced with abject fear and the awkward resolve to hide it.

...

"Micah?" asked Emily's voice as he and AJ stood doing their paperwork at the nurse's station.

Micah gave a mooney sideways smile at the pleasant surprise, "Hey."

"Can I ask you a question?" Emily asked nervously. Micah knew better than to get his hopes up, so he threw a warning glance at AJ, who had set aside his paperwork to watch them intently. Emily apologized to him for disturbing them.

"That's alright," AJ said, continuing to study them both with the grin Cheshire cat.

"How important," Emily asked carefully, "is the video tribute component for this evening?"

Micah considered this, trying to feel flattered that he was the one she sought out for such questions. He recalled that Dr. Bandari was considering her for a position as research assistant and knew that he wanted to help her get it. If she was the type to fall in love with her friends, then perhaps he needed to be the best friend she ever had.

"It is a good opportunity to flatter Bandari," he said, trying to speak calmly so as to reassure her. "You know, since she's gong to be choosing her new research assistant any day now."

"Right…" Emily sighed. Her resolve grew, though her reluctance increased also. Micah tried not to imagine the trouble socially-awkward Emily could get into on camera. "Okay, I'll do it."

"Just keep it simple," Micah said, seeing her already over-thinking things.

Emily's beeper called her away, so she backed away without breaking eye contact. "Okay, so…simple," she said, trying to soak in his advice.

"Simple," Micah reaffirmed.

"Simple!" She laughed, turning to leave.

Micah returned to his place next to AJ, who was still staring at him. "What?" he asked defensively.

AJ shook his head and scoffed, "Simple."

"Back off, dude," Micah laughed, shaking his head. "You're worse than my mother."

"What?" AJ laughed, "What's Mama Barnes saying?"

"Hey, she's sick, leave her out of this," Micah tried to focus on his paperwork.

"You brought it up," AJ reminded, "so spill. Your mom is trying to set you up?"

Micah turned to face AJ, feeling his frustration leak out. "She asked someone at the hospital if residents are allowed to date interns! Can you believe that? Now someone is walking around the hospital spreading rumors about me-"

"Are they rumors if they're true?" AJ asked, almost in tears from holding in his laughter.

"Come on!" Micah whined. "My mom is sick, I don't need this."

"You don't get the sick mother card with me, man," AJ shook his head. "And I don't know how much longer I can watch you pine after a girl. Just ask her."

"Has anyone considered that I don't want to 'just ask her'?" Micah breathed. "She's in love with egotistical douche-bag who strings her along, what does that say about her, huh? And where in that mess is there room for me?"

"Wow," AJ said, raising his brows. "That's harsh."

"Yeah, well," Micah said coldly, "that's how it is."

...

Bandari scrubbed her hands for surgery as Will, Cassandra, and Emily lined up behind her. Cassandra was becoming ever more certain that the moment she had been preparing for had finally arrived.

"Now that my project is off the ground, I am going to be selecting a research assistant," Dr. Bandari said, confirming her suspicions. "You three scored the highest on the Inservice, so you're the finalists. Dr. Keopelson, why do you deserve to be chosen?"

At Cassandra's insistence she and Will had practiced these speeches over and over. As a result she felt somewhat responsible for not only her own, but his success as well.

Cassandra could only see Dr. Bandari's back, and her confidence wavered. Barely hearing the words as she recited, she found herself having to yell and repeat things as Bandari turned on the sink.

The blood pulsed through Cassandra's ears. This wasn't supposed to be happening-Emily was the awkward one! She had worked so hard for this!

It was a moment before Cassandra realized the sink had been turned off. Her voice was now painfully loud. Breaking into a cold sweat, Cassandra cut off her words, backtracked, and started again at half the volume. By the time she finished she couldn't look anywhere but at the floor.

Will tried to say something charming to dispel the resulting awkwardness, but Cassandra barely heard. She knew that he stumbled through his practiced speech about his engineering background only because she had heard it so often.

Then it was Emily speaking, and she droned on and on. Cassandra felt Will's body shift closer to her, as though to lend her strength. She leaned into him gratefully for a moment, but then remembered his warm smile to Emily when they'd come in the room.

She shifted away.

"Well, didn't expect you to go on about yourselves for so long," Dr. Bandari frowned. "We'll continue this later."

Cassandra snapped back to attention as her idol walked from the room to take her place at the head of surgery. Her heart ached with desire to be exactly like this powerful, talented woman. A new wave of resolve flowed through Cassandra. This was not over yet.

Cassandra stepped back and looked at her competitors. "Look, we all have to go for it," she said, "so may the best doctor win."

Cassandra stepped it up when recording her on-camera testimonial of Dr. Bandari later that day. She poured all of her desire into the indecorous yet completely true flattery. When Emily walked in towards the end Cassandra didn't even flinch. This was one thing Emily could never hope to win at...she had made sure of it.

Cassandra finished her practiced speech, eyes misty but not too emotional-a calculated choice. Her gaze held on the camera until the cameraman asked who was next.

Cassandra smiled wickedly as the door swung shut behind Emily's fearful retreat.

...

It took Emily several hours to shake off the abject fear caused by Cassandra's eloquent words. She knew there was no way of competing with that-she was too honest.

When finally she felt able, Emily tried again, only to find herself equally flummoxed. This time she walked in on Will filming. He had the entire room laughing, his charming smile making the entire room glow with his presence.

"And that's how Mr. Tameny lost a toe," Will roared, wiping the tears of laughter from his eyes. "True story! True story, honestly!"

"Oh my god," laughed one camerman.

"Oh, hey," said the other, seeing her for the first time. "You're up."

Emily looked at the three men in the room, all this chuckling slightly, broad grins on their face. Her intimidation was complete. "Uh, actually, I'm going to come back."

"No, come on!" Will held an arm out to her from his place in the camera lights. "Let's get it over with."

Emily was desperate to continue putting this moment off, but there was something about the way Will looked so adorable sitting there at the center of the dark room, smiling and reaching for her...No one with a heart could say no to such cuteness.

"Oh, I hate these things," Emily said by way of assent.

"You're going to be fine," Will said gently, guiding her to switch places with him. "Come on."

She sat under the lights and looked into the camera.

"Ready?"

-No! What am I supposed to say? That I don't think Bandari is a good teacher? That I'm afraid of her?-Emily thought.

She gave two thumbs up instead.

"Okay," Will urged her on, smiling at the monitor.

Emily took a moment to catch her breath and compose her thoughts. It was not as though she hadn't been thinking about what to say...but what kind of statement would be worthy of Bandari's research assistant? What could Emily, who Bandari vocally disliked, possibly say?

Micah's words and reassuring smile popped into her head.

-Don't worry about the research job-She let his advice sink in-just keep it simple-

Simple.

"It is n honor to be taught by Dr. Bandari," Emily said with a smile that didn't reach her eyes. She then waited for someone to tell her it was over. When the room was awkwardly silent, she asked, "How's that?"

"Ah…" a cameraman offered, "short."

"A little stiff," Will said, looking up from the monitor. He seemed concerned. "Um, tell you what, why don't you just….just imagine that you're talking to-"

"Dr. Bandari?" Emily finished that thought with a shudder. "I don't want to look scared."

"Me," Will smiled. "I was going to say. Just pretend like you're talking to me."

Emily smiled at this thought. Well that would be simple-just talk about Bandari to the person she felt most comfortable with. "Oh," she said, smiling.

-Smiling, just smiling at him, makes me feel so safe-Emily let herself think about her feelings-it's like he knows that together we can do anything-

Before she had the chance to try this out, however, they were both paged to Dr. Bandari's office.

...

"You have all told me why you deserve to be my research assistant," said Gina Bandari to the three interns in a line. "Now I'd like you to tell me why the other two don't."

Will shifted uncomfortably at this thought. Could she really have just asked them to bad-mouth one another?

When none of them spoke, Dr. Bandari continued, "Medicine is not personal. You have to be able to step back and observe-be critical of yourselves and of each other. Dr. Collins. what are Dr. Kopelson's flaws?"

She could not have asked a question that was more fraught with peril. What are Dr. Kopelson's flaws? Why not just act him to stab himself in the gut?

"She, ah…" Will considered. Cassandra had said 'may the best doctor win,' hadn't she? It was only fair to be honest. "She's too ambitious," Will heard himself saying before he was sure he was ready, "which could be a problem because you want a team player, not someone who's…looking out for themselves."

"Tell me about Dr. Owens," Dr. Bandari said.

"Um," Will thought. This was a much easier question-he teased Emily all the time. "She gets too personally involved with her patients and she lacks confidence at times, which could be a liability."

He looked at Emily with an apologetic shrug, and Emily nodded her acceptance of that assessment. He didn't dare look at Cassandra.

"Dr. Owens?" Bandari prompted.

I…think the ambition thing is big," Emily began. "Like Dr. Collins said, you want a team player, and Dr. Kopelson is…too focused on getting ahead." Will prepared himself to hear about himself, "Dr. Collins is really passionate about saving lives, which is great. But, uh, in his rush to be a hero, he can be rash. He's impatient. He doesn't always trust the process. Which is not what you want."

Emily repeated the gesture of an apologetic shrug. Will felt his pulse rise for a moment, but recalled the many times she had teased him about not waiting for results. It was fair-a thing he had to work on.

"Dr. Kopelson," Bandari continued, "tell me about Dr. Owens."

Will tensed. Though he had begun their relationship with the intention of making the two rivals get along, Emily was no longer a part of their discussions. In fact, they skirted the issue artfully most of the time. Being asked what she thought of "Pits" by her idol seemed almost unfair.

"Overly involved and overly intimate with her patients," Cassandra spat, her words pushing into the room with twice the usual speed. "She gets personally involved, which can cloud her objectivity. Additionally, she's awkward in social situations, which can reflect poorly upon you." Will let out a breath of relief. That could have been much worse. His breath caught however, when Cassandra whirled on him. "And Dr. Collins scored third. And he scored third because I drilled facts into his head, just like Dr. Owens did during med school. I think you want someone a little more self-reliant on your team."

Will was taken aback by this sudden and vehement sentiment. He turned to loook at Bandari who was eyeing him thoughtfully. "I'd agree," she said. Before he could assess what was happening, she added, "Dr. Collins, you're out. You did score third. It was a long shot to begin with." Turning her head dismissively, she addressed the two remaining candidates, "I'll decide by the end of the day."

Will bit in his anger as they filed out of Bandari's office.

"Dear," he said angrily, "what the hell was that?"

Cassandra faced him, Emily between them, and hissed: "You said I was blindly ambitious."

"Which is a fair critique," Will defended.

"No," Cassandra said, narrowing her eyes, "you should have said something that could be construed as a positive, like I work too hard."

"That's ridiculous," Will said. Why would she ask him to put himself in a position of lying to his boss?

"No, it's not ridiculous-" Cassandra began.

"We agreed we were going to fight for this position-" Will reminded.

"With Emily you basically said that she cares too much," Cassandra let the heart of the argument be glimpsed.

Will was so sick of learning that every fight was really about Emily. What had poor, sweet Emily ever done to her? "Oh my god," he said, this time really losing his cool, "are you serious?"

Hearing his anger, Cassandra stormed off. "Whatever, Will."

"You believe that, huh?" Will grouched, turning to Emily. "She gets me kicked out, she's upset. Whatever."

...

Cassandra shut her patient's file with a feeling of triumph. She resisted an excited squeal, closing her eyes and letting out a happy breath instead. Any doubt she'd had about losing Bandari's research position fled from her body. She felt as though she had been unable to breathe all day.

Everything would be okay now, however. She rushed off to find Dr. Bandari. Before long she had been sited, walking with Emily, no less.

-Oh no you don't!-thought Cassandra.

"Dr. Bandari!" Cassandra called, rushing to catch up to them. She shared a victorious look with Emily, "our patient-the daredevil with the detached retina-he has Marfan's."

Bandari looked shocked by this assessment. "Really?"

"Ran the test," Cassandra said, telling Emily for the first time, "just got the results."

"Difficult disease to diagnose," Bandari said, "how'd you get it?"

"He was having palpitations, I did an ultrasound," Cassandra explained. She looked askance at Emily, "Then I started reading through his chart, which read like a slam book, by the way. He hates fish?"

Emily laughed, digging her grave all the further, "We were kidding around. I wrote other stuff."

"Yes you did," Cassandra admitted, "which was at least useful. History of anxiety and joint dislocations. All of a sudden it just clicked for me, and I realized he had Marfan's."

"Good save," Dr. Bandari said thoughtfully. "If left undiagnosed he could have dropped dead." Dr. Bandari turned to Emily with what Cassandra could only assume was a disapproving gaze. "Talk to him about the lifestyle changes he needs to make."

Dr. Bandari handed the chart back to Cassandra, who accepted it as though it was praise itself. She had just won, surely. No first year would be expected to catch such a rare disease.

Being jealous of Emily suddenly seemed ridiculous-beneath her. How could she ever have felt threatened? Sweet little Pits didn't have the tools to compete with her. Cassandra suddenly felt bad about how she had been treating Will. She needed to talk to him.

"Why don't you talk to do it," Cassandra said to Emily, pushing the medical chart into her hands. "You guys are so close and I don't want to hijack the whole case."

With no other words, Cassandra strutted away.

"Hey baby," she said a few minutes later, running her hands suggestively over Will's torso.

"Oh, hey," he shrugged, apparently still feeling ill-disposed to her. How had she let things get this messy?

"I was thinking," Cassandra said with a coy smile, "maybe after the party we can have a little celebratory party of our own. I'll make you an 'I'm so sorry' cocktail."

"Why would you think I'd want to do that?" Will asked coldly.

"I can think of a few reasons," Cassandra looked at him with her bedroom eyes. "I know just how I want you..."

"Yeah, well maybe you should have thought about that before you shot down my future," Will said, meeting her eyes with an intensity that she didn't like. "I mean, all those hours we practiced our presentations...it was never about me, you never meant for me to have a chance. We were practicing for you."

Cassandra heard a certain amount of truth in this, though a truth absent of intention. Had she really been thinking that way? Suddenly feeling uncomfortable out in the hallway. She tugged Will's arm and he reluctantly followed her into the break room.

...

Emily tried to sound positive as she talked the adrenaline junkie through Cassandra's brilliant diagnosis. She felt guilty, standing there in front of him having missed what Cassandra caught. What if she had been working with someone else? What if they hadn't caught it?

Maybe she was being too harsh on Cassandra. They were, after all, partners on the mission of saving lives. Whatever her snake-like methods, she was a good doctor.

"I does mean that um," Emily stammered, getting to the part that would most upset her patient, "you can't do any more strenuous exercise. Ever. I know that it's a big lifestyle change."

"Yeah," he agreed casually, "but I mean, I don't want to die, so…I'll take up a new hobby."

Emily wanted to give him more than that. He was gay and in love with his fellow adrenaline junkie, who was straight. Emily needed to make sure he knew that everything would be okay. "You'll find other stuff to do with Sean," she said.

He looked at her in surprise. "It's that obvious?

"Yeah…" Emily smiled. "Let's just say I can relate to having feeling for a friend."

-A hot friend, at that-Emily added in her head.

"I know he's straight," he said, "I know he'll never love me the way I want him to, but we have the other stuff, the intimacy. That's something, right?"

Emily nodded. That was what she had with Will, right? She had closeness and friendship. She had someone to talk to and tease. There would always be something satisfying about that.

"And nothing has to change," Emily said. "I mean, you've been friends since college. That's a long time."

...

Will crossed his arms as Cassandra closed the door behind them. He wasn't sure he cared what she had to say. He was fully prepared for an argument-for more accusations and suspicions...but her first words quickly made his anger disappear.

"I'm sorry," she said, looking him directly in the eye. "I may have been thinking that way- but I didn't mean to. I just...I want this so badly. I want it so much that I can't see straight. But I never meant to hurt you, Will. And if it means you would forgive me, I'll go tell Bandari to take me out of consideration."

"Cassandra," Will said, his look softening, "that's not what I want."

"Well, you being angry with me is not what I want," Cassandra replied. "So tell me what to do, Will."

Will considered her, his jaw working, his eyes shifting across the room. He sighed, then opened his arms wide.

"Come here," he said, pulling her into a rough hug.

"Can you forgive me?" Cassandra asked, her face smooshed against his chest.

"I forgive you," his voice reverberated through his body. "Let's go get dressed and win you a research assistant job."

...

"Looking good, Dr. Barnes," AJ Aquino whistled at his friend, who walked up to him in a black suit. "Swoon-worthy, even."

Micah laid his suit jacket on the nurse's station and adjusted his cufflinks. "Back off, dude."

"What?" AJ grinned, adjusting his tie, "I didn't say who you were looking swoon-worthy for."

Micah felt his cheeks burn. "I know what you're thinking," he said, shrugging on his jacket.

An out-of-breath intern swung round the corner. "Dr. Barnes!" He shouted.

The intern rushed away and Micah, heart in his throat, raced after. He didn't have to ask where they were rushing: there was only one thing it could be. Something had gone wrong with his mother.

Joyce's doctor could be seen turning the corner down the hall and Micah prepared himself to run after him. A hand grabbed his arm to stop this. It was Emily. It was only the gut-wrenching terror that stopped a goofy smile from crossing his face.

"She's going into surgery," Emily explained, talking him through the diagnosis and the emergency procedure that was about to begin. Micah nodded manically, somehow calmed by knowing.

Micah though through the operation in his head, and Emily, seeing that he was distracted, guided him into the break room where she sat beside him. It was awhile later before he realized that she was still there.

"You should go down to the fund-raiser," he said, feeling the struggle between his desire to be around her and his annoyance with the drama she created. Besides all this, he was determined that she become Bandari's research assistant.

"Micah," Emily protested.

"No, it's important to be seen by Bandari," he argued feebly, not wanting her to go.

"I don't know if you know this about me," Emily smiled sadly, "I get overly involved with my patients. So I am staying here until she's out."

Micah felt a strange lightness flood over him. Yes, his mother might be in some very serious trouble, but he wasn't alone. Considering this feeling, he decided that he didn't want to be alone.

He paced nervously for a few minutes, talking through the procedure out loud. Emily offered other details. He continued to check the clock. Unable to stand it all, he sat back down.

"We fought this afternoon," he said finally, admitting the guilt that he felt for Joyce's current state. "I got angry with her over something so stupid."

It was stupid too, he thought. If my mom makes it-and she HAS TO make it-I'll take her advice.

"Families fight," Emily said simply.

"I know," Micah said, shaking his head, "but she's sick."

"Sick families are allowed to fight, too," Emily offered.

...

"Emily is such a treasure, of course," Cassandra said to her fellow intern Michael. "It's such an honor to be competing with her for this position."

"Like she stands a chance after that Morfens catch you made, though," Michael laughed, lifting his champagne glass in a salute.

"Aren't you the sweetest," Cassandra smiled, taking a premature congratulatory sip of her own.

"When do you think Bandari will make it official?" Michael asked. He glanced at Will who had come up alongside them. "I heard you were out of consideration this morning. Rough luck."

"Soon, I hope," Cassandra grinned. She placed a hand on Will's arm. "Save my place here, babe? I should go say a quick hello to Sara before things get started."

"Sure thing," Will said, nodding his own hello to Michael.

"So how'd it happen," Michael asked, "you being disqualified?"

"Oh, you know, this and that," Will said non-committally.

...

"I, um, I had this tree house once," said Micah as the minutes of his mother's surgery dragged on. Should it be taking this long? "And I used to spend all this time in it. I would pretend it was, you know, the castle at the top of the beanstalk-"

"And you were Jack?" Emily gave him a sad, sideways grin.

"No, that would make sense, wouldn't it?" Micah answered. "No, I was a giant. I used to go up there when I was angry, and I'd stomp around, you know: FE FI FO FUM."

"I am loving this mental picture," Emily chuckled.

"Yeah, well, one day my mom and I had a fight," Micah said, becoming serious again. "I don't even remember what it was about, but I went up to the tree house and stomped on the boards so hard that they...broke."

Emily's eyebrows shot up, "Oh god!"

"Anyway," Micah continued, "I fell about 15 feet and landed on top of this pile of wood. I was rushed to the emergency room. I was fine, really, my arm was broken. But my mom...she was so upset. She was a afraid that I might die and that the last things we had ever said to each other were words of anger."

"Oh, Micah..."

"I thought then that she was being ridiculous," Micah said, "but I get it now. I don't...I know it's okay for people to argue, but I just...I get it now."

They looked at one another for a few moments before his mother's doctor came in.

"Your mother did great," he said.

Micah felt a huge weight lift, "Oh, thank you Robert."

"My pleasure, she'll be in the ICU shortly. Enjoy your night."

Emily rushed up to him and they were locked in a hug. Micah was too relieved to measure the hug for more than it was, though he was perhaps a little too aware of his brain's attempts to analyze it.

Instead, his mind returned to the thing that had been making him nervous...his harsh words to his mother. He needed to apologize. But he couldn't really apologize with Emily in the room...Besides, she still had a chance (albeit a slim one) to win Bandari's favor.

Micah pulled away from the hug, "Okay go, go to the party," he commanded. "Make an appearance. Bandari should see you there."

"Okay," Emily agreed, reluctantly seeing the wisdom in this. "But I'll be back."

That sounded perfect, actually, "Okay." Micah stared after her, more convinced than ever that he was in love.

...

Emily wound her way through the hospital's hallways on her way to the party, but had found herself drawn back into the middle of the adrenaline junkie's relationship problems. Sean said his friend was feeling down and she was more than happy to avoid the party a little longer.

It was no secret to her that the gay man's relationship to his straight friend mirrored her relationship with Will. In her elation at Joyce's successful surgery she listened contentedly to what she thought would be an assertion that everything would be okay.

...But that wasn't what happened. No sooner had Sean said that nothing needed to change than a refusal came.

"That's the problem," he said with difficulty. "I'm in love with you. And you're not in love with me. And that's not going to change…and I want to be someone's choice."

Emily felt her breath catch in her throat. She felt a discomfort settle upon her. His assessment made a certain amount of sense, but then...it seemed so extreme. What was wrong with enjoying a person's company? Emily dismissed herself and walked in a slight daze down to the party.

The tribute video was playing and Cassandra's face took up most of the screen as she finished her absurdly eloquent testimonial. The tribute ended and Emily walked up to Tyra just in time to see the recording of herself give the double thumbs-up to the cameramen. Then the screen went dark.

"Oh…" Tyra said to both her and the screen, "That was…"

"That was so cute, what you just did," a gloating Cassandra said instead.

Will grinned at her, and Emily shrugged back. Before she could say anything, Bandari rushed up to them. "Oh good, you're here," she said hastily. "So, I've made my decision."

Bandari looked at Emily, said nothing, then turned to Cassandra. So that was the decision, then. Emily prepared herself to hear of Cassandra's victory, but she was surprised yet again.

"I'm sorry," Dr. Bandari said to Cassandra, "I've chosen Dr. Owens to be my research assistant."

"Really?" Emily could hardly contain herself. This is what it felt like, she realized-this is what it felt like to be chosen. Maybe that Adrenaline Junkie knows something I don't.

"Why?" Cassandra practically shouted. If Emily hadn't known her so well, this may have been a buzz-kill. "I'm sorry, but this is just…"

"Dr. Owens gets patients talking," Bandari was kind enough to explain, "and when they're talking, they reveal things they didn't think to mention. That's how you figured out the Marfan's right?"

"Well, sort of," Cassandra argued, "but using that information I'm the one who pieced together-"

"I'm good at piecing together," Bandari shot back. Emily only felt her excitement increase at this show-down, "I need the information." She turned to Emily one last time before heading back into the crowd, "Congratulations."

"Thank you. I look forward to working with you," Emily said after her, trying once more to not scream in excitement.

"Congratulations," Tyra said.

"Thank you!"

Cassandra sighed, "Whatever." Her terse voice continued, "She basically just said she needs someone to baby-sit patients. I dodged a bullet."

Without a glance at any of them, Cassandra walked away.

"Wow!" Tyra said to her retreating back. "Ungracious much?"

Emily couldn't help but look at Will to see his reaction. She couldn't have hoped for a better display of awful-ness than that. The tea-pot, it would seem, had appeared.

"Uh, look," Will said apologetically, "she's really upset. She…she really wanted the job."

"Lets toast," Tyra nodded, willing to move past it, "here."

Emily could see Will considering his options. Or perhaps he was re-arranging his thoughts about the kind of girls he let himself become involved with. She felt ready for the next surprise of the day...ready for him to see the tea pot...ready to choose her.

"I'm…" Will stammered, gesturing in the direction that Cassandra had gone, "real quick I going to go make sure she's okay."

Emily could hardly believe her ears. He wanted to check that she was okay? Had he not heard her? "Really?" Emily asked, wanting to drive Cassandra's behavior into his brain. "She was really rude.

"Yeah," Will said casually, as though it was completely normal. "Yeah, but you know Cassandra, she's hurt and when she gets hurt, she lashes out. So I'm just going to go talk to her real quick. I'll be right back in a second. I'll be right back."

Emily felt her magic eye shatter. What if the image wasn't a tea pot after all? What if it was just a random pattern?

"Okay," she said to Will as he moved to leave. She hardly felt compelled to ask him to stay.

"Congratulations," he whispered, moving off in the direction of his choice.

"I'm done," Emily said, staring at his back as he searched the crowd.

"Hmm?" Tyra asked.

"With Will," she said, feeling both incredibly light and immensely heavy at the same time. "I'm done."

Tyra cocked her head at this, but didn't say anything.

"Also, this party," Emily said, "I'm done with this party."

"Seriously," Tyra agreed. "Mission accomplished, right? Let's go celebrate. Bar?"

"Yes!" Emily said bravely. "No! Sorry, no, I need to make sure Micah is okay."

"Oh right, his mom," Tyra nodded. She grabbed a bottle of champagne from the table and thrust it into Emily's hands. "Tell you what, you two get started on this and I'll meet you on the roof."

"You have deal," Emily nodded. She walked to the exit.

"I don't understand," Tyra said. "What happened to patience?"

"Screw patience," Emily said, exploring the new feeling. "Screw waiting. I want to be chosen."

Tyra looked mildly impressed...or she had reached new heights of cynicism? "Done done?" She asked.

"Done done," Emily confirmed. "Why am I waiting around for someone to realize that I'm great? I want to be with someone who KNOWS that I'm great. Don't say anything snarky."

To Emily's great surprise, Tyra sounded impressed. "I wasn't going to."

...

Micah walked into his mother's room, saw her slaying in the bed, and rushed to her side. She looked crumpled and somewhat dazed.

"Oh, thank god," he said, meeting her weak embrace.

"Micah Mouse, I'm so sorry," Joyce cried, keeping a shaky hand on his shoulder. "I don't mean to pressure you, I just want you to be happy-"

"Mom, please," Micah argued, "we shouldn't argue. You were right. I...I over-think things."

"No, I'm overbearing," Joyce argued in return. "I see a chance for my little boy to be happy and I...I don't understand why it hasn't happened yet, but I-"

"I know," Micah said, "I know you just want what's best-"

"-but I need to let you live your life," Joyce finished. "You don't have to tell me anything. It may be my job to worry, but it's also my job to let you be yourself."

Micah held in his tears. "Look, I...the reason I haven't asked her out is because...because she's in love with someone. Someone...not me. Okay? And it poked at that wound when you pushed, and I just...I was so wrong to talk to you like that. I'm so sorry, mom."

Joyce took this in for a moment. She nodded. "You should never be satisfied with being someone's second choice," she said, placing her hand on Micah's cheek.

Micah's expression changed, "Please, don't call me Micah Mouse here."

Joyce pulled him into a hug, "I just got out of surgery, I can call you whatever I want."

...

Cassandra was pacing back and forth in an empty hallway when Will finally managed to track her down. "Hey..." he said tentatively "you left pretty abruptly...are you okay?"

Cassandra continued to pace. She couldn't believe what had just happened. She went through in her head every single person she had talked to in the past few days-every person from whom she had accepted congratulations. It was just too, too embarrassing.

Covering her face with her hands, she leaned against a wall. And Emily! Emily was now being patted on the back for winning HER place.

"Hey, why aren't you speaking to me?" Will's voice pushed through her thoughts.

Cassandra ignored him. She was tired of Will. Not Will himself, but the constant attention she had to pay in order to stop Will's fixation on Emily. Cassandra was realizing that she didn't have that much attention to give. She felt tired and haggard. And beaten.

She fought so hard for Will. She pushed and pulled him to get top marks, top honors, top consideration (only below herself of course), but what had he ever done? He shot her down in their interview with Bandari and probably rejoiced when Emily won instead of her.

"Um, well, look," Will stammered, pointing back the way he had come, "I should get back to the party if you don't need me here."

"You didn't even stand up for me," Cassandra blurted, suddenly realizing that she did want Will around after all.

"What?" Will asked, incredulous.

"Bandari was there saying that my work was sub-par," Cassandra came at him, "and you just stood there."

"Um, wow. No," Will said, somewhat flustered. "First, you asked, and second, she was just looking for a different skill set, which Emily just happened to have. There is no doubt in anyone's mind that you're an amazing doctor."

"Ugh," Cassandra threw up her arms, "you're always standing up for her." Cassandra could barely organize her thoughts. She seemed perfectly capable of expressing anger, but even she could hear that she was lashing out unfairly. Trouble was, the heart of the matter was eluding her.

"Okay, look," Will said, retreating, "I'm going to go back and have a congratulatory drink with my friend, who I am proud of and who I walked away from in order to be with you. And you're yelling at me. So, I'm going to leave."

Cassandra snapped out of her angry tension when the mental image of Will and Emily toasting together formed in her mind. That cozy scene had to be avoided at all costs.

"No Will!" Cassandra called. He turned back to her. "I'm sorry. That just caught me really off-guard. I just needed a minute, okay?"

Will pursed his lips. "Cassandra, what's going on?"

She wanted to roll her eyes, but she fought the impulse. As though he didn't know about the jealous monster that was eating her from the inside out.

"Nothing," she said, forcing a smile. "I just want to go home, okay? Can we just go home?"

"Yeah, of course," he said, offering an arm.

...

Micah was almost as happy to see the bottle of champagne as he was to see Emily, who joined him on the roof.

"How did you know I needed that?" Micah teased her.

Emily pointed to her head and then to his-a gesture of a deep link between them, "Come on."

"So...?" Micah asked, ready to hear news about Gina's research assistant.

Emily stamped in place adorably and squealed, "It's me!"

"Oh my god," Micah laughed. "No, I mean, of course it is, why wouldn't it be. That wasn't me being surprised. Congratulations."

Emily hit him playfully in the arm, "Thank you. And how's your mom?"

"We had a good talk," he said, "I think we're good."

"You were good before," Emily smiled, "but I'm glad you resolved your argument."

Micah smiled too, then looked back at the much-needed alcohol. "What do you say we bust that puppy open?"

"Gruesome imagery, but yes!" Emily, somewhat tipsy already, squealed again as the cork flew across the rooftop. She hadn't thought to bring glasses, so Micah offered her the entire bottle.

She accepted it and offered the toast, "To your mother."

Micah watched as she took a sip and giggled. He couldn't imagine anywhere else he would rather be.

When the bottle came to him, he offered a toast of his own, "To you being Gina's new research assistant. Wow." After drinking he realized the source of Emily's giggle: for expensive wine, it was not very good.

Emily reached for the bottle, "One more," she announced, "to me…being done."

Micah couldn't think what this might be in reference to. "Done with…?"

"Will," Emily said, waving her hand as though throwing off a magic spell, "I am done with Will."

Micah's body went numb. His brain didn't have time to comprehend her words, but his heart understood them perfectly. He looked at her with a question in his eyes.

"I don't know what happened," Emily answered him. "It's like a switch just flipped and I'm free."

Micah felt a sudden wariness. Could falling out of love be so easy? "What changed?"

"I was just…sick of waiting," Emily said thoughtfully...confidently. "I want to be someone's first choice."

Micah could not help but be reminded of his mother's words from earlier. Was it the universe trying to offer him a sign? Was it finally his moment? Micah took the offered bottle: he would drink to that. Taking time to choose his words, Micah turned to her, "Well, now that you're done done, I have a question."

Emily turned to him, ready to answer...but then her eyes shifted to the doorway.

Micah turned to see Tyra who looked utterly defeated. "I just got rejected," she said, sounding shocked, "Badly."

"Here," Emily held out the champagne bottle to her. "Drink."

"Thank you," Tyra said, taking it.

Micah listened to Tyra's relationship woes and stopped kicking himself for taking too long. Emily had no idea about how he felt, and all he knew was that she was newly out-of-love. Her sudden availability made him nervous. What if she rejected him? What if he was too far in the friend-zone to be considered?

He needed to take his time...to do things right...and let her get that meat-head Will far behind her. Mostly, he needed to build a stronger foundation.

And so he would, starting tomorrow.


	12. Chapter 12

Episode 12

Micah stamped his foot on the cold ground, successfully knocking the snow from his shoe but unable to warm his freezing toes. He looked at the dark sky in the distance-a storm was coming.

He could, of course, go inside and away from the falling snow, but he still had hope that Emily would drive up at any moment. When he saw her car, he approached, heart racing. He knew he had to strike a careful balance with her…something friendly but also flirty.

Micah felt anxiety with this thought. He was not good at flirty.

Emily moved from the front of her car to the back, popping the trunk and taking several bags from it. He could see the logo of an office supply store on the side of each bulging bag.

"So, you're Bandari's research assistant slash gofer?" Micah asked, feigning a confidence he didn't quite believe.

"Well, I get my own office," Emily explained, "so I needed a few things."

"A few hundred?" Micah teased, grabbing half of the bags and measuring their heft.

"Organization equals peace of mind," Emily said. As she said it, one of the bags broke, spreading her recent purchases across the snowy ground. "No!" she cried, bending down to pick them up. "There's nothing worse that wet office supplies!"

Micah laughed at this as he joined her. It was definitely something Emily would say. "Really? Nothing?"

She smiles and looks up and nods, but not at him.

It was with great annoyance that Micah saw Will Collins at the other end of Emily's smile and nod. Will returned her gesture in kind and Dr. Kopelson looked how the exchange made Micah feel: jealous.

Had Emily forgotten what she had said the previous night? "So," he said as a reminder, "how do you feel the, uh, morning after? Still totally over…"

"Totally," Emily said before Micah could finish. "Totally. Totally."

Micah took this in. Was it confidence or lack thereof that could cause such stalwart denial? "Three 'totallys,' wow…" he teased, "are you sure that's not just, like, the colored labels talking?"

"Uh-uh," Emily shook her head. "It's the happiness talking. I feel free. It's even better than getting a new label maker, which I also did."

Smiling, Micah stood, office supplies now rescued, and the two continued towards the door.

"What's with all the snow, huh?" Emily asked, brushing the wet flakes from her coat.

"Ah yes, your first Colorado winter," Micah grinned. "It's a snow storm. Or, so the meteorologists say."

"I've seen snow before," Emily said with a grin. "In fact, I was the snow-man building champion of my middle-school class."

"Wow," Micah said, agog, "um, wow, I'm pretty sure that's not a thing."

"What?" Emily said in mock-surprise. "I worked really hard on Frosty Junior. I even found the perfect sticks so that his arms could have elbows AND the correct number of fingers. It's all about the details, you know."

"The perfect sticks, huh?" Micah grinned, shaking his head.

-You're perfect-he thought.

….

"Okay come on, we got to snap out of it, all right?" Will said, his voice breaking through Cassandra's noisy thoughts. She couldn't be so easily distracted. She had noticed his nod and smile to Emily as she always had, AND, as she always had, she felt wretched about it, but today was different. Today she had finally had enough.

"...we're at work now," Will was saying. "Your not getting that research position, it's not a reflection on you as a doctor. Emily had a particular skill set Bandari was looking for."

Cassandra cringed. Not only had he already said this, but he was saying it in a way that DID NOT make her feel good. "I know why Emily was chosen, Will," Cassandra said, her voice full of warning. "Don't need to hear you singing her praises right now."

"I'm just saying..." Will said.

"I know what you're saying and I don't like it," Cassandra replied. Of all the million things he could say or do to make her feel better, talking about Emily was not one of them. It seemed like all they ever talked about anymore was Emily. "Any of it," she added, "your whole thing with Emily."

"How'd this become about me and Emily?" Will asked dumbly.

Cassandra almost lost it, "You brought her up!"

"I was trying to make you feel better," Will said.

"Well, your thing with Emily doesn't make me feel better," Cassandra said. She felt the conversation heading in a bad direction, but she wasn't sure what yet lay at the end.

Will looked uncomfortable, like she had hit too close to a nerve. "Quit saying 'my thing with Emily,' alright? I don't have a thing with Emily. We're friends. I told you, that's it."

"But that's not it," Cassandra argued. "Because she's in love with you. I mean…can't you understand how that might make me feel a little uncomfortable?"

Will seemed to consider this, but it felt a little late for such thoughts. Cassandra knew that Will claimed disinterest in his friend, but that didn't stop her from feeling that there was a connection between them that went beyond friendship. Furthermore, whatever Emily might think of things, Will clearly was flattered at the attentions of Pits. Cassandra understood this well enough, having been the focal point of many a professed crush, but it felt quite different now. It sucked.

"Yeah, okay," Will nodded, trying to appease her. "Yes, of course. It's just, you never said anything."

Cassandra told him, "I'm saying it now." She walked past him to order a coffee.

...

"So do you hold with the packing technique," Micah inquired, "or were you more of a roller?"

"Well, roll the bottom layer, obviously," Emily said knowledgeably, allowing their joke to continue, "then play it by ear. If the bottom layer is too big, you're not going to be able to lift a fully-rolled second layer, but if you pack it, it might not get big enough, and the proportions will be ruined."

"Wow, alright," Micah nodded his contribution. "Who knew snowmen were so complicated?"

She scoffed theatrically, "And you thought human anatomy was hard!" Then, Emily spied the numbered door of her new office. "Ooh, here it is..."

"Got to say," Micah said as she pushed the door open, "it's pretty cool that you get your own, uh….medical supply closet..."

Wow. Not an office...though certainly a larger closet, and fully stocked for the needs of a major hospital. A small desk and absurdly large chair had been shoved inside.

Emily recovered in a moment. "Okay, well," she said, looking around, "it's not grand, but I have a filing cabinet, desk…an enormous chair."

"An abundance of catheters," Micah nodded, "which, you know, every office needs."

"Well, they didn't have them at the office supply store," Emily joked, "so thank goodness they're here."

Micah smiled, imagining Emily working among the medical supplies, papers spread across the desk...practically sinking into that boat of a chair... It wouldn't do. "You need a new chair," he said conclusively. "I'll get you a chair."

"You have that kind of pull?" Emily looked at him desperately.

"I know a guy," Micah said, affecting a tough accent.

Emily endeavored to look impressed, "Wow."

Micah turned only to find Will blocking the doorway. Awkwardly, they switched places. Now Will stood inside and Micah out, not an arrangement he felt comfortable with. He certainly didn't want to leave them alone together.

"Welcome," Emily greeted the newcomer. "Hold all snarky comments, I know it's small. It smells like rubbing alcohol, but I don't care. I have a desk."

"…a gigantic chair," Will said.

Micah felt himself tense, but at these words, Emily looked past her one-time crush and looked at him.

"Micah's getting me a new one," she said, voice full of confidence in him.

"Yeah," he nodded, walking off.

-She's over him-he had to tell himself-it doesn't matter if they're alone together because she's over him-

...

Emily finished giving Will his instructions for organizing her new office and he hesitated. He hadn't come to Emily's space in order to hang out with her-though that was just fine with him-he had come to warn her. It was a thing he thought best to do right away, before anything else happened.

"So listen," he began, "I wanted to give you a little heads up about something." Will knew the conversation would be awkward, but he also knew it had to be done. "Um, so, you know, Cassandra is still really bummed about not getting the position..."

"I'm not going to flaunt my label maker," Emily kidded, holding up a still-packaged label machine, "if that's what you're implying."

"No, I…" Will smiled, biting back the urge to tease her dorkiness, "I didn't think that you would." Will's discomfort grew, "It's also just that she's a little bit sensitive about us, you know, being such good friends. And that fact that you…you know, you have feelings for me and stuff."

Emily waved her arms in the air, trying to get his attention, "Will…"

"I just think going forward, I should…" Will started. But Emily motioned for him to stop, and he did.

"Um…I wasn't gonna make an official announcement about this," Emily said carefully, "but…what the hell: I'm over you."

Will had been prepared for awkwardness or perhaps even a little indignation, but what he did not expect was this straightforward declaration.

"You are? Oh," he stammered, feeling immensely off-balance. "Gr…really?"

"Mm-hmm," Emily nodded, her face full of confidence, "really."

"Oh," Will said. He hadn't realized until that moment how much the knowledge of Emily's feelings had affected him. It almost felt like the removal of one of his legs-one of the things that propped him up and allowed him to function.

A fleeting thought passed through his head-a thought that gave credence to the phrase "your thing with Emily." He didn't have a thing with Emily...did he?

"I love how hard it is for you to imagine that I wouldn't worship you," Emily was saying.

"No, I wasn't…" Will stammered, "that's not what I was thinking."

"I don't know," Emily said, "I'm over it. Something clicked." With no further explanation, Emily pointed Will to the given task. "Now, make yourself useful. I want everything left of the saline lavages off the shelf."

Will turned away, ready to take up his task but deep in thought. What did it mean that she was "over" him? To what extent had her feelings for him boosted his ego-made him feel manly and desirable? What would it mean to have that once unexpected declaration of love taken away?

He felt suddenly adrift-suddenly without a tether. Even when the competitive Cassandra put him in his place, there was always Emily and her unconditional love.

...

Emily was showing Will how to organize her filing cabinet when Cassandra showed up in the doorway. It was only then that Emily realized how Will would have had to abandoned Cassandra in the locker rooms in order to come warn Emily about his girlfriend's grudge. She felt the familiar desire to read into this, but she fought it. And she won.

-It's all in the perks-Emily thought-of being over him-

"Oh, Will," said Cassandra upon seeing them. Her snake eyes scanned the room with disdain. "Well, Clearly Bandari chose the right person for the job. I'd make a terrible secretary."

Emily was saved from responding to this by Micah, who had returned with a normal-sized rolling chair.

"Sorry, hey," he said to Cassandra, who was blocking his way. "Well, a little tight, huh?"

"Yeah, uh," Will said with a look to Cassandra, "I think one more person in here and we'd probably violate a fire code, so, uh…we should get out of here. Catch you later?"

Emily nodded serenely, "Mmh-hmm."

Emily smiled at their retreating figures. It wouldn't help, now that she was over him, to read too much into their relationship. As Will's friend, she cared about the health of his relationship, but it was only a passing interest in his happiness, not a secret desire that they fail.

With a strange new confidence, she brushed the thought aside. She'd had enough drama to last a whole year.

"So…" Micah said, "your chair."

Now this was something to get excited about! "Awesome!" Emily squealed, throwing her arms up in triumph. Of course Micah would come through. Now there was a person who didn't cause drama.

"And," Micah continued, "I brought you a view."

Emily watched from her new chair as Micah pinned up a poster of a tropical landscape with the words SKIN CANCER in bold letters across the top. "Okay now," he instructed, "just try to ignore all the skin cancer stuff and just enjoy the nice tropical scene."

"What…skin cancer is that?" Emily followed his lead. "I don't see anything about skin cancer. I just see paradise. Where do you think that is?"

"Some island," Micah said, "I think it's, uh, St. Something."

"Yup, St. Something," Emily said, imagining herself in a boat as it bobbed in the clear blue water. "I've always wanted to go there."

Emily looked over at Micah and he returned her look. She felt lucky to be able to call him a friend. She could be calm with him. Nerdy and calm.

But then, of course, Emily had no sooner had this thought when an emergency came upon them. There had been a bus crash and Chief Dupre, for some unfathomable reason had assigned Emily to triage.

...

Micah shined his light into the old man's eyes, watching for his pupils to dilate. His head had stopped bleeding on its own and he seemed to be functioning just fine.

"We'll keep you for monitoring," Micah told him, motioning for the nurse to take over, "but your head looks just fine."

"Thanks, Doc," said the man. The nurse helped him stand. He took a pink post-it note out of his pocket and handed it to Micah, "Oh, here."

"Um, thanks..." Micah looked at the scrap of paper in confusion.

"Dr. Owens set up a color system," the nurse explained. "They'll be coming in with colors stuck to them today."

Micah nodded as the nurse left and looked down at the note, which stuck to his thumb. Then he looked away-it wouldn't do to be caught staring at a post it note with a goofy smile.

Instead, Micah went down to the Emergency Room. He spied Emily talking to two patients and approached.

"Tell me where to go, boss," he said.

Emily looked up at him, "Bay three-I'm worried about a potential retroperitoneal bleed."

"Gotcha," Micah nodded. He couldn't resist adding: "Uh, the Post-it notes are a very nice touch. I might have to recommend you handle triage every time."

"No!" Emily said seriously. "After this I'm going to need at least a week in St. Something."

She smiled and he smiled back. He wondered if it meant something that she remembered their little bit of silliness in the middle of a crisis. He tried not to read too much into it, but he was sure his heart was beating faster than it ought as he examined the patient in bay three.

...

Cassandra stood behind Emily as the scans of her patient's brain were being taken. She had put her own case on hold because she knew Emily's patient had greater need, but professional courtesy didn't stop her from standing impatiently behind her nemesis, tapping her foot in at a volume that was only just audible.

"Thanks for letting me..." Emily began.

"Head trauma trumps intra-abdominal abcess," Cassandra said coldly. "Don't need to be the research assistant to know that."

Cassandra went back to foot tapping. She wondered if Emily was thinking about her-congratulating herself on her victory-rubbing it in with her innocent smiles. Or maybe she was thinking about Will-Cassandra's boyfriend-perhaps even mid-way into an idle daydream where he lead her to his bedroom.

Cassandra shivered. What was wrong with her? Will said there was nothing going on, and she believed him. Didn't she?

The scans were completed. Before Emily could say anything, Cassandra went to fetch a wheelchair. As she pushed it into the room, Emily was helping her patient out of the imagining machine.

"But it doesn't even hurt," Dan said sheepishly.

"Maybe not," Emily told him as Cassandra set the chair's brakes, "but blood is collecting on your brain. When the neurosurgeon gets here he's going to put a shunt in to drain it, but in the meantime we got to get you into a room."

Emily asked if they could call someone and Cassandra walked around the wheelchair to steady Dan's arm. He hesitated.

"I'll just, uh…" Dan mumbled, "have sur-surgery and, uh…"

Cassandra saw Dan weave unsteadily and, in surprise, guided him to lay down as he fell unconscious. She took out a flashlight and lifted his eyelids.

"Pupils are blown," she said. "The blood is building up too fast."

"We've got to get him into surgery," Emily said, shaking her head in concern.

"Neurosurgery's not here yet," Cassandra reminded.

"Dan," Emily called to her patient, trying to hide her panic, "can you hear me?"

"No, he's obtunded," Cassandra answered for him. The seriousness of the situation fell on her. "If we don't evacuate the bleed, he's going to die."

"I know," Emily admitted, finding her calm confidence. "Get him on his back."

Emily's confidence caused Cassandra's to fizzle. She pushed Dan onto his back. She listened to Emily, who had dialed up the nurses.

"Hi, this is Dr. Owens," she said, "I need a nurse in Imaging with antiseptic, razor, bandages, and a scalpel."

Scalpel? Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Cassandra was too scared to even worry about disguising her fear from Emily.

"What are you doing?" Cassandra asked, pleading with reality. She couldn't possibly intend to attempt brain surgery in the imaging room...

"We have to drill a burr hole," Emily answered. Cassandra felt the horror run through her body. Emily read this and laid out her argument: "There's no one else to do it!"

Cassandra felt as sluggish as if she was in a dream. Her uncertainty and fear were paralyzing. She looked to Emily for guidance.

"I'll prep him, you get the drill," Emily demanded. Cassandra could barely comprehend this request. She hesitated, but Emily commanded: "Go!"

Cassandra rushed through the room and to the cabinet where the drill was kept. As she wheeled it back to the room, she took deep steadying breathes.

Emily and the nurse had shaved and sanitized Dan's temple. "You got it?" Emily asked, holding Dan's head steady for her.

"Yeah…" Cassandra said, holding the drill up in her shaky hands. Her eyes focused on the drill's sharp point. She realized with a sickening sinking feeling that she was about to aim this directly into a man's brain. What if she used the wrong pressure? "He's your patient," Cassandra said suddenly, pushing the drill towards Emily, "you do it."

Emily didn't flinch. She drilled the hole and the excess blood drained. The nurse eyed Cassandra suspiciously, and she looked away, full of shame and disgust.

Cassandra was vaguely aware of the nurse commending Emily for her bravery. As though in a haze, she helped Dan into a chair and allowed the nurse to wheel him into a room.

At her first opportunity, Cassandra bolted to a bathroom on the other side of the hospital and cried.

...

Will walked through the ER, looking for Emily. A nurse pointed him towards a closed curtain, and sure enough, there she stood with a blind man and his dog.

"Nice job triaging, Dr. Owens," he said in congratulations. "Where do you need me?"

Emily said nothing, but turned her sad puppy eyes to Will. He looked from her to the dog, who wore a similar look.

"What are you about to get me into?" Will asked.

Emily led the blind man through the hospital as though taking them for exercise, and at the last moment swerved into her new office. Will went to the roof to call a vet for instructions, and on the way to her office grabbed an IV drip.

"Vet said he's sending a pet ambulance as soon as the roads clear," he said, entering sneakily into the room. "In the meantime he wants us to push 32 milliliters per hour lactated ringer's drip."

Emily pulled a bag from the shelf, looking proud of herself. "Thank goodness I organized."

"Easy does it baby," Will spoke soothingly to the dog as he fed the tube into its system. His eyes flicked up to Emily. "I don't know how you got me mixed up in this."

"It was the dog's sad eyes," Emily explained. Will laughed. Not quite.

Minutes later, stopping for only a minute to stroke the dog's soft fur, Will and Emily snuck out.

"Just for the record," he said, unsure why he felt compelled to share, "it wasn't the dog's sad eyes. It was your sad eyes."

Emily smiled-a somewhat mocking smile that he hadn't often seen.

"What?" Will asked.

"That's just the kind of thing that you would say to me," Emily explained jovially, "and then I'd go home and obsess about it." Will swallowed, and Emily continued: "It's nice...being over you."

Will forced an awkward smile, and watched her intently as she walks away. Why did his chest feel tight? And why HAD he felt compelled to mention her "sad eyes"? Before her declaration of love he had probably said things like that without intending to...but after he'd known...hadn't he been trying, however unconsciously, to feed her feelings?

It all sounded absurd, right? Why would he string along his best friend? Will was sure it was all just a misunderstanding.

"What was that all about?" Cassandra asked from behind him. Will felt his heart drop. His mind began working on excuses for whatever was making her angry this time.

"Hmm?" Will asked, deciding to being with innocent ignorance. "What?"

Cassandra saw right through this. She scoffed and turned.

"No, wait, wait, wait," Will dropped the act and rushed after her. "Hold on a second. Where are you going?"

Cassandra launched into the offensive: "I tell you I feel weird, and then you come out of her office all whispery?"

This one, at least, Will could handle: "Listen, uh, there's a…" he got close to Cassandra and dropped his voice, "there's a dog in there. A blind guy's dog. We've got it hooked up to an IV until the vet comes. You've got nothing to worry about."

"This is you being more sensitive?" Cassandra asked contemptuously.

"Well, yeah," he said. Cassandra turned to leave again. Seeing that only one thing would satisfy her, Will decided to play his final card. "Hey, whoa, hold on a second. I have new information, okay?"

Cassandra turned, shooting him an expectant look. Will tried to express the words he was barely able to understand himself: "Emily's over me. She just told me," he lied. "That's what she said. I believe her, so…"

His lack of encouraging words was interrupted by the tweeting of his beepers. He gave Cassandra a shrug to display his reluctance to leave.

"We're all good?" Will asked.

He waited only long enough to see the beginning of her nodded smile, then dashed off into the hospital.

...

Things were not all good. Cassandra hadn't even had a chance to flash her fake smile before Will shot off like a flash. She felt herself crumble. His reaction said everything: she had become the clingy girlfriend. Fear shot through her again.

Cassandra was still considering this when Emily walked up to her some time later.

"Hey," Cassandra said first, feeling subdued.

"Hey," Emily said in return.

"How's your Marine?" Cassandra asked, mildly curious.

"Still waiting on neurology," Emily answered. She cleared her throat, "Hey …are you okay?"

Cassandra turned to her. Why would Emily care if she wasn't feeling good? "What?"

"Just..." Emily stammered, "you gave me the drill. That's not you. You don't…you don't give away drills."

Cassandra felt her throat contract. It was unnerving to have her emotions so openly on display that even her nemesis was taking pity on her. "He was your patient," Cassandra said with a sad finality.

"Okay," Emily nodded, clearly not convinced. "I'm…just checking."

Cassandra couldn't have spoken if she had wanted to. How could she tell her fears and jealous emotions to the person so near the core of the issues? Luckily she was spared answering by a nurse calling them to help.

Cassandra followed and chipped in her effort, but Emily had it under control and she let the hospital bed rush down the hallway without her. It was only after stopping that she realized she stood in front of Emily's office door.

Eyeing it suspiciously, Cassandra stepped tentatively nearer. This would have been her office, had things gone differently. She would have had the position and the confidence that came with being chosen. Emily would have looked to her to drill into people's skulls.

Cassandra swallowed and stepped nearer. She placed a trembling hand on the handle and twisted it. Instead of Emily's empty room, however, she saw two occupants: a blind man and his dog.

Will was telling the truth. The dog was hooked up to a fluid drip and looked up at her with chocolaty sad eyes.

"Hello, visitor," said the man. "I hope you're one of the friendly ones."

"I'm Dr-I'm Cassandra," she said.

"I'm so pleased to meet you," he said, gesturing down to his dog. "And so is Chet, aren't you Chet? Now that we know each other, tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing is wrong," Cassandra said, trying to convince herself.

"Come now, a blind man can see more than other people sometimes," he chided gently. "I promise I won't tell."

"That's sweet of you," Cassandra said, "but it's nothing more than a rough day."

"You want to know what works wonders for a rough day?" The man asked. "Falling in love with a good old dog. Come on over here and give Chet a good stroke."

"I should get going," Cassandra said, feeling uncomfortable. "There's still a lot to do-"

The man didn't say anything, but Chet lifted his head and looked at her, letting out an adorably pathetic whine. Cassandra felt the ice in her heart melt.

Approaching the dog slowly, Cassandra lifted a hand to his golden fur. Chet lunged instead and licked her arm with his warm, broad tongue. Cassandra laughed. "He's kissing me," she giggled to Chet's owner.

"He likes you," the man explained. "He only licks the good ones."

"He's so cute," Cassandra said, running her hands along his furry body. "I never had a dog growing up. My brother was allergic..." Ugh, this train of thought wasn't much better...Chet nosed at her hand when the sad memory caused her to cease petting him. She smiled broadly.

"That's a shame," the blind man said. "Dogs make the best friends. They live only in the moment, you see. There's no fear about the future, no regret about the past. Just right here and right now."

Cassandra nodded at this as she continued running her hands through Chet's golden fur. Is that what she was doing-living in the past and future? Will had turned Emily down. He had chosen Cassandra. What was the purpose of denying their shared past? There was nothing she could do about it-it was part of the package that was Will. And the research assistant position too was in the past. It would hurt for awhile, maybe, but if she focused on her failure and continued making mistakes like handing over drills, she would miss out on all such opportunities in the future.

She smiled at the two stowaways with the most warm smile she'd had in weeks.

...

Micah tried to keep equal watch on Emily and at the girl's arm that he was assisting to operate on. The vascular surgeon was on his way, but the roads were still blocked and the best they could do in the emergency situation was operate as per Dr. Hewitt's instructions over the phone, which Emily relayed.

None of this was particularly worrisome to Micah or AJ, who were assisting. If they could operate on vital internal organs, something as basic as an arm should pose no challenge. Dr. Bandari, however, took the operation as seriously as if she was replacing a patient's heart.

"Done," she said after Emily's instructions stopped. "I think it looks good."

Micah nodded, "It looks good."

"It looks good," Emily said into the phone, "it looks good."

Micah smiled broadly at Emily before realizing she couldn't see it with his surgical mask on.

Then the beeping started. He looked down to see blood oozing between the exposed muscles. "We got a bleeder," he said, suddenly fully aware of the gravity of the situation. "I'm not sure where. Brachial?"

"Microvascular clamp," Bandari demanded.

"She's bleeding out," Emily said into the phone.

"Okay," Micah assessed, "figure eight didn't hold."

"Where's the bleeder? I can't stop the blood flow," Bandari said angrily. Micah heard the panic in her voice-they were not knowledgable enough to be doing this surgery. "If we can just stop the bleeding until vascular gets here. Dr. Owens how far out is Dr. Hewitt?"

"How far are you?" Micah heard Emily ask. She sighed, "Half an hour."

"We don't have half an hour," AJ pointed out.

"I know," Gina said, eyes darted left and right as she considered their options.

"What if we try to anastamose the two sections…" AJ began.

"There's nothing to anastamose," she replied. "Muscle's completely destroyed. Tissue's at least 80% necrotic."

Micah's heart fell, "We're talking serious compartment syndrome."

The three doctor's looked nervously at each other, all out of their depth and coming to the realization that they were about to change this girl's life forever. It frightened each of them that all it took was a bus crash to alter the course of a person's life. They nodded silently at one another.

"We don't have a choice," Bandari agreed to their silent understanding. She called to the nurse, "Get me the bone saw."

Micah had already steeled himself to what they were about to do when he heard Emily's desperate voice from the other side of the room, where she still held the phone. "What if the brachial artery-"

"Dr. Owens," Bandari cut her off, "if I could save the arm I would save it."

Micah saw the horror on Emily's face and was tempted to abandon his work to go comfort her. Emily was clearly attached to this patient, this young woman who was about to lose an arm. He knew she should try to avoid such connections, but he couldn't imagine an Emily without a big heart. Without her compassion, it would no longer be her.

Micah decided that the best way to honor Emily's patient and friend was to give her all of his attention and do his best work. He turned from Emily and lost himself in the task.

It was only when the amputation was finished that he looked up again. Emily was no where to be found. He felt uneasy. She wouldn't have left unless she had been very upset, and Micah needed to make sure she would be okay.

Rushing to the locker room, Micah grabbed his coat and began asking everyone he ran into if they had seen Emily. A few pointed towards to entrance, and Micah headed towards the doors.

Sure enough, Emily stood on the pavement, riffling through her notebook.

"Are you okay? You took off," Micah said, approaching to stand behind her. When she continued searching her pages, Micah added, "Emily?"

"I have to see if I'm…" Emily began, her riffling becoming more manic.

"See what? What are you looking for?" Micah asked. She was silent again and Micah moved to stand in front of her. He pleaded, "Emily..."

"I have to see what I wrote," she looked up at him, eyes desperate. "If I…when she came in, if I missed something."

Micah's heart bled for her. "You didn't," he said simply. "The tissue was dead. When she got to the hospital it was already dead. It doesn't matter what you wrote. It doesn't matter how organized you were."

Emily let the notebook drop. "She wanted to be a surgeon," she said, breaking down. "I'm not crying. Just pretend that I'm not crying."

Micah couldn't stand it, he reached over and and pulled her into a firm hug. "It's okay that you're crying," he told her.

She hugged him back, distraught. Then she pulled away, shaking her head and smiling sadly at him.

"What?" Micah asked.

"I don't know what I would do if you weren't here," she told him.

Micah couldn't believe what she was saying. It struck him with embarrassment and fear that this might be the moment... He felt awkward. "I think..." he said with a nervous chuckle, "I think you'd be okay."

"It's crazy, right?' Emily continued. "I mean, I've known you for like, five months? It feels like a lot longer."

Micah felt the words well up inside him. He had told himself to wait...to give her time. He had told himself that when he finally did say something it would be in a romantic way. Comforting her after an amputation was not romantic.

All the same, Micah felt a strong urge to draw her near again-to kiss her. This urge made him very nervous, since he knew he could not control it. Just when he felt his resolve falter, a car pulled up, horn honking.

"Looks like the roads are clear," he observed, happy to change the subject.

"Finally," Emily sighed.

A woman stepped from the car and called, "Somebody help us please!" Emily rushed to her aid.

Micah stared after her, taking deep breaths. He wanted so badly to just tell her...but he also wanted the timing to be just right. He didn't know what he would do if she turned him down. He couldn't bear to think about it. On the other hand, he didn't think his resolve to abstain from kissing her would hold out too much longer.

Sighing, he walked back into the hospital.

...

Cassandra wrapped her arms around Will's torso and brushed her hands familiarly upon his back.

"Hey, babe," she said, smiling.

Will looked pleasantly surprised by her behavior. "Hey, you," he said, placing his hands on her shoulders. "You seem happy."

"I'm thinking of getting a dog," Cassandra said, cocking her head.

"Oh wow," Will nodded. "Well, I love dogs, so no argument here."

"You know, we both have a day off coming up," Cassandra said, smoothing out the wrinkles on his shirt. "Maybe we could go to a pet shop and look around. I know it's grossly stereotypical, but I was thinking about one of those cute little pups that fit in a handbag..."

"Oh, um," Will stammered, clearly visualizing himself carrying a pink purse with a chihuahua's head peeping out. "Well, I suppose that is one of your options."

Cassandra hit him playfully in the chest. "I'm kidding," she said. "I was thinking something I could take running with me."

"That sounds nice," Will said. "But speaking of dogs, Chet's vet called me a minute ago to say that the doggie ambulance is on the way. Tyra and Emily are finding a spare stretcher. Any interest in helping us sneak the dog out?"

"I wouldn't miss it."

...

"Wow," AJ Aquino said, "she told you that she felt like she's known you forever and you DON'T go for it? Dude, you are clueless."

"We'd just cut a girl's arm off," Micah said defensively. "It's not as though that sets an ideal mood."

"Dude, we're doctors," AJ argued, "we're always going to be 'just done' with something gross."

Micah noticed two familiar forms approaching and turned to see Emily and Will walking towards him. They swung around to get out of the hallway and spoke haltingly.

"Hey," Emily stammered. "Are you guys, uh, gonna go the bar later? Cause we're gonna go to the bar."

"Yeah, oh yeah" Micah answered. If Emily was going somewhere of course he would go too. Emily's slightly guilty tone made him nervous, though. "Why?"

"Why?" Will repeated, as distracted and awkward as Emily. "Oh, uh…well," Will stammered, "Dr. Owens has agreed to buy every single one of us a round, so we're just getting an accurate head count."

Emily looked surprised by this declaration and Micah frowned at the weirdness passing between the two. "That's, of course, after all of the rounds that Dr. Collins is gonna buy," Emily forced a laugh, her eyes focused on something behind him.

Micah suddenly realized that they were trying to distract him. He turned to see bed with a small lump under the covers going past, pushed by Tyra and Cassandra.

"Where are you going with that patient?" Micah called to them, suspicious of their odd behavior.

Tyra returned his gaze with the same guilt in Emily's face. She chose her words carefully: "He's being transferred…to a more specialized hospital."

Micah furrowed his brow and turned to the bed. What on earth? He reached for the blanket and pulled the front part of it back. The fluffy golden tail of a dog wagged. He heard a whimper and put the blanket back down.

Micah looked back at Emily, who he knew, without asking, had started this. She gave him a guilty smile and Micah's heart raced. How adorable could one woman be?

"Good work today, everyone," he said, nodding to Tyra to continue on their way. He returned to Emily's side, his eyes locked onto hers. He felt electricity run through him. That he couldn't just reach out and touch her made him feel trapped in his own skin.

He watched as she and Will walked down the hallway, pushing and kidding each other. He felt the all-to-familiar jealousy he always felt when watching her with her old college friend, but something new had latched on also. It was hope. So what if she and Will had a history. Five month together and Emily already felt like she had known Micah forever. Imagine five months more. Will would be forgotten.

But then, Will might change his mind. Would she still be over him if he was no longer with Dr. Kopelson? Was this moment, when he was out of the way, Micah's best chance?

"Screw it," Micah said. "I'm doing it tonight. Nothing like a bus crash to make you realize how quickly things could change. I've got to take my window."

"Dude, but how's that going to work?" AJ asked. "I mean, you're going to want to be romantic, and there's no rolly chairs at the bar. I guess you can always get her, like, a bar stool."

Micah laughed, excited and afraid. "You're an idiot. You didn't see the poster, the poster was cool."

...

Cassandra barely registered that Micah and AJ had come into the bar, she was too busy discussing the breed of dog she most wanted to get.

"I always liked the mutts," Emily said. "I don't really care what they look, I just like a good personality."

"I had a German Shepherd when I was a kid," Will said as Emily turned to talk to Micah. "Now there's a dog. Loyal. Strong."

"Oh please," Tyra said with a roll of her eyes. "You're such a guy. Listen, get a golden retriever. You're going to want that level of cuteness."

"Oh, come on," Will teased her, "retrievers are so cliche'."

"I'm sorry," Cassandra roared, "is the man who can't shop for more that ten minutes at a time trying to decide what is fashionable?"

"What?" Will gave her a sideways grin and bumped his shoulder into hers. "I'm just saying..."

Emily pushed her phone into the space between them. A picture of Chet was on the screen. "Guys, look what the vet sent."

"Oh!" The three said together. "He looks so good! Look at that pink tongue!"

"It may be retriever..." Cassandra said, taking the phone.

"Yeah, he's cute," Will admitted reluctantly. "Scroll through, there's a few in there."

Cassandra swiped at the screen-Chet smiling, his tongue lolling, Chet laying on the vet's table, his belly being scratched, Chet licking the vet's face...

Cassandra's breath caught as she scrolled to the next image. It wasn't of Chet...it was Will asleep on Emily's couch. Cassandra noticed that there was a time stamp in the corner and had a suspicion that she remembered that date quite well.

"So cute," she muttered, hitting the share button and entering in her information. "I'm going to send this one to myself."

Cassandra dismissed herself and went to the women's room. She took out her phone and opened her calendar. Scrolling back to the date on the photo, she read through her notes on that day.

Her hands stopped working as she read the calendar. The phone dropped to the floor. She cursed and knelt to pick it up, turning it slowly in the hopes that she had imagined what she saw.

But the screen showed what she had expected. It was the night that she been called in for a last minute assist. Her heart sank, but her thinking was suddenly clear. She wasn't crazy-he had been lying to her. Here was proof. Cassandra knew men, and she knew why they would lie. And it wasn't because he was such a good "friend."

This had to stop, one way or the other.

...

Tyra took over Micah's emptied seat. Emily had sensed him move away while she showed the vet's pictures to her fellow interns. She kicked herself a little for ignoring him. He had, after all, wanted to ask her a question.

She would make it up to him later. In the meantime she listened to Tyra talk about how she was going to move out of her parents' house.

Emily nodded her approval, happy to see her friend taking steps to grow up.

"So I can crash with you till I find a place?" Tyra said in conclusion.

-Wait, what?-Emily felt the alarms in her head go off.

"What?" She asked, struggling not to choke on her drink.

"You have a one bedroom, right?" Tyra asked.

Emily didn't like where this was leading, "Mm-hmm."

"So," Tyra explained, "we can trade off sleeping on the couch."

Emily shot her a look that could only be read as terror. How had this happened? This morning she had done one of her favorite things: shopping for organizational supplies. She had done so with the intention of organizing her life, because if it was organized enough, there would be no surprises.

That logic only worked in her head, however, because since the moment she had stepped out of her car, the day had already started falling apart. First her bag broke and her tools of organization were scattered everywhere, then a bus crashed while they were snowed in, then, before she knew it, there were holes being drilled into skulls and arms being amputated.

And now Tyra. Tyra was asking to move in with her. "Asking," in this case meaning "insisting." Emily knew she was powerless to say no. She also knew how much she valued her personal space...

"I'm so kidding!" Tyra laughed, making Emily feel momentarily better. Then she added, "I'll take the couch. See how easy I am to live with?"

...

Will scanned the room for Cassandra, but she found him first.

"Are you okay?" Will asked, concerned.

He couldn't read the look she was giving him, but the words she uttered were ominous enough: "I need to talk to you."

"Hey, is this about Emily asking me to help her create a distraction?" Will asked, preparing a pre-emptive denial. "Because we agreed that it would be more believable that way."

Cassandra rolled her eyes and tugged him towards the fireplace.

Will was becoming nervous, "Hey, what's going on?"

"You know…I was shaken," Cassandra said when they had found a place clear of others. "I mean, I was…I was really shaken when I didn't get the research assistant position. I've always taken second place finishes really badly..."

So it was this again? Will tried to sound encouraging: "Because you push yourself to hard..."

"Wait," Cassandra cut him off. "What I'm saying is…I've been in this position before. I've come in second before. Hell, I've come in second to Emily before. But I've never lost this…confidence in myself and in my judgement. Until today. Today I held a drill in my hand and I thought, 'Emily can do it better.' And that's not me. I don't see myself as second best."

"Good," Will said, trying to pick up on positives of what she said. "That's good, you shouldn't."

"But that's how you've made me feel!" Cassandra blurted. She shook her head. "This thing with Emily..."

Will felt himself become tense. He didn't know how many more times he could deny what seemed so obvious to him. "There's no thing with Emily," he said irritably.

Cassandra didn't speak, instead she pulled out her phone and showed him a picture of himself sleeping on Emily's couch.

"I looked at the date," Cassandra explained. Will's heart fell. "I remember this night. I called you and you didn't pick up and the next day you said you passed out at home."

Will knew this looked bad, but not for the reasons she thought. "I, uh," he stammered, "I went over to her place to help her with a bookshelf, okay? It was after a killer shift, I was tired. I passed out. Nothing happened."

"So why did you lie?" Cassandra asked. She believed him that nothing happened, but her anger only increased.

Will felt dizzy all of a sudden. He guided Cassandra to take a seat by the fireplace. He searched for the words that would adequately convey the truth, "You were…you were just so sensitive about Emily."

Cassandra nodded, as though something had been confirmed. "So you knew. Even before I told you today, you knew how I felt and you still went behind my back."

"I messed up, okay? I made a mistake," Will admitted, feeling more annoyance than contrition. It seemed these days like he couldn't even talk to his friends without calling down Cassandra's wrath. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that she demand so much of him. "I'm sorry, but his whole thing is-it's…it's out of control, it's..."

"You know what?" Cassandra cut in. "You're right, I agree. It's complete screwed up. And it's messing with my head, because you keep telling me nothing's happening, but I FEEL like something's happening."

"Well, nothing's happening!" Will shouted.

"Then choose."

Will's entire body tensed. She couldn't be serious...

"Choose what?" Will asked, horrified.

"Me or Emily," Cassandra said.

Will had no intention of answering such an unfair question. It wasn't that he was unable to choose between his girlfriend and his best friend, it was that there was absolutely no reason why he should have to. His brain worked on overdrive trying to find a response that conveyed his disdain of the very idea of such a choice, but the thought was so absurd that it defied all logic.

"Cassandra…" he murmured, wondering that she didn't realize how crazy she was acting, "wha…"

Cassandra nodded as though he had given her an answer, "We're done."

Will continued to sit, stunned, at the fireplace, trying to wrap his head around what had just happened.

...

Emily considered the piles of snow that had been plowed out of the streets earlier in the day. Snow was by nature a very organized thing. It fell evenly across the a yard or road, neat and orderly-a smooth and solid crust. But then other forces went to work-digging and piling, shoveling and melting, until there were areas of naked earth and piles of jagged cliffs.

Emily wondered if it was worth it to be organized. No amount of organization could have saved that girl's arm. No amount of organization could win Will away from Cassandra. No amount of organization could have prepared her for a new roommate...in fact, organization might become impossible with a new roommate.

Should she then embrace the messy and unknown? Was the universe trying to tell her to take this next step out of her comfort zone? Would she find herself better able to react to surprises if she didn't spend all of her time preparing for the expected?

"Whatcha doin' out here?" Micah's voice asked.

Emily laughed at herself, "Just having a small existential crisis."

"Oh," Micah said. "One of those. Why?"

"Chaos," Emily explained. "It's just all chaos. Can't organize it cause you're just constantly, constantly blindsided."

Emily gave the jagged piles of snow one last look, and then gave up her wondering. She supposed that, by definition, no one could prepare for the unknown. What she could do was live in the present.

She remembered suddenly Micah's request from earlier. Turning to him, she inquired: "What did you, um, want to ask me?"

"Um…" Micah breathed. He rocked back on his feet, seeming uncomfortable. Emily immediately started wondering what Micah could be uncomfortable about. Was it about his mom, maybe? Or did he have a personal question? She gave him what she hoped was an encouraging smile.

Micah said nothing, but he took a step closer. A large step...a step that put him well into Emily's personal space bubble. Emily felt her heart beat quicken and she realized that his eyes were focusing on her lips. Understanding washed over her. He wanted to kiss her. He liked her. Emily considered if she wanted him to...she watched his lips too as they drew closer, but then her eyes were closed and their mouths were pressed against each other.

Emily could barely wrap her head around what was happening. She grabbed at the lapel of his winter jacket just to make sure she wasn't imagining things. His hand came to rest above her hip.

-Micah?!-Emily's mind screamed in surprise-I'm kissing Micah?!-

Her body tingled where is touched his and she felt warm where they had come together. She didn't know what she felt for Micah-she thought of him as a boss and friend-but the kiss felt amazing, and maybe that was all she needed to know.

The kiss lingered, and then they parted. Emily gently let go of Micah's lapel and she opened her eye in time to she him swallow nervously. He searched her face for a reaction.

Emily knew she should say something, but a happy glow and the paralysis of utter shock had slowed her mind to a standstill. She had to say something.

-Say something. Anything!-

"Thank you," is what came out.

-Ugh, Emily! Anything but that!-

Emily opened her mouth to make another attempt, but Will's voice cut through her already confused thoughts. Micah stepped back.

"Hey, check this out," Will yelled. "So, Cassandra and I broke up, right?"

Micah's head swiveled to catch her reaction and Emily saw the fear in his eyes. The fear was understandable-despite Emily's insistence that a crush on Will was a thing of the past, the tiny sliver of hope hidden in her subconscious had struck a joyous chord.

"Yeah, she's in there," Will continued, "she's just totally irrational. I mean, it's…"

"Sorry," Emily offered awkwardly. Her eyes kept darting to Micah, who looked like he was about to be sick. Emily felt her brain melting under the pressure. She needed to talk to both of them, but obviously not at the same time. "Listen, um… "

"No, it's-it's…" Will stammered, "I mean, it's not your fault."

"Right. No," Emily agreed slowly. Will needed a friend after a break-up, so that should be her priority, right? But then again, Micah had just kissed her. "Um…"

As if trying to choose between Will's problems and Micah's revelation wasn't enough, Tyra burst through the door and out into the night. She stumbled up to the confused trio and reached between the two men in order to grab at Emily's arm.

"Hey, come on roomy! " Tyra said. "We gotta get up early."

Emily's eyes grew wide. She looked back at Micah, whose moth was open in a silent plea. Tyra tugged harder. "Oh that's starting…now?" Emily asked. "Tonight?"

Pulled between Will and Micah by Tyra's strong grip, Emily found herself walking away from them both.

"Bye!" Tyra called.

Emily glanced back as she was led to her car. She saw that both men were watching her walk away. Emily couldn't imagine what would go into organizing this mess.


	13. Chapter 13

Episode 13

Walking out from the bar, Emily handed Tyra her keys. She claimed to feel too tipsy to drive, but Tyra hadn't seen her drink much of anything. Shrugging, Tyra unlocked the driver's side and started the engine, driving towards what she was already thinking of as HER apartment.

Tyra rambled on about necessary changes to THEIR apartment as Emily looked distractedly out the window, her thin finger tapping restlessly on the door. Not one to be ignored, Tyra pushed the conversation forward. "So, I was thinking," she said, "there's that shelf in your bathroom, right? I could just clear your stuff off one that use it, right?"

Emily just gave a vague smile and nod, clearly lost in her own thoughts. Tyra considered what was causing the distraction, and then worried that it might be her moving in.

"Plus, I have this really cute shower curtain that we should use," Tyra plowed ahead. "You'll totally love it. It matches this painting I have of Diana Ross on a bear skin rug-totally retro-it'll go great in the living room. And...Okay seriously, you haven't said one awkward 'okay' since we left the bar? You're not...you're not going to say no are you?"

"Tyra..." Emily said slowly. Tyra clenched the wheel, terrified that she wouldn't have a place to sleep that night. Instead, Emily blurted: "Micah kissed me."

Tyra lost control of the car for a moment as her brain re-calculated. "What?!" She squealed as they both grabbed for the wheel.

On any other night, this would have upset Emily, but she gave no reaction. "He..I don't know, he wanted to ask me something," Emily explained, sounding panicked, "and when I asked what, he just, you know, stepped forward and kissed me."

Tyra felt herself laughing, "Oh my god, what do you do?"

"I...I don't know..." Emily continued, "I let him."

"Well, okay...Was it...good?" Tyra asked, already prepared to tease her friend about this new development. "I mean, did it make you want to, you know, take him home?"

Emily hid her face in her hands. "Tyra...what's happening?" She cried. "Where did that come from? I can't even..." Emily gesticulated wildly, "Like, one minute we were talking and the next he..." she paused, looking ashen. "Oh god."

"What?" Tyra asked, worried.

"Oh no, oh god," Emily breathed, grabbing he bag and rummaging through it, "I need to text him."

Tyra put a hand over the bag. "What is wrong with you?"

Emily allowed herself to be stopped. She looked over at Tyra, stricken, "I just remembered what I said to him."

Tyra knew Emily to be the type who always said exactly the wrong thing, so she simply sat back and prepared herself to be entertained. "What?"

Emily cringed, "I said 'thank you'." She then dove back behind her own hands.

"You...?" Tyra laughed, fully taking in this reaction. "Okay, you so cannot text him. That is a face-to-face conversation."

"Come on, it wasn't that bad," Emily said defensively. "I was surprised and...and flabbergasted and oh god, he's going to hate me now."

Tyra rolled her eyes. "He's not going to hate you," she said. "Now, what did you say after...after 'thank you'?"

"Nothing," Emily practically shouted. "I didn't say anything else, because then Will burst out and said..." she turned, if possible, even more pale. "Oh god, he said he'd broken up with Cassandra." Emily's hand shot up to cover her mouth, as though she'd just been caught swearing.

Tyra let her brain wrap around this new fact, suddenly sober. "Shit," she said. "That's...shit. So...what are you going to do?"

"Run away and live deep in the woods?" Emily suggested quickly.

"I would get my the apartment all to myself..." Tyra said thoughtfully. Emily frowned at her. "No, really, what are you going to do?"

"I don't know," she replied, rubbing her eyes. "I need to think about it. And I need to sleep. Sleep is good-I'll know what to do in the morning."

...

Emily did not know what to do in the morning, though she certainly had thought about it...and thought about it and thought about it. When she had finally passed out from exhaustion, she had at least simplified the situation to three seemingly simple tasks:

1) She needed to apologize to Micah-saying "thank you" could be misinterpreted and the last thing she wanted was to hurt his feelings. 2) She had to think carefully before getting involved with her boss-dated Micah wasn't like dating a fellow intern-her career could be affected. 3) She had to ignore the tiny spark of hope that had awoken since Will's breakup-he had turned her down while still single, so his being single again was irrelevant.

Emily let Tyra drag her to a coffee shop that morning, insisting that they both deserved a treat. Tyra hadn't uttered a word about the hospital or the people in it, and she even paid for them both. Emily was surprised by this thoughtful behavior, until Tyra leaned over her coffee and demanded, "Alright, dish. What are you going to do?"

Emily sighed. "Well..." she began. It was always a different experience to speak one's thoughts instead of keeping them inside. Now that she was about to voice her resolutions, she felt less sure of them. "I need to...I need to apologize to Micah."

Tyra nodded, considering this. "Okay," she offered, "pretend that I'm him. What are you going to say?"

"Um, okay..." Emily nodded, straightening in her chair. "Hi, Micah!" She said, laughing awkwardly. She toned it down, "Hi, sorry. Um, look, I just wanted to say that I was really surprised, last night. Because I, well I just wasn't expecting that. Um...I'm...I'm really sorry, Micah, for what I said. It was…it was dumb. Like I said, when you kissed me, I was….I was really, really surprised."

Emily finished her pathetic speech, which had been the best she could do, and looked at Tyra expectantly. Tyra answered with a patronizing "Thank you. For that explanation."

"You have to get over the fact that I said thank you. It's not that funny," Emily chided. She turned back to her dilemma, "I'm just so confused, Tyra."

"Are you confused because of Will?" Tyra asked.

Emily was taken off guard by this question. "No. I'm…what do you mean?"

"Just like that?" Tyra asked. "Four years of being in love with him and just overnight it's gone?"

"It's not gone," Emily said, though she had to admit, she found the prospect of continuing to pursue unrequited love more distasteful than ever. "It's just squashed very deep down. And I would rather focus on something very, very good that's right in front of me." It was true: the revelation of Micah's affection didn't change Will's feelings-it wasn't him against Micah, it was Micah against the prospect of mooning after her best friend, forever rejected.

"Good," Tyra said, as though the matter was settled. "Just go for it, then."

"No," Emily balked "I can't just go for it. He's my boss. There's all kinds of professional implications."

Tyra cocked her head, "So you're not going to go out with Micah?"

"I want to," Emily said, thinking about how happy she felt around him. "That's the thing."

...

Cassandra had been sitting around her apartment restlessly awake for hours before deciding to just go into work early. There was always extra work to do, after all, and her empty bed was causing her a great deal of anxiety.

Not that she would admit it to anyone. In Cassandra's long history of dating she had only ever been dumped once. Being dumped was the ultimate sense of powerlessness, and Cassandra didn't do powerless. After that first time, whenever she had seen a relationship on the rocks, she had ended it herself. Even if there had been a sliver of hope...or love.

She didn't want to think about it. Unfortunately, as she turned onto a fourth floor hallway, the subject of her avoided thoughts stood at the other end. Cassandra hesitated, attempted to turn around, and then sucked up her discomfort. The sooner Will realized just how over him she was, the sooner things would settle into a tolerable pattern. Holding her head high, she flounced down the hallway and past him.

Grabbing her arm, Will lead her into an empty room. On edge, she stared at him expectantly, unwilling to initiate an interaction. Will opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again, and sighed. He scratched his head and paced the room, then directed her to sit.

"So..." Will said as Cassandra smiled benignly at him, "how are you?"

"I'm fine," she beamed. "Thank you for asking."

"You're...you're fine?" Will asked. "That's it? You break up with me last night and you're...fine?"

"It's fine," Cassandra said with a tone of voice that suggested his concern was absurd. "I'm fine."

"So you don't want to talk about it?" He asked.

"About the breakup?" Cassandra asked. "What's to talk about? I'm fine, like I said." Cassandra saw Will's face break into a smile as well, which made her angry. What did he have to smile about? "What's funny?"

"Uh…you," he answered, "your reaction. I'm just…you know, I'm a little…little confused. We did date, right?"

He was confused, Cassandra recognized. She had forgotten how confusing her spontaneous breakups could be. "It's over," she explained. "You chose Emily."

"What are you talking about?" Will shouted. "I didn't choose Emily."

"Yes, you did," Cassandra insisted. "And it's okay. I'm fine. What can you do? Relationships end, right?"

Will didn't say anything more. He stared at her resentfully for a number of minutes, made a variety of frustrated faces, sighed again, and huffed out. Cassandra breathed out the moment he had gone. She didn't know how she had held her smile steady through the encounter, but she knew it had to get easier.

Holding a trembling hand up to her face, she knew at least that it couldn't get any worse.

...

Micah saw Emily coming and held the door open for her. She was looking down and replied with an unseeing thank you. Micah couldn't help but laugh, "Again with the thank you."

Micah had written and deleted many a text message before realizing that "thank you" was not the kind of response he should read too much into. That she hadn't messaged him was slightly disconcerting, but then, a kiss was perhaps something that shouldn't be talked about via technology.

"Micah!" Emily turned and gave him an excited smile, and Micah relaxed-all of his fears falling away. Her smile was radiant and embarrassed and shy, and there was no way she was impartial to him. She began to ramble, "Um, I'm so sorry about that. I was…I was just…I was surprised because I hadn't thought about you that way. I mean, I had thought about you like that, because you're cute, funny…but you're also my boss."

Though deeply appreciative of all these words, Micah was hyper-aware of the eyes that might be watching. "Hey, should we maybe have this conversation in private?"

Emily looked around, as though realizing where she is for the first time. She nodded, "Yeah."

With a hand to guide her, Micah led Emily towards her office.

"I thought about calling you," Emily said, "but that just felt so..."

"Yeah," Micah nodded, "it's a little so. But, you know, I was thinking..."

Micah opened the door of Emily's office to find Will sitting in her chair-the chair HE had gotten for her. He felt the strange desire to grind his teeth or growl.

"Hey," Will said with his usual confidence. Micah looked at Emily, trying to gauge her reaction. He had fretted all night about how she might react to her college crush's new availability. He knew that Will had rejected her, but that wouldn't necessarily stop her from trying to win his affections.

But, to Micah's relief, Emily's eyes were focused on him. He tried to show his desire to be alone with her, and she returned the look.

Will stood, "I was just going to talk to you about, uh…" he began. He must have noticed the look that had passed between them, because he asked, "are you guys, like, working or something?"

Micah bit back laughter. If only that meat-head knew! Did he know? Would Emily tell him?

"We were going to talk about something," Emily said vaguely.

"Okay, no problem," Will nodded, shooting him a suspicious look. "I'll just…"

Micah's excitement to get Will out of the picture was short-lived. His pager beeped. "Oh, Uh," he mumbled, looking down to see that it was a call from his mother, "I have to get this. We'll talk later."

"Okay," Emily said, showing him another shy smile. Micah felt his confidence soar.

...

Will felt an unease in the pit of his stomach as Micah gave Emily one last lingering look. There was something unspoken between them...a familiarity...one that made him feel uncomfortable. He tried to think that she had completely innocent intentions: "You buttering him up so he'll pick you to assist on his triple A repair?"

"Hmm?" Emily asked, looking confused.

"Well, Dr. Bandari's on vacation," Will explained, though his unvoiced question had already been answered. "So…Dr. Barnes is heading the procedure."

"Oh, no," Emily said quietly, "I didn't…I didn't know."

Will thought about it and realized that he had been naive. Their Resident had definitely shown preference to his friend...they seemed to be good friends themselves...yet, if he looked back, there was something more. He wondered if Emily had noticed. "Yeah. I mean, not that you need to butter him up," he said, trying to assess her reaction. "I…I think he actually likes you."

A shadow passed over Emily's eyes, but Will couldn't read it. It upset him that he couldn't tell, as he usually could, what she was thinking. She asked, in a halting voice, "What did you want to, um, talk to me about?"

Nothing. He had come into her office to be near a friendly presence-to at least continue to keep company with the person who, so Cassandra claimed, he had chosen. He clung to this thought as he rambled, "Yeah, um, oh, Just how Cassandra's being crazy…"

"He does!" Emily blurted. "Like me. Micah does."

Will swallowed heavily. He recalled Emily's other relationships and how he had talked freely with her about them...and wondered why he felt uneasy this time. "Uh," he began, trying to sound casual, "do you like him?"

"Yeah, I think I do," Emily said with a sweet smile. Will felt his insides twist, but he heard her say, "But he's my boss."

"Right," he said, clinging to this as the reason for his discomfort. "That's true."

Will swallowed again, his mouth dry. He didn't know what it was that he was feeling or what he wanted to say, but he felt sure that figuring this out was about to change things between them. Emily broke the contact first, excusing herself.

Was Cassandra right? Had he chosen her? He had thought her premise was wrong-namely that he hadn't chosen between one girl and the other, but had rather chosen NOT TO choose, since it had been a completely unreasonable request to begin with. But her words rang in his ears anyway-you chose Emily. He didn't think that he had, but now that another man was choosing her, he had to admit, he felt uneasy.

...

Micah pacing in in sleeping room. As he waited for Emily to arrive, he thought about what she had said in the hallway, before their conversation had been interrupted. He didn't remember all of it, nervous as he had been, but he remembered she had called him cute.

He turned on the same spot yet again, thinking about what he should say. He knew he shouldn't come on too strong, though all he truly wanted was to wrap her in his arms and kiss her. He thought, maybe, he should start instead where she left off.

The door opened and Emily came in. They smiled at one another like school shy children and she went to sit on one of the cots.

"So…" Micah said, stopping himself from sitting next to her. "So, you were surprised."

"Mm-hmm," she nodded. "Very."

Micah couldn't help himself-the strength of his feelings seemed too strong to hold. "How did you not know liked you?"

"Because you're my boss." Emily whined, as though this was obvious. "I didn't…I didn't go there."

"Ever?" Micah asked.

"When I did go there," Emily admitted, "I would try not to go there."

"Okay, good," Micah said with finality. "So, then, stop trying no to go there."

Emily nodded, looking unconvinced and turned her face away. She was bathed in sunlight and Micah could barely stop himself from leaning down to kiss her-to place his hand on her halo of golden hair and draw her near. Unable to help himself, he reached out to tuck her stray bangs behind her ear. She looked up.

"I do like you…" she said.

"Then let's go on a date," Micah said.

"…but you're also my boss," Emily continued, "which complicates things and it scares me, so I just…I want to think things through. Look before leaping and…all that."

Micah found this sad, but he nodded. What exactly did looking before leaping entail? It wasn't a no, so that was something. He imagined Emily talking through the pros and cons with her friends...with Will, even...and realized that he had to be a part of the process. "Okay, no problem," he said. "We'll hash it out over lunch." When she gave him a patronizing look, Micah insisted: "I'm not going to stand by while you convince yourself that we shouldn't give this a try. I'm involved now, so…you, we'll…we'll talk about it together."

"Sounds kind of like a date," Emily argued.

"Whoa, whoa, no!" Micah disagreed comically. "No, definitely not a date. I mean, that would…that would be confusing, seeing as how we haven't decided whether it's a good idea to go on a date."

"Right," Emily nodded, still not sounding certain.

Micah considered the places he knew to meet that would offer them privacy but was also innocuous enough to not be considered the place for a date. The lunch and break rooms were obviously out, as was the roof. Then it struck him: "Records room, 1:00PM, bring your own lunch," he instructed. Then, to lighten the air, he added, "Which I would NEVER say if this was a real date."

...

Will was somewhat disconcerted to find himself paired on a case with his now ex-girlfriend, but as he thought about it, he relished the opportunity to see how she was coping with the breakup. He didn't have any illusions that she should be devastated, but he was still uncertain what the problem had been. The night he slept over at Emily's had been completely innocent-the only unpleasant part of it being caused by Cassandra's own uncertainty. His annoyance grew...how many times could he tell a woman he was only interested in her before he lost interest?

They walked down the hall towards their patient's room in an uncomfortable silence. He almost wished she would yell at him...at least then he could deny her fears.

"So, um," he tried again, "are you still planning to go the the pound this weekend and pick a dog?"

Cassandra arched a brow, but didn't look at him. She replied, "Maybe this time I'll let a dog choose me."

Will rolled his eyes. He opened the door patient's door for her and she gave him a patronizing smile before entering.

He walked in, shaking his head to dislodge the annoyance. Luckily his own frustration was drowned out by the two women arguing. Will entertained himself with helping them settle their argument, but Cassandra butted in.

"So what brings you here?" She asked, serious.

The patient touched her companion's arm affectionately, "Oh, this one is a worrywart. I just have this cough. It's..."

"She was having heart palpitations," Julie, the worrywart, interrupted. "And she coughed so hard she collapsed."

Cassandra headed off this new round of banter, "Okay, well, you probably have a spot of pneumonia. We'll get a chest x-ray."

"Just get me out of here before all the kids descend this weekend," the patient begged.

"We're going to do our best," Will smiled. He turned to Cassandra and became serious once more. "You also need an EKG, okay?"

The patient nodded as he began to set things up. She grinned up at him. "You single?"

"Oh, Maggie!" Julie swatted at her.

"Like you weren't thinking it," Maggie replied. She looked back at Will. "We have a daughter. She's very smart, very pretty."

Without meaning to, Will shot a glance at Cassandra, who rolled her eyes and looked away.

"Oh no," Maggie said sheepishly, "did I step in it?"

"No, uh," Cassandra answered coolly, "as it turns out, he is single. Newly. From me."

"Nice going," Julie chided.

"Oh…sorry," Maggie said to Cassandra. "I had no idea."

"It's fine, for the best," she replied quickly. Cassandra said as she left the room, "You run the EKG and I'll order the X ray."

Will nodded and went ahead with his work, frustrated.

Maggie gave him a sympathetic look, "So why'd you dump her?"

"No, I didn't. She, uh…" Will muttered, trying to copy Cassandra's cool smile, "she actually dumped me."

Both women cried out in protest and Will heart warmed. He was glad that other people were able to understand a circumstance that mystified him. "I appreciate that, thank you. But, uh, you know, whatever. Relationships end, right?"

Maggie gave a significant look to her companion. "Until you find the one that doesn't," she said fondly. Looking back to Will, she continued. "Listen, this is all you need to know: look for the person that brings out the best in you-who makes you the best version of yourself."

"Well, see," Will replied, "that's good advice. Because who wouldn't want to be their best?"

A nurse came in and helped him administer the EKG, and Will considered the woman's words. He knew that Cassandra had continued being rude to people despite his attempts to get her to play nice. But that was all tolerable so long as it hadn't rubbed off on him. But had it? He considered the times he had left Emily hanging when Cassandra had been upset-had justified her behavior and therefore abetted it...And now, without a good reason, she was going to start treating him with the same rudeness.

"So, everything okay?" The Patient broke through his thoughts. He examine the EKG and saw that it looked normal.

"Mags, shh," Julie chided. "Let the man do his thing."

Will smiled. "The man has done his thing," he said. "Yes, your EKG looks great." With a prescription for anitbiotics and the instructions to come back if she didn't feel any better, he set her loose.

"No problem. Amy will bring me back," Maggie said with a wink, "Our daughter, the cute one."

"You know, for what it's worth, she really seemed cold," Julie offered. "That doctor that dumped you."

Will felt a moment of discomfort, realizing the nurse was still behind him. He didn't need his personal life broadcast around the hospital. She averted her eyes. He supposed it didn't matter. "She did, though, right?" He asked in earnest. "Which is weird because she was like that with everyone else, but with me it was different, you know."

"Really?" She asked.

"Well, whatever," Will shrugged. "I guess I was wrong." He gave them a smile that wasn't quite convincing.

...

Emily hovered outside of Joyce's hospital room, unsure if she should go in. She was spotted, however, and Micah's Mom called her in with, "Hey honey."

"Hey," Emily said gently. "I just wanted to check in. How are you?"

"Oh, okay, you know," Joyce said, looking a little sad. "My daughter's coming today, so I'm soaking up all the peace and quiet I can get."

"Micah has a sister?" Emily asked, coming into the room. "He didn't tell me. What's she like?"

"Liz?" Joyce looked at the ceiling, considering. "A bit wild, I'm afraid. Though very sweet, just like her big brother."

Emily grinned. "Aw...I bet Micah makes a great big brother."

"Here," Joyce said, patting the bed on her left. "Let me show you something. Have you ever been to Disney World?"

Emily walked around the bed. "Oh, wow, awhile ago, yes."

"So you know the flying elephants..." Joyce said, turning on her iPad and scrolling through the files. She tapped on an icon and handed it over to Emily. "Here, look at this."

Emily looked at the picture of dark-haired child wearing a Mickey Mouse shirt. He was flexing his muscles as the elephants soared behind him. He looked happy and free, and fit with what she knew of him-everything she liked about him.

"Aw!" Emily giggled, smiling down at Joyce. "That might be the cutest thing I've ever seen."

Joyce grabbed her arm and held it warmly. "He loved that shirt. Wouldn't take it off. Now, he doesn't want anyone knowing this, but ever since I've called him my Micah Mouse."

Emily almost choked on her laughter. Yep, cutest thing ever.

"Oh, and here's where he met Mickey..." Joyce said, looking truly happy.

"What are you looking at?" Came Micah's voice from the doorway.

Emily felt herself blush. "Just some old pictures of you…Micah Mouse."

Emily knew that she was the only one who could get away with calling him that. He merely grinned at her. "Did you hear my sister's coming?"

"I did," Emily nodded, "I'm excited to meet her."

"Eh, approach with caution," Micah advised. "Like a wild animal."

"Micah, that's enough," Joyce corrected him.

"Listen, I have some pretty big news,' Micah said, changing the subject. He took the manila folder he was holding and turned it around. "You got into the clinical trial, Mom. The one at Mayo. Now they've had results. Like, real results. Starts in two weeks."

Emily felt herself get excited. Mayo was the best. She shared a happy smile with Micah. Joyce, however, looked like someone had just killed her puppy.

"Who, hey, this is good news," Micah said. "This is what we've been hoping for."

"I know we were," Joyce said, frowning deeply.

Emily knew it was best for her to leave. As with any patient, she knew that the choice of whether not a terminal cancer patient should continue seeking treatment after non-responsive chemo was a very personal issue. She was close to Joyce-and close to Micah-but she had no illusions that she deserved a place in that discussion.

Even if she had, the solutions was nothing but foggy.

Micah moved to sit on the edge of the bed as Emily walked out into the hallway. "Talk to me."

"I've got to be realistic..." Joyce began. Then Emily was out of earshot. She looked at them both from a distance, connected but separate. She wished that she had the chance to meet Joyce under different circumstances.

Micah listened to his mother, then looked at her in fear. Emily's heart fell.

The time had come when Joyce was planning for her death and now her son knew it. Emily's eyes welled with tears. She walked away, wiping at them.

...

[What are you wearing?] Tyra typed and hit send. She looked up while waiting for a response and saw Cassandra become suddenly alert. Looking over, she saw that Will had just entered the break room. This drama was just getting more and more interesting, wasn't it.

[Sexy gym clothes, :p, but I'm going for a shower once I'm done on the treadmill]

[Ooh, hope you're thinking of me] Tyra typed. She looked back up in time to see Cassandra weave her way out the door. Will threw his hands up in frustration. Tyra felt herself smirking.

"Hey, you looking for an apartment?" Emily's voice asked.

"Nah, I'm just IM'ing with an old booty call," Tyra replied, not taking the bait. Seeing Will's attention snap to Emily as soon as she had walked in, Tyra said loudly, "Hey, do you mind clearing out of your place tonight? Roomie? Just sleep at Micah's..."

It worked like a charm. Will stepped forward far too quickly to pretend indifference and asked: "You're sleeping at Micah's?"

"No. I'm..." Emily stammered. She shot a panicked look at Tyra, her face red. "No."

"So you decided not to date him?" Tyra pushed, wishing she had a box of popcorn.

"No, we haven't decided anything," Emily told them both. "We're having lunch today to hash everything out."

"Well, that sounds romantic," Will said with rakish smile. Tyra watched raptly. Will was jealous. He was completely out-of-his-mind jealous.

"It's not romantic, that's the point," Emily explained. "We're deciding whether of not to be romantic."

Will looked at her, his brow raised and skepticism all over his face. Tyra could almost see him thinking about what he would have done instead.

"Trust me, the kiss," Emily added, with just the right amount of self-congratulations, "was very romantic."

Clearly, this was the first Will had heard of this. Ugh, why hadn't she made popcorn?! Tyra saw Will go through shock, denial, and panic. In a harsh voice, he hissed, "You know, you might want to be careful of the whole boss thing at work. It get s a little complicated."

"Yeah, I'm aware," Emily said, remaining calm. "It's why we're having lunch."

They were then surrounded by a palpable silence, so charged that Tyra could hardly keep from grinning. She was sure for a second that Will was about to rush forwards, then sure that Emily was going to storm out. Tyra tingled as the moment drew on.

Then their pagers beeped, and the moment was broken.

Turning back to her computer, Tyra typed [I think we'll need to meet up at your place, I have a feeling my roomie is going to have some company tonight]

...

Liz gave a condescending wave to the girl running to catch the elevator and let the door close. She was a firm believer in sharing her own pain with as many people as possible, and today there was a lot of pain. She tapped her foot impatiently as the elevator climbed, and when it reached the floor she'd been sent to, she charged through the door.

Seeing her brother, she shouted his name and charged forward, meeting him with a rough shove.

"What the hell, Micah?" Liz shouted. "How could you not tell me about Mom?" She continued shouting and shoved him again.

"No, okay, come on over here," Micah spoke in a low forceful voice and guided her away from his coworkers. "You need to calm down."

This is not what Liz wanted to hear. "No, don't you dare tell me to calm down! I just saw her, okay? She has…she has no hair, and she's lost all of this weight."

"She asked me not to tell you. It was her thing, so I…I just…" Micah said lamely. "She just felt like you were doing so much better."

Liz's mind flashed red. "You know, I don't even know what that means. It is so condescending!"

"...just that you got a job and you were thinking of going back to school," Micah explained.

"Shut up, Micah. Just shut up!" She shouted. She didn't need another lecture about her life choices. Liz pushed her anger at him aside and tried to focus on her mother's cancer. "So…so-so-so what? So she's…so she's just going to die or something?"

"She could," Micah admitted. "But look, I got her into this new trial and…it's a long shot, but it's still a shot at least."

This was barely able to sink in. Without this trial her Mom didn't stand a chance. She tried to process this, "Okay, so when does that start?"

Micah gave her a serious look. "She doesn't want to do it."

"What?!" Liz cried. "No, she has to do it. Micah, you have to tell her she has to do it."

"Has that ever worked with you?"

Of course not. If Liz was considered obstinate, one didn't have to look too far to see the source. "What are we going to do?"

"We're going to try to convince her together," Micah said. Liz nodded, feeling the terror flood through her.

"I'm really mad at you, Mouse," she said, feeling her anger ebb away.

"I know. Oh, come here," Micah said, pulling her into a hug. "Don't call be that at work, okay?"

Liz rolled her eyes.

...

Cassandra rolled her patient-the one who was trying to set up her ex-boyfriend-out to the parking lot. She was probably just imagining the strange looks Maggie kept giving her, but all the same, she kept her eyes averted. She had known that the first day would be difficult.

"Jules drives like an old lady," Maggie said from her chair, trying to lighten the mood. "I could've gotten to the car faster in this chair."

Cassandra smiled, then noticed Will talking to a blonde in line for coffee. He looked up and saw her, then turned away.

She felt Maggie tap her arm. "Why'd you dump him?" she asked.

Cassandra looked at him-tall, fit, endlessly sweet... "I think he's in love with someone else," she allowed herself to say. Just like that, the gravity of the situation hit her. Saying the words out loud is too much. Cassandra drew in a sharp breath and held a hand to mask the pain that came over her face. "Sorry, uh…" she said to Maggie, fanning herself. "My god, I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. That's okay," Maggie answered with a generous smile. "You know, Jules and I broke up once and I had to go on antidepressants, and then I realized I just had to suck up my pride and apologize and get her back. You know, that's just what worked for us."

Cassandra nodded, though the prospect of winning Will back didn't seem relevant. Emily would still be there. Wiping her eyes and sniffling, Cassandra turned back with the now-empty wheel chair only to see the cause of her upset standing behind her.

"You okay?" Emily asked, looking concerned.

Cassandra rolled her eyes. This was the last thing she needed. "I'm fine," she said, pushing the chair past Emily without a second glance. Rushing to put the chair away before she lost control, Cassandra then ran to the nearest bathroom, chose an empty stall, and let her tears flow freely for the first time.

...

Will shuffled his feet when he caught Cassandra looking at him from across the parking lot. At least she hadn't smiled at him like a cypher as she had been all day-acting annoyed that he was upset by their breakup. He had every right to be upset-and every right to expect her to be upset.

He looked over again, but this time he saw Emily there. He felt relief and a strange twisting feeling, and waved her over.

Trying to take control of the situation, he ordered for them, "Uh, black, one sugar, and an extra sweet skinny vanilla latte, please"

"Oh, no vanilla," Emily said to the barista. She looked back at Will., "Over the sweet thing."

There was an awkward silence in which Will tried to figure out why this threw him off guard. Then he realized it was probably because the last time he had seen her he had acted like a complete ass. Clearing his throat, he said, "Um, look, I'm sorry I was weird earlier, okay? About you and Micah. You can date whoever you want. Just, obviously, I'm dealing with this whole work relationship breakup thing. So, you know, that's where I was coming from."

"Micah and I are different, though," Emily said. "We got to know each other first."

"Ouch," Will said in reply.

"Just saying," Emily defended.

Well, he supposed that was fair. Hadn't Emily tried to warn him about her old nemesis? Hadn't he ignored the fact that sweet-natured Emily would call ANYONE her nemesis? "Yeah, it's true, you know it's…very true," he said thoughtfully. "Also, you were…you were right about Cassandra. She's not even phased by this whole breakup thing at all."

"She's proud, you know that," Emily said with a shake of her head.

Will felt a little lightheaded. "Wow. First you're over vanilla lattes, and now you're trying to convince me that Cassandra's not that bad, huh?" It had been such a strange day. He had flipped and flopped on everything he thought he knew. His mind felt cloudy and confused, as though in the middle of being completely rearranged. He felt like a jigsaw puzzle that had been put together incorrectly and then broken, except now he was on the way to being put together correctly. Every now and then a piece would fall into place and the picture is was creating became a little clearer. But it wasn't clear yet, but he had a strange sense that he knew what it might be...

Paying for their coffees, Will and Emily walked back towards the door to the hospital. He tried to organize a thought he was having difficulty understanding. "And I also..." he attempted, "I just think maybe the reason I reacted the way I…just the idea of you dating somebody for real is…is kind of weird."

"I get it," Emily said noncommittally. "You're used to having me around, and that would change."

Is that what would happen if she started seeing Micah? Is that why he found the thought so unsettling. He considered it aloud, "What if I don't want things to change?"

"They have to," Emily said.

"Why?" Will asked. "I dated Cassandra, nothing changed."

"You broke up!" Emily shouted.

Okay, yes. And as Cassandra's insistence about his "thing with Emily" demonstrated, the cause was indeed his desire that nothing change. What could he say? He wanted his best friend.

He wondered fleetingly if Cassandra was right-if he HAD chosen Emily, but a panicked honking broke into his thoughts.

"Somebody help!" Julie yelled, an unconscious Maggie in the passenger seat.

...

The smell of nail polish hit Micah's nose before he even entered his mother's room. Liz was doing his Mom's nails and chatting away in her usual state of anger.

"It's totally creepy," she was saying. "It shouldn't even be legal. Stuff that's like, banned in Europe."

Micah couldn't help but announce his presence with the question, "What's banned in Europe?"

"Oh, the chemicals that we put in hair dye," Liz explained coolly. "It was practically poisoning me, breathing it in every day. That's why I had to leave the salon."

Micah met his Mom's eyes and they shared a concerned look. So his sister had left her steady job. He supposed it had been too much to hope that she might get her life together someday.

"What? What?" Liz shouted. "I saw that. What was that? I hate when you guys give looks about me."

"Liz!" Shouted Micah, feeling guilty. "Just calm down."

"No, stop telling me to calm down," Liz shouted back. "You know what? Fine. Fine. I will go back to the salon and I will get cancer. Are you happy?"

Micah could hardly believe that Liz had used the C word in front of his Mom. He gave her a look that spoke of his anger. Joyce looked suddenly serious and avoided eye contact.

"I'm sorry," Liz said, horrified, "I didn't…"

"It's okay," Joyce said, though it clearly wasn't.

Micah thought this was as good a time as any to bring up the trial. "Okay, look. We're all a little emotional right now. You, me, Liz. We know how tired you are."

"I'm not tired," Joyce argued. "Raiding you kids alone, I was tired. This is not tired. I want to leave the hospital. I want to spend time with my children."

Micah felt the blood leave his body. It was one thing for her to have a weak moment with him-he had been there with her these last months-but to tell Liz that she was giving up...

"Mom, stop!" Liz said. "Oh my god, this is so screwed up. This is so screwed up that I have to tell you like this, this way. This is so screwed up."

Micah thought he heard the classic Liz Barnes Oversell being set up, but he tried to give her the benefit of the doubt.

"What?" Joyce asked, taking the bait.

"No, this is so screwed up!" Liz yelled. She looked helplessly at their mother and then at Micah, who braced himself. "I'm pregnant."

"What?!"

"That is why I left the stupid salon," Liz added quickly. "Not because I can't keep a job, like you guys think. Don't judge me. Stop!"

Micah looked at his Mom to share another of their looks, but she wasn't looking at him. Her attention was eagerly on her daughter, a sparkle in her eyes.

"We're not, but…Is it Oliver's?" Joyce asked, arms outstretched. "Does he know?"

"Yeah, and he doesn't care, okay?" Liz said. "He told me to get rid of it, and I was going to, but when I got there, I just…I couldn't do it."

Micah thought he saw his mother smiling. Her arms practically trembled in excitement.

Micah sighed. "How far along are you?"

"Um, I think like, 11 weeks?" Liz said. "I…I mean, I haven't seen a doctor."

"Okay, look, I'll make you an appointment."

She nodded, and Joyce said quickly, "There's this really great store on 5th Street that sells baby clothes. It's all handmade by a local woman. I've always wanted to shop there. Oh, lets go this weekend."

...

"Well, It kinda depends on how you think a dog will fit into your lifestyle," said the representative Cassandra had been put in touch with. She had been inquiring as to the usual procedure for pet adoption.

"You know, I run a lot, so it's important that they're not low energy," Cassandra considered, "but I'm a doctor and there can be long hours, so they can't have really high energy either. Mostly, I um, I just want some company..."

"Why don't you come in tonight?" He suggested. "We're open until seven. I have a few animals coming to mind already, you can come meet them, see if you form a bond."

Cassandra nodded, turning the corner into the emergency room. "Sounds great. I'll be there."

Slipping her phone into her pocket, she looked up to see the patient that she and Will had seen-Maggie-being covered with a sheet. She felt like someone had pulled the rug out from under her. She quickly dashed back around the corner and hid as the stretched moved past.

Maggie had been so warm and encouraging only a few moments ago. Enough so that Cassandra had admitted what she had been unwilling to tell anyone. It didn't seem fair that the only person she had opened up to was now dead. Or perhaps it was only too fair.

Cassandra took a breath. This kind of reaction, though it made sense the day after breakup, was completely unprofessional. Then she was reminded of a throw-away comment that Maggie had made. She rushed off to check the charts.

...

Micah arrived early in the records room and, choosing an empty aisle, collapsed on the floor. Being around his sister always left him feeling drained-like he'd had the wind knocked out of him.

"You okay?" Asked Emily's voice.

"Yeah," Micah answered without looking. "Just letting the stress of my sister, my pregnant sister, drain from my body." He sighed and started to sit up.

"No, no, no," Emily argued. "Lying down looks nice." She dropped her lunch on a file box and laid alongside him. "I have the saddest case," she said. Then it hit her: "Your sister is pregnant?"

"Apparently," he replied. "Hey, thank god this isn't a first date. Family drama's not great first date material."

"Everybody's got it," Emily said.

Micah recalled their other conversation. "You don't talk about yours."

"True," she said. He looked over at her when she didn't say anything else, though he supposed he couldn't expect anything. Then she said, "Okay. My mom is...complicated. Sometimes she's a train wreck, sometimes she's a whirlwind. She's been through a lot of phases and a lot of men."

"What about your dad?"

"I've only met him once. My mom was...the other woman," Emily explained. She turned to him with a raised eyebrow. "Pretty sordid, huh?" She sighed, "My mom is the queen of mistakes. She just…she drives headlong into everything."

"Doesn't look before she leaps..." Micah observed, recalling her words from earlier.

"Nope," Emily smiled. "And it always ends terribly. Which is why I am the opposite. I think things through. I move at a glacial pace, and then, when I actually do fall for someone, I latch onto them like a barnacle that you can't pry off."

Barnacle? Micah hoped she didn't think of herself as a barnacle...though her connection to Will was pretty intense..."You trying to scare me?"

She looked over, discovered at her own game. "Is it working?"

Emily clinging to him? "No," he said simply. "Thanks for telling me about your mom."

"I like talking to you," she said.

"Not…just talking, I hope," Micah said, looking at her with hope.

She shook her head: "Not just talking."

It wasn't a yes. Micah turned onto his side, "Alright, we got to...let's figure this out."

Emily giggle and turned to face him. "Okay," she agreed.

"Worst case scenario: We date," Micah began, "and then one of us-probably you-is just a huge douche bag. And then…then we have to work together after that and it blows."

"Because you don't pick me for procedures because you're angry," Emily explains.

"No, no! I would never do that," Micah said, shocked to learn that this was her reasoning. "Doesn't even matter how big of a douche bag you were."

"Okay," she nodded, not fully convinced, "or…it's great, but then every time you choose me for something, people think I'm getting special treatment."

"Well, who cares what other people think?" Micah said lamely. He knew both issues were still open. "Look, it's true, a lot could go wrong, but…I also think a lot could go pretty right. Don't you?"

Shyly, Emily nodded. "Yeah, I do."

"So, let's take a leap," Micah said. "I want to take you out on a real date."

Emily looked around, "How could you follow up the records room?"

Micah smiled, already planning. "Just leave that to me. You in?

Biting her lip and closing her eyes, Emily took the leap and nodded her assent.

...

Will was coming back from lunch when Cassandra pulled him into an empty room.

"What is it?" He asked.

"Just come here," she commanded.

"I got to tell you, I'm confused," Will said rudely. "So now, all of a sudden, you want to talk?"

"It's about Maggie. The reason she died," Cassandra clarified. Will was suddenly unsure he wanted to hear this. She continued: "I was going back over everything in my mind to see if we missed something, and I realized she told me she was on antidepressants once, which wasn't in her chart."

No, it wasn't on her chart. If it had been, he would have looked for different things. "Antidepressants, you mean long QT?" Will asked, and Cassandra nodded. "Did you check the EKG?"

"I didn't want to do it out there," she told him.

Will took the file from her, not sure he could believe the implication. He measured the results again, and then felt his world drop from under him. "Oh god," he breathed. "The meds I prescribed..."

"It's so hard to catch," Cassandra said defensively. "Even cardiologists miss it."

"I gave her a fatal arrhythmia," Will allowed himself to admit. Then he let the words sink in. He had killed her.

"It was a mistake," Cassandra insisted.

"Yeah, yeah, you know, I mean, that's what I'll tell her wife, right?" Will shot back, feeling the guilt course through him at the thought of her loving partner. "I'm sorry, I made a mistake."

"No…don't TELL anyone," Cassandra hissed. "Look, the antidepressant thing isn't in the chart. The EKG looks normal. No one will catch it."

Will blinked. Had she just told him to cover up the fact that he had made a fatal mistake? "What are you talking about?"

"It'll be on your record forever," Cassandra explained. "It'll follow you to every interview and every hospital for the rest of your career. And it won't bring her back."

Will nodded. The idea seemed horrifying, but he knew that Cassandra just had his back. She would help him cover up the lie-help him get away with it. He balked at this thought...it wasn't as though he had done it on purpose, so he shouldn't think of it like covering up a crime. It was a mistake. All doctors made them. And the mistakes, in turn, made them better doctors.

He told himself this, but it didn't stop him from seeing Maggie's teasing face.

...

Tyra greeted Emily as she joined the group of waiting interns.

"Has he chosen his, uh, assistant?" Emily asked.

"Yeah," Tyra said slyly, "he's about to do it now."

Micah walked up to them, and Tyra couldn't imagine people NOT noticing their shared smile. Who did those two think they were kidding.

"Okay, rumor has it one of you is assisting on the triple A repair," Micah said. He scanned the group, shot Emily a confused look, and announced, "Dr. Kopelson, I'll see you in the OR."

This announcement shocked Tyra. She hadn't pulled her own hat from the ring, but it had seemed more than likely that her friend the favorite would be chosen. Almost inevitable, really.

Tyra turned to see Cassandra's reaction, then turned back to Emily, who had clearly been expecting a different outcome. His choice did seem an odd one, considering Emily was his trusted helper in the operating room, but then, drama wasn't called drama because it always makes sense.

"You, ah, you talked to him, then?" Tyra asked as the walked away.

"Yes!" Emily cried softly. "And I...look, maybe he would have picked Cassandra anyway. Maybe it has nothing to do with...things..."

"Oh please," Tyra said, "this has 'things' written all over it."

"You think so?" Emily asked, collapsing into a seat in the break room. "This is what I was afraid of. And what he assured me wouldn't be a problem."

"Maybe you psyched him out about it," Tyra offered, "you know, during your romantic committee meeting."

"No," Emily considered. "No...it was very cool."

Tyra raised an eyebrow. When had she become so invested in a straight chick's love life? "Then maybe he can't handle it. I bet Will could be talked into a romantic committee meeting."

"What?" Emily cried, "I thought you liked Micah."

"I like the idea of getting you laid," Tyra reminded.

"I don't know why you're bringing up Will anyway," Emily said distractedly. "It's not like anything has changed."

"You should talk to him," Tyra blurted.

"Will? Why, he's probably looking up another of my high school bullies so he can date them," Emily said.

"Wow, nice one," Tyra grinned. "No, Micah. You should talk to him. Maybe he was going to choose Cassandra anyway."

"Yeah..." Emily nodded. "Yeah, it's probably that. You know, I'M probably the one being weird and EXPECTING him to choose me. I'm probably crazy."

"No doubt there," Tyra replied.

...

Micah was on the way to the OR when he spotted a familiar figure in the parking lot smoking. His mind flew into a panic and he rushed outside.

"What are you doing?!" He yelled to Liz, who turned with a disdainful look.

"Oh relax," she said, dropping the cigarette. "I'm not actually pregnant."

The momentum of his charge caused Micah to double back in fury. "Oh! I knew it. I knew it!"

"Yeah, well, so what?" Liz shrugged. "So I lied."

"What were you thinking?!"

"Um, I was thinking," Liz explained, "that I don't want our mother to die."

"Look, I want her to do the trial too…"

"Yeah, well, you heard her. She won't. Unless something changed, she won't. And this way, she has something to live for." Liz yelled back. " No, you know that it's true. And…and once she's in there and started, then…then I'll lose the baby or whatever, but it won't matter because she'll already be in that stupid trial."

Micah remembered his mother's excitement, but felt disgusted at the thought. "Liz, we can't."

"She's going to die, Micah!" Liz shouted. "If we don't do this, she's going to die."

Micah didn't saw anything. He knew it was true. For all that he said their was a chance-that there was hope-his mother was going to die.

"That doesn't mean we can just lie to her," he said weakly.

"Why not?" Liz asked, sounding fiercely reasonable. "If she dies, then she'll never know. But WHEN she lives, she'll thank us for telling her exactly what she needed to hear."

"No, if she dies she'll do it with the regret of never seeing her grandchild," Micah argued. "And if she lives, then she'll feel the same."

"She'll have other grandkids, Micah," Liz shot back. "She told me you're in love with one of your interns, so I'm sure it's only a matter of time."

"Firstly, that's none of your business," Micah said. "And secondly, it doesn't matter what you say, lying is still wrong."

"Fine, Micah, fine," she said. "Then tell me your brilliant plan. Oh wait, you don't have one."

"That's not fair..."

"No, you know what's not fair, Micah? Being doubted by the people you love. Like you and Mom giving each other looks while I'm standing right there. Like you not TELLING me that she had Cancer! That's not fair," Liz fought. "Look, you know all this doctor stuff, but I know how to do the people stuff. Okay? Maybe it's all I know how to do. So let me do it. I know I can do it."

"I know you can too," Micah said softly. He stood and stared at his sister who had, regardless of her methods, done exactly the thing his mother most needed. He took a small step to hug her.

Liz rolled her eyes. "Ugh, don't you have anywhere to be?"

...

Will looked at his patient's ex-wife as she swallowed the information that her ex-husband, who had grown distant after the death of their only son, had lost all memory of the last several years. He had woken up thinking that they were days from being married. Will understood the woman's struggle.

"But you saw him in there," she was saying to he and Emily. "He loves me again. And the minute I tell him, that'll go away. Again." Shaking her head, unable to hold back tears, she walked away.

In some ways Will envied his patient. He wished more than anything that he could go back to the beginning of the day and forget that he had ever met Maggie. He wouldn't want to be told either, that a person had died.

"It's a pretty awful thing to admit to," Will said, deciding that he couldn't do it.

"I know," Emily agreed, "but she'll feel worse if she doesn't tell him."

Will thought about what Cassandra had told him. She would know, and he would know. And Julie wouldn't. Julie would think that Maggie had died randomly, a sad twist of fate. Wasn't that better, somehow, that thinking someone else had made a mistake that had caused her death-had killed her?

He would hold onto his guilt, he decided. And every terrible day that followed, he would see her face.

...

Liz had said she would take care of their mother, and Micah couldn't believe how right she was when he walked in to see Joyce with a full head of hair.

"Hey, looks great," he said to his Mom and Liz combed and styled the thick wig.

"Yeah, it's cause it's real human hair. It's expensive," Liz said impressively. "Stole it from the salon."

Joyce pretended not to hear this. She held tightly to her daughter as she said to Micah, "So, I, uh, changed my mind…about the trial. Got to try to see the grandkid, right?"

Micah looked at Liz, who would forever more be his partner in crime. He considered telling the truth, then decided against it. "Yeah, I think that's a good decision."

Liz hugged her Mom in reply and went back to combing the wig, chatting up a storm.

Micah tried to listen and participate, but he couldn't help the guilt that crept into his mind. It didn't seem fair, to be given only bad choices.

...

Will didn't expect that his patient's ex-wife would return and tell her tale of their dead son, and when she did he found his own resolutions wavering. He imagined himself in a strangely similar situation, telling the hospital legal staff that his inattention had caused the death of a woman...No, how could he?

"I don't know if I'd be able to do that," Will said out loud. He wasn't sure if he said it to Emily, who was standing alongside him, or to himself.

"You would," Emily said without thinking. "I know you. Trust me." A nurse handed her reports, and she took off with a gentle, "See you."

"Yeah…" Will breathed, staring after her.

Emily didn't know what he had done. She didn't know how much trouble he would be in or how his future would forever reflect the actions of today...and yet, she was so sure of him. It was the right thing to do, to tell someone. He could feel that, just as he felt the inherent unfairness of such hard-to-see problems causing a death. But Emily would have told. Emily was good. Emily would not have put her ambitions above the truth. And that is what she thought he was. She thought-no she KNEW-that he was good. Whatever Cassandra may say about the hospital never figuring things out, HE would know. He would know that he had lied. And Emily would continue to idolize him, because that is what she did, and he would feel guilty for every second of it. Unworthy.

More so than when Cassandra had looked him in the eye and asked him to choose, Will felt the choice that stood before him. It was the choice between reckless ambition and caring responsibility. It was the choice between Cassandra and Emily.

Swallowing back his fear, Will turned and walked towards the administrative offices to turn himself in.

...

Emily noticed Micah in the locker room and went in to talk to him. She had decided to take Tyra's advice and talk to Micah about his choice before she let herself over-think it.

"Hey…I wanted to talk to you about something," she said, walking up to him.

"Yeah," Micah agreed, grabbing his coat and closing locker door. Emily almost jumped when she saw that a dark-haired woman was standing behind it. Micah started an introduction, "Oh, Emily, uh, this is my sister, Liz."

"Hi, uh…it's, uh," Emily stammered, recognizing the girl who hadn't held the elevator for her. Searching her mind for good thoughts, she remembered that Micah mentioned she was pregnant. "Congratulations."

Liz gave Micah a withering look, raising an eyebrow. "Yeah, thanks."

"Okay," Micah said quickly, gently pushing her to leave. "I'll meet you in the cafeteria."

Liz gave a cynical smile and an eye roll before walking out.

"What's up?" Micah asked.

Emily shook off the unpleasant vibe from his sister-who she had been warned about-and tried to recall her frustration from earlier. "Um…this might be a dumb question, but…" she began. Now that she was about to ask, she felt fearful. He had never felt more like her boss than at this moment. She pressed on, "The triple A repair…Did you not pick me because of the date?"

"No," Micah answered, seeming surprised. "You said you didn't want special treatment."

"Would it have been special treatment?" Emily asked, feeling even more embarrassed. "Or would you have picked me if not for all the other stuff going on?"

Micah made a face as he thought about it. "Probably would have picked you."

Emily's embarrassment turned to fear. Despite all of his assurances to the contrary, even the prospect of them dating had already affected her carrier. She sighed in frustration and looked away from him.

"Okay, so I screwed up and I over-corrected," Micah explained. "I'm not going to let it affect me in the future. I promise."

Emily didn't want promises. She wanted to feel comfortable again. "It's…it's my career, and I don't want to make a mistake."

"Hey, me neither," Micah said with an unnerving smile. "Which is why I'm not going to let you back out. Listen, I need to go get Liz before she burns the hospital down."

As though he knew she was about to put everything into questions, he walked out, and left Emily thinking.

She liked Micah. She REALLY liked Micah...but...but no matter how he claimed that a relationship or breakup wouldn't affect his work-related choices, he only said this because he didn't know any better. Now he had been tested and proved wrong. In some ways, it negated their entire conversation in the records room, including her agreement to give things a try. A new scenario presented itself: they would begin a relationship, but she would be uneasy all the time because every day at work she would wonder if he would overcompensate, and then every day she would ask him if he was over-compensating, which would make the over-compensation even worse. Eventually they would break up, because the drama was too frequent, but the stress and doubt would continue, because the issues of over-compensating would never go away. Not until one or both of them left, that is.

Emily felt herself shiver in dread. She missed Micah, in that moment-the Micah who had been her friend.

Deep in thought, Emily walked down the hallway and spotted Will. His glasses were off and his face was red. Had he been crying?

"Hey…are you okay?" Emily asked.

Will looked over at her, his eyes swollen and red. "Hey, um, yeah," he nodded, sniffling. Then he shook his head, "No, actually. No."

"Do you...want to talk about it?" Emily asked carefully.

Will nodded rapidly, wiping at his eyes and replacing his glasses. "Um, yeah, can we go get a drink?"

"You too, huh?" Emily said honestly.

...

Emily listened to Will's re-telling of the day with her usual sympathetic attention. She reached out and held his arm as he got through the hardest parts of it, and he felt stronger because of her touch. She echoed her agreement in everything that he had done, and never once looked at him in judgment. When he has finished, she said, "It's awful, Will, but it…it happens." She gave him a proud look, "But you admitted to it and that was really brave."

Will had tried to keep his references to Cassandra and her at a minimum, but he had hoped she would have picked up the part she played in his decision to tell. He decided that he wanted her to know. "I told her because of you," he said. "It's the way you see me. This guy who does the right thing. And I want to be that guy."

"It's who you are," Emily said simply.

She still wasn't getting it. Will told her, "It's who I am when I'm with you."

For a moment he thought Emily was comprehending his meaning. He wondered if she was thinking about Micah, and then he hated Micah for steeling away her attention if so. He remembered the countless other times he had told her things...given her little tokens that her obsessing brain could cling to...and though he had at first felt uncomfortable in the knowledge that everything he said to her had a double life in her imagination, he now felt incalculably angry that after saying something so sweet, she might be thinking of someone else.

"I should go," Emily said slowly. "Tyra's sleeping out so I'll finally get some peace and quiet."

"Yeah…" Will replied, feeling jealousy overcome him. "Did you, um, decide what you're doing with Micah? Make a decision?"

Emily returned to her seat, wanting to talk to her friend. "So confused," she said.

"Me too," Will said, feeling lightheaded and ready-ready to admit the conclusion he'd been coming to all day. "I'm confused about you, actually. And I know it's…it's awful timing. It's bad timing." Will saw Emily's look change. He knew that she was understanding him. "It's like, the moment you get over me, I start to think that maybe there's something that could…"

"Yeah..." Emily sighed, frowning. "Really bad timing..." Gathering her coat in a hurry, she prepared herself to leave.

"What was the moment that, uh, you got over me?" Will blurted. He felt panicked that the best part of him was about to be lost. "There had to have been a moment, right? What did I do?"

"You ran after Cassandra when I got that research position," Emily admitted. "And I realized that I wanted to be chosen."

Chosen. Choice. Choose. It was like he couldn't get away from it all. Everything in his life seemed to be pushing him, though, in a single direction. He couldn't help but smile at the absurdity of it all. "Wow," he said, trying to hide his smile.

"What?" Emily asked.

"That is actually why she broke up with me. She wanted me to…" Will said, "she want me to choose between you and her, and I couldn't. She said that meant I chose you." Will realized it was more than that. He didn't want his best friend to feel like the default. He added, "She was right. Emily, I did."

Emily stared at him for what seemed like several minutes. For the first time since he had met her, Emily's face was completely unreadable. Had he been clear enough? Was she even interested? Or was she in love with someone else now in that single-minded, sweet way that she loved?

Emily shook her head violently, seeming almost angry with him. "I…should go." And she did, leaving Will alone at the bar.

Will could barely catch his breath. He knew she intended to be alone tonight...a rare moment of quiet away from her imposed roommate, but what about tomorrow? Would Micah have wooed her by then? Would they have become an official couple? Will didn't dislike Micah, not truly, but he wondered if he could handle his jealousy with as much good humor as Emily and weathered hers.

He had tonight. He had a few short hours before everything changed. Tossing down the money for his bill, Will arose and walked swiftly to his car.

...

"Oh, you're that doctor who called earlier," said the man who worked at the pound, Dan. He let Cassandra in, despite being ready to close, and led her to the back.

Cassandra's eyes flitted around the cages in which a surprising variety of dogs looked anxiously back at her.

"They're a well-behaved bunch," said Dan. "I'll leave you to meet them. Back in a few."

Cassandra nodded and he left. She walked first to the prettiest of the dogs, but didn't feel herself connecting. Not that she would admit it, but Cassandra wanted a dog because of their bright spirits. She wanted unconditional love. She had been expecting a trip to the pound to drive away her sorrows, but the dogs behind bars were only making her feel worse.

Then she came to the last cage. Inside it sat a dingy black mutt, one ear flopped over, the other cocked at attention, his tongue hanging slyly out. He looked at her with a wink and approached the door. She held her hand for him to sniff, which he immediately licked.

"What's your name?" Cassandra said, feeling herself smile.

"He's only a year old," said Dan from the door. He came into the room. "Dog that young deserves a new start, not his prison name. You call him something special."

"Oh, no, I don't know..." Cassandra began. She hadn't thought that she would get such an unremarkable dog, drawn as she was to strong and beautiful. But then, how well had that been serving her recently? "But I guess that makes sense."

"You can't take him tonight," Dan said. "There's paperwork and I need references, but if you say you'll take him, I'll make sure nothing happens to him."

"Why?" Cassandra asked, reaching a hand in the Mutt's cage and petting his soft fur. "What would happen to him?"

"He's been here awhile," Dan said. "Going to be put down tomorrow."

"What? No!" Cassandra shouted, causing other dogs to yip. She looked into the Mutt's dark, soulful eyes, "I want him."

...

Emily stared at her water pitcher attempting to think about how she needed to think things through. She had only had the one beer, yet everything seemed hazy. She had woken up with thoughts of a future with Micah in her head, and now all she could think of was Will.

Had he really just told her that he...wanted to be with her? That couldn't be right. Yet he had said that he chose her.

It didn't matter! Emily had already said that she would go out with Micah. She couldn't just back out on him now. She would give him another shot at work-related things. Today was, as he said, a mistake. And if Will's life-changing mistake was any indication, even the best people made mistakes from time to time.

Even so, Emily's body tingled. It was conditioned, after years of being in love, to be turned on at the thought of Will, and his declaration-was is a declaration-had multiplied the effect. She sipped at her water, hoping it would cool her down.

Inexplicably, there was a knocking on her door. Micah was dealing with his sister tonight, surely he wouldn't be able to come by... Peaking through the peep hole, however, she saw Will. Emily lost control of her body for a moment, heart racing, skin tingling, mind racing. She took several deep breathes, frowned, smiled, broke into a sweat, and shivered.

She didn't know how, but she knew why he had come. And with the same inexplicable clarity she knew that it would be okay. This wasn't the kind of thing she had to think though. It had been thought through for years. There were no problems, no fear of favoritism, no effect on her career. There was nothing to justify. She opened the door.

Will's eyes met hers, his expression hungry. Emily didn't have the presence of mind to invite him in, so Will pushed his way inside. She felt his hand settle on her neck, and the warmth of it took her breath away. And then he was leaning in. There lips met. It was like fireworks were shooting off all around her. She felt every part of herself and every part of him.

Emily lifted her arm around his neck, and felt his strong hands run along her back. He shifted her legs to either side of his sculpted body and lifted her from the floor. Emily felt both completely safe and entirely in danger as she was carried into her to her bed. He set her down and there was a rush to undress. Will bared his torso, his flawless abs that Emily had peeked at so often, and she stared at them with her own heady hunger.

Then...he lowered his weight upon her and they rolled joyously across the bed, kissing, touching, gripping, and caressing. They rolled again and she was on top, looking down upon him, barely able to believe this was real. Will looked up at her, his eyes filled with emotion, and reached up a hand to brush her stray hair behind her ear.

She thought of how Micah had done the same thing earlier and felt a moment of guilt, but then Will's fingers moved to her lips, and thoughts of another man were gone. She smiled uncontrollably She loved him. She had always loved him. There had never been anyone else.


	14. Chapter 14

Episode 14

Tyra turned her key into the apartment she shared with Emily and heard the shower running. Humming softly, she set down the box of pastries she had brought and took off her coat, throwing it aside.

She grabbed a pastry, sat at the counter, and fingered though her mail.

The bathroom door opened and Emily emerged, her smile disappearing at the sight of her roommate.

"I brought breakfast," Tyra said as a greeting.

Emily froze like a deer in the headlights. "Uh, hi. Good morning," she said loudly.

Tyra thought she heard something fall in the bathroom. Her brain began to work very quickly. "Why did you leave the shower on?" She asked.

"Um, I, you know," Emily stammer, gesturing wildly at the door. Before she could say anything intelligent, the shower turned off and Will emerged.

Tyra's jaw practically hit the ground. Emily turned bright red.

"Oh, Tyra," Will said, wearing only a towel. "I uh, how are you?"

"Good," Tyra said quickly, beaming at him before turning back to Emily with a big smile.

"Great," Will said with a nod. "You know, I'm going to go put on some pants."

Tyra swiveled in her seat and gave him a knowing look. She took another bite of her pastry.

Emily stayed still until the door clicked shut, then she rushed to the counter.

"Oh my god," Tyra said, leaning closer. "Oh my god, oh my god! What happened?"

"We were talking at the bar last night," Emily said in a low, excited whisper, "and he said he chose me, but I was really scared, so I left, and then he came here! And last night...I can't even...I don't have words..."

Tyra listened in amazement. All she could say was, "How was it?"

Emily held her hand up to her heart, "Oh, Tyra!"

"What are you going to tell Micah?"

Emily looked startled. "I...I hadn't thought about it..."

"Of course not," Tyra offered with a wink. "I'm sure you were busy doing something else."

"I don't even know if I should tell him," Emily whispered. "I mean, I haven't talked with Will. I don't want to just assume that we're a couple now, and if we're not, then what does Micah have to be upset about, right?

"Um, I don't know," Tyra said, "maybe that you boinked another man in your bed?"

Emily looked like she was descending from her happy cloud. "You're right, I need to tell him. What should I say?"

"I don't know," Tyra admitted, "but do it fast. If he finds out on his own...just make sure to tell him first, okay?"

Emily nodded rapidly. "Right. Right, of course. Right."

Oh, and Roomie?" Tyra began.

"Yeah?" Emily looked up.

"I would normally never say this to a girl who was half naked, but you need to go get dressed," Tyra reminded. "You know, work?"

"Right."

...

Will and Emily stood in line, waiting for coffee. He caught her staring at him again and grinned, again, and she turned away once more with a shy smile. She wasn't sure she remembered how to be easy with him, though he seemed to still want her around.

"You don't think Tyra's upset with me, do you?" Will asked when she caught herself staring again.

"No," she said loudly. Correcting her volume, she asked, "Why?"

"I don't know, she seemed a little quiet during breakfast," Will said.

"Surprised, more like it," Emily said, then turned to hide her blushing face.

"Oh," Will nodded. He stood once more in the awkward silence of stares and blushing.

Finally, he couldn't contain his smile. "You're not going to say anything, are you?"

"About what?" Emily asked innocently.

"About last night," Will said, amused. "I hope you noticed that you, uh, had a pretty good time."

"No," Emily corrected, "I...I noticed that I had a pretty GREAT time."

"Yeah, me too." Will said gently, grinned from ear to ear. "So, do you, you know, want to talk about it?"

Emily considered. She didn't know how to ask him what it all meant, not without feeling more vulnerable than she ever had. The glow of being looked at by the man of her dreams was too sweet to jinx by such serious things as talking about it. "Is it weird that I don't?" Emily asked. When Will raised a brow, she explained, "I mean, what if we talk about it and I don't like what's said? Then I have to live with that. I'd rather live right now."

"Why," Will asked, leading, "what are you hoping to hear?"

Emily opened her mouth to answer, but stopped herself. She gave Will a knowing smile. "Good try, but no! I'm not starting The Talk."

"Come on Emily," Will said, reaching out and pushing Emily's stray hair behind her ear. "What do you have to be afraid of? You know you mean the world to me."

The strands were blown out again and Emily re-secured them, her heart fluttering. She stopped her wild imagination from reading too much into his words. It didn't mean he wanted to marry her and have babies, it just meant that he liked spending time with her.

Belatedly, she looked around to make sure Micah hadn't seen the intimate gesture.

Will looked around, perhaps taking her hint. "Okay, we don't have to talk about it at work," he said. "But let's at least agree to talk about it tonight. At my place." Will reached a subtle hand to meet hers and gently caressed her finger.

Biting back her nervous smile, Emily nodded.

...

"Micah, you can't be serious," Liz shouted suddenly, "I can't move to Minnesota."

"Why, what are you doing?' Micah asked. Liz stopped walking, offended, and he doubled back, regretting his words. "I, sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

"Ugh, you are unbelievable," Liz said, rolling her eyes and shoving a finger at him. "I don't know anything about cancer, you should go."

"Micah?" Emily's voice came as a welcome distraction. He turned to see her smiling sheepishly at him. "Can I talk to you?"

"Hey," he smiled, taking a step away from his fuming sister. "Yeah, what's up?"

Emily looked back at Liz, who was listening intently. "Oh, it's...it's kind of personal."

"Oh," Micah said, giving Liz a look and seeing her disregard him. He wanted nothing more than to find a secluded place and talk to Emily, but there happened to be a lot to do at the moment. "Um, actually, we're heading up to see Mom. But look, I made a reservation for Friday night. I figured you would be tired after a double shift tomorrow, so I thought it might be best to put it off a little bit."

"Right," Emily said carefully, "well that's actually what I needed to talk about..."

This is what Micah feared. He felt terrible about his mistake the day before and had been fretting about how to fix things. "No!" He insisted. "Okay, look, I know you're upset about that triple A repair thing, but I promise you'll assist on the next cool thing to come in, okay? I've heard rumors about a transplant coming up..."

"Micah, I'm bored," said Liz, coming up alongside them.

Micah didn't take his eyes from Emily's doubtful face, "That'll be fun, huh?"

"Micah!" Liz repeated.

"Okay," he told her, annoyed. Micah looked pleadingly back at Emily. "Look, I have to go, but we'll talk later, right? And put Friday in your calendar," he said as he walked towards the elevator with Liz, leaving Emily behind.

"You are going to make such a bad boyfriend," Liz observed dryly.

"What, why?" Micah asked.

Liz guffawed as the elevator door closed. "You totally just blew her off."

"Because you were pushing me," Micah exclaimed.

"That doesn't matter, Mouse, you shouldn't blow a girl off," Liz laughed. Then her seriousness returned, "Not that it matters. You can't date her, you need to go to Minnesota."

Micah frowned. "No, Liz, I can't," he said. "In case you didn't notice, I am currently head surgeon here. I can't just leave."

"Well, I can't either!" Liz said, crossing her arms.

"You say that, but then you don't give any reason why," Micah pointed out. "You don't have a job or a boyfriend, so why is it that you can't?"

"Because I don't want to!" Liz admitted.

"You..." Micah let this settle in. "You don't want to be with Mom?"

"Ugh, don't say it like that. Of course I want to be with Mom!" Liz cried. "I don't want to be with Mom in a hospital. Hospitals are your thing. To me, they're just full of pain...and, and death and sadness. I don't want to be there as she suffers, okay? I don't want to be there if she dies. Do you honestly think I could handle that?"

Micah rolled his eyes this time. "Don't do that. Don't sell yourself short."

"Why not?" Liz demanded. "You do all the time!"

"Yeah, well, I'm your big brother, I'm allowed to want more for you," Micah said.

Liz stamped her foot and scowled. "I'm scared, Micah," she sobbed. "I get upset with you for saying it, but you're right. I'm not...not good at things. I abandon things. What if I freak out and...and abandon her? How would I live with myself?"

"You won't," Micah said gently, shaking his head. "And I'll fly in every time I'm free, so it's not like I won't be around to help. She needs you, Lizard. Just...just think about it, okay?"

Liz swallowed, looking uncertain. She nodded.

...

Cassandra lined up for the beginning of rounds in time to see Will and Emily sharing an uncomfortably familiar look. Then Emily reached up and plucked a hair from his lab coat and Cassandra's breath caught. Something was different. She felt her breathing increase.

Several minutes after rounds were supposed to begin, Dr. Barnes rushed up to them, giving an apology that he had lost track of time with a patient. They all knew about his sick mother, so all were understanding. Micah rattled off a few instructions for the day, then turned to Emily and Will, who looked rigid now.

"Dr. Collins," Micah said to them, "you're needed in legal." Then he gestured for them all to follow.

Cassandra's head shot to Will, who nodded solemnly. He said something softly to Emily as she left with the group. Will sighed and turned the other way, when Casandra planted herself firmly in front of him.

"Why would you be needed in Legal?" She asked coldly.

Will looked past her, annoyed. "Probably because there with be negligence charges brought against me," he answered. "Maybe an investigation."

If possible, her gaze grew colder. "And why would there be negligence charges?"

"Because I told them about Maggie," Will admitted.

Cassandra's icy eyes were replaced with ones of fire. "I told you not to say anything!" She scolded so quietly that it was as a whisper. "No one would have noticed! Are you really so angry with me that you would endanger your future just to spite me?"

"Oh my god," Will said, looking amazed at this. "It has nothing to do with you! Telling them was the right thing. Even you see that, deep down, or you wouldn't have told me," he pointed out. Cassandra took a step back, shaking her head. He continued, "I'm sorry that you were the one to notice it, but you told me so that you could get the guilt off your own mind, so don't talk to me like you're somehow better when I go to do the same."

"That's not why I told you..." Cassandra started.

"Oh really, then why?" Will demanded. "You see, I think it was because you wanted to have power over me. Well, I'm not interested in sharing a secret with you, Cassandra. If you wanted to share things, you shouldn't have broken up with me."

"Yes, I should," she shouted. "And that doesn't mean I want you to throw your career away! You know that no top hospitals will take you now..."

"Whatever, okay? That's enough," Will said, cutting her off. "If you or some hospital is going to look down on me for doing the right thing, then I don't want anything to do with any of you. It's like Emily says-"

Cassandra felt herself react to that name: "Oh, Emily talked you into squealing, I should have known you'd listen to her over me!"

"Why wouldn't I?" Will snapped back. "She has always looked out for me-always put concern for me ahead of anything else."

"Right, of course," Cassandra said with self-satisfied smile. "How can anyone compare to Saint Emily?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Will asked angrily, then his face softened. "Why do you always try to compare? Why can't you just be you?"

"You know what? Nothing," Cassandra said, feeling flush. "It doesn't mean anything. Have fun with the investigation. Hopefully perfect Emily will help you through it," she snapped, storming away to join the others.

...

"You still haven't told him?" Asked Tyra, amazed, as they sat down together at lunch.

"He was with his sister!" Emily explained. "And then we were on rounds..." she sighed, putting a hand to her head. "He keeps smiling at me, Tyra, and each time he does I feel worse."

Tyra shrugged. "Maybe you should," she said, raising a mocking eyebrow.

"What?" Emily gagged. She lowered her voice to a whisper. "I thought you were excited about Will and I."

"Come on Pits," Tyra teased, "you know I couldn't be more proud of you. But, I love drama. Doesn't mean you aren't a total bitch."

Emily gave Tyra a helpless look and she laughed, offering, "Oh my god, calm down. It's all going to be okay."

"Is it?" Emily asked, sounding distraught. "I didn't mean to be a bitch, Tyra. Now he's going to hate me."

Tyra nodded that this was possible and pushed some chips into her mouth.

Emily gave her a withering look. "You were supposed to disagree with me."

"I don't bark on command," Tyra answered, feigning offense. "Nah, you kind of stepped in it this time."

Emily's face was again buried in her hands. "What should I do? What should I have done? What would you have done?"

"Enjoy it," Tyra advised with a shrug. "Look, you liked Micah when you didn't think Will was available-"

"No, I..." Emily interrupted, "I do like him. He wasn't a default..."

"But..." Tyra spoke over her, "you have been in love with Will FOREVER. So go with it. Get down with your hot, two-men-are-in-love-with-you self. We may have been in school forever, but we're still young. We're allowed to make sordid mistakes."

Emily's head shot up. "You think Will was a mistake?"

Tyra was stunned into a moment of silence. "Um, I didn't say that. Maybe you do."

Emily shook her head, "No, you said-"

"I was talking in general," Tyra said dismissively. "You want my advice? Talk to Micah, okay? Tell him you're sorry, but that you have to follow your heart. Then go to Will's and have crazy passionate sex."

"Tyra, I can't-" Emily protested, imagining that awful conversation.

"What, you're not going to Will's?" Tyra asked.

"No, of course I am," Emily replied matter-of-factly, surprised to find herself so thoroughly resolved.

"Good," Tyra said by way of changing the subject. "Because I was going to have my own naked party at our place. It'd just be awkward if you were there."

Emily was more than happy to discuss something else. The new topic wasn't particularly comforting, however. She couldn't tell an adult what to do, though the logistics of this made her uneasy. "Just don't have sex on my bed, okay?"

"Ugh!" Tyra cried, "it has man juices on it now. Gross. No, I've had my eye on the kitchen counter."

"Oh my god," Emily called, "do not have sex on my kitchen counter!"

"You mean OUR kitchen counter?" Tyra said with a wink. "How about we'll do it wherever we want and I just don't tell you?"

Emily nodded vigorously. That would probably be best.

...

Micah walked in on his mom and sister leaning over a baby magazine. "Sorry I had to rush out earlier," he said, announcing himself.

"It's no problem," Joyce said happily. She gave Liz's arm a pat. "See, he is very busy at work."

Liz looked up, less than amused. "Yeah, that's what everyone keeps telling me."

"Hey, so, I wanted to talk to you guys about something," Micah said, walking towards his mother. "Liz, you either already guessed or don't care, so, Mom: Emily and I are going out this Friday."

Joyce let go of the magazine and put both hands above her heart, her face excited. "For real? Oh, I'm so glad you finally asked her."

"Finally?" Micah teased, though he couldn't keep himself from smiling. "I thought we'd talked about this."

"I know, I know," Joyce berated herself. "But you could tell it was only a matter of time."

"What did you talk about?" Liz asked, sounding disinterested.

"Nothing you need to worry about," Micah answered. "I just wanted to give you a heads up that I won't be around on Friday."

"Don't talk to me like that," Liz said, her disinterest turning into disgust. "Why do you talk about things in front of me and then not explain? At least have the decency to talk about it when I'm not around."

Micah new it was best to give in. "I'm sorry, Liz, that was rude of me-"

"No, don't apologize," Liz cried. "Just tell me."

Micah looked around uncomfortably. He didn't particularly want to put into words the whole unpleasant situation. Joyce said instead, "She was infatuated with one of the other interns, but she's better now."

"What?" Liz spat in laughter. "She's better now? Wow. Well at least you talk about other people this way too."

Micah saw his mother withdraw herself, upset, and took over the explanation. "Mom just meant that, you know, she's over him," Micah said. "And now we're going out, so it took awhile to get things together, but now it's going to happen." He looked at his mother and gave her a knowing smile, "And yes, finally."

Joyce gripped his arm, a smile returned to her face. "I like her."

"I don't," Liz said quickly. "You should stay away from that one."

"Liz!" Micah whined.

"Honey, why would you say that?" Joyce asked.

"Don't look at me like that," Liz complained. "What do you want, I'm pregnant and hormonal. It's like I can't control myself. I can sense these things, though. You should listen to me."

"Um, right," Micah said dismissively, feeling uncomfortable at the mention of his sister's fake pregnancy. He had a thought, "Hey, I know, why don't you come down when we're on break and get to know her? I want you all to like one another."

Liz snatched up her magazine and opened it again. "You want me to meet the girl you haven't even dated yet?" She asked skeptically. "Seems weird."

"Come on," Micah urged. "I know you'll like her."

Joyce looked at her imploringly. "Just give it a try, okay?"

Liz looked back and forth between their desperate eyes. "Jeez! Fine!" She exclaimed. "You'd think I was meeting the Queen or something."

...

"Hey!" Will said loudly, coming up behind Emily. She lept. "Why so jumpy?"

"Oh, hey," she smiled sweetly upon meeting his eyes. Then she remembered he had asked a question. "I...Nothing. I thought you were someone else."

"Is there someone you're afraid of?" Will asked, concerned, leading her off to the side of the hallway.

"No...yes. I..." Emily stammered. She tried to find her words for a few minutes, then wondered that she was acting so oddly towards her long-time friend. "I don't know if I should be talking about this with you...I mean, not because things are weird now, just because it's-"

"Whatever else we are, which we need to talk about, by the way, we'll always be best friends," Will said, echoing her own thoughts. "You can tell me. Why are you so nervous?"

"I'm worried about Micah," Emily said simply.

Will wasn't expecting this. "Micah?" He said in surprise. "Why?"

"No I...it's not..." Emily felt shocked by his expression. "I just...I just feel bad. I haven't told him yet. You know, about us-"

"Is that something you have to tell him?" Will asked heatedly. "I mean, he keeps tabs of you at work, right? Not in your personal life. Unless...you don't still...like him do you?"

It was Emily's turn to look shocked. "I never said I didn't like him, Will."

"Well, no, okay," he said generously. "But, I'm confused, because I thought we" he pointed between them "had this connection."

Emily felt her heart leap as he admitted this. Then she realized that she had to tell him. "It's not like that! I'm not having doubts. I need to tell him because...before he chose Cassandra for that surgery and before you and I, you know, talked at the bar, I had agreed to go out with him."

"You what?" Will choked out.

"Then I had changed my mind, because he admitted that he WOULD have chosen me to assist in the surgery if not for...all that," Emily said in a rush. "And I'm pretty sure I had decided that I had probably changed my mind."

"I don't..." Will bit his lip and put his hands on his hips, looking around uncomfortably. "What are you going to do?"

"Well, I'm not going to go," Emily said desperately.

"Obviously," Will scolded. He brought a hand to his temple and pinched at it. "Emily, you have to tell him."

"I know!" Emily cried. "I will. I will as soon as I can," she looked around as though hopeful to see their Resident, but the hall remained empty. She rubbed her head. "Ugh, I need to talk about something else. How did your meeting with Legal go?"

Will smiled at her insensitivity. "How would that make for a better conversation?"

Emily cringed. "It wouldn't. Sorry. But I do want to hear about it anyway."

"The family is suing," Will said, putting on a strong smile. "Legal thinks they'll take a settlement. That's, uh, standard, I guess. They want me to be inspected, to find out if I should keep my license."

"Oh, Will," Emily said pityingly. "That's awful. It'll be okay, though."

"You always have confidence in me," he observed.

"Why wouldn't I be confident?" Emily asked seriously. "You have a great heart. You're a great doctor, and they're going to see that."

Will found himself smiling at the picture of himself her opinions created. "Aren't you sweet?"

Emily grinned and shook her head. "Not sweet. Just right."

Without a word, Will gently pushed Emily back into the hallway.

"Where are we going?" She asked him as they turned to corner.

Will leaned in to whisper, as they neared her office, "I don't know if I can wait til tonight."

...

Cassandra knew all of Will's flirty looks. She had, much as she did with everything, assessed and cataloged his every humor. So when she saw Will and Emily walking down the hall in close conversation, his hand gently hovering behind her back, she felt her heart sink. Then he leaned in and whispered something, and they soon disappeared into Emily's office.

Another intern bumped into her by accident and muttered a hurried apology, and only then did Cassandra realize that she hadn't been breathing. She knew men. She knew what secret trysts in the supply closet looked like. And she knew Will.

Breathing was difficult. She felt that each searing breath might bring forth the entire ocean of tears that she knew to be inside her. Her vision blurred as she stood, looking intently at the door through which the new lovers had gone. So she had been right...he had been in love with Emily. Blinking, Cassandra felt a tear roll down her cheak, and immediately hurried away, up the stairs, and to the roof.

Fussing with her phone, she dialed the only person she could think of.

"Denver City Pound, this is Dan speaking," said a familiar voice.

"Dan!" Cassandra cried, louder than she meant to. "Sorry, I just, um, could I possibly talk to Agamedes?"

"I'm sorry, who?"

Cassandra smiled in her embarrassment. "The dog. I'm sorry, this is Cassandra Kopelson. I was just...I thought maybe you could put the dog on the phone..."

There was a moment of silence on the other line. "Look, I haven't been able to process your application yet. You still need to provide references."

Cassandra's heart crashed into the ground. "Oh god, you must think I'm crazy-"

"No," he said. "No I promise I don't-"

"I just...I'm getting through a breakup, is all" Cassandra allowed herself to say. "And my ex has already...he already moved on, and people who would have been references for me aren't...I mean, I could ask Dr. Bandari...but she might kill me if someone asks her about something as minor as adopting a dog, and besides, she's on vacation, so it would be awhile..."

"Whoa, hey!" Shouted Dan, breaking through her cascade of words. "You know what? I have a good feeling about you. I mean, you're a doctor, right how bad could you be? Tell you what, Aga-whats-its..."

"Agamedes," Cassandra said.

"Aga...Right, he's feeling sick," Dan replied. "So, why don't you come in-"

Cassandra laughed lightly. "Wait, no. I'm a real doctor. You know, for people.'

"Yeah, I won't tell Jessie you said that," Dan replied. "I was going to suggest you be the one to keep him calm at the vet."

"Um, yes," Cassandra said, feeling bad. "I can do that. I'll have to...but it's fine. I'll come as soon as I can."

...

Emily felt a squeeze of her arm and jumped in surprise. She turned to see Micah once again accompanied by his sister.

"Whoa, hey," he said, reacting to Emily's surprise, "rough day?"

Emily laughed nervously, "Yeah, yeah, something like that. Are you guys, uh, just walking around?"

"Oh yeah," Micah smiled confidently. "Liz has been pretty cooped up, thought I'd give her a tour of the hospital's best vending machines." Micah gave his sister a pointed look as he said this, his eyes settling on one such machine. Liz refused to take the hint. "I know you wanted to talk. Sorry I've been so busy. There's all this paperwork for the Mayo trial, and you know, filling in for Bandari. It's all a little crazy."

"Yeah, no, I totally get it," Emily said breezily. She too looked at Liz, "Um, but, I really do need to talk to you."

Liz was now holding both of their attentions. She gave them a wicked smile and asked them, "Didn't anyone ever tell you that adults use their words?" Lifting her chin defiantly, she proceeded to walk where told, digging in her purse.

Emily watched her go and immediately wished she would come back. She wasn't ready to tell Micah.

Seeing her look of upset, Micah told her, "Hey, don't worry, okay, Friday night you'll have my undivided attention."

"Right, no," Emily replied. She knew this might be the last time they talked as friends. "Um, what if there's something I have to tell you that I'm afraid to tell you because I'm worried you'll never speak to me again?"

"Emily, that could never happen," Micah said with a smile and a shake of his head. "Why would you even think that?"

"Well, people make mistakes?" Emily offered, less sure of herself than ever. "I mean, not mistakes, that's not the right word. I just mean that..."

"Everyone makes mistakes, okay?" Micah told her comfortingly. He spoke to her as though she was speaking of a medical error she had made. "Just tell me what you think you did and I'll talk you off the ledge."

His eyes were so open and caring, and Emily feared that she would never see that look in them again. But she knew he would find out, so she took a deep breath and started: "Micah, last night I-"

Out of the corner of her eye, Emily saw an intern rush around the corner. "Dr. Barnes, you're needed in surgery!" He shouted.

Micah nodded to the intern and turned back to Emily, biting his lip. With an apologetic look, he took her hand and said, "I have to go. I'm sorry." As he ran out, he shouted back, "Watch Liz!"

Emily exhaled in frustration. She couldn't believe that she had failed yet again to tell Micah the truth. She turned to Liz at vending machine, who gave her a condescending grin. Emily smiled back warily.

"You don't need watching, right?" Emily asked, walking towards Micah's sister. "He's just being a big brother, right?"

"I don't know, a place like this has a lot of glass and needles," Liz said darkly. She gave Emily a searching look. "What's your deal anyway?"

"Deal?" Emily asked, surprised. "What...deal?"

"You like Micah?" Liz asked, her arms crossed.

"Yeah..." she answered, holding in all the awkward qualifications. "Yeah, of course, he's a great boss."

Liz tilted her head thoughtfully and blinked slowly.

"Hey, I've been looking for you," said Will's voice as he approached.

Emily smiled sublimely, then worried that Liz might get the wrong idea...or the right one.

Liz did. "Who's the Ken doll?" She asked.

"He's not..." Emily began, then took a deep breath. "Liz, this is my...my friend Will, he's an intern too. Will, this is Micah's sister, Liz."

Liz pursed her lips. "Will the intern," she said knowingly. "How's it going?"

"Uh, good. Good. Nice to meet you. We all, uh, we all really like your brother," Will stammered, holding out a hand to shake, which she accepted with a sly grin. Pulling his hand away as though burned, Will turned to Emily, "Hey, did you say anything yet?"

Emily hoped the panic wasn't clear in her eyes as she looked between Liz and Will. "Uh, no," she said. "No, but I will."

Liz shook her head and walked away. Remembering Micah's request, Emily ran after her, tying to sound chummy, "Hey, um, if you want I could get us some snacks. Premium stuff. Miles above the vending machines."

"Yeah, don't worry about it," Liz said shortly. "Gotta get back upstairs. Dying mother, you know."

"Oh, Liz," Emily started, "look, I can-"

"I know the way," Liz cut her off. "Tell Ken bye for me."

Without a second glance, Liz turned and left. Emily stared after her, a sense of panic in her chest. She had to tell Micah.

...

Cassandra tried not to think about how cute the vet was. It was irrelevant to the health of her new dog, and therefore nothing but a distraction...but then he would lean in close as she held Agamedes gently, and she would smell the warm, musky scent coming from his carmel skin. Their eyes met several times as he examined the dog, each time accompanied by an ever-widening smile. Despite her resolve to be upset, she found her spirit lightening.

"It's just a touch of pneumonia," Jessie said. "They rescued a sick pup a week or so ago, and it made the rounds of the back room. He'll be just fine, though, won't you Champ?" He gave the dog's head an affectionate scratch, then looked at Cassandra. "Or wait, sorry, what did you say his name was?"

"Agamedes," she said, petting him also.

"Huh," he nodded. "That's an odd choice."

"Not at all," Cassandra disagreed solemnly. "In Greek mythology she was a powerful doctor who healed people using only her knowledge of the earth. "

"You do realize that this is a boy dog," Jessie said after a moment of thought. "That you're giving a girl name."

Cassandra couldn't help herself. "Jessie is a girl name."

"Touchee," he said with a broad smile. "Well, it's nice. Thoughtful. And epic! Greek Mythology? I was named after my mom's favorite TV character."

"Full House?" Cassandra asked.

"Nope. Saved by the Bell," he answered, cringing.

Cassandra threw her head back and laughed.

"So, yeah," Jessie said after she'd caught her breath. "Good choice."

"Thank you," Cassandra said softly. Their stare lingered and she asked awkwardly, "So, uh, what do I need to do?"

"Oh, right," Jessie stood up, shaking his head. "Uh, let me get my prescription pad. You know, it's funny that they give me one of those, considering I'm not a real doctor," he said with a wink.

Cassandra found herself smiling once more. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Of course not," Jessie said sweetly. He scribbled on his clipboard and handed her a slip of paper. "Here, just follow these instructions and uh," he added with a rakish smile, "that's my number on the back, in case you, you know, need it. Anyway, I'll let you get your things together," he said, giving the dog a final scratch. "It was good seeing you again, Agie!"

He winked again at Cassandra as he walked from the room, and she couldn't keep from grinning. She wouldn't call him, at least she didn't think she would call him, but the attention felt nice, even if she wasn't ready for it. She looked down at her new dog, "He's pretty cute, right?"

...

Emily hung her lab coat in her locker, and saw Will come in from the corner of her eye. "Hey, can I talk to you?"

"Of course," Emily said. Then she added coyly, "Oh wait, unless you want to talk about what we agreed not to talk about."

"Why would I talk about that?" Will teased, "No, I um, I just read Julie's statement. You know, the wife of the woman I..."

"The woman who died?" Emily corrected. "Will, you don't have to think about it like that. It could just as easily have been any of us."

"But it wasn't. It was me," he said. "And...the things she wrote...they were so...I mean, not all that long ago she was trying to set me up with her daughter."

Emily raised an eyebrow.

"Her idea, not mine," Will added. "And anyway...I just...It's so amazing how her opinion of me could change so quickly. To here, I'm the devil now."

"You're not the devil," Emily said. "You're the doctor who made a mistake. And you were following protocol, which has saved so many lives before. It's tragic that-"

"But I swore to cause no harm!" Will interrupted. "It was my promise. She didn't need to die!"

Emily felt her heart drop, "I know-"

"No, you don't," Will said, his passion growing, "because Julie wrote that she hadn't told her wife she loved her that day. She wrote that Maggie died without hearing that from her..."

"She knew, Will-" Emily broke through his shout.

He turned to her, "Look, I know that you don't want to talk about things," he said, "but it makes be nervous, to have a topic that we hold back from one another. That's not us."

Emily was taken aback by the sudden segue. He was right, she was being unfair to them both. "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking-"

"Maybe it's too soon to have a serious talk," Will dismissed her apology. "But Emily, I want you to know that I really like being around you. I don't know what that means, but-"

"I really like being around you too," Emily said suddenly, cutting him off. "And it doesn't have to mean anything yet. I don't think I'm ready for it to mean anything yet. All I know is that I want to make you soup tonight. And massage your shoulders, because you've had a really hard day, and I want to help. Plus, you have really nice shoulders."

Will looked at her seriously for several minutes, and then grinned slowly, "Soup, huh?"

"Why would you mock soup?" Emily asked. She began her defense: "Soup is very comforting, in fact in Ancient Greece-"

She was cut off by his lips on hers.

"What were you saying about Ancient Greece?" Will asked, pulling back.

"I don't remember," she said with a satisfied smile.

...

"Flowers?" Joyce asked, her eyes lighting up when Micah came into the room with a bouquet in hand. She pointed to her chest, but he shook his head guiltily and she nodded her understanding.

"What are those for?" Liz asked, leaning over their mother's toe nails with nail polish in a deep shade of red.

"Well," Micah said cheerfully, "in some societies, it is considered romantic for a male to bring flowers to a female."

"Ooh, where'd you buy them?" Joyce asked, ignoring Liz's derisive snort.

"Oh, uh," Micah said awkwardly. "So, we have a famous patient right now who has more flowers than she can stand. She practically begged me to take them..."

"Oh my god, you took them from a sick lady?" Liz smirked. "Romance isn't dead, it's just hospitalized."

"Ha, funny," Micah said, giving her a withering look. He glanced at his mom, who smiled. "Wish me luck."

"What do you need luck for?" Joyce asked. "She already said yes."

"Oh, you know," Micah said vaguely. "She said she wanted to talk about something this morning, so I don't actually know anything, but I'm going to go make sure everything's okay."

"Yeah, don't do that, Mouse," Liz advised.

"Why not?" He asked innocently.

"Because you'll regret it, okay?" Liz answered, putting the cap on the nail polish.

"What is there to regret?" Micah dismissed with a grin. He turned back to Joyce. "Hey, so I was thinking, maybe I should invite her with us-"

"Are you not hearing me?" Liz yelled. "Don't do that, Micah."

"Calm down, okay?" Micah instructed. "I get that you don't like her, I don't pretend to know why, but if this is because of Oliver-"

"Oh my god," Liz cried, "why do you have to go there? It has nothing to do with him!"

"Then why can't you just give Emily a chance?" Micah demanded.

"Because she's banging some else, okay?" Liz blurted.

There wasn't a moment of shocked silence, then Joyce reached towards her daughter with a pitying look. "Oh, honey..."

"You can't just say stuff-" Micah shouted. "Liz, that's absurd."

"Oh, oh, 'that's absurd'. I'm sorry," Liz said, getting worked up, "which of us here is a woman? Which of us here can read the expressions of women?"

Seeing his agitated expression, Joyce reached a comforting hand to her son. "It's okay, Micah."

"No, no, it's not okay," he snapped. "She thinks she can say these things to get our attention. She always does this." He turned to his sister, "You always do this, Liz."

"No, Micah," Liz defended, "I'm not-"

"It's none of your business!" Grabbing the flowers, he turned on his heals.

"Don't go!" Liz shouted.

"Stay out of it!" Micah shouted back.

Micah took the elevator to the main floor and collapsed on the side of it as it moved. He wasn't sure why, even now, Liz could get him so worked up. Stepping out, he moved towards the locker room, where he hoped to find Emily alone.

She was there, but so was Will. Micah's heart fell as he saw Will leaning in to her, and his entire body lost feeling as their lips locked.

It was so unexpected, even with Liz's disregarded words, that Micah couldn't think, couldn't move. He felt a hot disgust settle on him when, as Will pulled away, Emily looked back at him with adoration on her face.

This couldn't be happening. What was happening? Micah's stomach fought to throw up its contents and his brain sent him a similar retching sensation. In a moment, his utter disgust turned into blinding anger. How could she do that to him? She was supposed to be his! They had decided...

In that same moment, Emily saw him from the corner of her eye, and turned a guilty face towards the door. Micah spun on his heal and rushed away.

He heard her hurried steps behind him, and her panicked voice crying, "Micah! Micah, I was trying to tell you!"

But Micah doubled his speed-the rapid rush of the heartbroken. As he left Emily in the dust, he heard her call his name. Pushing his way through a heavy double door, he let it slam, satisfyingly loud, between them.


	15. Chapter 15

"Hey, thanks for the ride, Stranger," Tyra said, looking over at Emily in the driver's seat.

"Stranger-" Emily scoffed, "come on, we haven't lived together long enough for you to have gotten used to having me around!"

"Calm down, I'm kidding," Tyra said with a roll of her eyes. "I think it's great. You spent the first part of the year being obsessed with a guy, and now you have him. That's a win in my book."

"Yeah," Emily agreed contentedly. Then her expression changed. "I still feel bad though."

"About Micah?" Tyra asked.

Emily nodded. "I mean, he still hasn't said a word to me," she continued. "There was a week or two earlier when he was trying to keep things professional and he barely said anything. I thought I would go crazy. This is so much worse. Now there's guilt."

"He'll come around," Tyra said. "In the mean time, just give him space."

"I don't want to give him space!" Emily cried. "I hate the silence. I can tell he's angry, and I wish he would just yell at me already."

"Right," Tyra snorted, "because yelling fixes things..."

"Tyra!" Emily yelled. "I need him know that I'm sorry-that I never meant to hurt him."

"Have you told him that you're sorry?" Tyra asked thoughtfully.

"Yes," Emily answered, "every time I see him, but he doesn't say anything!"

"If you've told him, then he knows that you're sorry," Tyra said forcefully. "You're upset because you need him to forgive you."

Emily deflated a little, realizing that her frustration was caused by her own selfishness. She looked earnestly at her friend, "I know I should be happy. I know that...that Will is everything I've wanted...but, Tyra, that kiss! The way he smiled at me...How him being angry makes me feel...I don't understand why I can't just be happy!"

Tyra considered this. "Do you want my advice?"

Emily parked her car in the hospital lot and turned to examine Tyra's face. She nodded.

"Let things happen," Tyra offered. "You both need time."

Emily turned off the ignition, looking thoughtful. She looked up at the hospital and saw something that gave her a frightened look. Tyra followed her eyes, spying Micah's dark-haired sister staring at them in the car while smoking a cigarette.

"She's scary," Tyra observed.

"You have no idea," Emily said. Tyra gave her a questioning look and Emily continued, "I can't prove that she's been doing anything, but things keep going badly, and afterwords I always see her smiling at me."

"Going badly...?" Tyra prodded.

"Like, things in the supply closet fall on me," Emily explained. "Or things fall or are misplaced. Or things are left on the floor and I trip. And stop looking at me like that-I know I'm clumsy, but why is she there leering at me EVERY TIME? I think Micah told her."

Tyra watched thoughtfully as Liz flicked her cigarette butt into the driveway and went back into the hospital.

...

"Hey," Will grinned as Emily joined him around Dr. Bandari, who was being welcomed back by the interns. "I missed you this morning." He brushed some stray hairs behind her ear and Emily shot a nervous look towards Micah, who stood at their Attending's side. He had seen Will's gesture and quickly looked away. Emily's heart fell at both his reaction and at Will's, who had noticed her reluctance at his touch.

She touched her hair and gave him a quick smile. "I, um, I missed you too. But it was good to have some time with Tyra."

Will nodded, his eyes shooting to Micah, who was listening to stories of Dr. Bandari's vacation. "Yeah, girl time," Will said distractedly. "Good."

"Alright, enough," Dr. Bandari called and the interns hushed. "Yes, it was an excellent trip, no, I am not going to share the pictures with you. However, I am glad to be back. Let's get to work. I need an assistant later today for a project. Dr. Owens," she said, finding Emily in the group, "Dr. Barnes has requested your assistance today, so, Dr. Collins, why don't you take her place?"

Emily's heart fell once more. Micah had requested her? She looked at him and met his eyes, but they were unreadable. Did that mean he was on the path to forgiving her? His stern look said otherwise.

"I will be assigning the other cases," Bandari was saying. "Follow me."

"I get to be the research assistant today," Will said, trying to look impressive. Emily gave him a thin grin, hardly able to process what was happening. Why had Micah requested her? Will was wondering the same thing. "Look, maybe this will be a good time to really talk to him. I mean, we both need to get back on his good side...he is our boss, right?"

"Right," Emily concurred. She followed Dr. Bandari off into the hospital, each step increasing her dread.

...

AJ came up alongside Micah as he was finishing his paperwork and leaned in. "I heard you requested Dr. Owens for surgery. What's up with that?"

"What do you mean what's up with that?" Micah asked, not looking up. "This is a teaching hospital, that's what we do."

"Hey, come on. Don't play coy with me," AJ scolded softly. 'You know the whole hospital is aware of Dr. Owens and her fling with the guy who isn't you."

Micah's eyes flickered up for a moment before returning to his writing. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay," AJ offered, "stew in it all you want. But when you're ready to move on, let me know."

"Move on?" Micah said casually. "Why would you think that I haven't already?"

"You requested her for a surgery!" AJ said, shoving a finger in his face.

Micah held up calming hands. "I was just fulfilling a promise," he explained. "Before, when we were...when I thought...I promised that I'd request her for the next procedure. I had made a mistake, and I owed her that. I'm not about to break my word just because she's a-"

"Cheating bitch-?" AJ spat.

Micah was surprised to find that AJ's uncharitable description upset him "Hey, that's not necessary, okay?"

AJ's eyes narrowed, "Are you..."

Micah cut him off, not wanting to hear or think about this any more. "Don't start. Just don't start, okay?" Micah complained, "When did work become about gossip and people's personal lives? Can it just be about work for a little while?"

"You want to talk about sickness and dying?" AJ observed. "That's dark, dude."

"It's bright, trust me," Micah disagreed, turning back to his paperwork. "Work seems bright."

AJ stood silently, staring at him for several moments. Micah saw, but did not react. AJ said softly, "It kills me to see you like this. What can I do? I know some great girls, I can give any of them a call."

"I don't need to be set up-" Micah said, his eyes shooting to his friend in indignation.

"Then what?" AJ asked in a low whisper. "I let you keep walking around like a ghost? Dude, this can't go on."

"I don't know," Micah hissed back. "I don't what would help. But whatever it is, I'll figure it out one my own, alright? And in my own time." Closing the case folder and setting it in the empty nurse's station, Micah turned towards the elevator. "And if you will excuse me, my dying mother is about to go in for scanning, and I should be there."

...

By the time Tyra saw the wet patch on the floor it was already too late. Emily's foot slipped and she fell ungracefully to the floor. Will and Emily surveyed her for damage, and concluded that besides a bruise and a wet lab coat, she was fine. Tyra, however, watched as Liz smiled at them from the end of the hall, a half-empty water bottle in hand.

"We should get you a cream for that bruise," Will said, guiding Emily off.

"I should call maintenance," said Tyra, heading off towards Liz before waiting for a response.

Liz was surprised to see someone pursuing, and slipped away into the elevator. It closed before Tyra could get it, but she was that it was going up. She rushed to the stairs and up to the sixth floor. She arrived in time to see the dark haired girl getting out and turning down the hall. Tyra followed with a confident grace. She went to the nurse's station and called maintenance while watching Liz disappear into a room, then she followed. The room was empty, the patient having been moved, presumably for tests, and Liz was sitting by the window, considering her box of cigarettes.

"You know those things will kill you," Tyra said, coming into the room.

"You're all so original, I don't know how you can stand it," Liz said, making a face. "Alright, you found me. Stupid to run from a doctor in a hospital, I guess." She pulled a cigarette from the pack and put it to her lips.

"Wow," Tyra breathed, crossing her arms, "you so can't smoke in here."

Liz rolled her eyes and shoved the cigarette back in the box. "Ugh, doctors: slowly taking away all the things that make life worth living," she said. 'So, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Really?' Tyra asked, brow raised. "You're going to pretend that you haven't been messing with Dr. Owens? That's your strategy?"

Liz sneered. "So what if I am? Bitch deserves it."

"Yeah, no offense," Tyra said, "but what could you possibly know about any of it?"

"I know that one moment my brother was talking happily about a date and the next he was sobbing in his car," Liz explained. "So what exactly have I missed?"

"He told you?" Tyra asked, careful.

"He didn't have to," Liz answered. "I figured it out all by myself."

"You need to understand that Emily is a good person," Tyra said firmly. "She would never have hurt your brother on purpose. And you need to back the hell off."

Liz stood and approached, angry. "No, here's what YOU need to understand," she said, "My brother...is the best person in the world. You may think you've met someone better, but you haven't. That's not possible. So if someone hurts him, whether they meant to or not, they're on my shit list. And people on my shit list don't get the luxury of me 'backing the hell off.' They aren't worthy."

Tyra placed her hands on her hips. Her lip curled. "You think you're tough, huh?"

They stood paces apart, measuring the reaction of the other. Liz sneered, "Try me."

Tyra opened her mouth to reply, but her beeper went off. She smiled reluctantly. "You're lucky I have to answer these things right away," she said. "If you mess with Emily again, I'll be back."

"I look forward to it," Liz said, not moving.

...

"Dr. Kopelson," said the interviewer, "you were assigned to this case with Dr. Collins, correct?"

Cassandra looked at Will, who sat beside her, and nodded. "Yes, we had both been assigned."

"And how did you come to be acquainted with the actions of Dr. Collins?" Asked Dr. Levitz.

Cassandra looked again at Will, feeling nervous for the first time. She hadn't been a part of what could be called malpractice, but she had realized the mistake and brought it to Will's attention. It would reflect badly on her to be caught hiding her knowledge of it. "I, uh..."

"She heard about it from me," Will jumped in. Cassandra's eyes shot to him. "I...uh, we...I was used to confiding in her, and asking her advice was a comfort."

"And she suggested you report to admin?" Asked Dr. Levitz.

"Well, I did...uh, report to admin," Will said, as though that explained everything.

"And Dr. Kopelson-" Dr. Levitz began.

"I appreciate that you want to be thorough," Will interrupted, "but I promise you, she had nothing to do with it. It's all on me."

"Very well," Dr. Levitz said, placing his paperwork in a stack. "If you two are finished, I have a lot to think about."

Cassandra remained, confused, in her seat until Will motioned for them to leave. He had barely closed the door when she blurted, "Why did you do that? You could have ended my career by telling them I knew and kept it quiet."

"Why would I want to end your career?" He asked, as though the thought had never crossed his mind.

Cassandra was left to wonder why her overly-ambitious brain had immediately gone there. Of course Will wouldn't plot against her like that. "I don't know," she said, reluctant to meet his eyes. "I thought there might be hard feelings, with the way things ended."

"You mean the part where you asked me to choose between my girlfriend and my best friend?" Will asked. "Or the part where you are completely fine that we're over? Because while not wanting to ruin your career, I am pretty angry."

Cassandra shook her head. "Thank you. It means a lot that you didn't say anything."

"Yeah, well, what good would it do?" Will asked. "You weren't involved in the worst of it. And just because your blind ambition is unappealing doesn't mean that you deserve to be punished for my sins."

"My...my blind ambition?" Cassandra echoed. "You really think that of me?"

"I KNOW that of you," Will said. "You would have had me choose to lie just to save myself some career discomfort. That lie would have followed me everywhere and the guilt would have eaten me away."

"Why did you do it, then?" Cassandra asked, feeling his hypocrisy. "Why did you lie about me?"

"I'm not about to shove my morality into your choices," Will said haughtily. "If you wouldn't tell them, then that's for you to live with. I would never hurt you on purpose."

Cassandra knew he meant this to impress her, but she found it absurd. "That's rich. This whole thing is rich," she scoffed. "You lied to me about being at Emily's place, lied to me about being in love with her, but suddenly you can't lie about this-"

"I wasn't in love with her, Cassandra!" Will interrupted. "I was in love with you. But you kept telling me I must be in love her, so I couldn't stop thinking about it. I felt like I had to hide everything. It was exhausting. I would much rather have told you the truth."

"And what was that?" Cassandra asked, pissed.

"That I was only interested in you," Will said roughly. "I am not a chronic liar, Casandra. You pushed me to that. You were, you ARE, so...intense...that you don't know how to just be happy...for and with other people."

Cassandra rolled her eyes. "This would all be a little more believable if you weren't currently WITH Emily."

"Yeah, that one is on you too," Will said. "You told me I chose her. Before I dated you, I turned Emily down, but you kept insisting that I hadn't. And yes, I've changed my mind about her, but it wasn't me that did it."

Cassandra blinked rapidly, her mind rearranging itself without her control. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Look, uh, I've been pretty happy, so I'm not trying to sound upset," Will said gently, "but, as a friend, I think you should know that when you try so hard to control and manipulate the people in your life, sometimes you drive them to do the very things you were warding against. I worry about you. I worry that you will drive away everyone that cares about you by trying to hold on to them too tightly."

Cassandra watched him walk away, a biting retort on her lips, left unsaid. She felt small convulsions as her body fought against his words. He couldn't really be suggesting that SHE had caused her boyfriend to be obsessed with another woman. That was absurd. Or was it? She had been so insecure about their friendship that she had tried to set Emily up on a date, which had made her think Will was jealous, which had made him lie about crashing on her couch. For a moment all of Cassandra's personal biases were stripped clear and she could see the chain of events that she had created in her desire to hold tight to the man of her dreams.

Unable to breathe in the stuffy hospital, Cassandra went up to the roof without a coat and let the cold air cool her down.

...

Emily copied Micah as he scrubbed very carefully at his hands, removing from them all traces of dirt. He could see from the corner of his eye that she looked over at him repeatedly, but his attention remained directly ahead.

Setting down the soap, he placed his hands under the water. As it washed over him, he remembered other times they had spent in this room. He remembered helping her into the smock before her first cut-remembered how close he had felt to her in that moment. Then he remembered laying with her in the records room, smiling. Then he remembered walking in on her and Will.

Every time he was around her it was like that-good memories that came to a screeching halt. He saw her looking at him again and shut off the water. She did the same.

"Micah," she finally said as he turned to enter the operating room.

Knowing that he must answer if her concerns were about the procedure, he turned to meet her eyes.

"Thank you for the opportunity to work with you," she said. "I, um, I've missed working with you."

She missed "working" with him. That was not an encouraging thought. He remained stony-faced and silent.

Emily's face passed by many expressions. "I just...I was just thinking about how much I appreciated having you there for my first cut."

That they had been sharing a thought filled Micah's heart with butterflies. It was, to him, further proof that they were meant to be together. So why was she sleeping with someone else? His reaction annoyed him. It angered him.

"We need to focus on the patient now," Micah said coldly, trying to let his anger pass. "You can't be unprofessional when people's lives are at risk."

...

Cassandra turned the corner to see her idol, Dr. Bandari, wiping a tear from her eye. Knowing that this was a punishable offense, she pretended not to see and went to walk on.

"Hey, you," Bandari shouted roughly, collecting herself. "Sorry, Dr. Kopelson. Come with me."

Cassandra followed obediently, thinking she had seen something she wasn't supposed to see.

"Tropical islands seem to have disagreed with me," Bandari said, answering the unasked question.

"The mosquitoes can be pretty vicious," Cassandra agreed.

"Mosquitoes, right," Bandari sighed. She motioned towards a room. "Listen, the situation with the patient in 512 is getting worse, I want to put a third intern on it."

Cassandra nodded, accepting an offered clip board.

Dr. Bandari started towards the elevator and turned back. "Dr. Kopelson, I don't know what you think you saw..."

"Nothing, Dr. Bandari," she said. "An allergy."

Bandari nodded, pushing the button to go up. She looked at Cassandra thoughtfully. "You might want to be a little more careful with your boyfriend. They stray so easily."

Cassandra gave her a confused look. "I didn't know you paid attention to intern drama..."

"I don't," Bandari said with her usual impatience. "I have eyes."

"Will and I broke up, anyhow," Cassandra said, afraid of sharing too much. "He can stray to who ever he wants."

"Well, I suppose it was only a matter of time," said Bandari, pushing the button again in her impatience.

"Right, the 'men stray' thing," Cassandra murmured.

"No," Dr. Bandari answered, "because you're such a bitch."

Cassandra gave her idol a murderous look, and then turned her amazed gaze to the floor. She couldn't even image what to think.

Bandari realized her bluntness and said a quick, "I'm sorry, it's been a rough first day back." She pinched at the bridge of her nose. "What I meant was that we have that in common."

"Well, that's a compliment to me," Cassandra said.

"Is it?" Bandari asked, her eyes betraying the emotion that hid there.

"Of course!" Cassandra insisted. "You have an amazing career at the top of your field. You have a beautiful marriage-you two looked amazing at the fundraiser-"

"I thought so too," Bandari said with a haunted expression. "And yet...the paper have been filed. We didn't even make it to the plane. I spent my vacation packing up his things."

"Oh god..." Cassandra gasped, her jaw dropping. "I didn't know."

Dr. Bandari made a sound of disgust. "Don't look at me like that," she commanded. "I don't want your pity. I see someone heading down the same path as me and wonder what I would have done at that age if someone had warned me against it. So I'm warning you against it."

"I...I don't understand..." Cassandra said, gazing up at the legendary Gina Bandari. "You're the most amazing woman I know. You've saved so many lives..."

"But not my own, Dr. Kopelson," she said, getting into the elevator. "Don't be like me."

...

"Hey," said Will, coming into the locker room. He could see that Emily looked upset. She was applying a bandaid to her finger. "You okay?"

"Yeah, it's just..." she started. Then she looked embarrassed and changed the subject. "You know..."

Will could see that she was trying very hard to hide her pain. He stepped closer and grabbed her hand. "Hey, really, are you okay?"

"I don't know anymore," Emily answered with a sniffle. "I thought I would be. I thought I would talk to Micah and feel better, but things just keep getting worse!"

Will felt a stab of jealousy at the mention of Micah's name, but he immediately thought of what he had told Cassandra earlier, and he let it go. He was determined to support Emily and her friends, despite the fact that one of those friends had kissed her... "How so?"

"We were in surgery for hours and he didn't say a word to me that wasn't medical-related," she cried. Then she dropped the locker room's first aid kit and cursed, "Ugh, and his sister!"

Will had leaned down to pick up the scattered supplies, but looked up quickly. "His sister?"

Emily explained all the little pranks that had left Emily battered and bruised over the last week, and all Will wanted to do was wrap her in his arms and carry her away. He considered what he would have said before they were dating, however, and chose instead to ask, "Why are you letting her do that to you?"

Emily refuted, "I am not LETTING her do that-"

Will winced. "Aren't you? Aren't you kind of playing the victim?"

"How can you say that?" Emily demanded. "I am not playing the victim!"

"Mmm...maybe a little?" Will persisted. "You could just tell his sister to stop."

Emily gave him a look of confused betrayal.

"And, furthermore," Will continued, "if you ARE so obsessed with getting him to yell at you, maybe you should go yell at him. I know I appreciated it when our rolls were reversed."

Will thought Emily would deny her feelings again, but she sat instead, thinking it over. She winced as the bruise on her hip flared painfully.

Will laughed despite himself, putting a gentle hand on her head. "Oh my god, what is that family doing to you?" He thought that maybe whisking her away might be the kindest thing for her. "Alright, enough of this for tonight. I'll go pick up some sandwich fixings, you go pick out a movie, and we'll meet back at my place and figure out what you should do."

Emily nodded in agreement and Will walked her to her car. Except her car wasn't there-at least, not the way she had left it that morning. It was covered in egg yolks and toilet paper, which had crusted together in the chilly air.

Will looked over to see Emily's reaction, but he saw only resolve. "You're right. I should have stopped this days ago," she said. "I need to go take care of this."

Without another word, she took off back towards the hospital.

...

"You have to call her off!" Shouted Emily, as she burst into the break room where Micah sat with his computer.

"What?"

"Your sister," Emily explained loudly. "All of it. It has to stop."

Micah sat up, closing his computer and setting it aside. "What are you talking about?"

"The water on the floor, the egged car, the needle in my locker!" Emily shouted, holding up her bandaged hand.

Micah's look softened. "Are you okay?" He asked, though remaining on the defensive. "Look, I didn't know. I mean, she does that kind of thing, but obviously I'll tell her to stop. We leave tomorrow anyway, even if she won't listen." He began to walks towards the door, his eyes on the floor.

"It's not just her," Emily said to his retreating back. "It's you too. It has to stop!"

Micah was surprised at the frustration in her voice. "What have I done?"

"You won't talk to me!" Emily shouted. "You won't even-"

"What do you want to talk about?" Micah asked rhetorically. "How you...how you chose someone else? How you agreed to go out with me and then..." His voice cracked. He couldn't say it.

Emily backed down, saying softly, "I just want things to be the way they were."

Micah took the offense. "They can't be the way they were, Emily," he told her. "I just can't pine after you indefinitely."

"You weren't pining after me..." Emily argued.

"How would you would know that?" Micah demanded. "How would you know anything about me? You were so wrapped up in your own drama that you didn't notice, so somehow that makes it okay?"

"No, I..." Emily stammered, looking mortified. "I thought we were friends..."

"I can't just be your friend, Emily," Micah said. He hadn't thought this before, but it felt true. It hurt too much. "That is not a thing that I want to do."

"So, so what?" Emily said on panic as he tried to leave again. "That's it? We'll never speak again?"

Micah sighed. he couldn't deal with this. "I can't talk to you about this. I need space."

"But I wanted to-"

"I don't really care, Emily," Micah interrupted roughly. "Whatever you want or wanted-I don't care. I can't keep caring."

Emily looked defeated. "But we'll still-how do we-"

"How do we work together?" Micah finished. "That's easy: I'm your boss. Treat me like your boss."

"But Micah..." Emily started.

The sound of her saying his name made him cringe. He held up a hand to stop her. "How about we go with Dr. Barnes, alright?"

Leaving her wide eyed in the break room, he walked out.


	16. Chapter 16

Emily stared at the flakes of snow with a soft, out-of-focus look. She couldn't remember what she had been thinking about, but when she heard a gentle scuff on the sidewalk behind her, she turned around to see Micah approaching and her mind went blank.

Giving her a smile in greeting, he took a step closer. "That same crisis again, huh?" He asked.

"Different one," Emily said with a shake of her head. "Did you have something you wanted to ask me?"

She saw him come nearer through the sensation of memory-felt the cold snow fall on her face as the warmth of his body drew nearer. Her heart fluttered wildly as his eyes moved from her eyes to her lips. He leaned closer.

In the moment before their lips met, Emily found herself shaken awake. The bright light of the morning was disorienting in a bedroom that wasn't hers. She looked over to the other side of the the bed and found it empty.

It only took a few moments for Emily to realize that she was in Will's room and that he had gotten up early to go running, but in those moments she felt a sensation she couldn't describe-that she was too afraid to explore.

Instead, she got up and turned the shower on.

...

Will pushed his body harder, reveling in the looseness he felt-the release of chemicals and lightening of spirit. There was always a certain reluctance to go out running, but at the moment he pushed himself the hardest, it always gave him the best feeling in the world.

He didn't hear the dog approaching until it was almost upon him. A distant voice shouted, "Agie!" Will saw a streak of grayish-black as a scruffy dog, leash dragging behind, sped past him.

Will took off after the escaped mutt, closing the gap between them. The dog only sped further away, a look of freedom and joy on his canine face. Realizing this was a game, Will stopped, picked up a stick, and let out a high-pitched whistle.

The dog spied the stick and stopped on a dime, licking his chops. Will wound up and chucked the stick as far as he could. The dog shot off after it, letting out a yip of pure excitement. After retrieving the branch, he obediently brought it back to Will, who tugged it playfully from the mutt's mouth. With an impatient whine, the dog saw back and watched Will and the stick with reverent, expectant eyes. Will bent down instead to grab his collar, and saw that the leash had broken.

"Agamedes!" Said an oddly familiar voice. "I'm so glad you got him-"

Will turned to see Cassandra, decked in her running gear. She seemed equally surprised to see him.

"Oh, hey," Will said, off-guard. "Is this your dog?"

"Yeah," she said, smiling at the dog, who grinned back, tongue lolling. "Yeah, this is Agie. It's my first time taking him out on a run, I think he got a little excited." She showed him the broken part of the leash still in her hand.

"Well, a little training, and he'll run at your side without it," Will said, patting Agie on the head. "He's a good old pup."

"I though so," Cassandra agreed, not knowing what else to say. They stood in awkward silence for several moments. "So, I heard your investigation went well."

"Oh, right, yeah," Will told her. "I have a mark on my license, but they said that was more common than you'd think. Not that anyone wants it, obviously."

"No," Cassandra said, and the silence fell over them again.

There was much that Will wanted to say to her. He still wasn't sure he accepted that they were finished. It was a thing he had been told, not a thing he had agreed to, and despite his current relationship, he still felt strongly for her. Perhaps he was determined to maintain her as a friend.

"I feel like I haven't talked to you for weeks," he said. It was true, they did not often interact at work. "I, um, I miss that."

Cassandra gave him an unreadable look, then shifted her focus to the ground. "Me too."

"Everything is okay with you?" Will asked.

Cassandra nodded. She reached down to pick up Agie's leash. "I should get back to it."

"Cassandra," Will said before she could run off, "I don't want things to be weird between us."

"Why would they be weird?" She asked, turning and running into the wooded path. Will stared after her, unsure if she was being coy or if she truly believed they could be friends.

...

"Interns, meet Harriett Harmon," Dr. Bandari introduced. "Dr. Harmon, meet the interns."

A short, red-headed girl waved at them from Dr. Bandari's side. Emily gave her a friendly smile and wave in return.

Dr. Bandari continued, "Dr. Harmon is helping us while Dr. Barnes takes some personal time. She was also an intern here and survived with flying colors. Please consider her your resident for the time being."

Emily gave Tyra an impressed look as the group turned to begin rounds. "Do you think she was an intern with Micah?"

Tyra raised an eyebrow, as if to question her choice of topic. "Does it matter?"

"No..." Emily said slowly. "Just, you know, curious."

Emily presented the case at hand and Tyra joined her to examine the patient. As they left the room afterwards, Emily couldn't help but say, "I had that dream again."

"You have got to be kidding me," Tyra said harshly. "What are you playing at?"

"No, I've been thinking about what it might mean," Emily said empirically, "And I've come to the conclusion that it's completely natural! It has to do with him ending a friendship, not about dis-satisfaction with Will."

"But...?" Tyra prodded.

"What?" Emily asked innocently.

"You have But face," Tyra insisted. "So, spill."

"I do not have But face..." Emily said defensively.

"Okay," Tyra said, speeding up her pace, "in that case, I'm bored of this."

"No, wait!" Emily called, rushing to catch up. "Okay, there's a tiny, itsy-bitsy But..."

Tyra crossed her arms expectantly, but didn't offer any encouragement.

"When I woke up..." Emily said vaguely, "I felt something."

"I believe that is called Morning Wood," Tyra said, barely fighting a smile.

"Nevermind," Emily backed off. "I should have just let you be bored."

"Ugh, you're so easy sometimes," Tyra scoffed, following after her friend. "Okay, you felt something. What was it?"

"I don't know," Emily said, staring ahead as she walked to the nurse's station. "But I've been feeling really strange. I don't know, maybe I need a vacation."

"Or Vicodin," Tyra teased.

Emily shot her a disapproving look, "that won't be necessary."

...

"Harrie, long time no see," said AJ, coming up alongside his formed co-worker.

She turned and gave him one of her lop-sided smiles. "So the rumors are true," she said. "You did come back from exile."

"Yeah, I think a lot of myself," AJ admitted, "but ME 24/7 was getting to be a bit much."

"See, now I'm confused," Harriet said. "If you're here, then why am I? You could have filled in for Micah."

AJ shot a frustrated look skyward. "Ha, not so much," he said. "I'm not on the best terms...just no. It's complicated," he finished, giving her his most charming smile.

She gave him a sideways glance. "You always did have a talent at complications. Should I ask?"

"Nah," he said with a wave of his hand. "Besides, we have so much else to talk about."

Harriet set down her pen. "Like what?"

"Like..." AJ said thoughtfully, "Dr. Barnes..."

"No, no, that is not a thing I am discussing with you, Aje," Harriet said adamantly. "No way."

"Oh come on," AJ whined. "When I leave, you two are love birds, but when I come back, he won't even mention your name. This is so uncool of you two."

"What can I say," Harriet said with a sly grin, "we're uncool."

"Come on, just a hint," AJ begged. "You realize my imagination is probably making it ten times worse."

Harriet paused to consider. "He really never said anything?"

"Not a peep!" AJ cried. "He's like an iron wall."

"No, just a brick one," Harriet disagreed, biting her lip. She shook her head violently, " It doesn't matter, okay?"

"Then why are you still upset?" AJ asked. Harriet looked flustered. He changed tactics, "Look, I just think that you should stick around until after Dr. Barnes comes back. He could use another woman in his life."

Harriet's ears perked up. Her anger was almost palpable when she asked, "What do you mean?"

"Hey, nothing," AJ sighed, throwing his hands up to display his innocence. "I didn't say anything. It doesn't matter, right?"

...

"It was nice to see you out with Agie this morning," Will said to Cassandra the next morning. "Even if you didn't stop to say hi."

Cassandra didn't look up from what she was doing. "What's the point of going for a run if you stop to talk to every bum you pass?"

"Seriously," Will said with a grin, leaning over the nurse's station to get closer, "now you're calling me a bum?"

Cassandra's lips curled despite her efforts to remain stony-faced, but she quickly corrected herself.

"You know," Will began, leaning in further, "my Grandma-Gam's, to you-she knew a guy named Steve who she called her special friend. Now, when I was old enough to know better, I just assumed that she was seeing him-you know, like they'd had some kind of mythical fling at some point that drew them together for the rest of their lives. Now, when my Grandpa died-"

"Gramps?" Cassandra asked, becoming engaged in Will's stories by way of habit.

"Papa, actually, but close," he said with a satisfied smile. "When he died, we all thought that she would re-marry-that she would want to be with Steve, but it turns out, all they ever were was friends. They had this mythic, powerful, earth-shattering friendship, and they never wanted anything more."

Cassandra stared at him, "You're trying to tell me that we have a mythic friendship?"

"What? No," Will said, pretending to be surprised by her conclusion to his morality tale. "I thought maybe you'd like to meet Steve," Will was glad to see Cassandra's reluctant but radiant smile. He said seriously, "Yes, of course I want us to be friends. I'm sorry for whatever happened between us, I really am, but I'm not willing to just lose you from my life. Just like I'm wasn't willing to lose Emily-"

Cassandra's smile faded abruptly, "But, Will, you're dating her-"

"I doesn't matter," he insisted. "We would be friends in any case."

"Hey, what's up?" Emily asked, depositing her paperwork and smiling confidently at them both.

"Just talking about mythic friendships," Will explained without taking his eyes from his Ex.

"Oh, you told her about Steve?" Emily asked fondly. "Good guy."

Will turned then to give her a broad smile, which she returned. Then she said, "Hey, we're going to be late for the imaging, you ready?"

"Sure thing," Will said with a nod. He turned back to Cassandra, "Think about it?"

...

"AJ," Micah acknowledged, holding the phone to his ear while balancing a box of his mother's things in his other hand. "You haven't burned the place down already, have you?"

"Ha, funny," AJ sniffed. "How's Momma Barnes settling in?"

"Ah, good. You know, strange place and all," Micah said vaguely. He changed the subject, "Hey, you're all set for that transplant tomorrow, right? I made sure to tell the patient not to-"

"Yeah, calm down. We've got this place under control," AJ said with a grin. "I'm not doing the transplant, though, that's Harriet's."

Micah paused. He set the box down, his heart sinking. "Harriet?" He echoed. "You still there, you must be breaking up I thought I heard you say Harriet-"

"Yeah, dumbass, because that's what I said," AJ teased. "Gina got cold feet about working with me, so she made a few calls. I should be upset, but this is becoming more interesting every day."

"No..." Micah murmured, his head buzzing, "I don't see why Bandari would do that. I don't-"

"Dude, hey," AJ said, "what happened between you two?"

Micah plopped into a seat in the clinic's hall. "Nothing, nothing," he said unconvincingly. "How, uh, how long is she gong to be hanging around?"

"Just a few days," AJ answered. "Until you get back. Based on the way you're both so secretive, I imagine your absence is the only reason she decided to come. Hey, you still there?"

"Yeah, sorry," Mich said, realizing that he had stopped breathing. "Look, just make sure she leaves before Saturday, okay? I have to come by to grab some of my mom's things, so it'd be great if-"

"Oh come on!" AJ cried. "Don't you think you two should talk-"

"No! No I don't think that," Micah argued. "Stop trying to set me up for once and help get her moving, okay?"

"Um, right," AJ said unconvincingly through a wave of static, "yeah."

"Hey, okay now you're really breaking up," Micah raised his voice, hoping he could be heard. "Promise me-Damn it!" His connection had failed.

Leaning over his phone, he began to type out an urgent text, but Liz popped her head around the corner.

"Micah!" She snapped, "the doctor's coming, get over here!"

...

Emily glanced at Harriet, across the abdomen of the man they were operating on. It was a routine procedure and the atmosphere was casual, though she felt as hyper-aware as if it were very serious. All the same, it seemed like as good a time as any to get to know the new employee.

"I'm surprised I haven't heard of you," Emily said in a friendly voice, looking over at Harriet.

"Well, why would you have heard of me?" Harriet asked. "It's not like interns are remembered around here."

"No, I suppose not," Emily said, "it's just that Micah...I mean Dr. Barnes would sometimes talk about when he was an intern-"

"Oh, well," Harriet replied, "Dr. Barnes wouldn't have mentioned me."

"Why not?" Emily asked with a chuckle, "Were you his nemesis or something?"

"Oh, no, nothing like that," Harriet replied. "We dated."

Emily stopped in her tracks, uncomfortable, then she remembered that she needed to hold back the man's tissue. "Oh," she managed to say. "Oh, I didn't know."

"Of course not, I just told you," Harriet said. She looked up, brows furrowed. "Hey, you okay? We have to focus here."

Emily jumped, realizing that she had been neglecting her job. "Right! Sorry," she begged. But she couldn't stop herself a moment later, saying, "He just...he never mentioned- So how long are you planning to be here?"

"Just til tomorrow," Harriet said casually. Emily felt relief flood over her, though she couldn't explain it. Harriet continued, "Can't pass up a chance to work with Gina, right?"

Harriet laughed and Emily copied her, not sure what she was laughing at. "Heaven forbid!"

They continued to work in relative silence, but Emily couldn't help steeling glances at Micah's Ex, trying to imagine them together. She didn't know why this bothered her, considering Micah had been dating during the time she had known him. But it did. It did bother her.

...

"Alright, I want daily updates," Micah said, his coat flung over his arm. "Hourly if you think of it. And tell me everything, even if you don't think it's important-"

"We will, we will," Joyce said from her hospital bed, smiling conspiratorially at her daughter. "If you keep telling and re-telling you're going to miss your flight."

"You know, I can reschedule that," Micah said, suddenly very reluctant to leave. "They found someone to fill in for me, so I have the time."

"Micah," Liz said with a theatrical grimace, "we didn't want to say anything, but you're kinda crimping our style. I mean, there are all these baby clothes to pick out, and, let's be honest, you have terrible taste."

"I do not..." Micah complained. He pointed a finger at his sister, "You know, I resent that."

"Liz, you know your brother is sensitive about his taste," Joyce teased. They shared another smile, and despite being the cause of humor, Micah was glad to see his mother these past days acting as though she had a new outlook on life. He wished he felt as good.

"I'll keep my phone on all day," he said once again. "Call me any time-"

"Ugh, get out of here!" Liz cried.

"You're going to miss your flight!" Joyce added.

"Go on, dummy!" Liz encourage, as he turned to leave. "Go be a hero."

"Go win her back!" Joyce called.

Micah turned back, "Mom!"

"Ooh, too soon," Liz cringed.

"I'm sorry," Joyce said quickly, "but take it from me, life is short. Someone takes the things you want, you have to go take them back." She crossed her arms and said in a tough voice, "Besides, noo one walks over a Barnes."

Liz giggled, smoothing her mother's wig fondly, "You're funny on drugs."

Micah frowned, realizing there were topics yet to discuss. "Hey, Liz, can I talk to you for a second?" He asked. When she had joined him in the hallway, he asked, "How much longer are you going to fake this baby thing?"

"I don't know," Liz asked, suddenly serious. "How much longer do you think I can? I mean, I'm eating a ton, so my food baby is growing just fine."

"Liz, this is serious," Micah told her. "She can't find out."

"Calm down, Mouse, she won't," Liz assured. "This is like the one thing I'm really good at."

Micah eyed her, but she seemed confidence. "You're sure you don't want me to stay?"

"Of course I want you to stay," Liz said as though it was obvious. "Don't you kind of feel like you're hiding, though?"

"Micah!" Joyce called. "If you don't stop dawdling, you're going to end up having to leave without saying good-bye."

Micah left his sister with a questioning look and returned to his mother's side. "I'm sorry, Mom," he said, leaning in for a hug. He breathed in the scent of her wig and said, "I'm coming in two weeks, okay?" Now that the real good-bye was upon him, his tears threatened to flow. "I'm counting on you to be here for that. Think you can do that?"

Joyce fought back tears of her own. She gave him a brave smile. "I'll do my best."

Swallowing his reluctance, Micah gave them each on last hug and turned to leave. It was difficult, considering he left his heart with them.

...

"Again I see you and Agie in the morning," Will grinned at Cassandra as he approached the nurse's station the next day. "And again you refuse to say hi."

"Will, I can't do this right now," said Cassandra, having come from a patient who she had informed had three months to live.

"Do what?" Will asked, unaware. "We're talking."

"No, you're talking," she told him. "I'm trying to move on with my life."

"Um, wow, okay," Will's grin fell. He waved his arms around, trying to regain his bearings. "So that's...what, we're just going to become strangers? We work together, Cassandra, we can't just-"

"I know that!" Cassandra shouted. She lowered her voice, but increased her intensity. "I know you're right, but that doesn't make things easier."

"What do you-"

"I get it," she said, gesturing around her. "I'm tired of being told over and over, because I get it. I do. I get that I ruined my chances with you. I see that now," she stated. "And every time I see you, I feel that regret. Because of what I did. It's really hard Will. It would be nice to be friends with you at some point, it really would, but I'm not ready."

...

"So, that doesn't bother you at all?" Tyra asked Emily, looking over at Will and Cassandra in conversation across the hall.

Emily glanced up, then turned back to her paperwork. "No, why would it?"

Tyra raised a questioning eyebrow at her friend's new-found unflappable confidence. "Because their sweet, hot bodies used to grind up against-"

"Okay, okay! 'Why would it' was a bad answer. Too graphic!" Emily cried, holding up a hand. "No, I trust him. Holding him too tight it what caused him to leave Cassandra."

"I thought she broke up with him," Tyra pointed out with a shake of her head.

"Nope," Emily said. Then she self-corrected, "I mean, yes, but no. She forced him to choose between us, which, obviously, he wasn't going to do."

Tyra frowned, looking at Cassandra. "That sounds like a desperate move. I guess her armor isn't as thick as I thought."

"Besides, I get it," Emily admitted, change the subject back. "He doesn't want to lose her friendship."

"And...time!" Tyra called, checking her watch. "Wow, fifteen minutes!"

"What?" Emily cried. "Fifteen minutes what?"

"Since you last talked about Micah," Tyra explained.

"I..." Emily recalled her words, "I wasn't talking about Micah-"

"Yeah," Tyra insisted. "Yeah you were. You were sub-text talking about him."

Emily's confidence deflated somewhat. "Fine, guilty," she admitted. "It's just...it's driving me crazy, the thought that someone might hate me-that HE might hate me."

"Oh, and 30 minutes since the last time you wondered whether or not he hated you," Tyra tapped on her watch again. "I'm going to start a betting pool next time," she grinned at her own cleverness. She sighed upon seeing the look on her friend's face, "I'm only going to say this one more time, and after that you're on your own. He doesn't hate you. He's just hurt because you rejected him."

"I didn't reject him..." Emily whined.

"I think boinking another man is considered a rejection in most societies," Tyra said harshly.

"Okay!" Emily admitted. "I rejected him!"

"So what's the But, But-face?" Tyra asked.

"I just...that dream I've been having...again..." Emily said carefully, "what if that thing that I feel when I wake up-when the bed is empty and I wonder if being with Will was just a dream-what if it's relief?" The moment Emily uttered these words, her hands flew up to her mouth in shock, as though she hadn't realized she had been thinking this.

Tyra craned her neck back in annoyance, because rolling her eyes was too small a gesture. "You have got to be kidding me."

"It's not that," Emily denied immediately. "It can't be. I'm just tired from a long shift and, I don't know, hungry maybe?"

"No," Tyra said, her voice full of attitude. "You're a mess, that's what you are. Take it from someone who knows a lot about messes."

...

Micah was worried when he walked back into Denver Memorial that he would run into Emily before he was mentally ready for it. He could never have prepared to see the red-headed Harriet, bundled in her coat, heading towards him and the doors.

She spotted him at the same time he spotted her, and they stopped in their tracks in the middle of the hospital lobby.

"Harrie," Micah was the first to speak. "I..I thought you'd be gone by now."

"So did I," she replied. "I meant to. But there were complications in surgery, and I didn't think you'd be in until tomorrow anyway..."

Micah took in the sight of her. "Well, you can see yourself out now," he said coldly, altering his path so as to walk past her.

She watched him go, then called out, "Are we going to go on like this forever? How many times do I have to apologize?"

Micah turned to face her reluctantly. "If you're trying to get someone to tell you that things are going to be okay, it won't be me."

"But it's not fair!" Harriet called. "Things were so intense, I could hardly think straight. Looking back...it wasn't me who said those things, Micah, it was the fear."

Mich shook his head. "I see scared people every day, Harrie. They don't do what you did."

"Yes they do!" Harriet took a step towards him. "You know they do! And what's more, the people who love them are willing to forgive the things that were said in a moment of panic. Because that's what people do when they're afraid, Micah, they lash out at the people closest to them."

Micah said nothing, but stared at her solemnly.

"I still think about you all the time," she admitted. "And I told myself that I would leave you alone, like you wanted, but somehow I ended up back here. And seeing you just now, I can feel that this was supposed to happen-that we are supposed to work through this."

"There's only one problem," Micah said. "I'm not interested."

"I don't believe it," Harriet cried. "I don't think you believe it either. If you would just kiss me, I think you'd see-"

Micah, defiant, stepped closer, drawing himself up in front of her. "And when this doesn't change anything, will you leave?"

Harriet raised a hand and placed it on his neck, running her fingers through he hair. "Yes. Kiss me and tell me that you don't feel anything."

He leaned in, closed his eyes, and felt his lips lock up hers. It didn't feel like kissing Harriet, though, it felt like kissing Emily. His eyes still closed, he raised a hand to her waist and pulled her closer. If he thought about it, he missed Emily. He was afraid for his mother. He was lonely.

And then he was done. He was tired-tired of hating this girl from his past who he had tried so hard not to think about. There were too many problems in the present to be so hung up on the past. He pulled away and opened his eyes.

She looked up at him nervously. "So? Anything feel different?"

"Yes, actually," Micah admitted. "We should talk."

"You free?" She asked. Micah nodded, and she asked, "how about a beer?"

He felt himself laugh, "oh lord yes. Take me to that."

...

Walking along the glass walkway, Emily saw Harriet walking towards the entrance in her coat. Just as she was half-way through the lobby, Micah entered, and they paused immediately upon seeing each other.

She could see their lips moving, but couldn't hear a word, yet she stood watching, engrossed.

Micah rushed to pass his Ex, but she held up a hand. He listened as she spoke, his expression darkening. He responded, his head shaking.

Emily felt guilty for spying. This was clearly a very personal conversation. She considered leaving, but then Micah took a step closer and she saw Harriet's hand reach to Micah's neck, where it settled.

The blood pounded in Emily's ears. Micah lowered his head, pained by something Harriet said, but when he looked up, his face was defiant. The space between them grew smaller.

The closeness of the former lovers awakened the memory of a dream-the memory of a cold, snowy night and an unexpected kiss. Emily felt her body tingle as the memory of being so close to him overtook her. As Micah leaned in to kiss Harriet, Emily was almost unaware of the distance between them. She was reminded instead of her dream from that morning, of his warm breath and the gentle kiss of cold snowflakes on her face.

She reached up, as she had, to grab his lapel...but it wasn't there. He was down in the lobby, kissing another woman.

Emily bit her lip and tapped a confused foot, wanting to tear her eyes away, but unable to do so. As she watched, Micah guided Harriet back the way he had come, putting at arm around her back. She continued to watch as they disappeared out the door and into the night.


	17. Chapter 17

Thank you to those who comment (and to those who read, also), it is much appreciated. It saddened me that the show wasn't re-written to reflect it's mid-season cancellation, and it is definitely filling a hole in my soul to finish the story that was left only half-told. Thanks again.

...

Tyra pushed her casual clothes into her locker and gave a cursory grin to Casandra as she came in and went to her own locker.

Cassandra looked over at Tyra a few times while taking off her coat, the asked. "What do you think of this outfit?"

Tyra glanced over, then answered, 'It's hot. Why?"

"No reason," Cassandra said dismissively. She grabbed her scrubs so as the change, then turned back. "I, um, I hate a date after the shift."

Tyra nodded noncommittally. "Congrats."

Cassandra nodded too, going into the changing room. Tyra was re-applying her lip balm, when Cassandra's voice continued. "It's just...he's really...good looking, which of course he would be, but I, um..." she stammered. After a pause, she continued, "I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm talking to you."

Tyra frowned. She didn't know either. She looked around, hoping to see someone else come in.

"I mean, I haven't really talked to you since..." Cassandra began.

There was more silence, Tyra's hand, lip balm inches from her face, hovered uncertainly.

Cassandra came back into the locker room, and folded her clothes carefully. "I just...I don't really have anyone to talk to..." she said, looking somewhat desperate. "Will says he wants to be friends, but what good would that do, right? And Pits...don't get me started with that mess."

Tyra nodded, a disbelieving smile on her face.

"So it's been kind of," Cassandra said searchingly, "I don't know..."

"Lonely?" Tyra suggested mercilessly, chucking her lip balm back into her bag.

"Ugh," Cassandra said with a roll of her eyes. "It sounds so pathetic when you say it out loud."

"Good," Tyra said, checking her small mirror. "Welcome to the life of the rest of us."

Cassandra looked her fellow intern up and down. She asked, "It really looked okay?"

Recalling her outfit, Tyra shrugged, "I'd do you."

Cassandra couldn't hep but smile. "Um, right, thanks." She looked away, biting her lip nervously.

Tyra saw the struggle on Cassandra's face. She may have been a lying, manipulating snake, but she was still a human in there somewhere. Deep, deep down. And she was hurting. "Hey, it's good," Tyra said solidly. "You have nothing to worry about."

Cassandra nodded shyly and struggled to smile, her eyes down.

...

"How about that Mexican place around the corner?" Will asked Emily. "I've been meaning to try it out. Or pizza, if we're too tired...Or the flesh of adorable, endangered baby seals..." Will said, pointing a figure at Emily and used to to guide her eyes back to his face. "See, I knew you weren't listening."

Her attention snapped back to him. "Sorry I..."

Will looked behind him to see what she had stolen her attention, and saw to his consternation that it was Micah in a hushed conversation with Harriet.

Trying to bite back an unsettled feeling of bitterness, he grasped for reasons she might be focusing on Dr. Barnes outside of their prior agreement to date. "Oh, hey," he hit upon an idea, "Dr. Harmon's sticking around for a bit. I hadn't heard."

"I know right," Emily said, looking back to them, her eyes narrowed, "what's up with that?"

He shrugged, trying to shake of his insecurity when she began watching them again. "So, come on," he said loudly, "this is all that will keep me going during the shift. You in for Mexican?"

"Yeah, so in," Emily said, trying to sound casual. "I'm all about the tacos."

"Good, settled," Will smiled. "And about this weekend, I was thinking that new movie. Or maybe a baseball game. You like baseball right? I have those tickets at the end of the season. Or...I could rent a rocketship and we could ride it into the surface of the sun.."

"Yeah, yeah," Emily nodded, her eyes once more on the scene behind him. When his words stopped, she looked up suddenly, "Wait what?"

Will crossed his arms, his sense of humor waning. "What is going on with you? I haven't seen you this distracted since..." Will stopped. He hadn't seen her this distracted since he had started dating Cassandra. A pang of worry shot through him but he pushed it away. There must be a reasonable explanation. "What up with you?"

"Nothing, I just..." Emily said, then she had the decency to look ashamed. "I thought she was leaving. I'm surprised." At Will's unhappy expression, she exclaimed, "For professional reasons! They...they won't ask interns to assist as much if all these alums are coming back and hanging around indefinitely."

"There will always be more surgeries, Emily," Will said, nearly too upset to be sympathetic. "We're pretty frail creatures."

Emily giggle and looked away.

"What?" Will asked.

"No, I just...'frail'," she echoed. "Like someone with abs like yours can be taken seriously using the word frail."

"Oh, I see," Will laughed, "you plan to seek my forgiveness by grandiose flattery."

"Is is working?" Emily inquired.

"It's a start," Will admitted. "Try to keep your head in the game today, okay?"

Emily's beeper went off and she showed him the call from the ER. He nodded, returning her touch of good-bye as she rushed off to answer.

Will stared after her, not quite willing to name the foreboding that he felt. It was some strange fear...he was afraid that he was jealous. He was afraid that he had a reason to be jealous. He was afraid that Emily didn't have her heart in the game.

...

AJ met Micah in the elevator and they rode it down together.

"I heard you were out with Harriet the other night," AJ informed him.

"Where did you hear that?" Micah asked.

"What do you mean, where did I hear that?" AJ scoffed. "I can't speak for the medical field, but as a rumor mill this place is a well-oiled machine. So spill, what happened?"

"Nothing happened," Micah admitted. "It wasn't like that."

"What was it like?" AJ pushed.

"We talked," he answered. "It was long-overdue. But I figured out I was tired of being so angry at her, so we talked."

"Was this before or after you kissed her?" AJ asked bluntly.

Micah gave him a look of shock. "Dude, that is not a thing you would know about!"

"No?" AJ asked, looking proud of himself. "You just told me. So spill."

Micah struggled for words before he was able to say, "It was a dare, okay?" He said defensively. "I kissed her on a dare. It didn't mean anything. In fact, it was like a good-bye."

"A good-bye with lips," AJ nodded, facetious. "Of course, who doesn't do that?"

"Hey, shut it," Micah said, mildly amused. "Things are complicated. Anyway, I'm trying to figure out how to forgive her. Maybe we can, you know, be friends."

"Forgive her?" AJ repeated. "So it was something SHE did? And the plot thickens."

Micah rolled his eyes. "Enough. Please," he begged. "This is not a thing I want spreading around the hospital."

"Spread around..." AJ echoed. He grew serious. "Oh my god. You don't trust me!"

"No, I didn't say that..." Micah defended.

"Yes you did," AJ insisted, hurt. "You refused to tell me, then you said you didn't want it to get around. You don't trust me. You think I'll tell."

"Well, okay, that's what I said," Micah admitted, rubbing at his eyes. "But I didn't mean it like that-"

"Wow," AJ nodded. "And here you think you know a guy." Shaking his head in disgust, he walked out as the elevator door opened.

"I trust you..." Micah called after him.

AJ pointed at his ear, "I can't hear you. You better get the rumor mill to tell me."

...

After several frustrated texts to AJ which remained unanswered, Micah stormed in to prepare for the OR. It didn't help his ill humor that Emily was already there. Shaking his head at his own bad luck, he began to don the appropriate outfit.

"Owens!" Called Harriet familiarly, coming in to join them. She gave Micah a wink.

"Harrie!" Emily echoed awkwardly.

"Barnes," Harriet said, reaching for the soap, "you didn't tell me your interns were so cool."

Inadvertently glancing at Emily, whose eyes had shot to him, he answered, "Sure, some of them are."

Harriet gave Emily an amusingly shocked look. "Well, I got to know Owens here while you were away, she's a good one," Harriet assessed. She looked expectantly at Micah. "She said she'd never heard you talk about me."

Micah wasn't about to take the bait. "Yeah, that's because I didn't."

"Well, I think it's time we do something about that," Harriet said, leading them into the OR where their patient lay unconscious. "Because, unless I was hallucinating the whole time, we got into some crazy trouble."

Micah grinned behind his mask, taking up the scalpel she offered. "No, it was more like YOU got into some crazy trouble and I just happened to be around when it blew up."

Micah made a steady cut and Harriet leaned in with suction. She looked back to Emily. "It wasn't all so bad as he'd have you think. This one time, Owens, we had a hospital-wide wheel chair race. Spoiler alert: the paraplegic won."

Micah motioned for Emily to put pressure. "Do you remember that chant...it was...it had to be..."

"Rollin', rollin', rollin'..." Harriet began singing. "...keep them wheelchairs rollin'..."

"...bandaged up and swollen..." Micah added, cauterize the cut.

"Rawhide!" They both called. "Sew em up, suck em dry, cut em up, make em high...stitch em up, shut it-" Their words grew muddled and uncertain. They laughed together.

"Wait, what was it?" Micah asked, keeping his hands steady despite his laughter.

"No, I can't remember-" Harriet said, taking the tool back.

Noticing that Emily, who laughed along with them awkwardly, had failed to hold the singed tissue back, Harriet did it herself.

"And then, later, with that really large guy..." Harriet followed the memory.

"I know! That was so good," Micah remembered. "He was just like: 'I swear it was there before...'"

Harriet cracked up. "Hey Owens, you got that drip going?"

Emily woke suddenly from her strange distraction. Micah shot a confused look at her.

She continued to laugh uncomfortably. "Yeah, me and some interns helped this dog once," she said, chuckling at herself. "Snuck him out...all hooked up to IVs..."

Micah's smile fell and Harriet corrected her when she brought the drip to the wrong side.

Emily simply continued with her awkward thought, explaining their lack of laughter, "Yeah, I guess you had to be there."

...

"Is anyone sitting here?" Cassandra asked, pointing to the empty seat across from Tyra.

"Nope," Tyra said, motioning for Cassandra to sit. "Emily's in surgery." She let Cassandra unwrap for sandwich and then asked, "So, who's the guy?"

"He's um," she said uncertainly, "he's my dog's vet.'

"Oh, that's right, you got a dog!" Tyra squealed. "You should totally bring him in! Does he have a sexy vet?"

Cassandra gave her a sly look. "Very sexy," she said, warming to the conversation. "He's taking me to this Tapas place..."

"Ooh, Tapas," said Will, his own sandwich in hand. He pulled up a chair and joined them. "Now there's an idea. Who'd you say was taking you?"

"The hot vet," Tyra said, ignoring Cassandra's shaking head.

Will frowned, "Vet, war hero or Vet, animal doctor?"

"Animal Doctor," Cassandra said coldly. "He looks at Agie."

Tyra's pager went off and she shrugged. "Gotta go!"

Cassandra was upset to find herself alone with Will. "You know, I can get another table."

"Why?" He asked. "Emily's in surgery. Anyway, I have a question for you."

"For me?" Cassandra wondered. She looked suspicious, "What is it?"

"Right, um," Will stammered, surprised that she agreed to talk to him. "So Emily's been really distant..."

Cassandra stood abruptly and began packing up her lunch. "Wow, okay, no, you cannot ask me for dating advice. I'm going to find another table."

Will grabbed her arm, but dropped it when he saw the shocked expression this contact created. To his surprise, she sat. "No, okay, look, I know you're the last person who I should talk to about this," he said quickly. "But she won't say anything, and I need someone's advice. I mean, how do I be jealous without being jealous, you know?"

"No, I don't know," Cassandra hissed. "In case you didn't notice, that was kind of a problem with me."

"But what if she-"

"I don't want to talk about it," Cassandra said, trying to stand again.

"Okay. Stay. I'll shut up," he said, motioning for her not to move. He took a bite and chewed in silence for several moments.  
"So, a vet, huh? What, are you tired of real doctors?"

"You know," Cassandra snapped, "you don't have to operate on people's internal organs to be considered a real doctor."

"I was just kidding-" Will began.

"No you weren't, you were being pretentious," Cassandra told him sharply. "Either than or you have the gall to feel jealous of me now, which is not okay. And furthermore, just because you're lecturing people on how not to be jealous doesn't mean you're somehow above it. If you're worried about Emily, then tell her!" Cassandra let her guard drop. Her shoulders fell out of their proud set and she slumped over slightly. "I never thought I'd be saying this, but she really cares about you," she said, looking down. "I hate it, but it's really beautiful, having someone who loves you that much. After seeing the two of you...I want to have that."

Will stared steadily at her with an expression she had never seen before. Cassandra had never felt so vulnerable and exposed. Their gaze locked for several moments in which she felt the universe connect and fuse all around her-all of existence focused in his eyes.

Her beeper went off and she shivered off the strange sensation, suddenly gone. She pushed away her lunch. "I should get this."

Will nodded, not able to speak.

...

"Owens, you seeing anyone?" Harriet asked as they waited for imaging.

"No," Emily answered quickly, then corrected, "yeah! Yeah, his name is Will."

Harriet gave her an appraising look. "Does he live in Canada?"

"What?" Emily asked.

Harriet shook her head, not wanting to explain her joke. "You answered no," she said. "Makes everything after it sound like a cover story."

"No, not at all! That was just, you know," Emily said, pointing to her head, "a brain fart. No, he's an intern here. Dr. Collins."

"Seriously?" Harriet cried. "Sorry, I don't mean to sound surprised. Good on you."

Emily licked her lips uncertainly, remembering the kiss she had seen. "How...how about you?" She asked. "You still seeing Mi-Dr. Barnes?"

"Um, no..." Harriet said, sounding uncertain. "Not exactly. Though I'm pretty sure it's only a matter of time."

"What makes you say that?" Emily asked casually, though she leaned on a sheet of paper that slid and scattered the things around it. She raced awkwardly to pick things up. The imaging tech shook his head disapprovingly.

"Well, don't tell him this," Harriet said, bending down to grab a few things, "but I'm going to stick around for awhile-see if we can get things back to the way they were. It's funny, I've dated since then, but I don't think I've ever quite moved on."

"How...um...how does he feel about that?" Emily asked, trying to set the table back the way she had found it.

"I don't know, but we had a few really great talks..." Harriet said thoughtfully, looking back at the door. "Like I said...I just need time."

"You seem like you were really close," Emily said, hoping the envy was not evident it her voice.

"Oh, the closest!" Harriet said sweetly. "We'd sit out on the roof and just talk for hours. Or, you know, not talk. Plenty of that too," she said with a grin. "But I shouldn't be saying this! He's your resident, I should be taking him more seriously. I can't help it, though, I get all wrapped up in the girl talk."

"Oh, right, it's okay,' Emily said with a wave of her hand, even though it was making her feel ill.

"Hey, how has he been...since I...since the start of the year?" Harriet asked, suddenly very serious.

"Fine," Emily said simply. "He seemed fine."

"Oh, okay," Harriet nodded, then she changed the motion to a shake. "Yeah, why wouldn't he be?"

...

"Your Gallbladder recovering alright?" Micah asked, joining AJ outside his patient's room.

AJ nodded stiffly, focusing on his paperwork.

"Come on, you're still angry?" Micah asked. Shrugging, he dug in his pocket and pulled out a rustling package. "Alright, peace offering. Please accept these Ringdings, purchased with the last of my small bills."

AJ gave him a withering look, but then relented. "That's sweet, dude, but you don't get this body by pigging out on Ringdings."

Micah looked askance at him and stuffed a Ringding in his own mouth. AJ laughed. Micah swallowed his bite and stepped closer. "Tell me about you and Dr. Bandari," he said.

"What?" AJ laughed. "I don't know what you think you saw in the bar..."

"You want to know about Harriet and me?" Micah said, "Then tell me about you and Dr. Bandari."

AJ looked around the empty hall, and made a face. Micah knew his friend's curiosity outweighed his sense. "Okay. Deal. It was a couple weeks before I left. I mean, it was before then too-the looks, the smiles, the touches-" he smiled rakishly at the memory, "but the...the night...was amazing. She claimed afterwards that it was a mistake, but trust me, action that hot is never a mistake."

"This is beginning to make me uncomfortable," Micah said, only half kidding.

AJ rolled his eyes. "Look, it was just the one time," he said. "But it, you know, it went to my head a little bit. An ego trip. And then when she rejected my advances after that, I lost it a little bit."

"A little bit?" Micah cried. "We could hear you on different floors of the hospital!"

"Alright, I lost it, okay?" AJ hissed. "Gina and I...we have fire. You can't just deny that."

Micah held up his hands, begging his friend to stop. There was no rule against an intern dating the Attending, though it certainly seemed taboo. "Okay. More than I wanted to know," Micah said, "but thank you for finally being honest."

AJ nodded, seeming somehow proud of himself now that he had shared. "And now you. Did she cheat on you?"

"No. No, that's a little simpler..." Micah said, gritting his teeth. "Harrie, uh, she thought she was pregnant."

"Jesus, why didn't you tell me?" AJ shouted, then looked around to make sure no one had heard.

"Well, you were gone," Micah explained. "Besides, she wasn't, it was a false positive. But before we knew that...she told me..." Micah couldn't believe that he was about to say this out loud, "...she told me that she would get rid of it-that she didn't want to have a baby with me..."

AJ narrowed his eyes, confused. "Well, come on, you guys were young-not making any money-"

"No, you're not hearing me," Micah said slowly. "She didn't say that she didn't want to have a baby, she said she didn't want to have a baby WITH ME. As in, if she had been in a relationship with someone else she would have gone through with it."

AJ grew silent and solemn as this sunk in. "Jesus."

"Now, I'm not saying that I was ready to be a father," Micah clarified quickly, "but not WITH ME?"

"Dude, that's rough," AJ said. "I'm so sorry."

"Yeah well, I broke up with her after that," Micah continued. "I mean, I loved her and she didn't feel the same way. What else was I supposed to do?"

"No...I get it," AJ said, holding his hands up. "I get it, bro."

"So, there it is," Micah finished awkwardly. "Don't tell anyone, alright?"

"No. No of course not."

...

Will peered around the corner and saw Emily in the observation room. It was, almost literally, the last place he had looked for her. "There you are! I've been looking..." He began. Nearer, however, he saw that she was watching Micah make a slow, steady cut on a patient. He felt his blood boil. Cassandra was right, just because some jealousy was unfounded didn't mean it all was. "Emily, we need to-"

"I know," Emily said sadly, watching Micah operate. "It's time for The Talk."

Will glanced at his Resident through the glass and Micah looked back. Seeing them together, he shook his head and turned his back.

"Did you ever feel like..." Emily began, "other people pushed us together? You said that Cassandra told you that you had chosen me, but weren't you really saying that Cassandra chose me? I mean, you didn't. She broke up with you."

Will could hardly believe what he was hearing. "Emily, I-"

"And I was so worried about these complications with Micah," Emily continued. "I thought my way out of something that I wanted and I escaped into what was easy-something familiar."

"I hardly think-" Will began.

"And you!" Emily interrupted, "You felt pressure because Micah had set a deadline. And you were pushed to do something before you were ready. Before you'd really thought it through."

"I thought it through," Will answered. "Do I get to speak now?"

"Just...just one more thing," Emily said, holding up a finger. "I thought you were everything I always wanted. When I looked down the path of my future, all I could see was you. But what if, without my knowing, my path curved and suddenly it wasn't you at the end? What if suddenly everything I wanted was just that, what I WANTED, instead of what I WANT? I feel like, ever since that night in the bar, I've been living in the past tense."

Will didn't even try to answer. He couldn't form a thought.

"I was afraid. Like you were. I was afraid to see my life moving in a scary new direction," Emily explained. "And I clung to you, because that's what I do. But, Will, I don't feel that way about you. My love for you...it's as your friend."

Will blinked rapidly as tears threatened. "I don't...I don't know what to say to that."

"You don't have to say anything."

He sniffed. "Well, um, I think I'm going to head out," Will said. "You should...stay at your place tonight, I think."

Emily nodded, her expression sad.

Will walked out-out of the OR, out of the hospital, and out into the blissfully cool night. He breathed rapidly, hoping the fresh air would loose the band that had tightened around his heart.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Cassandra, legs bare in a purple dress, walk up to an attractive man in his car. For the hundredth time that day, he felt the sharp stab of jealousy. He was sick of it.

Turning towards his car, he got in, slammed the door, and sped off.

...

Micah nodded at his intern to finish sewing up their patient and turned to see that Emily was still outside, watching. Knowing that she had been watching had annoyed him during the entire procedure, especially when her inexplicable decision to butt into his life had meant that he had been forced to watch, out of the corner of his eye, the interaction with her knew boyfriend.

He didn't know what she was playing at, but after a day of fumbling with papers and forgetting her job in the OR, he was upset that she couldn't keep herself together. It was unfair that she wait after him like this, expecting his former fondness of her to make up for shoddy work.

Deciding to tell her off immediately, Micah tugged off his gloves and rushed through the door. "Hey, what are you playing at?" He asked harshly.

"What?" She cried softly, not expecting him.

"You sit and watch, and then you have some intimate meeting with your boyfriend?" Micah yelled. "It's incredibly distracting!"

"No," Emily shook her head, trying to explain. "I didn't tell him to come here, but he wanted to talk."

"If you can't keep your love life out of your work," Micah scolded, "then you have no place in or near the OR."

"Hey! That's not fair," Emily answered in her defense. "We were just talking. In fact-"

"When your talking gets in the way of a patient's health, it becomes unacceptable," Micah shouted.

"I don't see how you can say that," Emily raised her voice also, "considering the fact that I saw you and your girlfriend yucking it up over the patient after her was cut wide open-"

"We were not yucking-" Micah argued. "And she's not my-"

"I saw you kiss her!" Emily said. She looked shocked at her outburst. After a moment of silence, she continued, "I don't know how to..."

Micah tried to feel sympathy for her, but he couldn't find it in himself. "Well, the time and place to feel insecure about that is not at work in the OR."

"How can you say that?" Emily cried. "I'm trying to tell you that what I saw upset me-"

"Well, in case you forgot already," Micah said coldly, "I too walked in on a person I card about kissing someone else, so excuse me if I'm a little short on pity-"

"I don't want pity!" Emily whined, "I want-"

"I don't care what you want!" Micah yelled. "I'll tell you what I want-to get out of this gown, which has someone else's blood on it. That is the extent of what I want. Now, excuse me."

"Micah!" Emily called to his retreating back.

He cringed at how familiar his name sounded coming from her mouth. "It's Dr.-

Her good humor flagged. "Right. Dr. Barnes."

Something in her antagonistic tone made him turn back. "You know, believe it or not, Dr. Owens, I am trying to have a professional discussion with you," he shouted. "Harrie and I were talking, yes, but it never affected the procedure. You, on the other hand, were distracted and negligent and had to be reminded several times of your job. Whatever drama in your life is irrelevant. If you behave this way again, I will have to recommend that you be taken out of active rotation before you cause harm to a patient!"

...

Emily was shaken. She started back at Micah with a desperate, unbelieving look. Had he just said she wasn't fit to be a surgeon? Remembering her failure to assist earlier, she felt the immense fear that he was right. She failed as a surgeon, she failed at love, she failed at life.

Not wanting him to see her cry, Emily rushed past him and quickly collected her things. Defeated and mortified, she hurried blindly to her car. She fumbles with the keys, and let out a loud sob, letting herself cry for several moments before starting the ignition.

Sniffling and wiping at her eyes, Emily turned her wipers on as it began to rain.

The road became difficult to see, and without warning, turning on a tight bend in the road, two bright headlights were directly in front of her. She pulled at the wheel and swerved, but the oncoming car had lost control. At the moment of impact, she lost consciousness.


	18. Chapter 18

Episode 18

"You've never had lobster? Seriously?" Jessie asked, incredulous, as Cassandra searched the restaurant's menu.

"No, my mom had an allergy to shellfish," she explained. "She never let me try it!"

"Okay, but you're an adult, right? You could have had it after that," Jessie pushed. "Or do still live with your mom?"

"Alright wise ass, no," Cassandra said with a tight smile, trying to stay in good humor. "But getting through medical school is expensive, so..."

'Which I wouldn't know, right," Jessie asked, "because I'm not a real doctor?"

Cassandra didn't know if he was serious, but she decided to laugh, "you are never going to let me live that down, are you?"

Jessie grinned at her. He was kidding. He motioned for a server to come by, "We shall have TWO lobsters," he ordered, "and a bottle of your favorite red wine." He winked at her, and then finished, "Oh, and the Tartare to start."

"Very good," nodded the server.

Cassandra was not used to having other people order for her, but she held back her annoyance. It was probably his way of being protective, she hoped-a sign that she was in the presence of an alpha male. Heaven knew that she had been around push-overs long enough.

"So," said Jessie, covering his bread with a respectable serving of butter, "how's Agie doing these days?"

"Good! Good, I try to give him a good run every morning so he's tired while I'm away," Cassandra said fondly.

"That must be exhausting!" Jessie exclaimed. "I was never much of a runner. Not that...not that running is bad or anything!"

"No, it's fine," Cassandra said, realizing her face had twisted into a frown. "I have a lot of aggression to run off, actually. Bad memories."

"Like what?" Jessie asked.

"Mmm..." Cassandra said with a shake of her head. "I thought you were a vet, not a shrink."

"Doesn't mean I can't listen," he replied.

Cassandra considered. Perhaps it would be nice to get things off her chest. "Oh, wow, well.." she began. From her purse came the sound of her phone ringing. Instinctively, she reached for it.

"You know it's considered polite to turn those off," Jessie teased. Or was he teasing? It was impossible to tell.

"I know, I forgot about it," Cassandra struggled to turn it off. She saw that it was a call from Bandari. Did Bandari even have her number? "It's my boss," she said, confused. "I have to take this."

He gave her a disbelieving look, spreading his arms in frustration.

"How far out are you?" Bandari asked abruptly, the sound of a busy hospital behind her.

"Um, like, twenty minutes, why?" Cassandra asked.

She listened carefully, her eyes on her date. She saw his frustration grow as her expression changed from confusion to fear. She hung up, standing immediately to leave. "Um, I'm so sorry, I have to go."

"Was that your safety call?" Jessie asked. He berated himself, "I shouldn't have pushed the lobster."

"No, no, everything's fine," Cassandra told him. "There's been a car crash."

...

"But you said that you felt differently...you know after," Harriet said to Micah's back as he walked down the hall.

"I never said it was differently about us," he called back to her.

"But micah, come on," she stopped him. "We were great together."

"Yeah, until we weren't," Micah reminded her. He took off down the hall again. "I just...I don't see how to come back from that."

"Well, we could at least try," Harriet argued. She stopped in her tracks and stamped her foot. "Ugh, you're so hard-headed, Barnes. Would it kill you to go get dinner with me?"

"Kill me?" Micah asked, stopping several feet from her. "No, but-"

Before he could answer, Dr. Bandari rushed past them, shouting. "All hands on deck! Move it."

"Is something wrong?" Micah asked, jogging to catch up with her.

"There's been a collision," Bandari replied. "One dead on impact, the other's one of ours."

"What?" Micah yelled. "Who is it?"

Bandari didn't answer. She pushed her way through the doors outside of which an Ambulance pulled to a stop. The back door burst open and a gurney pushed out. On it, covered in blood, was Emily Owens.

Micah turned away, frightened tears stinging his eyes. He felt he might be sick.

The EMTs raced with them into the hospital, explaining the damage, but Micah could barely hear. It sounded like nonsense, anyway, his doctor's brain had shut off.

"Dr. Barnes," Bandari commanded as the EMTs left, "meet me in the OR-"

"No, no I can't!" Micah cried, his eyes wide. He hadn't even heard what was wrong with her...how could he operate?

"Excuse me?" Bandari asked, coming to a stop.

He blinked rapidly, staring at her like a frightened child. "Please," he begged. "Please, I can't do that."

Bandari stared him down, her gaze so intense that she may have been reading his mind. She turned to Harriet, who was by her side, "Where is Dr. Steigler?"

"In a triple bi-pass-" Harriet began.

"Damn it," Bandari cursed, "and the interns?"

"Only two on shift," she replied.

"Who are they?"

"Dr. Yules and Dr. Brenner," Harriet said.

"No, that's not good enough," Dr. Bandari said. She thought for a fraction of a second and then pulled out her phone. "Dr. Kopelson," she barked when the other line picked up, "how far out are you? Get back here immediately." Micah's heart raced as she listened, the she shouted, "You have fifteen minutes...Well, I don't want to hear excuses, I want you here and handing me a scalpel by the time the patient is prepped. Dr. Owens has been in a car accident." She hung up and rushed with Harriet after the gurney.

...

Cassandra didn't know how she had managed it, but when Bandari stuck her hand out for the scalpel, she was there to offer it.

Surgery had begun immediately to stop the internal bleeding. Cassandra tried not to think that the body below her was Emily's.

Then her blood pressure dropped, and the room became very serious. Nurses called out her vitals, Surgeons barked out their orders, pouches of blood were brought in and pumped into the prone body.

Then Cassandra realized...this was Emily. She couldn't explain it, but this knowledge instilled in her a primal sense of courage that she had never felt before. No matter how nice her other patients seemed, she didn't know them. Their lives had not impacted hers. Emily, on the other hand, was known. This was the reason that doctors were discouraged from operating on loved ones-so that emotions wouldn't get it the way...but to Cassandra, suddenly everything clicked. If she didn't act, this person that she knew would suddenly disappear from her life.

The fighting and the competition ceased to matter. She would not let Emily die.

Bandari called for assistance and Cassandra rose to the challenge, the hesitation of so many other instances gone from her limbs. Taking a deep, steadying breath, she leaned over the exposed, punctured organs and tissues and began the slow, meticulous process of making them right again.

...

Will rushed into waiting room to find Micah already there, rocking back and forth, his nails between his teeth. Micah looked up to see his erstwhile rival with reluctance, but a new wave of fear washed over him and he let it go. Emily turning him down-Emily being in love with another man-none of it would matter if she died. This was no time to hold grudges.

"They told me to come here," Will said in greeting. "Have you heard anything?"

Micah was then overwhelmed with shame. He felt like a coward, hiding there while Emily was in surgery. He had never backed down in an emergency before, and it killed him that this all-important disaster had changed this. Trying for the hundredth time to quash these feelings, he nodded, moving his hands to his knees, but continuing to rock. "Three broken ribs, crushed trachea, punctured liver...to begin. She's been in there for," he looked at his watch, "five hours now." Micah rubbed forcefully at his eyes.

Will collapsed onto the couch, closing his eyes and sighing loudly.

Micah went back to biting his nails, then realized what he was doing and forced his hand down. "It's my fault," Micah confessed, looking ahead. He couldn't help the audience: he had to say something. "I yelled at her and she took off...and then she got hit."

Will rubbed his forehead. "No, it's my fault," he said. "She wanted to talk to me and I didn't want to hear it. I just left her there. If I had-"

"You didn't yell at her!" Micah argued.

"Yeah," Will said competitively, "kinda did."

"But you didn't-" Micah continued.

"Are we seriously fighting about who should be blamed for this?" Will said loudly, cutting off the battle for pity.

"...no," Micah admitted, snapping out of it. He brought his nails back to his mouth and chewed nervously for several minutes-until he couldn't stand it any more. "I just..I told her she was a bad doctor. That's what I said. I mean, she had a bad day at work and I just jumped down her throat-"

"She knew you didn't mean it," Will said sympathetically.

"Did she? Then why do I feel like this?" Micah cried, standing up quickly. He paced restlessly back and forth, then, almost unaware of his actions, punched at the wall. His fist hit against it with a sickening thunk and he cursing, shaking it off. He continued pacing, "And what if-"

"Whoa," Will said, scrutinizing his boss, "are you bleeding?"

Micah looked at his knuckles and cursed again. "It's fine, I'll just..." He moved towards the first aid kit.

Will stood up and stopped him, "Please, let me." He grabbing the box, but Micah held on reluctantly. Will continued, "Relax, man, I'm a doctor."

"I don't know what to do," Micah said, letting go of the box and staying still while Will clean his self-inflicted wounds. "I can't stand waiting like this."

Will kept his eyes on his work. "I'll tell you what you shouldn't do," he said sagely, "punch walls."

Micah nodded. He looked around the room, then back at Will, a realization dawning on him. "Oh god...I didn't...Someone should call her mom...Her number's in the records, right?"

Will stopped him with a gesture. "I got it," he said, taking out his phone. He set down the disinfectant. "You can finish up here."

Micah took it, watching Will reach for his phone. It hurt once again that Will could do this, when he could not.

...

"Judy?" Will said into the phone when the ringing abruptly ceased. "Hi, Judy? Can you hear me?" A voice answered that she could. "Oh Hi, yeah, it's Will Collins..." the voice jabbered, and he played along, "I know, she said you were happy about it. Look, I don't want to scare you, but, um...there's been an accident." The voice grew solemn, Will answered, "No, Emily was driving, she's in surgery-" This was as far as he could get. Judy's voice took off in a loud squawking, and then the line went silent. "I, hello? Judy?"

As Will gave up on the call and hung up, he was approached by a very tired looking Harriet. "Hey," she said, removing her cap. "I bear good news. She's stable. Everything looks good."

"Oh, thank god," Will said, feeling relief rush over him.

"There's a danger of swelling," Harriet said before he could become too complacent, "so she's not out of the woods yet, but the worst is over. Your girlfriend is a fighter."

"Oh, she's not my girlfriend," Will said, not sure why he felt it necessary to say this, "but I'm still really glad to hear that."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Harriet apologized. "She said you were dating."

"Just now?" Will asked, wondering if she was awake.

"No, no, when we were talking awhile back," Harriet corrected, "You know, I thought she might have been pulling my leg. I mean, look at you! Shoot, I didn't mean...she seems like a sweet girl and everything..."

"No, we...we were dating," Will explained. "She broke up with me."

"What? Why?" Harriet exclaimed. She corrected her volume, "Sorry, that's so personal and I'm being insensitive..."

"No, it's okay," Will waved away her guilt. He looked back in the break room at Micah, who still chewed at his nails nervously. "She was right," he admitted. Will turned back to Harriet, "And you know what, if she wants to be with Micah, I'm happy for her. He really cares about her."

Harriet cocked her heda and repeated, "...with Micah?"

"Yeah, yeah, he asked out and she was going to say yes," Will explained breezily, "but I don't know, I got it in my head that...it doesn't matter. Almost losing her like that...I just want her to be happy."

Harriet's gaze had not moved from Micah's nervous form in the other room. She looked confused.

"I should go tell him," Will said, not sure what new mess he had managed to step in.

...

Micah nervously paced back and forth across Emily's hospital room until he could no longer stand it. He dropped his body into the chair like a bag of bricks, looked often at Emily's unconscious body. He had stopped looking at his watch hours ago, though the sky outside her small window showed that much of the day had passed. He looked back at her and felt another wave of guilt overtake him.

Will's words had been kind, but it hadn't assuaged his feeling of culpability. Maybe a few months ago he would have believed the person who said that, despite a few harsh words, she knew how much he really cared...but that was before. He had been cold to her-mean even. And then in her moment of greatest need he had abandoned her.

Micah heard a manic tapping noise and realized that it was his own anxious feet. He stood up and started pacing again.

There was a small sound from Emily's bed, and Micah turned to her. Her eye's opened to a squint. He rushed to her side.

"Oh, thank god!" He cried, grabbing her hand.

Emily's eyes opened a little wider. She gave him a distant but pleasant look. "Hey!" She breathed softly. "Micah Mouse. What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to be here when you woke up," Micah said quietly, his heart swelling. "Do you remember what happened?"

Emily looked towards the window, her vision unfocused. "Yeah..." she said slowly, "yelling...and lights..."

"Don't try too hard, okay?" Micah instructed when he saw her brown furrow in thought. "They gave you some pretty intense painkillers. You...um...you were in a car accident."

Emily nodded once, calmly examining the cords, tubes, and sensors that were hooked to her. "Everything's so fuzzy."

Micah lifted his other hand and placed it on hers, which got her attention. He couldn't bear his guilt a moment longer. "Emily...I am so sorry. Not just for what I said, which was awful, but for how cold I've been. You're allowed to date anyone you want, and I feel so honored to have you as a friend. I had no right to treat you that way."

"No, Micah," Emily said sweetly, though still distant, "you were right. And last night...you were right."

"No," he argued, "I was way out of line."

"I was distracted," Emily told him. "I just...I can't stand to see you with Harriet."

"But I-" Micah stopped. Had he heard her correctly? "What?"

"I can't stop thinking about you," Emily said vaguely. "And I can tell you this now, cause I'm pretty sure I'm dreaming," she began to tear up: "I'm afraid to not have you around."

Micah squeezed her hand, "I'm right here, I promise."

Then his beeper went off. Looking at the time, he realized that his shift had started half an hour ago. He considered not answering it.

"Emily, I-" Micah started.

"You have to go," Emily said sweetly.

Micah shook his head. "I don't want to."

"You have to," Emily insisted. "If Bandari finds you, you'll have your own room in the ICU."

Micah smiled, nodding reluctantly. With a final squeeze of her hand, he rushed off.

...

"I heard you did the surgery," Will said, walking up to Cassandra. "That must have been something..."

"Yep," Cassandra answered vaguely.

Will waited for further response, but there was none. "Just...yep, that's all?"

"What do you want to hear?" Cassandra asked. "I kicked ass at it. That's all."

"Um, okay," Will replied, disappointed. He wondered at what upset him, and then he looked anew at his Ex. "You know, you look different."

"I got a haircut," Cassandra said coldly, "don't tell me you've only just noticed."

"It isn't the hair. It's you," Will said thoughtfully. "You, I don't know, you seem taller."

"Might be the heals-" Cassandra said, turning to walk away.

Will followed, suddenly unable to let it go. "Something happened to you tonight. What was it?"

Cassandra stopped, trying to read his expression. "You really want to know?"

"Was it...Emily?" Will asked, wanting to hear about the surgery.

"I think it was," Cassandra said freely. "Having her there, losing blood...it was so scary."

Will shook his head. "I don't think I could have done it."

"But that's what I realized," Cassandra said with a level of conviction he had never before heard from her, "of course I could do it."

Will remembered how betrayed she had felt by her own hands when they had shaken earlier that year. He asked, "Because with her it was different?"

"No," Cassandra replied. "Because with her it was what it should have been this whole time."

Will stared back at her unblinking eyes, not understanding. "I..." he stammered, "I don't..."

"I've been so focused on being perfect-on being number one," Cassandra explained, her eyes full of pain. "And when other people did better than me at something, I began to doubt everything. I forgot about just being."

"Just being?" Will asked.

"Yes," Cassandra said carefully, coming to her point at last: "just being that thing that stands between life and death."

"You've always been that-"

"No I haven't!" Cassandra cried. "Will, I should feel grateful every day that I get to be what I am, but I haven't felt that way. Instead, I've been looking at every patient-every single patient-thinking, what can they do for me? How can their situation advance mine?" Cassandra gasped for air, looking back at Will with teary eyes, "I'm the worst doctor ever..."

Will lunged towards her, wrapping her trembling body in his arms. "That's not even possible," he said soothingly. "It's easy to get caught up in competition. Here you are studying under your hero. Of course you want a world-reknowned heart surgeon to think well of you."

"But she doesn't like me," Cassandra said. "I think she likes you...and she likes Emily..."

"I think it's a stretch to say she LIKES anyone, but that you know," Will said smoothly. "What can I say, the charm goes a long way."

"You do think you're charming, don't you?" Cassandra teased, grinning despite herself.

Will smiled back, feeling a strange glow. "Hey, you did good tonight."

"Thanks," Cassandra said, fully genuine. "I feel pretty good about it."

"I feel..." Will said, looking at her thoughtfully. What did he feel? Kinda like he had at the beginning of the year, before things had gotten so complicated. He shook his head, "Nevermind..."

"What?" Cassandra prodded.

Will struggled to collect his thoughts. "No, I..." he stammered, "I was going to say that I'm really proud of you...but I shouldn't use the word proud, because that implies that I had something to do with it-"

"Thank you," Cassandra said quickly. "I want you to be proud of me."

"Well, I am," Will said. "And of course I noticed your hair, give me some credit."

Cassandra looked down with a satisfied smile and Will smiled back. They were too shy to say anything more.

...

"Did you know?" Harriet asked, hurrying up to match AJ's pace.

He held his arms wide, "I know a lot of things, sweetheart, which one are you referring to?"

Harriet punched him weakly in the ribs and he hunched in to guard himself against a repeat attack. "Ouch, what? Did I know what?"

"That Dr. Owens wants to be with Micah?" Harriet demanded.

"No, no," AJ shook his head seriously. "Wanted. Past tense. And even then, not so much."

"Really, then why did she break up with Captain America?" Harriet demanded, hands on her hips." I'm sorry, but a girl would not give up those abs unless she had a damn good reason."

AJ gave her a critical look. "Why? You worried?"

"Why would I be.." Harriet looked at him and saw recognition in his eyes. "Oh my god, he told you!"

"Yeah," AJ said, waving to a patient as they passes. "And by the way, you suck."

"No, see, it's more complicated than that-" Harriet said defensively.

"I'm sure it is," AJ said in dismissal. "But if barbie broke up with Ken, I'd advise you to stay out of the way. Those two are destined. You'd just get hurt."

"Oh hell no," Harriet shot him down. "I am this close to making things right with him. I'm not backing off now. I need your help, though."

"Whoa, hold on," AJ stopped, a disbelieving smile playing upon his lips, "I find out that you broke my boy's heart, and you think I'll help you win him back? Are you insane?"

"Aje, come on," Harriet whined. "You know me."

"Correction," AJ replied, beginning his brisk pace again. "I thought I did."

Harriet tried to reply, but AJ motioned that he was about to enter a patient's room, and she was left outside it, confused.

...

Will knocked gently on Emily's door. She looked a him with a sad grin.

"Hey, I heard you'd woken up," he said, coming in to join her.

"Yeah. Yeah, hey," Emily said, looking like she had something to say. "I'm glad you came by."

"Me too," Will said with a serious nod. "How you doing?"

"Not too bad, actually," Emily teased. "These pain killers are great."

"I, um...I just wanted to, you know, apologize," Will said, gesticulating awkwardly. "For what I said."

"Will, you didn't really say anything," Emily reminded him.

"No, I know...but," Will stammered, "I don't know, maybe I should have. Said more, I mean. It was hard to hear...what you were saying...but I just left you there, and then you..." Will stopped talking. He took off his glasses and pinched at eyes.

"Please don't!" Emily cried. "I don't blame you. I don't blame anyone. It was a rainy night and the other driver skidded out of control. It could have happened to anyone-"

"But it happened to you!" Will said, voice raised. "Emily I...about what you said..."

"Right...I didn't even think about how I might upset you," Emily cut in. "That was really thoughtless of me. I just...I had to tell someone, and you were always my beat friend-"

"No, it's not that..." Will replied. He grew quiet. "Emily, I'm breaking up with you."

Emily's eyes grew wide. "Okay, but I thought I-"

"No, hear me out," Will said, "Cassandra...she dumped me. And you're right, I let her goad me into making choices that I wouldn't have made otherwise." Then he re-though his words, "Not that you aren't awesome...and I think we had a good time..." He grinned sheepishly.

"Will..." Emily begged, blushing.

"What I'm trying to say is," Will pushed on, "I've let myself be pushed around by both of you. I've let your rivalry effect my decisions. And in order to relinquish my role as pawn between nemeses, I have to be the one who ends this." He took her hand, "So...Emily-my dear and long-time friend-I'm breaking up with you."

Emily nodded, willing to take one for her friend. "I don't know how I'll survive," she told him in jest.

Will smiled. "Thank you, that's just the right kind of rhetoric I need," he said. Carefully, he leaned down to give her a hug. "I love you too. As a friend. I want you to be happy."

"You know what would make me really happy?" Emily grabbed onto this.

"What?" Will asked. "Name it."

"A pint of chocolate ice cream..." Emily answered hopefully.

"A pint?" Will asked, looking around. "You know they don't have freezers in this room."

Emily shook her head with an impish grin, "Don't need one."

"You're seriously going to eat it all at once?"

"Will, come on, I was just dumped!" Emily cried. Then she smiled again, "That's what people tell me anyway."

"Shut up, will you?" Will asked, teasing. "People re-write history all the time."

"But the ice cream?" Emily reminded.

Will bowed theatrically at the door, "It's the least I can do."

...

"So...you and Dr. Owens, huh?" Harriet said, joining Micah at the nurse's station. "How did I not see that?"

"Trust me," He replied, "you wouldn't be the first."

Harriet stared at him for several moments as he wrote in his untidy scrawl. He seemed strangely unfamiliar to her, though she had known him so well. "You never had any intention of getting back together with me, did you?" She asked.

Micah looked up, "Harrie-"

"I'm going to stop you right there," Harriet said, holding up a hand. "No sentence that begins with my name said in that tone of voice is one that I want to here. Just answer my question."

Micah looked around for an excuse to exit the conversation, but found none. "No," he told her. "Even without Emily, I didn't."

Harriet laughed, distraught. "Well, to be fair, you were pretty clear about it," she said, wanting to see his reaction to her giving up. "I guess I heard what I wanted to hear. I just...I really thought it was our time."

"Harriet, we had our time," Micah said, not giving her the answer she wanted. "It was great, but..."

"I know. I blew it!" She exclaimed, choosing a different tactic. "And, instead of going back to change the ending, I guess I need to just...learn to live with it."

"You could try forgiving yourself," he suggested, handing his paperwork to the nurse. "I have."

This was the first Harriet had heard of this. Perhaps this was what she was looking for, because she felt her heart kindle with hope. "Really? Why? It was awful."

"Harrie-" Micah started.

"No, it was. I was," she said, feeling close to him through the truth of it. "I can't even imagine someone doing that to me."

"Yeah, well, I don't recommend it." Micah told her, cringing. "Kinda sucked."

"Sucked, huh?" She asked with a sly grin.

"It sucked balls," Micah corrected himself. "Are you kidding me? I couldn't get out of bed for a month-"

"Okay. Okay!" Harriet begged off. "I get it. Guilt."

Micah looked at her squarely, reaching for her hand. His touch made her heart flutter, but his words were unwelcoming. "I want you to move on," he said. "I want you to be happy. What you said...it was honest, and maybe it was hard to hear, but it was for the best. We weren't meant to be together."

Harriet bit back her rebuttal, not convinced.

...

"Hey, Raul," Will greeted as he walked back into the hospital, ice cream in a bag at his side. He eyed the flowers carried by the deliver man.

"Hello, Doctor," Raul nodded. "I heard about Dr. Owens. It is very sad."

"She got really lucky," Will said. "We're all confident she'll make a full recovery."

Raul looked at the flowers he carried, "Well, hopefully these will help."

"Oh, those are for Dr. Owens?" Will asked. "You know, I'm going there anyway. I can save you the trip if you want."

"Are you sure?" Raul asked reaching for his clipboard. "You wouldn't mind? We're running a little behind today, my brother called in sick..."

Will waved a hand, "Yeah, it's not a problem." He signed his name on the clipboard and took possession of the bouquet. He nodded a good-bye to Raul as he got in the elevator. When the doors opened, flowers impeding his vision, he nearly ran into Cassandra.

She took in his delivery and rolled her eyes. Will stopped abruptly and the ice cream's bag swung out to touch her. She recoiled at the coldness. "What do have in there, a block of ice?"

"Just some Roco-Choco," Will explained eagerly. "Emily's last request."

Cassandra blanched. "She's dying?"

"What? No!" Will stammered. "Her last request of me as a boyfriend. I broke up with her," he said, trying to sound casual but also gauge Cassandra's reaction. He snapped his fingers and added, "Or, ooh, better-it's her FIRST request of me as a friend."

Cassandra surveyed the bouquet again warily turning to leave, "Yeah, those are friendly flowers."

"These, no, I'm just helping," Will explained, regretting his offer to help. "They're not from me," he said, searching for a way to pull this conversation back. "Here, there's a card. 'All our love, Joyce'. I don't know who that-oh, it's Micah's mom. That's sweet."

Cassandra nodded that she heard, but continued to walk away.

"Cassandra!" Will called, setting down the flowers and ice cream. Before he knew what he was doing, he blurted, "Don't date that vet."

This caught Cassandra's attention. "Why not?"

"Because..." Will said, realizing what he was going to say only as he said it, "I don't think you should move on."

"How can you say that?" Cassandra demanded, turning on him. "You moved on within days!"

"No, I didn't!" Will insisted. "I thought I had, but...I was still just following what you told me to do."

Cassandra crossed her arms, unamused, "You slept with Emily because I told you to?"

"Kind of. Not if you say it like that, but..." Will struggled. He took a breath to gather himself. "You told me I chose her. It got in my head. I was confused and afraid. But I'm done with that." And just like that, he realized he was. "I'm not going to be such a pushover anymore. I'm going to tell you when you're being a jerk and I'm going to tell you when to back off. And you..you're going to keep being the awesome, confident person that I saw today, so that I don't have to do either."

Cassandra stared at him, her eyes unreadable, "You really think it would work?"

Will smiled genuinely, "I think it would be magic."

"There's only one problem," her voice deplete of humor, "we're not dating. And we're not going to." Cassandra turned again to leave.

"Then I'll wait," Will shouted to her retreating figure. "You can take whatever time you need to get this Vet guy out of your system, and when that's done, I'll be right here."

Cassandra frowned at him, but he didn't want an answer. Grabbing up the bag of peace-treaty ice cream and someone else's flowers, he walked confidently down the hall.

...

Micah walked past Emily's room like he had been doing all day. He had found her asleep ever since being called away from her side earlier, but this time she was awake and talking to Dr. Bandari, who was touching each machine to check it was working properly.

"Well," Bandari said as Micah rested himself in the door frame, "everything looks pretty stable. No internal bleeding. The swelling is going down."

"Well, I had a good doctor," Emily said, trying to make a joke.

"Most doctors are good doctors," Bandari coldly answered this attempt. "You had the best."

Emily nodded in apology and exclaimed, "Don't I know it!" Micah held back his laughter as she stammered on nervously, "Sorry. Yes, I-Ouch!"

"Good, you have full feeling on your left side," Bandari said, dropping a pin back into her pocket. They all knew there had been no need to use it, but he also knew Bandari didn't enjoy superfluous interactions. "A couple more weeks of rest and some-"

"Weeks?!" Emily cried. "I really wanted to get back to-"

"To what? Treating my patients?" Bandari asked. "Don't even think of it. We have people. It's not as though this hospital falls to its knees without you."

"No, I didn't mean it like that-" Emily answered awkwardly.

"I know, you meant your own career," Bandari said. Her eyes warmed slightly, "You're no use to me until you're better. So focus on that, alright? I'll check back in tomorrow."

Emily nodded, giving Micah a sad smile as he moved from the door.

"And Dr. Owens," Bandari interrupted his approach, "no more accidents, alright? Pay attention."

Emily nodded again and grinned through her embarrassment, giving her Attending a double thumbs up.

"I think she's starting to like you," Micah observed from the doorway, stepping slowly into the room. He felt a sudden nervousness being alone with her. She seemed fully aware of her surroundings this time.

"What about that exchange made you come up with that crazy idea?" Emily asked.

"She came to check on you herself," Micah explained. "It's almost sweet, actually."

Emily raised her brows thoughtfully. "I thought maybe she just missed having someone to yell at."

"Nah," Micah replied, shaking his head distractedly. He walked slowly to the edge of her bed, "Hey, about earlier-"

"Ugh, earlier!" Emily cried out immediately. "Okay, so I don't remember what I said..but I was REALLY out of it and I hope it wasn't anything too weird."

"Weird? No..." Micah said, his heart sinking. "Wait, you don't remember anything?"

"It's not that I don't remember it..." Emily explained. "It's more like, I can't tell which parts were real and which were, you know, drug induced."

"Oh," Micah said, reluctantly letting go of words that had kept him sane all day. "Well, I'll let you think about that-"

"You're seriously not going to tell me what I said?" Emily cried.

"-because I have something else to say right now..."

Emily interrupted, "You don't have to. You were right. I was way out of line, and I-"

"No, it's not about that..." Micah said with difficulty. "I need to admit something to you, and I need you to not judge me too harshly, okay?"

"Judge you?" Emily asked. "I'm just glad you're talking to me-"

"Dr. Bandari asked me to do the surgery...when they brought you in," Micah began. He began to feel ill, but pushed on, "And I couldn't do it. I just stood there and I begged her not to ask me to do it."

Micah didn't know what kind of reaction, but Emily stared at him, stunned.

He licked his lips, a thin sweat breaking across his face. "And um, yeah..." he continued through his dry mouth, afraid to look at her. "I feel like a coward. And I feel like...I abandoned you. And I...I just feel really bad, okay, and I wanted to be the one to tell you." He expected to see her disgust when he looked back up, but that is not the vision that met him. "What, why are you smiling?"

"Micah," she whispered, taking his hand, "you're not a coward-"

"Emily!" Came a brazen voice from the door. A woman who looked shockingly similar to Emily pushed past Micah and took her hand. "Oh, my baby, look at you! Your hair is all matted! What happened?"

"Mom!" Emily said, giving Micah an overwhelmed look.

Judy followed her daughter's gaze to see him, possibly for the first time. She patted Emily's ribs, which made her wince, "Oh, thank you Doctor, you may go now." Micah looked at Emily, unsure, but her mom waved an impatient hand, "well go on." She turned back to Emily and commented, "It must be a slow night."

"No, we're very busy," Emily said, still looking at him. "Mom this is Micah-"

Micah stepped closer and extended a hand, but Judy waved it away. "Honey, I'll meet all your little friends later." She patted him on the arm dismissively while looking at her daughter. "Right now, I want to be with you."

Micah didn't need to be told five times. He nodded to Emily and gave them both a quick, "good-night."

Emily smiled at him, reluctant to see him go.

Micah's heart beat lighter than it had been since the accident. She didn't think he was a coward. That was something. But why had she been grinning at him after he admitted everything? His cynical side suggested that she had sustained brain damage. His romantic side, somewhat squashed down as of late, stretched its metaphoric arms and yawned, again awake.


	19. Chapter 19

Episode 19

(In case you haven't done so already, please mentally cast Meryl Streep in the role of Emily's mother.)

Micah walked up to Emily's room to see if she was awake. Peeking in, he saw her talking animatedly with her Mom, who was sitting in the bed stroking Emily's hair.

"And it was no trouble either," Micah heard Judy saying as he knocked gently and entered, "since I had just gotten out of custody, so I just got in my car and-

Emily, who waved a hello to him, shot her attention back to Judy. "Wait. You were in jail?"

"Don't be so dramatic," Judy said, enjoying the attention, "it was just a holding cell. Well, how could I have known the contractor spoke such good English? He looked foreign to me."

Emily gave Micah a look of mortification. "Mom!"

"Oh honey, it was just an innocent joke," Judy continued. "They wanted to put the new intercom on a wall that was completely impractical, so I told him, no you can't put it there, that's where I hide the bodies."

Micah tried to hide a snort of laughter. Emily seemed less amused. "You said what?"

"It was all a mis-understanding," Judy explained breezily. "They had to bring in some scanners, and tore down a part of the wall. It's okay, though, I've actually left it like that. It really opens up the room."

"You could have gotten in real trouble!" Emily exclaimed.

"It's not like there were actually bodies there!" Judy cried innocently. "But the best part-you'll love this-the deputy cheif and I really hit it off. I slipped him my number and I'm pretty sure he'll call. I mean, he's married, but the way he looked at me...I think he might be The One."

"Or he was looking at you like you were crazy," Emily considered. Judy didn't look upset, she smiled indulgently and hit her daughter playfully on the shoulder. Emily continued, "Do NOT chase a married man. Not again."

"It's sweet that you're worried," Judy said fondly, "but he hasn't even called yet. And if he does, I could hardly let a little thing like his WIFE stand in the way of true love-"

"You promised," Emily whined.

"We'll just see what happens, won't we?" Judy asked, pulling out a handkerchief and coughing harshly.

Micah saw Emily's disapproval turned to concern. "Hey, how long have you had that cough?"

"What, oh this old thing?" Judy asked sweetly, pulling out a bottle of pills, removing one deftly, and popping it in her mouth. Micah cringed at the familiarity of her motions. "Don't worry about me, baby."

Emily had stopped listening. She snatched up the bottle and read it, her eyes growing wide. "Do you have lung cancer?"

Micah started to attention.

"Oh, I don't know," Judy said dismissively. " I saw a doctor who thought these would help. I'm waiting for a second opinion, though. I'm not sure I trust this new guy. His name is very Mid-Eastern sounding, I felt very nervous when he stared at me."

"Did you get a scan?" Emily asked eagerly.

"Why?" Judy asked. "Like I was going to pay extra for a little old cough! Don't you worry about me."

"I can't help worrying, mom, I'm a doctor," Emily said, suddenly assuming charge. She looked past her mother to Micah, who still stood in the doorway. "I don't suppose you could make her an appointment?"

He nodded. "Yeah, on it."

...

Cassandra helped her patient back into bed. The elderly woman, Grace, gave her a shaky hand of thanks.

"You know, you remind me a lot of myself at your age," Grace said with a smile.

Cassandra felt a pang of guilt that the old woman would unknowingly insult herself by saying this, but she said nothing.

"I know, I know," Grace said, "say that to a young person and it barely registers, but you know what? I was a tough old girl. I went everywhere and I did everything, and I never let no one tell me what to do."

Cassandra nodded, "I hope I'll be so lucky."

"Want me to tell you how?" Grace asked. When Cassandra nodded, she continued, "All you have to do are these two little things: Always say yes and always say no."

"Um, right..." Cassandra replied. "What have I been doing all these years?"

"I know, you think I've lost my mind," Grace said generously, "but listen here: always say yes to the things that make you happy and no to the things that don't." She pointed a knowing finger in Cassandra's face, "That's how to find happiness."

"I suppose that makes sense," Cassandra said without thinking.

"You suppose?" Grace demanded. "Oh, darling. Come here, let me prove it to you. You got a man?"

"I don't know," she answered truthfully. "Maybe."

"Maybe?" Grace exclaimed. "How you don't know about that? Maybe," she scoffed. "Do you or don't you?"

"No," Cassandra decided." I had a date the other night, but I...I had to leave."

"Oh did you now?" Grace asked suspiciously.

"I got a call to help in a surgery," Cassandra explained defensively. "It's not like I could say no."

"Alright, alright," Grace ceded. "You're the doctor, I don't know nothing about that. But I'm going to ask you a question, and I want you to answer me. When was the last time you felt really, truly happy?

Cassandra looked aside, wondering. She took a deep breath and remembered walking up the stairs to her apartment, a delirious giggle on her lips. She reached her doors, turning her laughing face...and there was Will, smiling at her. She locked eyes as she opened the door and the feeling of intimacy overpowered her senses.

Back in the present, Cassandra couldn't help but smile.

"Now that's what I'm talking about," Grace grinned with her, "So tell me, who is he?"

...

"So there I was," Judy told Will, "up on stage, surrounded by all these Chinamen-"

Will laughed, "I think Chinese is the appropriate word."

"Oh, darling, you know what I mean!" Judy exclaimed. "Anyway, there I was, and all I could think was 'did I remember to put knickers on?'"

"What?" Will cried.

"I couldn't remember! Can you believe that?" Judy asked, roaring in laughter. "But I decided, what the hell? It's not like anyone gets to live forever, right?" She gave him a knowing smile, "So...I went for it."

Will shook his head in amusement, waiting to speak until he had caught his breath. "I can't believe you did that."

She shrugged in fake humility, proud to see him impressed. "You just have to live without fear. That's what I always say."

"Yeah, yeah. I know your philosophies," Will teased, "but what happened to the one-armed sailor?"

"I don't know," Judy said, as though she'd never thought about it before. "I guess he's still out there somewhere, pulling at the ropes with his teeth. Which reminds me-" she reached over and slapped Will's hand sharply.

"Ouch!" He cried. "What was that for?"

"I heard you broke up with my Emily," Judy declaimed. "If you weren't so cute I think I might be very cross with you."

"No, look," Will defended himself, despite the fact that she was still grinning at him, "she broke up with me. I mean, don't tell anyone, but that's what happened."

"But why?" Judy shrieked. "She's been in love with you for years..." She reached to cover her mouth, "Oops, pretend I didn't say that!"

"It's okay," Will told her. I" feel strongly about her too. But we're friends. That's how we're best, actually."

"I don't get that," Judy said forlornly. "I tried to be friends with men, but I could never make it stick."

"I don't know how it works," Will admitted. "It just does sometimes."

"Hey you two!" Emily said cheerfully, joining them.

"Baby!" Judy rejoiced. "How'd it go?"

"Healing well. Swelling is down," Emily answered, giving them a double thumbs up. She gave Will a grateful smile, "Thanks for keeping her entertained."

"It was the other way around, I assure you," Will said, patting Judy fondly on the arm.

...

"So, are you going to ask her out?" Asked a voice from behind Micah.

He turned to see his red-headed Ex. "Harrie," he said, disappointed, "I'd rather not talk about this with you."

"Well excuse me for having a vested interest," Harriet said defensively.

Micah shook his head, annoyed, "No, Harrie, I thought we'd talked about this-"

"Yeah, we agreed it sucked," Harriet said quickly. "But that doesn't mean it always will."

"I don't want to have this talk with you every few days," Micah said firmly, finding it unbelievable that he was having to talk about this yet again. He said definitively, "I'm flattered, but no."

Harriet shook her head vigorously, "You can't just make that decision for both of us."

"I can make it for myself," Micah said, walking off, "which ought to be enough."

"Come on," Harriet reached out, stopping him, "have dinner with me. That Thai place we liked is still there."

"I know, I eat there all the time," Micah said. "And I have no problem grabbing a bite with a friend, but I can't. I'm going to the airport tonight."

"Airport? You taking a vacation?" Harriet asked. "I can pack my bikini..."

"Uh, no...decidedly not a vacation," Micah answered, wondering how much he wanted to say. "I'm going to visit my mom. She's...um, she's at Mayo."

"Oh...right," Harriet said solemnly, "I heard about that. Micah, I'm-"

"It's alright," Micah said quickly, not wanting her sympathy. "You know, I hear she's doing better anyway."

"Dr. Harmon," called Dr. Bandari as she rushed past them, "to imaging. Mrs. Owens is going in."

Micah looked up, surprised. "What? Wait," he ran to catch up with her. "I was hoping to be put on that. I have experience with-"

"Oh, now you think you want a case?" Bandari asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "What makes you sure you wouldn't rather sit this one out too?"

Micah flexed his jaw. "I never asked to sit anything out."

Dr. Bandari arched an eyebrow. "Don't trouble yourself. Dr. Harmon, you're with me."

Micah bit back his angry response, watching Bandari's retreating figure. He cringed inside when Harrie approached once more.

"Hey, I could use a ride tonight," Harriet said. "My car is in the garage. Plus, I want to hear more about your mom."

Micah sighed. "A ride I can do. Apparently it's the only thing, though."

...

"You're Emily's boss? You're very pretty," Judy told Dr. Bandari, her voice surprised. She turned to Emily, who had accompanied her, "What would you say she is, Ems? Latina? Indian? Not that it matters, I trust you. Indians have the best sense of detail, they do my nails all the time."

Bandari gave Emily a thin, humorless grimace and handed the case file blithely to Harriet. "Dr. Harmon, I think you can take it from here."

Bandari motioned for Emily to follow her from the room, which she did with a sense of dread. She felt herself tremble. "Dr. Owens," Bandari said, turning to face Emily once the door had closed, "having met your mother, I have changed my assessment of you from socially deficient to being miraculously well-adjusted."

"Um, thanks?" Emily said as Bandari turned to walk away.

"Didn't see that coming," Bandari said at last.

"So, that's your Mom, huh?" Harriet asked, closing the door to the imaging room behind her. Her inflection suggested that Emily should be embarrassed. "She's, um, interesting."

"I prefer the blanket term Special," Emily said, gritting her teeth.

"You shouldn't be here, you know," Harriet said. "I just mean, you need rest."

"I've had rest," Emily said. She realized how unprofessional she sounded. "I, um, I don't know, Bandari said it would be fine."

Harriet nodded, biting her lip. She gave Emily a searching look and asked carefully, "So, you like the hospital, huh?"

"Yeah, it's great," Emily answered awkwardly. "I'm learning a lot."

"Right," Harriet said slowly, "but do you love the hospital or just like it?"

"Um...I, uh...I hadn't thought about it," Emily mumbled, sure she was missing something. "I'm pretty fond-"

"It's just," Harriet interrupted, "sometimes people think they love things, but they only like them. I mean, after your internship are you planning to stick around? Or it that it-you're gone-just when the hospital needs you most?"

Harriet spoke passionately, clearly not talking about the hospital. It sounded like she was still in love with Micah. "I don't know," Emily said, taking up the metaphor unskillfully, "that would be between me and the hospital."

Harriet grimaced, realizing that her code had been cracked. "I just, I messed things up with the hospital, but now that I'm back...I remembered how I felt about these walls. I love this place."

"You think I don't?" Emily asked, offended at the suggestion.

"I think you don't know enough to say either way," Harriet said, leaving her affirmative silent. "But if you're planning to get in the way of people who do, you're going to have a rough time."

Emily glared at Harriet, hardly believing what she heard. was that a threat? Was she suggesting that Emily did not care about Micah? Her gaze faltered, however, on remembering his devastation upon seeing her with Will.

"Oh honey," Judy's voice made Emily come back to herself. "I didn't tell you about Burt from the Philharmonic yet, did I?"

Emily gave a last stink-eye to Harriet and slid to the microphone. "Try not to move, Mom," she instructed. "It's important that you stay still-"

"I will, I will," Judy assured. "But if I don't tell you now, I might forget."

Emily settled in, trying to ignore Harriet's angry gaze at her back. "Go ahead."

"So, I was wandering around after the concert..." Judy began.

"Hey guys, look at this," said the Imager, pointing to a shadow on the screen.

"Mom, hold on," Emily said, turning to examine it.

Harriet said seriously, "I'll schedule a biopsy."

...

"You're going to see him again, though, right?" Tyra asked as she and Cassandra sat in the break room.

"I don't know," Cassandra answered, remembering her relief that she had been called away from her date by an emergency. "It kind of seemed like everything had to be am argument with him...like every time I opened my mouth I was walking into a mine field."

"Okay, but he's hot, right?" Tyra asked crassly.

"Yes, he happens to be very attractive-" Cassandra began.

"So go for it. Who cares?" Tyra demanded. "No one is asking you to have babies with him. Just get your freak on, then dump him."

Cassandra looked away, considering this, but she saw Will watching her. He quickly averted his eyes.

"Unless..." Tyra hissed, commenting on this silent exchange of glances.

"No, it's not what you think!" Cassandra exclaimed a little too loudly.

"Really," Tyra asked, "cause I'm thinking-"

"No, don't say it," Cassandra commanded. "I'm not thinking about getting back together with Will. I'm not! I just...he seems different."

"Like Get In My Pants Right Now different?" Tyra teased. "What happened?"

"No," Cassandra shook her head. "And I don't know. It was something he said. The way he's been behaving." She pulled at her ponytail, "Ugh, I don't know."

"You're upset about him and Emily," Tyra pointed out.

Cassandra shook her head, "You know, I was. I really was," she agreed, "but then I wasn't. I can't explain it."

"Hmm," Tyra said thoughtfully. "Maybe you're in love with him."

"Ugh, take it back!" Cassandra cried. "Alright, I'm convinced. I'm going to go call Jessie."

Cassandra stood up swiftly and brushed past Will without a glance. She climbed to the roof and took out her phone...and the came to a stop.

Cassandra thought about Grace and her advice. She wondered if calling Jessie would make her happy, or just lead to further defensiveness and insecurity. She thought again about the last time she felt really happy, then she remembered how Jessie was supposed to be the thing that helped her move forward.

Staring out over the city, Cassandra felt the crisp late-winter wind blow over her. She dreaded having to make the decision.

But there was no hurry, Cassandra realized. She was allowed to decide not to decide. Her future self could figure it out.

Slipping her phone back into her pocket, Cassandra returned to the stairs and headed back to her job.

...

Micah entered Emily's recovery room to find her mother once again in the midst of a rant.

"You wouldn't believe it, honey," Judy was saying, "I went to the bank on sixth avenue-the one where all the Jews work-and I asked them for just a teeny little loan-you know, to get my jewelry business off the ground-and would you believe it, they turned me down!"

"Well, you have no jewelry experience," Emily explained logically.

"What should that matter?" Judy cried. "Are they too good to support Hand-Made American merchandise?" She searched the room as though it held a person who must naturally agree." So I tried an Italian bank, thinking they'd be more understanding-"

Micah could tell this was a lengthy tale, and didn't think he'd have the time to wait. He cleared his throat. "Hi. I don't think I've officially introduced myself. I'm Dr. Barnes."

"Micah," Emily agreed silently, blushing.

"Just call me Judy," her Mom said. She reached out a hand that Micah approached. "And where are your parents from?"

Emily turned to her, "Mom!"

"Um, right here. Denver," Micah answered, thinking it an innocent question. "Though, my mom's in Minnesota right now."

Judy corrected, "I mean before that..."

Micah opened then closed his mouth, taking in Emily's embarrassed face. Thankfully, his beeper went off. He swallowed awkwardly and shrugged, with a smile to Emily. Her eyes were suddenly attentive, as though she wanted to talk with him. He turned to the door as Harriet entered with a wheel chair.

"Mrs. Owens," she announced, "I have come to retrieve you."

"Ugh, finally. I am so ready to get this over with," Judy complained, despite the fact that she had caused the delay. "I hope you don't mind that I wanted a wheel chair," she said, realizing this, "I just thought if I'm here I should get the grand treatment."

Shoving her bag at Micah, who held it as she got situated, Judy sat and motioned for them to be off. Harriet pushed her down the hall and Micah followed into the elevator.

"So, when are you picking me up?" Harriet asked.

"I thought we could just leave from work," Micah told her, conscious that Emily's mom was listening. "It's not too far, right?"

"The restaurant? Nope," Harriet said. She added with a sly grin, "And my place is right there..."

"Um, great," Micah said, not caring to know that. "Well, I'll see you then." He waved at Emily's mom when the elevator opened to his floor, "It was nice to officially meet you, Judy."

...

Cassandra walked by Grace's room only to see it being re-made.

"Did Grace check out?" She asked the Orderly. "I didn't authorize that."

The Orderly shrugged. Cassandra walked to the nurse at the station and inquired after her. "She passed away, Dr. Kopelson," the Nurse said. "Dr. Bandari was around the corner and responded immediately, but Mrs. Brown had already stopped breathing."

Cassandra nodded. If Bandari had been the one to respond, the Grace had gotten the best care possible. Regardless, she couldn't help but think that now two of the people she'd bared her soul to were now dead.

Letting the gruesome thought of a gypsy curse float through her mind, she realized in a moment of clarity that this was probably because she let down her guard to the sick and infirm instead of for friends and loved ones.

Cassandra felt an urgent need to talk to someone, and to her surprise, the first person that came to her mind was Will. He was in surgery, however, and besides, she wasn't sure she wanted anything to do with him.

Climbing to the roof, she dialed Jessie's number.

"Hey, I was wondering when you'd call," said his voice over the phone. "Thought I might have scared you off with the lobster."

"Oh, uh, no," Cassandra responded, trying to ignore the accusation in his voice. "No, that really was an emergency."

"Oh, good," Jessie said. "Let's try that again then."

"I just, um," Cassandra fought back tears, "one of my patients just died, and I'm having trouble..."

"Cassandra, I'm so sorry. It happens, though," Jessie said supportively. Then he continued, "I mean, I just put down a Maltese named Mr. Scratchy-Bottom-"

"Please," Cassandra interrupted, her mind disagreeably combining his situation with hers. "I can't really compare losing a human life to putting down a dog right now."

"That's hardly fair," Jessie returned, "we're all just animals."

"Yes, but I talked to her," Cassandra explained the difference. "I told her about my life. She listened and-"

"Animals listen," he argued. "They hold a place in our hearts-"

"I don't want to butt heads with you about whose job is more important," Cassandra stopped him. "I'm trying to tell you that my heart hurts and-"

"And I was trying to explain that I know how you feel," Jessie broke in, "because Mr. Scratchy-"

"Okay, you know what?" Cassandra said, suddenly done. "This feels really forced. I feel like every single thing with you is a competition, except that I'm not interested in competing."

Jessie's harsh tone had disappeared. "Cassandra, I was just joking." He corrected, "I mean, it started out as a joke."

"Don't you think me being able to tell when you're joking is kind of a big deal?" Cassandra demanded. "You need someone with a different sense of humor than mine, maybe."

This sparked a new argument. "I have never had someone complain about my sense of humor before," he said. "Are you kidding me? Tell the truth, you think you're better than me."

Cassandra rolled her eyes. "Okay, Jessie." She could hardly believe the words that were forming in her mind. "People don't have to always be better or worse than the people around them." She decided at once, an image of Grace in her mind, "I'm just going to say no to this. I wish you and Mr. Scratchy-Bottom the best."

She heard his voice launch into an argument as she pulled the phone from her ear. She hung up.

...

"You're giving her a ride?" AJ asked, incredulous. "Careful dude, she's not ready to move on."

Micah sighed, "No, it's okay. I talked to her, she gets it."

"Well," AJ said doubtfully, "either way, you should probably ask Dr. Owens out before Harrie gets the idea to make a grand gesture."

Micah threw his arms wide, "I wish people would just lay off. Especially you. How can you even say that? She's seeing someone." He added, "It's okay, though, I'm just glad to have her as a friend."

"Wait," AJ demanded, "you seriously haven't heard?"

"Heard what?" Micah asked.

"That she's single," AJ said. "She broke up with Dr. Collins...or he broke up with her. I've heard mixed reports..."

"She...oh," Micah said as this fact settled. "No, that doesn't-"

"So, come on," AJ interrupted his thoughts. "Seize the opportunity."

"It's not that simple," Micah said, sensing the honesty in his own words. "Remember the part where she turned me down for her med-school friend?"

"You gotta leave the past in the past, man," AJ instructed.

"Easy for you to say," Micah mumbled.

Lost in thought, he didn't hear Dr. Bandari approach. "Dr. Barnes," she said imperiously, "I'm surprised you're still choosing to come in for work. Your patients must feel so privileged."

She handed a folder to a nurse and rushed away.

Micah followed. "Dr.-Gina!" He shouted, getting her to stop. "I get it, I messed up, but these underhanded comments-"

"Do you have any idea why we don't allow surgeons to operate on members of their family?" Bandari asked.

Micah staggered back. "Because if one is too precious with the patient, they may fail to take necessary risks-"

"Exactly," Bandari said, staring through him," so tell me, why would you be so unwilling to take such risks with an intern you barely know?"

Mich swallowed, at a loss for words. His heart beat frantically in his chest.

Bandari crossed her arms, looking annoyed. "You know what, don't answer that. I don't want to know. If you let your personal life get in the way of your job again-"

"I won't," Micah insisted, glad to be away from her previous question.

Bandari rolled her eyes, "Just ask her out already."

...

"Still no word from the labs?" Emily asked eagerly as Tyra came into the room.

"No, they're pretty back-logged. I'll keep trying though," she answered. "Heard your follow-up went well."

"Yeah, I'm feeling pretty good," Emily answered. "Ready to get out of this hospital gown."

Tyra gave her an appraising look, "Seriously, that color does nothing for you."

"This is Tyra?" Judy asked. She spoke to Emily, "I mean, I should have known that her name was a little ethnic." She turned back to Tyra, not seeing the offense in her face. "Happy to meet you sweetie. You know, you look familiar."

Tyra shrugged, offering no help. She turned to Emily, "So...all this drama has drowned out all the drama. I heard you and Micah are on speaking terms again."

"Well," Emily said awkwardly, "we haven't had much time."

"Are you sure I haven't seen you before?" Judy cut in. "Maybe at the opera?"

Tyra rolled her eyes, "Right, like I'd be caught dead there." She added to Emily, "So, tell him."

"Tell him what?" Emily asked.

"That you want to have lots of sex and babies," Tyra joked.

"Oh Emily, I wouldn't recommend that as an opening line," Judy said seriously. "Especially not with a man already in a relationship."

"He's not in a relationship," Tyra said tersely. L

"Oh no?" Judy said, willing to compete, "Then why was he saying he'd pick her up after his shift to go to a restaurant?"

"When...when did you that?" Emily asked, her heart dropping.

"When they were wheeling me down the promenade to get my picture taken," Judy answered vaguely.

"We call it a hallway," Tyra spat, "and scanning."

Emily looked at her wrist, and seeing it empty, grabbed at Tyra's watch. "His shift ends...five minutes ago! I have to catch him before-"

With her sentence left unfinished, Emily shot out of her room.

Left behind, Judy snapped her fingers triumphantly. she pointed to Tyra, "I know!" She exclaimed, "you look just like Clair Huxtable."

Tyra nodded, "Oh right, because we're both black."

Judy slapped her leg, "That must be it!"

...

"Micah!" Emily's voice called as he headed towards his car. "Micah wait!"

He saw, waiting in his car, Harriet's eyes grow wide. He turned to see Emily approaching, dressed in her hospital gown. "What are you-?" He began. "Emily, you shouldn't be out here like this!"

"I don't care," she said quickly. "Micah don't go out with her."

Micah didn't think he had heard her right. He blanched. "What?"

"Mom told me she heard about you," Emily said, gesturing to Harriet in the car. "I know that I have no right to ask anything of you." She began to ramble breathlessly, "but I just think that maybe I had to get Will out of my system, because the moment I did, I realized how much I cared about you." Micah felt his heart beat faster. She look a tentative step closer." I don't deserve it, I know I don't, but I think if you gave me another chance-"

Seeing her become emotional in the process of baring her soul, Micah tried to stop her ranting. "Emily, Emily!" He called. "Hey, it's okay. I wasn't taking Harriet on a date. I'm going to the airport to go see my mom for a few days." He gestured towards the car, "Harriet just needs a ride. I was never going to..." Micah licked his lips, wondering if he should say what he wanted to. He took a step closer. "Since we met..." he started, "Emily, it's always been you."

Micah watched as Emily's face shifted from fear to joy. "Micah..."

He stepped to close the gap between them and wrapped his arms protectively around her. Emily sniffled, hugging him tightly. "I've been going crazy. I missed you."

Micah pulled away, looking into her eyes. "I missed you, too."

Before he knew what was happening, she had leaned in to kiss him an he had pulled away instinctively.

Though part of him wanted to, he wasn't ready to kiss her.

"Okay, don't over-think this, because I know you want to..." he said carefully, seeing the confusion in her face. "I just, I need some time...When I saw you and Will, I..." He felt himself choke at the memory. "I just need some time to find that trust again."

"Micah, I would never have done that if we were already together," Emily argued, her ranting unfinished. "I was just really confused because you didn't pick me for that surgery, but you've been great these past months and-"

"Emily!" Micah once more stopped her embarrassed rant. He smiled. "I know that. I know that HERE," he said pointing to his head. He moved his hand to heart, "but you have to understand-"

Emily nodded. "No, I get it. I can take it slow." She said confidently, "I'll make it up to you."

Micah nodded his assurance. He approached her and kissed the side of Emily's head. He said into her ear, "It was nice to meet your mom."

"Was it?" Emily asked. She teased, "And you thought your sister was interesting."

Micah shook his head. "My sister is still interesting. But your mom is entertaining too." He grimaced, "Kinda racist."

He and Emily shared a laugh. Harriet honked the horn.

Micah came back to himself. He stepped away from her reluctantly. "I have to go," he said. "I'll call you after I land, okay?"

Emily nodded, looking happy in her hospital gown, "Yeah."


	20. Chapter 20

Episode 20

Emily laughed, clutching her ceramic coffee mug tightly. She say across from Micah at the coffee shop, and he too was laughing.

"No, I'm telling you," Emily said between breathes, "you should have been there. We totally treated Santa Claus last weekend."

"But how could you tell it was him?" Micah asked, taking a sip of his latte. "Was it the red suit? Or the, uh, the reindeer in the waiting room?"

"That would have been cooler," Emily admitted, "but no." She threw her arms up. "Fine, it was just this plump, jolly old guy! But he was so funny. He couldn't go five minutes without telling jokes. He told this one about, oh what was it? A, uh, a turtle and a musk-rabbit walk into a bar-"

"Hold on," Micah stopped her, "what's a musk-rabbit?"

"It doesn't matter," Emily said dismissively, "it's just part of the joke-"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not a thing," Micah insisted. "Have you even heard of a musk-rabbit?"

"No..." she admitted, "but I don't need to hear about things in order for them to exist..."

"Like Santa Claus?" Micah teased. "I'm calling bullshit. Not a thing."

"Alright," Emily teased, "just for that, you don't get to hear the joke." Micah feigned disappointment, to which Emily answered, "Not that it's much of a loss, though. I probably would have messed it up."

Emily grinned at Micah with a shy smile that he returned. It was the latest of the awkward pauses that dotted their conversations these days.

Tentatively, Emily decided to broach the subject that had been on her mind, "I was thinking maybe I should go with you next time. To see Joyce, I mean. I miss seeing her." She added, "I think maybe we were friends."

"Maybe?" Micah echoed. "I think she likes you more than me sometimes."

"Well," Emily joked, wondering if she was being too obvious, "see now, that's just not possible." She cringed. There didn't seem to be a moment when she didn't try her hardest to win back his affections, even when telling herself to back off.

Micah looked thoughtfully at her for several moments, then said, "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course," Emily replied.

He hesitated, weighing his words carefully. "I mean...these past few weeks have been nice, right?"

"Ye-Yeah," Emily said, surprised at his directness. She tried to keep her emotions in check. "I've really enjoyed hanging out with you."

"Right," Micah said, smiling bashfully. He looked thoughtfully at her again. Taking a deep breath, he began, "I...I know I said I wanted to take it slow..."

Emily held her breath at the gist of his words, but he was interrupted by the ringing of his phone.

Frowning, Micah reached for it. He shot a guilty look at Emily and answered it.

"Hey Mom," he said to them both, his mood light. "I'm here with Emily. She says Hi-" Emily watched as his face fell. "Mom, calm down. Who, Liz? What do you mean she fell down the stairs? Is she okay?"

Micah looked over at Emily, whose eyes were wide in shock. He told her, "Um, I'm so sorry, I have to go." Emily nodded, concern written all over her face. She watched as he walked away, hearing, "I don't know if it would hurt the baby. Is she awake?"

Emily felt conflicted. As a doctor, she couldn't help but wish health upon everyone-even the person who had tormented her. At the same time, it sounded like Micah had been about to say...she tried not to dwell on it. He could have said anything, she told herself. Anything at all that ended with the words "I know I said I wanted to take it slow..."

Despite herself, she felt jealous of Joyce for stealing his attention.

...

Cassandra's app emitted a triumphant noise as she answered yet another question correct. Will cringed. The noise had become almost grating under her single-minded intensity.

"We can take a break, you know," he told her. "The exam is a month away. There's plenty of time to learn it."

"Cramming at the last minute isn't learning," Cassandra said definitively. "I don't want to just know these facts, I want to KNOW them. I can't help that you're not as interested. You wanted to hang out with me, remember?"

"Yeah, exactly," Will mumbled. "I want to hang out with you."

Cassandra looked up from her phone, annoyed. "Will, I don't-"

"I thought you were considering giving me a second chance," he blurted. "That's why you broke up with the Vet, right?"

Cassandra took offense at this. "Self-absorbed much? I can make decisions without thinking about you."

"I know," Will said, trying too look charming, "but, you know, honestly, that's why you broke up with him right?"

Cassandra turned back to her phone. "That is none of your business."

Will crossed his arms in his own personal triumph as her phone made another sound of success. "Sounds like a yes to me," he said confidently. "So let's go get a drink."

"Yeah, not going to happen," Cassandra said without looking up. "But good try."

Will's shoulders sagged in frustration. "Cassandra, what's going on? We hang out, we laugh, you seem happy," he said. "So why can't we just...move forward?"

Cassandra met his eyes briefly, then looked away. She dropped her phone in her pocket and moved away. "I should go."

Will grabbed her arm to stop her. "Why won't you talk to me?" He asked. "I'm being patient. I'm really trying here."

She looked at him as though considering a confession, and Will felt a moment hope. Then she turned away. "I have to go. My patient is going in for imaging at nine, I should get her ready."

Will watched her walk away, unsure of what to do about her. He wanted to be with her, he knew that much, but how long could he keep throwing himself against the brick wall of her guarded heart? What if this is all they would ever be-awkward friends who avoided each other's eyes?

Sighing, Will walked off into the hospital, feeling very tired.

...

"Bandari said they're bringing over the work I missed this morning," Emily told Tyra as she pushed open the door to her office. At the sight of the mountains of paper that greeted her, however, she fell dumb.

Tyra pushed through to see what Emily was goggling at. "That has got to be the world's largest stack of paperwork," she said, jaw dropping. "Wow, you could build a barrier around it and charge admission."

Emily tried to gather herself. "It's not that bad. I was only out of commission for a few weeks." She picked up a folder and looked over to the filing cabinet and saw more files jammed messily into hit. "So no one filled in for me, then," she observed.

Tyra shrugged. "You'd already gotten the orientation, I guess."

Emily turned to she friend, eyes full of a plea. "I don't suppose you could-"

"I am so not doing that," Tyra answered quickly, dropping down into the rolly chair.

Emily peaked inside cabinet and looked up in disgust. "I'm glad things moved forward in the name of medicine, but this seems like a lot.."

"Hey, wow, when did you become a hoarder?" Micah's voice asked from the door. Emily looked up, her face manically eager. Tyra pointed at him in agreement.

"It's...it's okay," Emily said, trying not to infuse too much meaning into her words. "It's not like I have a life, right?"

Micah looked down, reading into it anyway.

"Mmm...awkward," Tyra described, jumping up. "And that's my cue."

"Is your sister okay?" Emily asked him.

"Yeah, yeah. I think so," Micah said. "I talked to her doctor, he said they're checking her for a concussion."

"Well, if there's nothing obvious then that's a good sign," Emily replied. "What about the baby?"

Micah didn't answer. With a pained look, he sat in recently vacated chair and hid his face in his hands.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked, dropping the folder she held back into the cabinet.

"There is no baby," Micah confessed, cringing against the world's judgement.

Emily's eyes bulged. "I thought you said-"

"She lied!" Micah cried. "And when I found out...I let her." He said in a hurry, "I know it was really wrong, but Mom was refusing to do the trial and she was talking like she had given up...and I figured that anything that gave her hope couldn't be bad." He gave Emily a pleading look, "You should have seen her light up. I mean, that's right, right? Grandchild or not, wouldn't she rather be alive?"

Emily nodded, feeling conflicted. There were always choices to make, but sometimes each choice was equally awful.

Micah sought to read her expression. "You think I should tell her."

"I didn't say anything," Emily said honestly.

"I can see what you're thinking," Micah told her. "I always could."

For some reason, this made Emily blush. She argued, "Are you sure you're not just projecting what you think I might be thinking?"

He shook his head, looking at her with a half-smile. He turned away. "You're right, though. I should tell her."

"Yeah, well, I'm a font of expert advice apparently," Emily said with a shrug.

"You don't think I should tell her?" Micah challenged.

"What? No, I do," Emily opined. "You should."

"Told you," Micah said. "Like a book."

...

Joyce saw that Micah was calling her just as Liz's doctor walked into her room. Turning off her phone, she turned to the newcomer.

"Mrs. Barnes, I'm Dr. Samuels," said the Doctor. "I've been keeping an eye on your daughter."

"She's okay, right?" Joyce begged to know. "It's all my fault. I asked her to get me a slice of pie from the cafeteria-"

Dr. Samuels held up his hands. "These things happen. It's not your fault. She could have fallen at any other time." He added politely, "It's lucky she did it when she did, actually, that stairwell is pretty empty at night."

"I just don't understand why she was on the stairs to begin with," Joyce fretted. "Are your elevators not working?"

"I can't say for sure," Dr. Samuels said dismissively. "Stairs are better exercise, I suppose. You can ask her when you see her."

Joyce made to get up. "Can I go now?"

"Oh, no, not yet," he answered, motioning for her to relax. "She's awake and she's fine. You, on the other hand, are scheduled for a treatment in half an hour, so we need you to stick around for a bit. You can see her after."

"But she's okay?" Joyce asked again.

Dr. Samuels nodded. "We just need to keep her under observation for a little while. She seems to be in perfect health."

"Oh thank god," Joyce muttered. She looked up quickly, "And the baby?"

"What baby?" Dr. Samuels asked.

"Liz is pregnant," Joyce explained, feeling slightly angry at his oversight. "Is the baby okay?"

"Um..." Dr. Samuels double-checked her charts, "your daughter isn't pregnant."

"No, she is," Joyce insisted. "I'm going to have a granddaughter. The doctor she saw told her it was a girl."

"We ran a full x-ray on Liz," Dr. Samuels insisted calmly, "she's not pregnant. I don't know which doctor she was seeing who told her that..."

"What do you mean she's not pregnant?" Joyce cried, panicked. "She lost the baby?"

"She shows no signs of having been pregnant. Mrs. Barnes-"

"I need to go see my daughter," Joyce demanded, pushing herself out of bed.

"I really must insist that you rest," Dr. Samuels said, blocking her way. "You are on very strong medications-"

"Please, I just need to see Lizzie-" Joyce struggled against him.

"Please, Mrs. Barnes," he begged. Turning, he called out into hall, "Can I have some help in here?"

Joyce pushed at him, then backed off, looking dizzy. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she fell, her body shaking.

...

"And how are you today Mr...O'Malley?" Will asked cursorily, checking his clipboard for his patient's name.

"Dr.," the man corrected. "It's Dr. O'Malley. Or you could just call me Liam."

Will looked up in interest. "Liam it is. You're a doctor, huh? Where do you practice?"

"Over in California, actually. Near the redwoods," Liam said, nodding his head in what Will assumed with that direction. "I have my own practice there."

"What brings you to Colorado?" Will asked, reading the chart. "The skiing?"

"You better believe it!" Liam said genially. "That's why I'm here, actually. I fell coming down the hill yesterday and I've had a ringing in my ear ever since. I thought maybe an MRI and a-"

Will held up a hand. "I'm sure you'll agree that we don't need too many doctors in the room, huh?" He said with a laugh. "You take care of so many others, why don't you let me take care of you today?"

Liam eyed him for a moment and then broke into laughter. "You're good!" He said, slapping his knee. "Hey, what's your plan?"

"Well, the MRI is a good place to start," Will said with a smile. "We get a lot of skiers with-"

"No, no," Liam interrupted. "I mean with your career. What's your plan?"

Will thought. "Um, well, I'm studying to be a chief surgeon, so just doing that for now."

"I only ask," Liam said comfortingly, "because you have a great bedside manner. You would make a good primary care physician."

Will shook his head, "Oh, I don't think-"

"You sneer, but I'll tell you what," Liam said, pointing a finger, "I opened up my own practice 35 years ago, and I've watched the babies I brought into this world having their own babies. I've been there for them as they ailed and died, but also as they lived and rejoiced. I don't care what those ambitious sons-a-bitches say, being a part of people's lives like that...well, it's just the best feeling in the world."

"That sounds..." Will considered, "really nice, actually."

"You remind me a lot of myself," Liam said and Will examined his ears. "I was studying to be a surgeon. It was so competitive, though. So much of it had nothing to do with the patients. Sometimes we talked about them so objectively that they didn't even seem like people. I had to get out. It was the best thing I ever did."

"But what about your residency?" Will asked.

"You have a license," Liam told him. "Everything else is just specialization. Just think about it."

Will nodded and continued his examination. But he thought about it. He thought about it and he felt tired.

...

"So, you told her?" Emily asked, coming out onto the roof and seeing Micah sitting there, looking thoughtful.

"No," he answered. "I tried. She didn't pick up. I think maybe she's watching her soap opera and can't be bothered."

Emily nodded, sitting down beside him. "Hey, I get it. What WILL Victoria do with Stephan's baby?"

Micah laughed. "If only I could be so interesting. Try to do the right thing..."

"Boy do I know it," Emily teased.

Micah looked at Emily's grinning face and considered her. He couldn't help but realize that interacting with her was so different now. Before he had wanted so desperately to ask her out, though his fear got in the way. Now he knew that he had a standing invitation. But there was a different kind of courage required to ask her out a second time. He thought he'd had it this morning, but now his doubts were back. The rejection hurt too badly.

Emily hadn't forgotten. "Do you remember this morning...you had wanted to ask me something?"

Micah looked away, feeling embarrassed. "Oh, it was nothing. Just something silly."

"I like silly," Emily said desperately. "The more ridiculous the better, sometimes, actually."

She stared at him, her face full of desperate hope. Micah felt tremendous guilt. It was flattering how badly she now seemed to want to be with him, but it also made him very uncomfortable.

Micah was almost grateful when his phone rang. It was a Minnesota number. His relief turned to fear.

"Hello?" He answered. "Yes, this is her son." Then he heard the words that cause terror, "A stroke? That's not possible, the medication she's on doesn't cause...but she's in surgery, right? And do they plan to cut through...no wait...no I don't care how busy you are..."

Giving Emily a reluctant grin, he dismissed himself.

...

"I had the strangest conversation just now," Will said, coming up upon Cassandra in the hall.

"Your patient thinks he's an alien?" Cassandra asked. "Because that is what it would take to compete with my weird patient."

"Not that strange, alas no," Will said with a laugh. "What's wrong with yours?"

"He needs his appendix out, as far as I can tell..." Cassandra explained, "but he kept barking at me."

"Barking?" Will asked, "As in..."

"Woof, woof," Cassandra answered. "Yeah. What about yours?"

"Well, maybe 'strange' was the wrong word. to use," Will amended. "Have you ever thought about opening your own practice?"

"No," Cassandra said without thinking. "Will, a surgeon needs a large team."

"Right, I know..." Will replied, "but what if I wasn't a surgeon? What if I was just a doctor?"

"What are you talking about?" Cassandra asked, her nerves suddenly on edge.

"I have this patient," Will explained quickly, "he's a doctor. He seems really cool and he really makes a difference in people's lives."

"We make a difference in people's lives," Cassandra corrected. "Here."

"I didn't mean...I just..." Will stammered, "here it's so competitive. Don't you ever just want to be a doctor?"

Cassandra rolled her eyes. "It's competitive because there's a lot at stake. Because only the best SHOULD be wielding a knife."

"I get that...I totally get that..." Will said defensively. "but I've felt kind of, you know, in a rut here. And things aren't really going anywhere with...um, my personal life. I just wonder-"

"Are you giving me an ultimatum?" Cassandra snapped.

"What? No!"

"Yes you are!" Cassandra cried. "You're saying that if I don't go out with you, you're going to leave."

"I, no...I was just rambling. I didn't mean that-" Will tried to say.

"Yes you did," Cassandra said, angry. "Go throw your life away. Go right ahead."

Will felt his anger flair. "Just because you have this blind, manic ambition to reach the top doesn't mean we all do." He continued, despite knowing that he was going too far, "Some people would be happy to simply spend their lives helping people!"

Cassandra stared at him. If she could have set him on fire with a look, he would have been reduced to a pile of ashes in moments. "Screw you, Will Collins," she said coldly. Turning on her heals, she walked slowly away from him.

...

Emily searched the hospital for Micah, having been unable to get him off her mind since hearing his half of the conversation with Joyce's Doctor. Turning into a little-used corridor, she heard light piano music. It was not expertly played, and therefore not a recording. Curiously, she followed it.

Stepping into a small common area, she saw Micah sitting at a forgotten piano in the corner, plunking away a sad prelude.

"I didn't know this thing still played," Emily observed when the notes of the song's last chord had faded. She walked towards him, "I didn't know you played either. You're pretty good."

Micah smiled sadly. "Yeah, I'm a regular Liberace."

Emily sat beside him on the bench. She bit her lip, then began, "I didn't mean to overhear you on the phone-"

"My mom had a stroke," Micah told her without letting her finish. "She's still in surgery.'

Emily looked at him sadly. "Micah, I'm so sorry."

"Me too," he said harshly. "I thought that I had to get her into that trial no matter what...even if it meant lying to her..."

"You couldn't help it-" Emily tried to say.

"I could, actually," Micah responded, his anger at himself evident. "I'm a doctor. I knew her condition...her prognosis..."

"But the trial-"

"A long shot!" Micah interrupted. "A painful long shot far away from her home." His look softened. "All she wanted was to go peacefully, surrounded by the people who love her...instead she's probably going to wake up paralyzed, with strangers. If she wakes up at all."

Emily put a hand on Micah's back. "She's getting the best care-"

"It doesn't matter," he shook his head. "I should have been there. Or I shouldn't have made her go in the first place-"

"Look, I can't claim to know what you're going through," Emily said, "But before my Mom's tests came back clear, I felt like I might do anything-anything at all-to keep her with me just a minute longer. It just means you love her."

"I love her," Micah intoned, "so I sent her away?"

"Maybe you should bring her back," Emily interrupted.

Micah looked up, shocked, "What?"

"To Denver," Emily said. "Maybe you should bring her home."

Micah shook his head, considering. "But the flight would be so difficult for her...and her house isn't set up for-"

"As a wise surgeon once told me," Emily said lightly, "don't over-think things."

Micah smiled, remembering his attempts to calm her nerves before Emily's first cut. "Are you implying-"

"You're over-thinking," Emily teased, waving a chastising finger.

Micah laughed despite himself. He turned back to the piano and plunked out a simple tune.

Emily punched him softly on the shoulder, calling, "I can't believe you didn't tell me you could play piano!"

Micah's reaction was not what she expected. He looked at her, heartbreak written on ever line of his face. "My mom taught me," he said, dissolving into tears.

"Oh god, Micah," Emily breathed, reaching for his head and pulling it onto her shoulder. Wrapping her arms around him, her fingers in his hair, she let him cry.

...

Cassandra walked like a ghost through the hallways of the hospital, barely noticing a thing around her. The out-of-body feeling continued for several hours, and after a time she began to wonder if she had become ill.

Looking over, Cassandra saw Emily sitting in her office, and, unbidden, headed towards her.

"I need to talk to you," Cassandra said without ceremony, not sure what she was trying to accomplish.

"Hey...Cassandra..." Emily answered, glancing nervously at Cassandra as she closed the door with a soft click. If she hadn't felt so weird, she would have enjoyed Emily's look of fear as she wondered if she was about to be murdered.

"Relax, I come in peace," Cassandra said, smirking. "It's about Will."

"Yeah," Emily said, indicating that this was obvious. "That's kinda what's freaking me out."

Cassandra rolled her eyes. "You think I'm still jealous about that?"

Emily swallowed, "You were?" She asked. "Wait, you aren't?"

Cassandra took a step closer, pushing her hair behind her ear. "I can't believe I'm about to say this...but I've made a lot of mistakes when it comes to you and...and I'm sorry." She thought about what to reveal and decided to go ahead: "I hid your beeper on our first day."

Emily pointed at her, "I knew it!"

"So sue me, it was hilarious," Cassandra said rudely. "Oh, and I rubbed your toothbrush in the toilet bowl at your birthday party."

Emily's triumphant look turned to disgust. "I used that!"

"I know, I actually feel kind of bad about that one," Cassandra said breezily. "The point is, I want to call a truce."

"You do realize what you just told me, right?" Emily asked, her tongue lolling.

"I said I was sorry," Cassandra said. Seeing that this wasn't enough, she rolled her eyes and continued, "Ugh, fine. How can I made it up to you?"

Emily looked around, suddenly excited, "Um, well I've got a mountain of paperwork to go through." She said excitedly, "Take a seat."

Cassandra eyed the mountain of paperwork disdainfully. "You've got to be kidding me."

Emily shook her head. "Toothbrush. Toilet. Sit."

Cassandra attempted to take it all back, but something still nagged at her. She nodded. "Fair enough." She looked at the stack now in front of her. "I'm sorry I was such a bitch about you being chosen as the research assistant."

"It's okay," Emily said slowly. "I would have been pretty devastated too. I wouldn't have said anything out loud, but..."

"Okay, okay, I get it," Cassandra stopped her. She ruffled through a few pages distractedly, then blurted, "So, listen, I'm worried about Will."

'Why?" Emily asked, opening a new folder. "He seems okay."

"He's thinking about leaving to start his own practice," Cassandra said. Saying it out loud made it seem more real.

"Leaving...the internship?" Emily asked, frowning. "He should at least finish his residency...Wait, are you sure that's what he was talking about?"

"I think so," Cassandra whined. "I mean, he said that things weren't going well for him here, with the hospital or...with me. He was just trying to make me feel guilty, right? He wouldn't actually leave?"

Emily considered what she knew about her friend. "I don't know. Once Will gets it in his mind to do something, he tends to go for it." She gestured towards Cassandra, "Present company included."

"Watch it, this is a tenuous truce at best," she warned.

Emily said, "All I'm saying is that he could be very serious."

Cassandra tapped her foot loudly on the polished floor. "Would you talk to him? You're still friends, right?"

"Sure I'll talk to him," Emily said doubtfully, "but don't you think you should?"

"Why?" Cassandra asked, shooting her a look.

"It clearly upsets you," Emily said, giving her a pointed glance. Cassandra realized that she'd been biting her nails.

Sheepishly, she lowered her hand. "I haven't done that since I was in middle school." Cassandra said suddenly, "I don't want to date Will."

"Why not?" Emily asked curiously.

"Because I don't, alright?" Cassandra insisted. "I feel like I'm finally getting over him. Why would I want to dive into that mess again?"

Emily shrugged. "You're both different people now. You've both...seen what insecurity can lead to..." She sighed, grabbing another folder. "I don't know, but think about it: why are you so upset?"

Cassandra sneered. "You're a surgeon, not a psychologist. Just talk to him, okay?" Not waiting for an answer to the command, she picked up a folder and changed the subject, "Now do you organize these by the prognosis or the patient's name?"

"Both," Emily explained. "We're separating it by procedure and then alphabetically from there."

Cassandra joined the work and tried to lose herself in it, but her mind still floated several feet above her body.

...

Micah tried to call his sister for the fiftieth time that day and felt no small degree of shock when she finally picked up. "Liz! Finally!" He shouted at her. "What happened?"

"It's okay," Liz's voice replied. "Mom's awake."

Micah breathed out, not realizing that he'd been holding his breath. "How is she?"

"I don't know, I haven't seen her yet," Liz answered, on the edge of tears. "They said it was a really minor stroke. I mean, they said that was good. Is that good, micah? How am I supposed to know what that means?"

"It means it could have been a lot worse," Micah told her. "Calm down Liz. I need you to start from the beginning. Do you have a concussion?"

"No, I'm fine," Liz said dismissively. "Don't worry about me. I just over-did it, okay?"

Micah felt like the floor fell from under him. "You over-did it? What did you do?"

"Nothing!" Liz cried. "God, Micah, butt out!"

"What did you do, Liz?" Micah yelled.

"Ugh," Liz sighed, "I made myself fall so I had an excuse to lose the baby. Okay? You happy now?"

"Liz!" Micah shouted. "What were you thinking?"

"Well I had to do something," Liz yelled. "Mom kept wondering why she couldn't feel it kicking. She didn't think I was getting big enough. I mean, I'm eating as much as I can, Micah!"

"So you fell down the stairs?" Micah cried. "Liz, you could have broken your neck!"

"Yeah, I didn't mean to really fall," Liz said, as though it was obvious. "I've never done it before, you know? I thought I would just get a few bruises." She said harshly, "Stop worrying about me, already. Mom had a freaking stroke!"

"Okay, look," Micah said, trying to gather his thoughts, "I'm going to come up there and-"

"No, Micah, no!" Liz cried. "No more medications! She's so exhausted."

"I was going to say that I want to bring her home," Micah continued.

Liz became silent. "But...but what about the trial?"

Micah sighed, preparing himself to admit what he hadn't yet been able to. "I've spoken to the doctors...she's not responding to the treatment." Pinching at his eyes, he repeated, "I...I want to bring her home."

"So...there's no hope?" Liz said through tears. "She's just going to die?"

"She was always going to die," Micah let himself admit. "I just didn't want to accept it."

"How can you say that?" Liz sobbed. "Do you hear yourself?"

"Liz, I don't want her to suffer far away from home, okay?" Micah said, trying to be strong. "We're going to take are of her. I'm going to come as soon as I can. It's going to be okay, Liz. Okay?

"Okay," Liz said, sounding unsteady. "Okay."

...

"I heard you were thinking of leaving?" Emily asked, walking up to Will on their way to see a patient.

"Cassandra told you?" Will asked.

"She shouldn't have had to," Emily scolded. "Are you keeping things from me now?"

'No, no of course not," Will said wistfully. "I just hadn't seen you yet and, well her reaction was so negative, I wasn't sure I wanted to discuss it further..."

"You okay?" Emily asked.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm fine," Will said unconvincingly. "Except that, you know, I'm in the middle of the pack surgical interns and I seem to be permanently single in the wreckage of an unwanted love triangle."

Emily blanched, feeling guilty. "I...I didn't know-"

"I'm not blaming you, Emily," Will said quickly. "I know that people can't deny their hearts. But I still...it's kind of appealing to think about starting over."

"Is it appealing because it's what you want," Emily asked carefully, "or because it's the path of least resistance?"

Will smiled. "There you go again, trying to get to the root of the issue..." He stopped walking and explained, "I was listening to this guy talk about his practice and how deeply he got involved in people's lives. It sounded so simple-so nice. Would it really be such a bad thing?"

Emily tried to listen to him objectively, putting aside her fear that she wouldn't get to have him in her life anymore. "People leave these internships for all kinds of reasons. Ultimately, all you can do is follow your heart."

"That's what I'm thinking, right?" Will said. "I mean, Denver Memorial is not the only place to study and practice medicine."

"No," she agreed sadly, "No, I suppose not."

Emily felt a body rush past her and saw Cassandra racing down the hall away from them. She wondered if Cassandra had been listening to them.

...

"I need you to fill in for me," Micah said, coming up to AJ.

"Why, you got a hot date?" AJ teased.

Micah smirked. "Not exactly. I need to go to Minnesota for a couple days."

"Minnesota?" Asked AJ, becoming serious. "Is Mama Barnes okay?"

"No offense," Micah said, "but I don't want to talk about it. Can you fill in while I'm gone?"

"Yeah, dude. Of course," AJ agreed. "When do you head out?"

"I couldn't get a flight until midday tomorrow," Micah said, looking at his watch. "So I'm going to finish off this shift."

"Yeah, sure thing," AJ nodded. He tried to lighten the mood. "But hey, I thought you finally gotten freaky with Dr. Owens."

"I'm a little preoccupied, in case you haven't noticed," Micah replied. "I don't need extra pressure from you.'

"Hey, come on," AJ said, "you know I only kid because I care."

"Funny way to show it," Micah said disapprovingly. "Alright, Mrs. Patterson in 255 is going in for-"

AJ held up his hands. "Come on, I got this. Go take care of your mom."

...

"I don't want to go out with you," Cassandra called down the hallway.

Will, at the other end, turned around. "Um, I didn't say anything..."

"I don't want to say that we're dating," Cassandra continued, steadily covering the distance between them, "and I don't want you to sleep over at my place."

Will scratched at his brow awkwardly. "Yeah, I've actually figured that out already..."

"I don't think you should go," Cassandra said, stopping in place. "I know you think I'm saying this because I'm blindly ambitious, but I really, really believe that you would be making a huge mistake."

"Cassandra," Will sighed, "I've barely even thought about it-"

"Well, just stop," she commanded.

Will sniffed, feeling angry. "Hey, look, you've made it clear that you don't want to be in any place that might affect my life, so I don't see how you can justify making demands of me."

Without warning, Casandra rushed the remaining distance. Reaching up, she placed both hands on his head, and pulled it down to hers, locking their lips together. Will's heart beat rapidly as the kiss continued, and his arms traveled over her back.

She pulled away, looking at him nervously to see his reaction.

"I thought you said..." Will began.

"I don't want to date you," Cassandra repeated. "I want to be with you, Will. I want us to live together. I want something serious."

Will's grip on her loosened. "Cassandra, I..."

"Don't say anything," Cassandra said, backing away. "Please don't say anything. I don't think I could handle your rejection-"

As quickly as she had, Will reached over and scooped Cassandra from the floor, locking his lips on hers once more. "I can't tell you how long I've been waiting for you to say that."

She looked up at him with teary eyes. "Really?"

"Really," Will said. He smiled broadly at her and she smiled back. Without further words, he carried her away down the hall.


	21. Chapter 21

Episode 21

"Is this okay?" Micah asked, searching the closet for spare bedding. "I can get another pillow..."

"Stop fussing," Joyce called to him from the other room. "It's making me nervous."

Micah popped his head into her room, his arms laden with blankets. "I just want to make sure you're comfortable."

"I'm comfortable," Joyce said. "The pills you smuggled for me are very good."

"Mom, I'm a doctor, this is my job," Micah whined. "Stop making me sound like your dealer."

"Yeah, he's too uptight to be a dealer," said Liz, entering with a potted lily.

"I'm not giving you pain killers," Micah told his sister.

"Why not?" Liz cried. "I'm having head aches!"

"Maybe you shouldn't have fallen down the stairs," Micah said without thinking. Liz grew quiet and they both tried and failed to avoid their mother's eyes.

"Alright," Joyce sighed, "clearly we need to talk about it."

"Need? No," Liz said evasively. She put the plant down on the bed side table. "Look, I got your favorite."

Joyce patted her daughter's arm. "Sit down, honey."

Liz sat reluctantly and launched into an apology, "Mom, I'm so sorry. I just..."

"It scared us," Micah jumped in, "that you had come to peace with this before we had."

"Hey, speak for yourself," Liz argued for the sake of arguing. "I am not at peace with this."

"Liz, this isn't helping," Micah took up the spat. "Can you just be supportive for once?"

"Enough, you two!" Joyce commanded. "I thought a lot about it on the flight back," she gave them both a measured look, "and I forgive you. BOTH of you."

"But Mom-" Liz began.

"Every mother should have children who love her so much," Joyce pushed on. "I understand why you did it...and maybe...maybe I'm not being as sensitive about your feelings as I should be."

Micah and Liz looked at each other silently for several moments, then Liz rolled her eyes. "Are you serious? You're going through all this and you're worried about us?"

"Mom," Micah said, "It would mean the world to me...to us...if you'd let us take care of you for a change. Just name it, and it's done. Okay?"

"Oh, you don't mean that," Joyce said with a wicked grin.

"You want a bet?" Liz challenged. "I know people."

"Alright...so if you want someone killed: doable," Micah teased. "How about something you'd actually want?"

"Um, let's see..." Joyce said thoughtfully. "Salmon filet. Grilled asparagus. Ooh, baked potato." She looked at Liz in excitement, "And red velvet cake!" She practically purred at the thought. "I'm drooling already."

"You got it!" Micah said. "I'll pick up some things after shift and-"

"I still can't believe you're going to work," Liz complained, sitting back.

"What am I supposed to do?" Micah asked.

"Um, I don't know," Liz said with a raised voice, "stay here with us!"

"Liz, he has to go save lives," Joyce said soothingly.

"But this time is supposed to be about you," Liz whined. She looked at her brother. "There are other doctors, you don't have to go."

"I want him to go," Joyce said to Liz. She turned to her son, "I want you to go. I'm so proud of you." Seeing Liz's dirty look, she addressed her daughter, "Oh, don't look at me like that! It's hard being a doctor, why shouldn't I be proud of him?"

Liz crossed her arms, but nodded. "I'm proud too," she said. She waved an arm, "Fine, go. I'll hold down the fort. Besides, if I'm going to make a cake, I need full run of the kitchen." She turned a warning finger at her mother, "No back-seat bakers!"

...

"Look, here's one," said Cassandra, pointing to a classified ad for an apartment. "Two bed, one bath. Easy commute. Aw, look, it's cute. Don't you think it's cute?"

The ad was shoved in Will's face and he hesitated. "Yeah, yeah it's, uh, it's cute. Hey, don't you think it's a bit soon?"

Cassandra's eyes shot daggers. "We talked about this. We talked about how we need to start over-not in your space or my space, but OUR space. If you weren't willing to-"

Will held up his hands defensively. "No, I'm not saying that, okay? I don't have cold feet. That doesn't mean this has to happen in the next few weeks. We don't want to rush into anything."

"I'm not rushing, Will. I'm looking," Cassandra said coldly. "That's what you do when you're in the market for something, you look at what's out there."

"Okay, well," Will said, taking the ad section and examining it. He pointed at one. "What about this one?"

"The three bedroom?"Cassandra asked, taking the paper back. She shook her head, "No."

"No? Just...no?" Will asked, upset. "You barely looked at it."

"I looked at it," Cassandra insisted. "It's dark. And old."

"Well, maybe the picture doesn't do it justice," Will pushed.

"Ooh, what about this one?" Cassandra said, ignoring him. "It's a studio, but it's pretty large-"

"No, I'm serious," Will insisted. "You haven't given this one a chance. Look at the exposed brick. It's super cool."

"Yeah, for a dude," Cassandra retorted.

Will's jaw worked. "Well, I don't know why you're asking for my opinion if you don't intend to listen to me." He got up, "Maybe you should do it by yourself."

...

"I think the nurse made a mistake," Emily said with a frown, examining her patient's chart. "What year were you born?"

"No mistake," the old-looking Mr. Peters said ruefully. "I'm sixty-four."

"Oh," she said, surprised. "I'm...I'm sorry, I don't mean to be surprised."

"I look a lot older, I know," he said kindly. "A long life of bad choices."

Emily grinned at his honestly. "Hopefully a few good ones too."

"Well, my kids are pretty great," he said, smiling back. Then he signed. "They don't talk to me, though."

Emily frowned, setting down his chart. "That's too bad."

"No, no. I deserve it," Mr. Peters said solemnly. "I was never there for them, so what could I expect, right? That's why I'm back in town actually. Thought I'd give it another go now that I'm sober."

"Well, that's great," Emily said. "For how long?"

"Two years, nearly," Mr. Peters said.

"Well, I don't want to get your hopes up," Emily said, "but if it was me, I'd forgive you. I think everyone deserves a second chance."

Mr. Peters smiled broadly and Emily could see that several teeth were missing from his blackened gums. "That's real sweet, darling. Thanks for saying that."

"It's the least I can do!" She said, shaking off the vision. "In fact, I'm pretty sure you're here for something else. Your leg's been hurting."

...

Tyra heard a harsh voice in the hallway and backtracked to see the source. I was Will talking into his phone, and he seemed upset.

"No, I heard you before, but..." he was saying. "I realize it's an inconvenience, but I want to make sure it happens today. She's getting crazy, and if I don't...No, wait, don't put me n hold again...ugh!"

"Ugh," Tyra agreed, walking up to meet him.

"Hey, sorry," Will said, dropping his phone into his pocket. "It's just...this project that I've been working on."

Tyra lifts her eyebrows and observed, "You seem stressed. Hospital stuff or life stuff?"

"Um, you know," Will hedged. "Just life stuff, I guess."

"Yeah, how's that going?" Tyra asked, suspicious of his behavior.

"Oh, hey," Will waved away her attention. "I don't want to bore you."

"Bore me?" Tyra repeated, her eyes growing wide. "Wow, no one's ever worried about that before. Hey, I pretended I was interested, didn't I?"

Will laughed. "No, I...it's Cassandra." He admitted, "I'm totally on board with this moving-in-together thing, but she's been acting like my opinion doesn't matter."

"Not seeing what any of this has to do with your cryptic phone call," Tyra said, shaking her head.

"Oh, that's just..." he said vaguely, "don't worry about that."

Tyra frowned. "Okay..." she said, "um, hey, Will, are you on drugs?"

This got his attention. "What? No!"

"Cause you're acting really secretive," Tyra finished.

"Dr. Collins, you coming?" Called a nurse from behind them.

Seeing that his patient was going in for tests, Will pointed to Tyra. "It's sweet of you to worry, but I got this under control."

...

"We were in Reno at the time, for a show," Mr. Peters was saying. Emily listened, only vaguely aware that she was neglecting her work. He continued, "We'd done our first gig and the other one wasn't until the next day, so we across the street where there was this group playing called Procol Harum. Now those guys could light up a room! We stayed and listened to them and then after the show we paid our respects. The next night they invited us to jam afterwards, which was cool, because they had a killer organ they let me play."

"That's so crazy-" Emily breathed.

"That's not even the best part!" Mr. Peters called. "Me and Tommy, the guitarist, we worked on this song we thought they'd like, we called it 'Marionette.' Next time we saw them, we jammed on it, and sure enough, they used it on their album!"

"I can't believe you jammed with Procol Harum," Emily said, in awe.

"I can't believe you're heard of Procol Harum," Mr. Peters said fondly. "But that's not even the best part-let me tell you about when we jammed with Hendrix."

Emily's jaw dropped, "As in Jimi-"

"You better believe it, sweetie," Mr. Peters said proudly. "We were-"

"What's going on?" Micah's voice asked, recalling Emily to herself.

"Oh, sorry!" She said, jumping up and grabbing his case file. "I didn't mean to get distracted, but Mr. Peters was just telling me about-"

"What the hell are you doing here?" Micah asked him coldly.

"Micah!" Emily cried.

Mr. Peters didn't look surprised, however. "Well, I expected as much."

"You can't just talk to our patients like that-" Emily said, shocked.

"Emily, this is Marcus Peters," Micah explained. "He's my father." With a unpleasant curl of his lip and without another word, Micah walked out.

...

"He was livid," Emily told Tyra later. "I think all the blood drained out of his face at one point. Then he was just...gone."

"What did you do?" Tyra asked, taking a large bite of her sandwich.

"Well, I had to finish the tests," Emily said. "I wanted to run after him. I just...his Dad seems nice. I get that drug addiction was probably really hard to deal with and he that did walk out on them, but he seemed worthy of pity, not hatred. I just don't understand Micah's reaction."

"Does seem a bit extreme-" Tyra said thoughtfully.

"Right?" Emily seemed glad to find that others agreed. "I mean, I'd give anything to have known my father. Here is his, and he just..walks away."

"Are you talking about Will?" Cassandra asked, dropped her lunch unceremoniously on the table.

"What?" Tyra asked, "No, why?"

"Oh, sorry," she said harshly, "I thought you said someone was walking away."

"Cassandra..." Emily asked, "is there something you want to say?"

"No!" She cried. "Yes! It hasn't even been a week-not even a whole WEEK-and Will is already backing out." She tore at her bag. "I should have known."

"Should have known what?" Tyra said, thinking back to her encounter with Will.

"That this was all a mistake!" Cassandra explained. "I can't count on him. I mean, knew that, but still, I let this whole mess into my life again."

"Were you wanting an apple or just apple sauce?" Tyra asked, motioning to Cassandra's hand, which was then squeezing said fruit.

Setting down the apple, Cassandra took a deep breath. "Ugh, change the subject, please?"

Tyra didn't have to be told twice. "I'm thinking about putting my name in for the tracheotomy, what about you?"

...

"Hey, you!" Called Liz's voice in the parking lot. Emily turned around, her eyes growing wide. Liz took a puff from her cigarette and her look softened, "Yeah, sorry, Emily. I've been looking for you."

Emily looked around nervously. "Um, why?"

"Don't ask me," Liz shrugged, adjusting her shoulder strap. "For reasons I won't pretend to understand, my mom wants to see you again. You in?"

Emily's fear lifted somewhat. "Oh, well that'd be nice-"

"Yeah, yeah," Liz said cynically. "Just glad to get out of the house."

"Right," Emily nodded. "I bet that's been tough for you. You know, I always like to go to-"

"Whatever," Liz interrupted. She flicked her cigarette to the ground. "Is he here?"

"Is who here?" Emily asked, thinking that she could have just called Micah.

"Daddy Deserts-a-lot," Liz said. "Is he, uh, lurking somewhere around here?"

"In the parking lot? No," Emily said vaguely. "Different floor, actually."

"I was kind of hoping to see the bastard," Liz said, still looking around. "I wouldn't mind giving him a piece of my mind. Or my fist."

Emily felt sad to hear that Liz had the same deeply-seated hatred as her brother. "He can't have been that bad. "

Liz stared at her for a moment, and then threw he head back in laughter. "That's cute. Not that bad," she gagged. Then, all of a sudden very serious, Liz added, "My mom showed me my baby clothes once, they were covered with cigarette burns, because when he was strung out on Heroin he would fall asleep and drop whatever was in his hands."

"No, I know that drug addiction can be really terrible," Emily offered, "but he's clean now."

"Oh, he's clean?" Liz cried. "The kind of clean where he mixes prescription medications with alcohol or the kind where he puts his parents in a nursing home and steals their money to buy heroin?"

"Liz," Micah said in greeting, coming upon them. "I thought I heard your voice on the other side of the hospital."

"Yeah, well, I have some aggression to work out," Liz said with a sneer. "I can't believe Dad had the balls to show up here."

"Don't worry," Micah said coldly. "If we ignore him, he'll go away."

"Okay, obviously I don't know what I'm talking about," Emily interjected, "but don't you think you're being a little harsh?"

"Don't you think you're being a little blonde?" Liz retorted.

"Liz," Micah warned.

"Why is she taking his side?" Liz asked her brother.

"I'm not..." Emily said for herself. "I'm not taking sides. I just...Don't you think people deserve a second chance? Why did he show up out of the blue if he didn't want to see you?"

"Um, I don't know," Liz cried, "because my mother is dying and this is his last chance to get in her will?"

Emily blanched, "I just don't think you can assume that-"

"I can, actually," she insisted. "Because it's always the same."

"What Liz means is-" Micah attempted.

"I can speak for myself!" Liz yelled. She turned to Emily, who cringed. "Fine, come by or whatever. I'm out of here."

"Micah..." Emily said, after watching Liz's departure, "I get that he hurt you, but if he's sober now, maybe he really does want a second chance. Don't you think people deserve that much?"

"People, yes. PEOPLE deserve a second chance," Micah answered, clearly upset. "What I won't give them is a five-hundred-and-second chance. I really do think that at some point you can give up on people."

Emily shook her head. "I can't believe that."

"I'm no asking you to," Micah said. "But don't meddle. Stay away from him."

...

"Why am I blindfolded?" Cassandra asked as Will guided her from his car. "Is this some weird sex thing?"

"Hey, mind out of the gutter," Will chided. "It's Because I have a surprise for you."

"Really?" Cassandra blurted.

"You don't need to sound so surprised," Will defended himself. "You know, in some circles I'm considered a pretty thoughtful guy." He slowed her pace and gave the instructions, "Okay, watch for these stairs."

"Stairs?" Cassandra cried, finding herself ascending a flight of steps. "Where are you taking me?"

"If I told you it wouldn't be a surprise," Will said, a grin on his voice.

"On no!" Cassandra stopped, her heart dropping. "Do not tell me you signed a lease to that hideous three bedroom!"

"Hideous!" Will called back, sounding offended. He pulled her reluctantly up the rest of the stairs. "Come on, it's just a little bit of a fixer-upper."

"You didn't!" Cassandra whined, already thinking about how to get out of it.

"No," Will said, pulling off her blindfold, "I signed a lease to this one."

I wasn't the dark three bedroom at all-it was light and open and clean. "Oh my god! Will! It's beautiful!" She called, running off to look at the two small but light-filled bedrooms.

"I talked to the broker before anyone could list it," Will explained, jingling the keys.

"How much is it?" Cassandra asked, suddenly worried that it was too good to be true.

"At the top of our range," Will said soothingly, "but definitely in that range."

Cassandra returned to him for a hug. "You didn't have to do this."

Will shrugged. "I wanted to. I know you like to stress out about things, so I wanted to prove to you that I could do my part. It's okay, right?"

"It's amazing!" Cassandra replied.

"So..."

"So?"

"So...I did good?" Will asked. He was so earnest, and Cassandra realized that she had, indeed, been discounting his help.

"You did good." she said honestly. They embraced again, but then Cassandra pulled away, "oh my god there's a balcony!"

...

"What are you still doing here?" Asked the nurse in a friendly voice. "Wasn't your shift done hours ago?"

"Yes, but I'm still catching up on the hours missed," Emily explained. "A little at a time, right?"

Nurse Lina smiled. "Smart girl."

"Uh, thanks," Emily said, blushing despite herself. "Oh, so I was just in room 405 and my patient wasn't there. Mr. Peters? Has he been moved?"

"The addict? You better believe it," Nurse Linda said. "His tox screen came back and...well, we had thought he'd be best in another ward."

"His tox screen?" Emily asked, her heart beating faster. "Why? He said he was sober."

"Is he saying that?" Nurse Linda said sadly, "Well, science says differently. That man is on some serious drugs."

Emily's voice sounded far away when she asked fearfully, "What is he on?"

"You want me to start with the stuff that's illegal?" Nurse Linda asked, "Or narrow it down to the things that could kill him instantly?"

"Um, no," Emily said to stop her. She found herself filled with guilt at how she had spoken to Micah and Liz. "That's okay."

"Don't be offended that they handed him off," Linda said, reading Emily's guilt as professional disapproval. "You don't want the addicts if you can help it. You never know what they'll react to."

"Um, right. No, right, of course not," Emily stammered, unable to string a thought together. She looked at her watch, "Ah, look, seven o'clock, I'm free!"

They wished each other a good night and Emily headed for the roof. Pulling out her phone, she dialed Micah's number, but he didn't pick up. After the beep, she said hurriedly, "I know it almost makes things worse that it took your dad's tox screens to convince me that you were right...but, you were right. I'm so sorry, Micah. Please call me when you can. It really would be nice to see Joyce again. So, um, yeah. Call me."

...

"I don't think you were more than, I don't know, three feet tall?" Joyce considered. "It was just the sweetest thing..."

"Mom..." Micah begged.

"Oh, don't hush me," Joyce said with a mischievous grin. "If I can't tell all your most embarrassing stories now, when can I tell them?"

"Never," Micah said, laughing despite his words. "I was kinda hoping never."

"Alright," Liz piped up, tired of watching this play out, "it's settled: I have to hear this."

"Liz," Micah begged, "don't encourage her!"

"You, shh!" She scolded. Pointing at her mother, Liz said, "You, go."

Joyce set aside her dinner and started to speak animatedly. "There was this girl he liked, I think her name was, oh what was it?" She looked at Micah for the forgotten details.

"Don't look at me," Micah said, taking a bike of his potato. "This is being done without my approval."

"Amber!" Joyce remembered. "It was Amber. She was a cute little thing. Wasn't she cute?"

"Yes, mom," Micah admitted. "She was cute."

"Oh, you had such a crush on her!" Joyce said, patting his hand. "Anyway, he got it in his head that he wanted to give her flowers..."

"No, no!" Micah corrected, "There was a radio ad about a flower company-"

"That's right!" She cried, remembering fondly, "That's right. 'If you want to get to her heart, get there with Tate's Flower Mart!'" Joyce sang.

Liz made a face of disgust, "This is going to get interesting soon right?"

Micah explained, "She's trying to set up the fact that I didn't realize they meant flowers...I had just started helping mom do some baking-"

"You were such a good little helper," Joyce said.

"-and I thought they meant a bag of flour."

"Oh, oh mouse," Liz looked at him with pity. "That is so...sad. That's just sad!"

"You know the worst part, though?" Micah cried, pointing at his mother, "She didn't correct me! Talk about sad! She let me spent my allowance on a bag of flour!"

"It was too cute," Joyce shrugged merrily. "I couldn't help myself."

"So, I take this bag of flour to school," Micah said, taking over the story, "and I'm walking to give it to her-"

"And he trips!" Joyce roared.

"-and I trip..." Micah confirmed. "And the bag opens and shoots all over this poor girl."

"All over!" Joyce agreed. "It was everywhere! Like a bomb had gone off."

"Needless to say," Micah pushed on, "she never spoke to me again. And they gave me a week of detention, which was put on my permanent record."

"Oh no!" Joyce teased in high laughter. "You'll never get into college now!"

At this, even Micah laughed loudly. When they had gathered their breathes, Joyce took back her plate and stabbed her fork through the last piece of salmon, asparagus, and potato left upon it, constructing the perfect final bite. She chewed happily, looking at her children with love.

Embarrassed but pleased, Micah pointed out, "You know, I don't think I've ever made all three things perfectly for the same meal before. Either I've gotten really lucky or I've missed my calling as a chef."

Liz, breaking up, said, "Maybe you should be a flower delivery boy."

Joyce giggled too, hitting her daughter playfully on the arm.

Micah finished up too and looked at his plate sadly. "Didn't someone say something about a cake?"

"It's in the oven," Liz said, taking a bite. As though planned, the fire alarm in the kitchen blared. Liz's eyes grew wide, "Oh shit, the cake!" She tore from the room. There was banging and then a waft of smoke greeted their noses.

Micah took a page out of his sister's book and rolled his eyes. He and his mother shared a patient smile. Getting up, he went to the kitchen, where he found his sister fanning away smoke and cursing.

"Damn it! Damn it, damn it!" She cried as Micah turned off the smoke detector. He coughed and helped in her fanning, seeing a blackened cake pan emerge from the smoke.

"I'm not sure frosting will fix that," Micah teased.

"Shut up, Micah!" Liz yelled. "Don't say anything. I forgot to set the timer, okay? Damn it! This was supposed to be perfect!"

Liz reached for the hot pan and Micah stopped her. "Hey, it's okay. We can do it again."

"No we can't!" Liz cried. "I used up all the flour."

"Then I'll go get some," Micah offered. "Actually, that would be good. I'll pick up Emily on my way back. She can help." With an encouraging look at her, Micah walked back to their mother, "I told you this one would burn the house down."

"Ha, ha," Liz complained, coming in after him. "Standing right here."

"Look, we can bring this around," Micah said enthusiastically. "Twenty minutes, I'll have baking supplies and company."

"You two are the best," Joyce said, sharing his excitement. "Hurry back."

Micah nodded, grabbing his wallet. He went to the door, and then thought to turn back. "I love you, Mom."

She blew him a kiss. "I love you too, Mouse."

...

Emily opened her apartment door to find a smiling Micah holding a bag of flour.

Smiling herself, she said, "Um, hey?"

"You wouldn't understand the reference," Micah said, "mostly because I'm not telling-but I'm feeling pretty suave right now."

Tyra, from inside, called, "Flour. I get it."

Micah's smile faltered, but he waved a hello at Emily's roommate anyway. "It's for a second try at a cake," he explained. "One that, I was hoping, you could help me with."

"I would be honored," Emily said, hoping to apologize first. "You want a beer first?"

Micah set the flour down, looking relieved at the offer. "I would love one, actually."

"Me too," Tyra ordered. "Thanks!"

Micah smiled at the roommate, sitting awkwardly on the couch. Emily handed him a beer, then offered one to Tyra, sharing a pointed look. "So that thing with the person fell through?"

"Yeah," Tyra said, not taking the hint.

"What about that other thing?" Emily tried again.

"Nope," Tyra smiled, choosing not to give them privacy. "Just...enjoying my beer."

Emily realized that, despite the standing invitation and her roommate's presence, she still wanted to apologize to Micah before anything else was said. "I'm so sorry about earlier," she said. "I have no right to assume that I know better about your family than you-"

"No, I get it," Micah said, more generously than earlier. "I think it's good that you believe in second chances. I do too, with one exception. I just, I was worried that he might, you know, try to see my mom."

"That would suck," Tyra offered.

"Yeah," Micah agreed, chugging half his bottle. He looked at Emily, "I'm glad you called, anyway. I was cooking, so I didn't hear my phone and I only listened to your message before we were eating."

"Wait?" Emily stopped him, "you can cook too?"

Micah blushed, taking another swig from his beer. He felt his phone vibrate and saw that Liz was calling him. He excused himself to another room and answered.

"He can cook!" Emily repeated to Tyra.

"And you thought Will was perfect," Tyra said in agreement. "I think you should do it tonight."

"Do what?" Emily asked.

"It," Tyra repeated. "What, do I have to draw you a diagram?"

"Tyra!" Emily cried, "we're going to go make a cake for his mom."

"That's got to be code for something," Tyra said.

They were interrupted by Micah's shout. "Why didn't you call me immediately?" Their heads swiveled around.

"You shouldn't have been cleaning out the oven, you should have been with her! Who's there? What do you mean they left? No, she should have gone in the ambulance-"

Tyra averted her eyes, uncomfortable. Emily could tear hers away. She could practically hear Liz's yelling on the other line when Micah's hand dropped his phone. It clattered to the floor, emitting loud squawks. Emily stood quickly, her face ashen, and an equally pale Micah turned to her.

"No," Emily begged. "Please, no."

"She's dead," Micah said in shock. "She's gone."


	22. Chapter 22

Episode 22

Beginning note: the show creator said there were going to be 22 episodes, so, in keeping with that, here we find ourselves at the finale. I got the impression, however, that Joyce's death was going to be a cliff-hanger for Season 2, whereas I wanted to achieve a little more closure.

...

With great precision, Emily used her scalpel to puncture the patient's skin, then drew it along, cutting cleanly. Bandari nodded her approval and encouraged Emily to continue.

"I was sorry to miss the wake," Dr. Bandari said as Emily worked. "I heard there was some trouble."

"Not trouble so much as an unwelcome guest," Emily recalled, her concentration focused.

"The man's who's been lurking around the hospital," Bandari stated. "What, is that his father?"

"Yeah, they're not close, though," Emily answered.

"Clamp," demanded Gina. One was placed in her hand. She spoke again, "So, when is Dr. Barnes coming back?"

Emily looked up, surprised, "I thought you knew."

Bandari's eyes rolled. "You'd think," she said tersely. "Except that he's not taking my calls." Gina sighed, "If it was anyone else or for any other reason, he would have been fired. Perhaps you should tell him that."

"I can't!" Emily said, feeling panicky. "He's not taking my calls either."

"Damn," Bandari cursed. "I thought that was a sure thing."

Emily worked in silence for a moment, then asked in what she hoped was a casual voice, "Why, um, why would you think that?"

Bandari's eyes narrowed. "I've aced every test I've ever taken, Dr. Owens. Don't insult my intelligence."

"No, I didn't mean..." Emily realized how stupid her question had been. "I just...I didn't think you cared enough to notice."

"Dr. Barnes is important to me," Gina said with an air of finality. She sighed thoughtfully. "So he's out of reach to the world? Well, he's running out of time."

Emily could tell she had been brought to the OR in order to hear this. She had been given a task.

...

Micah woke with a start to find himself on his mother's couch where, so it appeared, he had fallen asleep the night before. He realized in the next moment that he had been woken by a harsh banging. There was a rattle of keys and the sound of a door opening. Then, his sister cursed.

"Ow, Micah!" She yelled, her toe having just run into a heavy container. "What the hell are these boxes doing here? Micah!"

Micah shielded his eyes from the sunlight that was pouring in. "Stop yelling!" He yelled. "What are you doing here?"

"Are you kidding me? It's the middle of the day." She said, appearing at the doorway. Her eyes raked his disheveled hair and clothes. She looked away as he smoothed himself out. "I went to see Oliver this morning," she continued. "I thought maybe he'd want to give it another try."

"Oh," said Micah, trying to sound interested. "How'd that go?"

"It sucked!" Liz said, throwing herself in an armchair. "The bastard's seeing somebody. I'm thinking about stalking her. I mean, what right does he have to move on so quickly?"

"Yeah, don't do that," Micah suggested. "How did you leave it with him?"

"I don't know," Liz shrugged. "Mom called, so I packed up and left."

"You didn't talk to him?" Micah asked.

"No, what was I supposed to say?" Liz inquired, snappish.

Micah opened his mouth in disbelief. "I don't know, maybe that you're going somewhere but that you'll be back?" He threw himself back on the couch.

"What are you still doing here?" Liz asked, eager for a new subject.

"According to the Will," Micah said matter-of-factly, "I own this now. Or, we do."

"Oh god, those boxes weren't you moving in, were they?" Liz asked with a leer. "That's so gross."

"No, they're not," Micah answered defensively. "And I don't know what I'm doing with it yet. I mean, it's paid off after all."

"Sell my half," Liz directed.

"Sell it?" Micah asked, amazed. "Liz, we grew up here."

"No, we grew up in a lot of places," Liz corrected. "That's just part of having a drug-addict father who steals all your money. This place was just the last."

"All the same," Micah said with a shrug, "it's paid for."

"Don't live in Mom's tomb, Micah," Liz begged.

"I think that's being a little melodramatic," was his reply. Changing the subject, Micah said, "I can order some pizza if you're hungry. I think I still have some beer."

"You can't drink before your shift," Liz observed.

"What shift?" Micah said. "I'm off this week."

Liz looked at him, her head cocked. "You were off last week. And the week before. And the week before the week before-"

She was silenced when Micah's phone rang. Looking to see who it was, she managed to read Emily's name before he hit Decline.

Pretending she hadn't seen, Liz asked, "How's Blondie doing?"

"Um, I don't know," Micah said distractedly, stuffing the phone into his pocket. "I'm sure she's fine."

"What, you don't think the sun rises out of her ass anymore?" Liz teased roughly.

Mich shot her a look. "I just need some time, okay? There's a lot to do. I mean," he looked around, "there is a monumental amount of things to do."

"What, and I can't help?" Liz demanded.

"Would you rather go through Mom's things and decide what has little enough meaning that we can get rid of?" Micah offered. "Or talk to the lawyer about the recipients in Mom's Will? Or would you rather pour through the medical bills and decide whose inheritance gets squandered on that? Trust me, Liz, you don't want to do this."

"Screw you, I can sort through Mom's things," Liz said. "You're not the only one who can assign meaning to her stuff-"

"Or maybe you want to scrub the burned cake out of the oven," Micah heard himself say, "like you were doing when you didn't notice that she had stopped breathing-"

The room became silent very suddenly. Liz said shakily, "I can't believe you would say that to me."

Micah, in horror, replied, "I didn't mean it."

"Yes you did!" Liz cried. "Oh my god, you blame me? Is that why you aren't answering your phone?" She added, in hysterics, "The paramedics said there was nothing anyone could have done-"

"There wasn't-" Micah said, trying to take it back.

"Then why would you say that?" Liz sobbed. She gathered her things and stood up. "You know what, Micah, screw you! Screw you and your pain." She stormed out, yelling, "If you wanted to honor Mom, you wouldn't be shutting the world out."

...

Emily put down her phone in frustration for the dozenth time that day.

"No answer?" Asked Tyra, watching it drop.

"No," Emily affirmed. "Bandari seemed upset. I thought all this time off he was taking was sanctioned by the hospital, but it's not. He's just...gone."

Tyra shook her head. "I can't imagine what it would be like losing my Mom. I think I'd go a little crazy."

"I know, I know," Emily whined. "It would be really hard...but we all want to help him-"

"His Mom is dead,' Tyra pointed out. "How are you supposed to help him?"

"I don't know," Emily admitted, her shoulders slumping. "I guess it's selfish-wanting him to pay attention to me when he's going through so much."

"Hey, I didn't mean you shouldn't still try to throw yourself all over him," Tyra said. "Just stop making it about his Mom."

"But he needs to-" Emily began, shocked.

"No!" Tyra stopped her. "He needs to think about living people."

"No, I know!" Emily said. "But...I knew his Mom. I liked her a lot."

"I get it," Tyra said. "And he'll talk about her when he's ready. But you can't force it."

"Okay," Emily nodded eagerly, happy to receive advice. She didn't know what to do with it, though. "So...what does that mean?"

"Let me see your phone," Tyra commanded.

Emily gripped it all the tighter. "What? No. Why?"

"Because I have a suspicion," Tyra explained. "Give it here."

Emily held it back from her friend's grasping arms. "Maybe you shouldn't be so cynical, then."

"Ugh, fine," Tyra said, pulling back. "You're no fun." Looking down to the end of the hallway, she asked suddenly, "Hey, why is Harriet here?"

"What?" Emily asked, craning her heck to see. As she did so, Tyra grabbed the now unattended phone and began scrolling through her texts. Emily cried out at the betrayal.

"Ugh, I knew it," said Tyra, tossing the phone back in disgust. "All your messages start with how sorry you are."

"Well I am," Emily said, dusting off her phone dejectedly.

"That's where to start," Tyra explained. "You falling over yourself to apologize only serves as yet another reminder that his mom is gone. He can't see you like that. You have to be the ray of sunshine at the end of the tunnel."

"Right," thought Emily, her eyes narrowing. "Ray of sunshine..."

She had never felt less like a ray of sunshine in her life.

...

"Hey, I'm Will. Can I help you?" Will asked, walking up to the oddly familiar man who paced in the lobby and offering his hand.

"Nah" the man said. "Just looking for my son. Marcus," said the man, shaking it.

"Is he in one of the rooms?" Will asked, considering his options. "I can get you to the right one. This place can be pretty confusing."

"No, no, nothing like that," Marcus said. "He works here. I just...I'm trying to catch him before he goes in."

"Wow, but I've seen you around for the last few weeks," Will said, trying not to sound too patronizing. "Have you tried just calling him?"

"Nah," Marcus said with a wave. "Don't have his number. But he'll show up."

"Are you..." Will recalled hearing, "are you Micah's dad?"

Marcus's eyes lit up. "That'll be the one. Hey, I don't suppose you've seen him?"

"No, not in a while," Will answered, becoming uncomfortable. "But I heard about you. Look, I don't mean to butt in where I don't belong...but you can't hang around here."

"I won't be no trouble," Marcus said with a wink. "I haven't been yet."

"Well, that doesn't really matter," Will continued. "You see, we're not allowed to remain silent when we...see people loitering..." he let the insinuation of actively being on drugs remain unsaid.

Marcus laughed. "You wouldn't tell on me! That's a good man." He offered Will a cigarette, which he turned down, and set one in his mouth, though he made no motion to light it.

"Um, right, no. You're not understanding me," Will tried again. "I'm trying to tell you as a courtesy that I have to call security as soon as I get inside. If you don't want to cause a scene, you might consider-"

Marcus's head snapped to look at Will, his mouth sagging in a frown. "Don't tell me what to do! Like you're some kind of authority. I want to see my son!"

"I understand that," Will said calmly, backing away. "But this is private property-"

"You think you can tell me what to do, Doc?" Marcus asked, raising himself to stand with difficulty. "He owes me. His mama owes me. You all damned well owe me!"

Will motioned to a security guard to hurry over. Within moments their were three surrounding Marcus Paters. "Follow us, sir," said one.

"I just want what's mine!" Marcus called as he was escorted out. "Why is that so hard for you to understand?"

Will watched as the yelled man passed through the doors and was out of sight. His heart raced uncomfortably.

...

Liz got Emily's attention by saying in a tone of disgust, "Ugh, this place is so depressing. I can't believe I came back here."

"Liz, hi!" Emily said, trying to stop herself from cringing. "Can I...can I help you?"

"Hey, can we get out if this place for a second?" Liz said, edging her towards the exit.

"Um, sure," Emily said, pulling back a little bit. "The roof can be pretty nice."

"Yeah, I bet," Liz said with one of her signature eye rolls. She crossed her arms and looked at the ground before saying, "Look, I came to say that I'm sorry. I think I'd flip out if someone did all that shit to me, so...you're probably pretty cool."

Emily let this sink in. "That means a lot coming from you."

"Yeah, whatever. I'm not good at this," Liz said, pushing her bag up on her shoulder. "Truth is, I need your help."

Emily's expression changed to concern. She checked Liz's fists for bruises. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. What you can't go five minutes without diagnosing someone?" Liz said resentfully, pulling back. "It's my brother, alright?"

Emily's eyes grew somewhat distant. "Well, I don't know anything about that. He hasn't been taking my calls."

"That's my point," Liz explained. "Micah would never miss work. I don't think he missed a day of school unless we forced him to. He didn't care if he made all the kids sick, so long as he could go. And now he's been away for weeks and won't talk to anyone? I've never seen him like this. It's freaking me out."

Emily looked at her seriously, "Well...what can I do?"

"I don't know," Liz threw up her arms. "Talk about...whatever it is you losers talk about."

Letting the insult pass, Emily agreed, "I want to...but, I mean, I don't even know where to find him..."

"Oh my god, are you serious? That's your excuse?" Liz grabbed Emily by the arm. "Okay, get in the car, we're going."

"Wait, I can't," Emily tried to pull back, but in vein. "I have my shift."

"I thought you wanted to help Micah," Liz asked. She stopped tugging long enough for Emily to see her dark, wide eyes full of fear and love.

Emily looked around, spotting Tyra. "Um, okay. Tyra! Tyra, fill in for me?" Emily asked. "Don't forget the man in 301, he needs-"

"Come on!" Liz pulled.

...

AJ pulled up to the Barnes house in time to see Micah loading boxes into the back of his car.

"Wow, so he is alive," AJ said with a slight whistle.

"Hey man, how goes it?" Asked Micah, pulling his friend into a solemn hug.

AJ patted Micah on the back a few times, and pulled away. "Funny, that's what we're all wondering about you."

"Yeah, look," Micah said, "I just need some time-"

"You've had some time," AJ said. "You NEED an intervention."

Micah sighed. "Please, not now, I need to-"

"Then when?" AJ demanded. "Two months from now when you've lost your job and license?"

"I'm not going to lose-"

"Oh no? Who do you think I heard it from?" AJ countered. "Gina's holding back as long as she can, but not even she-"

"And how would you know this?" Micah lashed out. "Because you're sleeping with her? Don't criticize my behavior you hypocrite!"

"Why don't I just stop you before you say something you regret?" AJ suggested. "You know what? I get it. I get that you want to push people away. I get that you're hurting. But you've got to let some people in."

"I don't want anyone to pretend to understand," Micah said, hardly aware that he had been thinking it. "I'm not looking for pity."

"It's not about pity, ass-face," AJ explained. "You think you're the only person who is sad about your mom? Has it ever occurred to you that they need to grieve WITH you?"

Micah bit his lip, looking like he wanted to argue. He changed his mind and stepped into his car. "Look, I don't have time for this."

He turned on the car and expected to have to wait for AJ to get out of his way, but his old friend had already gone. Seeing his retreating figure hurt. It felt like he was being abandoned...and like he deserved it.

...

Liz had a sneaking suspicion that her brother wouldn't be home. Neither was he at his long-neglected apartment. With a heavy heart, she turned towards the cemetery. As she and Emily pulled up to the north side, Micah's figure could be seen in the distance.

Liz stopped the car and stared, haunted at the sight of the graves. With a last look at her, Emily opened the door and walked towards her brother.

"Hey," Emily said quietly as she joined him

"Hey," Micah replied, wiping at his eyes. His words weren't upset, merely thoughtful. "What are you doing here? Is no one at work today?"

"I think retrieving the boss might be considered working..." Emily said chidingly. She pointed back at the car, where Liz was now smoking. "Your sister kidnapped me, actually. I think she's worried about you." She motioned to the bouquet of flowers she was holding and Micah noticed it for the first time. "Also, I came to pay my respects."

The flowers, or lilies, as it were, were held together by a stuffed bear, who a held a heart implying regret for a recent diagnosis. Emily placed it carefully near the head stone. "Ignore the stuff about cerebral palsy," she instructed Micah, joining him again. "Just focus on the sentiments of love."

"What cerebral palsy stuff?" Micah said, staring at the lilies fondly. "All I see is a beautiful gesture." He glanced over at her, "Tell the truth, did you steal these?"

Emily shrugged, meeting his gaze. "I don't think it counts as stealing if they were being thrown out. I rescued them." She looked to the flowers, "I can't throw out lilies."

"My mom couldn't either," said Micah thoughtfully. "They were her favorite."

Emily turned back to him, "What I meant...when I said I was sorry...it wasn't about you..." She stammered, worried that her words sounded contrived. "I mean, I like you a lot, but it was about her."

"I know," Micah said, putting her out of her misery. "I'm glad it's about her." Taking her hand, he led her to a nearby bench below a flowering tree. "Hey, come over here. go to bench. I want to apologize."

"What for?" Emily asked, keeping hold of his hand after they'd been seated. "We all understand..."

"No, I, um, I couldn't handle it," Micah explained, sounding upset with himself. "And, I'm a doctor, so I should be able to handle it..."

"No, Micah..." Emily cooed, giving his hand a squeeze.

"But anyway, I was, um, I was driving here," Micah explained, "and I thought that maybe keeping all of this to myself was being selfish. Because, you know, I think maybe grief is meant to be shared."

Emily looked impressed, "That's a profound thought to think of in the car."

Micah grinned wickedly at her, "I'm a profound guy!" He laughed at himself and added, "A surgical resident may have helped. But it's right. I know it's right because I feel guilty. I didn't mean to suggest that you couldn't grieve about my mom."

Emily squeezed his hand yet again and looked at him for permission. "Do you mind if I...?" He said nothing, so she looked up at the tree buds, "I'll never forget how you sent me flowers after my accident-"

"We can go back to the headstone-" Micah said, figuring out her purpose.

Emily stayed seated. "That's okay. I feel her right here," she said, bringing up to her heart the hand that held his. She looked away again. "I'll never forget that you sent me flowers. You had no reason to like me at the time, but you loved me anyway." Tears stung at her eyes, "and it was maybe the most thoughtful thing anyone's ever done for me. And, I will have you know, your son is pretty steep competition!" Beside her, Micah laughed and squeezed her hand. She continued, "I...will remember every moment we spent together, because you made every moment so...full. And I will always be grateful that, no matter how much pain I feel now, knowing that I won't see you again, I wouldn't trade in a single second for any shred of peace of mind. We were all so lucky. Thank you." Emily's voice cracked and she had to stop. There seemed an infinite amount of things to say, yet there were only words for a mean few.

Micah didn't say anything either. Maybe he couldn't. They sat together, hands connected, while Emily collected herself.

"I, um," Emily stammered, wiping her eyes, "I would like to take you out for a drink. I think maybe you could use one."

Micah smiled, "Oh, you have no idea."

"Is nine okay?" Emily asked, her heart light at his affirmation. "I should get back to my shift, but I can meet after."

"Wait! Just...just a few more minutes?" Micah begged. He looked up to see Liz waiting by the car. "Thanks for saying those things. It meant a lot."

"Well, it wasn't for you," Emily reminded him. "But I'm glad."

"I didn't know she'd sent you flowers," Micah said, thinking back to those days. "I called her in a panic when they brought you in-I felt so ashamed that I couldn't do the surgery..."

"I think it's sweet," Emily said." I mean, maybe I'm being really egotistical to interpret it like this, but I think maybe you couldn't do it because...you have feelings for me?"

"You know, that's what Bandari told me," Micah said. He looked to meet Emily's gaze. "I think she was right." His eyes locked on hers for several moments, then he looked away, seeming to pull back somewhat. "Can we actually hold off on the drink tonight? I'm just finishing up with a few things and I might be better company after the fact."

"I'm not worried about you being good company," Emily said, sad to see a weight fall back on his shoulders.

"Tomorrow night? Nine?" Micah squeezed her hand. "Please?"

"Of course," Emily said, not feeling it wise to push. "I can't wait."

Micah nodded and looked away, "I can't believe you stole some kid's flowers."

...

Will pulled a plate from a box, unwrapped the newspaper, and placed it atop the others in the cupboard. He reached into the box again, but found it empty.

"Alright, I'm on a roll," Will said, deftly breaking down the box and dropping it onto the pile to be taken downstairs. "Give me another one."

Casandra looked around, disappearing into their room and returning empty handed. "Um...I think that was it..."

Will did a double take. "Really?Wait, really? We're officially moved in?"

"I guess so," Cassandra said. They looked awkwardly at each other across their new place. "What should we do now?"

Will bent down to grab boxes. "I'll be back," he said, hoping to have a moment to himself to consider her question. "I just unpacked my favorite popcorn bowl. You in?"

Cassandra nodded gratefully, "On it."

As Will walked down the stairs and out the door, he found his mind repeating: what next? As long as they had still had boxes to unpack, the combination of their lives had seemed enough. Monumental, even. But here they were, having gotten this far, and the question still remained: what next?

Will's uncertainty disappeared when he returned to the apartment. Cassandra held a kernel of popcorn in front of poor Agie, who whined pathetically, but stayed still as desired object was placed on her nose. Eyes crossed, the dog stared at it steadily. Cassandra then grabbed the popcorn and tossed it into her mouth.

Will took a moment to enjoy the sight, then grabbed a bag of treats and joined them. "That poor dog is going to wet himself on the carpet and we are never going to get our deposit back," he said. Sniffing out the bag of treats, Agie moved in front of him. Will held out a hand to shake and the dog put his paw in it. Satisfied, Will tossed him a treat and followed it with another for good measure. Will then shuffled close to Cassandra and the bowl of popcorn. When Agie returned, he laid his head at Will's feet. He supposed that life didn't get much better than this.

"I think he likes you," Cassandra said, gesturing towards her dog. "That's good, because if it came to a choice between the two of you- "

"No more choices!' Will shouted, grabbing a handful of popcorn and lunging for the remote. "There's room for all of us!"

...

Micah looked out his mom's window and saw Marcus there. He felt a moment of anger that their location had been found out, but then he felt an odd relief, as though it had only been a matter of time until this encounter became necessary. Unexpectedly, he found himself ready for it. He grabbed a box and opened the door, walking out towards his absent father.

"I've been waiting for you at the hospital," Marcus said. "But I guess you haven't been going in."

"Didn't feel much like it," Micah said honestly, echoing the words he'd often heard the other mutter.

"Yeah, yeah, I know about that," Marcus said, kicking at the ground. "Look, I know you don't have any reason to help me out-"

"Mom wanted you to have this," Micah said, offering up the box and cutting him off. "I think she knew you'd be showing up." With a raised eyebrow, Marcus took it and Micah dropped his hands. "I don't know what's in there, but I promise you, it is all you will ever get from any of us."

Marcus threw his head back. "Come now, she didn't tell you I paid for half of the last house. I gave it up in court because of you kids and not wanting to put you out and all, but that's a lot of money to just hand out like that. I always expected to get it back someday."

"Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure it doesn't begin to equal the amount you spent on drugs out of her accounts," Micah pointed out. "So if you're going after that, I'll see you in court."

"That's not fair," Marcus said. "I took some money, alright, but spent it on a lot of different things. Presents for you and your sister, too."

"What, stuffed animals from those claw machines?" Micah asked harshly. "Those were worth fifty-thousand?"

"Alright, alright, calm down now," Marcus said, perturbed to find his son knowledgeable about these things. "I don't have an argument with you, I just came to get what's mine."

"That," Micah said, pointing to the box. "That is yours. And if you're still here in the next ten minutes, I'll call the police."

Marcus ran his tongue along his remaining teeth, considering. He took in Micah's steady, unyielding gaze, and nodded. "I regret a lot-" He began.

"You should," Micah said.

"Now hold on there-" Marcus whined.

"No, you should," Micah said. He wasn't sure he wanted to say the things he had held deep in his mind for so long, but the words cascaded out anyways. "Do you know that I wake up in fear sometimes? I worry because what if, despite everything I do, I'm doomed to turn out like you? I mean, your genetics are inside me somewhere, right?" Micah asked, his heart racing. "So, what if all it takes is some kind of trigger that suddenly turns them on? Will I suddenly become like you? Will I abandon my children? Will I betray the people I love? Will I steal from them? Will I trade in their happiness for a moment's less pain?" Micah stopped himself and took a moment to gather his breath. "Look, I don't hate you. I should, but I don't. I'm afraid of you. I'm afraid of becoming you."

Marcus kicked at the ground again. "You never were much like me. That was hard for me, but I guess it was good. You were always like her." As he spoke, he opened the box idly, pulled out old pictures of he and Joyce together, and dropped them back with a rueful laugh. "I don't know if I ever told you this, but I'm real proud of you."

Micah shook his head. "She was proud of me. That was enough."

"Yeah, yeah I know she was," Marcus nodded. "No need to call anyone. I'm going. Not really up to keeping a lawyer these days." Marcus hobbled off, though Micah had no illusions that it was for the last time. "But hey, I...you're not like me. You have a...you have a big heart." Marcus held his hand to his chest as though to demonstrate. "It was always so easy for you. I don't know how you do it. All you have to do is let people in."

...

"You've had a bleeder, right?" Tyra said in greeting. When Emily nodded, she asked, "But have you ever had a squirter?"

"I mean...a little," Emily said. "Nothing crazy."

"You should have seen Gina," Tyra laughed. "She was all like 'suction, can I get some freakin' suction in here!' It was really gross actually. I took three showers."

"What was gross?" Asked Will and he and Cassandra joined them at the nurse's station.

"A squirter," Tyra filled them in.

"Ugh," groaned Cassandra. "I had one of those a few months ago. I had to change masks twice."

Will looked at Emily, "You going to the bar later?"

"I am, in fact," Emily answered proudly. "Meeting Micah there, actually."

"Oh, is he coming back to work?" Cassandra asked eagerly.

"I heard he's back on Monday," Tyra told them.

"I can't imagine losing my Mom like that," Will said thoughtfully. "I mean, I not being able to cure someone you love...Maybe I should buy him a drink."

"I'll get the second," Cassandra agreed.

"Yeah, third here," Tyra added.

Will looked at Cassandra for a moment, as though deciding what to do. Then he gestured that they should head out. "That's a lot of drinks. We should probably go get started."

Emily and Tyra nodded as he led Cassandra away.

"Is it weird that I'm nervous about seeing him?" Emily said, looking after them. "All I want to do is run up and...and kiss him...but that's just so selfish of me. I mean, he needs time..."

"He's had, like, months," Tyra said. "Just kiss him already."

"I can't just..."

"You declared your love for Will on our first day here, don't tell me you can't," Tyra said suddenly. "You may be boring and pathetic-"

"Hey-" Emily defended.

"-but you're also, like, the bravest person I've ever met," Tyra finished generously. "So be bold. Get his attention."

"Be bold," Emily repeated. "Get his attention."

"That a girl," Tyra said with a patient smile. "I'll see you at the bar, okay?"

"Yeah," Emily nodded. She looked up in surprise, "Wait, don't you need a ride?"

"Nope," Tyra said wickedly, "Hot Molly's giving me a lift."

Emily raised an impressed eyebrow, then turned her thoughts back to this most recent advice. She wondered how to get his attention.

...

"I was thinking of a quick run instead of a drink," Cassandra said, hanging her lab coat inside her locker. "I mean, I want to go out, bur there's that half marathon coming up and I'm not sure I'm ready."

"Why don't we run tomorrow morning?" Will asked in reply from his own locker. "I think a night off would do us good."

"Last night was a night off," Cassandra said. She lifted her clothes and saw a small card that said "open me." It was attached to a tiny wrapped box. "Um, someone put a...I don't know, a gift... in my locker."

Will shrugged. "Maybe you should open it."

Cassandra turned back and did just this, testing the box until it sprung open. Inside was a small but beautifully designed diamond ring. Heart skipping a beat, Cassandra closed her locker door, and in closing, revealed Will upon the floor, his knees bent and his eyes eager.

...

Micah held up his glass when Will and Cassandra announced their engagement, but as she moved around to display her ring, his attention waned. Emily was late.

AJ sat down instead. "It's good to see you out and about."

"Feels good," Micah said. And it did. "Except for the being stood up part."

"She's probably just running late. Traffic can be tough this time of night," AJ lied. "So is it true? Are you coming back Monday?"

"Yep," Micah said, taking a swig of his drink. "My mom was really proud of me for doing what I do, so...I guess it's time I get back to doing it."

"Well said," AJ teased. "A true poet."

"Dude, shut up," Micah said, laughing. "I'm trying to have a moving moment here."

"Sorry," AJ apologized, trying to contain his grin. "Sorry, start again."

Micah looked at watch his watch again and shook his head. "This is a bust. I should get going."

"Yeah, maybe you should," AJ agreed.

Micah took a step back and looked at him carefully, unable to believe that his friend had just told him to get lost. "Hey, are we okay?"

"We're great," AJ said honestly but briefly. Micah looked around. Something was strange. Then he realized two very odd things: first, the music had stopped, second, that everyone was staring at him.

The he heard the strains of a song coming from outside.

With a sideways glance at all of the onlookers, Micah stepped slowly towards the exit, the music growing louder with each step. He opened the door and saw Emily, seated and playing her cello, her eyes closed in feeling.

Micah stood and listened, his heart growing light. A crowd from the bar joined him and gathered to listen.

Emily looked up as she struck a final chord, meeting his eyes. Her attention drove all thoughts of an audience from his mind. He stepped towards her as though floating.

"I didn't think you could stand being the center of attention," Micah said.

"I can't!" Emily laughed awkwardly, closing her arms tightly. "But I thought that if I couldn't speak to your heart, maybe Mozart could."

Micah smiled. "Did you know that was one of my favorites or did you just guess?"

"Neither," Emily said, smiling uncontrollably. "It's one of my favorites, actually."

"Ah," Micah nodded, stopped within a few feet of her.

Getting up and setting her instrument on the chair, Emily moved closer. "I've been wanting to ask you something..." she began, struggling for words. "It's just, um..." Instead of speaking, she closed the distance between him, her eyes raised and focusing on his lips. Leaning in, she brought hers to meet them.

Warmth spread through his body and their contact lingered. She placed a gentle hand on his side and he drew slightly closer. After several intoxicating moments, she pulled away, her eyes nervously darting between his, searching for a reaction.

Micah licked his lips, letting the surprise sink in. He said, "thank you."

Emily's expression changed from nervousness and hope to the disappointed big-eyed stare of a sad puppy. Micah could hardly stand it. He laughed.

"See what I did there," he roared, "with the...cause you said it first...?"

Cutting off his own words, Micah threw his arms around her and swept her into a passionate kiss. Their bodies entwined so passionately that neither registered the catcalls and cheers from their coworkers and friends.

...

Epilogue: Five Years Later

Micah ran living fingers over Emily's shoulder as she harvested the sparse bubbles of their shared bath and piled them upon her prominent belly. Her collection sparkled by the candle light.

"I was thinking..." She began.

"Uh oh, here it comes," Micah teased. "You figured it out. What is the man in 502 dying from?"

"No! I am not thinking about work, thank you," Emily chided. "Though I maintain that-"

"Nope," Micah said, wrapping his arms around her shoulders from behind and giving her a gentle squeeze. "It is well-established by now that the bath is a work-free zone."

Emily leaned back into him, nodding her agreement. "No," she continued, "I was thinking that we should name the baby Joyce."

Micah placed a kiss above her ear and puts his head against hers. "I think she would have really liked that." Clearing away the bubbles, he reached down to pat her belly, "Hi Joyce."

"Hi Joyce," Emily repeated.

Micah left his hand there, observing, "God you're getting big."

"Hey!" Emily cried. "Not sexy!"

"I just mean," Micah held in his laughter. "It's going to be soon. We're going to have a daughter."

Emily leaned back, craning her head so that their eyes could meet. "You scared?" She asked quietly.

Micah nodded rapidly. "Yeah. Yeah, really scared," he said. Then he added, "Like really, really terrified. You?"

"Out of my mind!" Emily admitted. She shared a nervous smile with him. "But it'll be okay."

"How do you know?" Micah asked.

"Because I'm doing it with you," she said simply.

Micah put his arms around her shoulders again, burying a kiss in his neck and placing his head once more against hers. He said, "Yeah, we got this."

... The End ...

End note: I'm not sure if I'm allowed to mention things of this nature, but if you enjoyed my take on this cancelled TV show, perhaps you would like my completely original story The Rose's Garden and the Sea, which is a free on many ebook storefronts. It has nothing in common with this TV show (except for my love and attention), and has been revised/edited, which I couldn't justify doing for this project (I hope the typos were not too distracting).

I want to add that, though I do not intend to pursue further stories with these characters, I enjoyed spending time with them and you. Thank you all for taking this journey with me.


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